Its spooky month and I'd like to have more drawings of my banette girl https://www.furaffinity.net/gallery.....405424/Ophelia

Subjects will be...boobity? Anyone want to offer their oc to take part in a "dance" with her? Also on the table !

Might draw her again myself but been a bit busy with life things so i have no clue when i can. If you know anyone whose open who'd be good with this kinda thing let me know too.

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/11227887/

good deals here, theyre looking to get a new pc so just figured to give them some boost.

Well, it's been a rather hot week innit? I don't have to say what it is, you all know exactly what im talking about, and the echoes of the event and how its affecting peoples perception and relationship with eachother.

I dont like to talk politics, and I will not get into detail mine, but I will say plainly, if you condone political violence, then don't be surprised if it happens to one of your own. I don't want that, and you don't want that, but you set the precedent for it to happen when you condone it. I dont want the world to slip into balkanized, medieval chaos, it's already got problems as it is.

Either we live in a civil society, or we don't. I will leave it at that. If that's enough for me to be called the hot new buzzword of the week, then so be it. Feel free to DM me if you want to debate and find mutual understanding, but mutual understanding seems lost on a lot of people these days as this event has shown, too many souls weighed down by gravity.

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Anyway, I havent done too much, low energy and all that, and im sure im a broken record saying this a lot. But I do really want to create like I used to again its just so hard to get started again, all the sociopolitical madness has made it even harder. What's also killed my drive is waiting on commissions from so many people for so long I've already paid for...its making me pretty jaded if I am being honest. I pay up front and i just am left in the wind, or i have to nag every few months for even a peep, or dead silence, or excuses. If you want me to come back as a repeat customer, perhaps it would be better to treat your customers right, eh? I guess that's a foreign concept.

I guess I want to expand my world lore stuff for my charas a bit and make an actual setting. Anyone have any advice for that? Just trying to get started is the hardest part i swear, so many false starts, i want to actually have progress made but I need to find some way to train myself to keep up output somehow.

Im feeling really bad and been frustrated about basically everything. I know most people already forgot or dont give a shit about me but now youll get a chance to really not give a shit because im taking a break. Im sorry for not being active i really really wish i was a good artist and knew how to just keep drawing but i just dont. I wish i could connect with people and just have fun but thats just never been the case for me. Im too fucking inept at everything and am very conscious of it to good faith engage with other artists and not feel like an imposter. I just feel so lonely on social media and i greatly covet peoples ability to just regularly be creative and enjoy doing what theyre doing. I want that so bad but i cant have it. I just get to have lethargy and depression instead. So it makes me feel like shit being around people tbh. Im not asking to be good im just asking to be able to enjoy stuff again.

so recently on my phone when i browse FA sometimes the page will be changed to either a fake antivirus or walmart page, an obvious fishing scam. I have adblocker on my desktop, but never set that up on my phone (not that chrome lets that happen anymore anyway). It only happens with FA in particular. Which gives me the impression it was either hacked or the new admins are skeevy and letting this through, desperate for money. Be careful. Guess ill find an alternative browser for my phone, so much for chrome being "secure" lol. Ya blocking adblockers was totally the way to go.

Also an addition, no, i am not clicking on any of the regular artist ads or anything, literally just making contact with the screen on the page can trigger it popping up. clearing site data does not fix the issue.

i dunno man im starting to think people are trending towards worse work ethic for art related stuff. Im happy when there are artists who are courteous and maintain communication with me even if they might take a minute for work ive paid for. However, i feel like im getting burned more than ever on artists who just dont complete work in a reasonable time span with zero communication. Stuff like life happening is valid but there should be some means to actually tell me that so i know and not just being left in the dark.

i have stuff due for over a year now and its pulling teeth trying to talk to them at all and its obvious theyre prioritizing their regulars over me despite me already paying in full SEVERAL pieces for a year or more now. I get the same excuse over and over again oh im sorry for the waiting ill promise to get it done tomorrow...i think theyve said that at least 10 times the past year now. they are doing some, but its like slowly working on one piece of 5 over the course of 3 months, when they regularly make the same kind of pieces in a couple hours for streaming for other clients. Yeah that kinda makes me feel like im being cold shouldered a little bit. I'd say.

Getting tired of being strung along over and over and with overdue work from multiple artists it just feels like maybe im not really a client worth being taken even if im paying up front. I still remember one encounter from years ago, not as relevant, but it was the first time i actually felt extremely disrespected in this way, and am just sad it wasnt an isolated incident. Maybe theres something wrong with me instead :/

i dont like the "thick cum" thing, as in, the semen has the consistency and apparent texture of...well feces, but colored like jizz. And people always like to try to tip toe around that and pretend it isnt like that lol.

random i know just been something ive been seeing a bit more of perusing stuff here and on E621. NGL? kind of a turn off for me, dont let me stop you though if thats your thing, but i feel like if someone said ya i just like poopy looking jizz upfront thatd be more respectable lmao. BASICALLY, it should probably have a tag to filter it because the texture really is just kinda nasty, and im sure thats the appeal for some folks but it should be somth agreed on so those who dont like it can filter it out easily. what "thick cum" as a tag is seems to differ wildly.


As for me, yeah ive just been in gamer land playing stuff, i guess. HAvent felt like drawing too much but i do have a few things to sketch out i just cant promise anything, and i will upload work that ive had done for me soon if i remember. I want to expand my characters a bit. Would any of you like more on Sono? Maybe some stuff for Orlena? Give Gabby more of a background rather than just haha funny beach boob cat?

More parity with my names elsewhere, woo!

You know its really something when you can have a game as beautiful on Switch as Metroid Prime 4, a more niche title than Pokemon: ZA, which looks like a PS2 game. remind me why gamefreak still has reigns on the biggest ip in the world again? Not saying its gonna be a bad game, it actually looks exactly what I want out of pokemon gameplay wise, but man, gamefreak does not deserve slack for how badly they handle production and presentation of these games. No, it looking slightly better than S&V is not a passing grade in the slightest. To be clear, I'm less talking about graphical fidelity and more so presentation and optimization, even with MP4's detail, it looks like it runs very smoothly, while Z-A still looks like it chugs just not as bad as SV, and the sacrifice to details that make buildings pop is very glaring.

you're gonna be looking at buildings 90 percent of the game, so why do they look so bland? all faces are flat with windows and balconies just being flat textures. This is excusable for throwaway battle backgrounds on the 3ds, not a 2025 home consoles overworld. Presentation does matter especially if this is a full price game from the biggest IP IN THE WORLD. Im tired of these excuses man. The pokemon themselves do look animated better which is good, but the humans still look stilted and im assuming theres still no voice acting which is a shame if so.

Metroid Prime 4 is gorgeous and looks like it plays how it should, not as much to say since they only showed a little bit, but the psychic powers are interesting for a gameplay gimmick but I'll be honest im a little weary of Samus always getting these god powers then losing them. Also, "chosen one?" can we stop with this tired trope please lol. Can it just be an actually new, unrelated to the chozo planet? Im tired of the chozo stuff, its very cool, but it needs a BREAK. Though, the end of it made me hopeful, as we see what appears to be a red and steel colored version of the Light Suit from Prime 2, im all for expanding Luminoth lore if thats actually what theyre going for there.

need to redo it.

Saw a post on twitter earlier I really related to, and ive brought it up long ago but idk I still feel immense guilt over it. I was younger, stupid, and not very considerate, and drove people away with clinginess or just a complete lack of understanding boundaries and just the whole idea of letting things go. These people I still respect, but it was my fault i drove them away. I did apologize to one of them, they never responded...so I dunno.

Things have been really hard lately and Ive been in my own head and just overall in a pretty low energy, depressed state. I can barely get any art done, can barely get any games done. Im so worried about my dad, i dunno how its going to be here on out. Maybe it'll get better, but I dunno, I just feel like im at a liminal period and im reflecting on all my mistakes. Even before this i havent had energy to properly interact here and elsewhere. Im a failure in regards to the social aspect.

Yeah had a bad freakout a month ago too idk im sorry i keep making myself look unstable and just bad. I wish I were better for myself and everyone who takes the time to look at my art and comment. I just have to admit to myself...I cant be an artist yet. I do not have it, Im not that guy yet, no skill, no networking ability, no consistent schedule or discipline to always keep doing more, unable to really match my aspirations even a little bit. I have to take that L and accept I just will be a nobody until I actually toil for my goal.

Ill post a failed project tomorrow and a couple commissions i got but just didnt post. Ill even post lineart of my failed pic if anyone wants to color it, cuz man, I feel bad being unable to actually finish it, the drawing was a stellar start but i just dont have it in me to actually make it look good with proper shading.

IDW Sonic #74 was great and honestly some of the best art the comic has had. Paced really well. I do feel like they did a good job cleanly pushing the plot forward, seeing more of Surge and Kits plan and how Mimic is affecting the Diamond Cutters, however I'm afraid I might be right about one of my predictions, 75 onwards, i think Restoration HQ may get destroyed and the Sonic gang are exiled by Lanolin and Restoration Authorities, and Mimic will remain hidden from detection. After this, it might be leading in straight to Frontiers. It's just a shame that we probably arent going to see an end to the stupid rouse plot with Mimic. Sorry its just not convincing and is dragging down the enjoyment of the comics for me as a whole; because it effectively nerfs the intelligence of everyone around him to make this work, and kinda just injects archie style drama into the fabric of the comic. Im sure people will disagree with me and call me a baby about it but I just call bad writing out for what it is.

Overall the issue is good but i am getting tired of this poorly made sub plot Stanley came up with. Doesn't help Whisper still doesn't get to do a damn thing this entire time except drive around. Heck, Charmy and Jewel were the real MVP's this issue.

so I opened a canvas for the first time in a month to draw...it went somewhere...I was having fun....then it crashed, and the auto backups also didn't work. I had an outright tantrum. I have control issues. I threw shit, hurt my wrist, and broke down crying...I feel like this event is telling me I shouldn't draw and I can't have fun like everyone else can. It's not fucking fair. I already struggle enough drawing, my life has been shit and it got worse and I can't even enjoy something I'm bad at, it gets taken from me when I almost gave a fleeting moment of solace.

It hurts also because I feel like I won't be able to replicate it or come anywhere close...I will regress completely in skill now.

Please someone tell me how to feel here and cope because I just think I might give everything up altogether. Should I give up and move on from here or should I keep trying. It's so fucking hard. No one likes my art or characters, is just how it feels, I'm a ghost and I feel like everyone tip toes around my awkward ass.

I'm tired of feeling so incapable

https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10911106/ Check him out he could use some help, i love his work.

his heart stopped at the med vet and we got the call, they resuscitated him and it worked, but he went septic and there was basically no chance of him living any longer than maybe 30 minutes, in great pain. so they put him down.

I hate it because i couldnt be there for him, mom couldnt be there for him. He died alone with the vets. I feel so fucking bad i could puke. It's not fair, we did everything in our power to give him a good last few years, but it amounted to nothing. Let me explain.

My dog Bentley has that compulsive eating disorder that some dogs have, where if it looks like they can fit it in their mouth, they will swallow it whole, compulsively. Even if it's something that can kill them. He went to surgery a couple times before for this, and it makes me sound extremely irresponsible, but we absolutely tried our best nothing was left on the floor, or dropped on the floor. We were as vigilant as possible, but it wasnt enough. It was never enough, and ill never be enough. Thats all my feelings the past few weeks have told me, and this event confirmed it.

Whats frustrating is this time it was an object we didnt have. It was a necklace completely unknown to us, clearly visible in the xray, i dont wear jewelry, nor do my parents or my sister and niece. No jewelry has even been touched in this house for years, let alone fallen on the ground. We are not ritzy people in the slightest. It was entangled in his gut and caused blockage, pain and eventually i would assume cuts and internal bleeding which did him in. We dont know where he could've found it, or how he managed to swallow the thing without any of us noticing, we always keep an eye on him in cleaned up rooms. So what the fuck?

But it doesnt matter now. He's dead, we failed him. The vet failed him, too, as the xray was taken a month ago but we were never shown, and he somehow missed it. Im frustrated, sad, depressed even more so than usual. my mom was very close with him, and its hitting her really hard, things are going to be extremely rough now as i still live with her. Honestly everything about this house is a fucking curse. I need to move out. I cant stand it anymore here.

I want to be an artist and storyteller but no one seems interested and its so fucking hard with all this stuff happening. I wish i could be a gleaming personality like so many other people, and friends passing me by and actually becoming something while Im just fuckin nothin.

Dunno what ill be doing. I wish i could draw more often, but i guess right now that wont happen.

Like, to flesh them out and make them more fun for folks?

what should I do to properly "introduce" them? Really need some solid advice here. Feel like I cant make anything marketable in the sense of it being followable. Its been so long since ive "sat down" to write anything I forgot how to. I feel so inept with my own creations. It frustrates me. Maybe ill give my characters away to people who actually dont suck like i do.

That time of year again fellas. I'm older! And ain't that. Swell. Sorry I haven't posted much, I am working on a couple things and have some other things to post. New character included :D

Kinda been frustrated with it lately. No noticable improvement for a year it feels like. Any particular areas you think I suck in? Composition? Line weight? Anatomy? Perspective (that's a yes lol)? Expressions? Everything?

Idk I'm so slow at it it makes me burn out. I've done gesture drawing but it never helped me. I didn't ever find a method that worked for me, the only way that worked for me was just feeling my way through it and construction, I don't have a speedy hand.

know i havent posted much been busy with life, VIDJA GAME and le depression/cant focus. Making an effort to doodle some more and will prolly post some comms i got recently, mostly of the cute variety :D

I dont think im quite ready yet to open commissions, i need to work on getting a solid set amount of time per day drawing, so i got a flow going on instead of stopping every few doodles. But ill talk more about that when im more confident.

I have thought about opening an itaku account or pillowfort. Would any of you follow me there? Are those places good?

Other than that im working on a few lewds but the lewds may take a quick stop in favor of more middle of the road pinups and safe for work stuff. Boobs are never going away, i guess i just feel like id rather just commission sex stuff? So the next few are me just kinda experiencing drawing that more a little bit.

Gunpla stuff in the works too im gonna make a custom MK V and Nu Gundam if i can help it. Slowly working on a sheep 3d model in that VNE thing and gonna try to convert it into an avatar if i finish it. This is more long term stuff though so dont expect that soon.

I want to write a bit more for my charas so i may make bio entries for ruzgar, orlena, odell, sono mostly. I want to make some more dudes to balance out the roster a bit more. I would love to collab ideas on some of that, so if u got any ideas let me know and we can work stuff out and i might even commission some work from ya.

No, I will not be removing any of my pictures. If I get banned I don't really care. It's a shame since I do like how FA's gallery has been laid out with folders and what not, easy to sort, why i always use it. But if we're going down a puritanical road then I guess that'll be that!

Ill just keep posting until i get banned, wont be threatening to leave or anything. Im just tired of this sort of nonsense every year. It seems it's impossible for me to get a following anywhere.

Art wise. Anything. my chars. Fanart, others chars. Etc. Does any facet of what I do have more interest than the other?

Been in a funk and not sure if I can really narrow down what makes me stand out. Brain fog again and a fair amount of self harshness to boot is keeping me down.

So an artist friend  FA20XX had his laptop, tablet and headphones stolen, that's quite a big hit to any artist, and he's accepting donations to help get new ones. He's offering colored sketches to those who donate. Link here https://twitter.com/fallen20xx/stat.....68052079022080

So I've felt pretty out of it past few days, dunno why but the poor sleep schedule isn't helping, so trying to fix that first. But I've been meaning to kickstart writing background info for my characters but just have t figured out the best way?

Like, I feel like people don't understand what I mean and why it's a big deal to me. I'm not smart so I dont know html or MySQL shit so no fancy web stuff. Microsoft word is annoying and not friendly to converting shit. I want a thing that's easy to use and easy enough to share. I've seen people make wikis but I have no clue how to do that without paying money. Best I've done is blurb s in my art programs but that's a lot of work in references.

I'm just worried I'm going to get stuck with a shitty system again and it'll discourage me from ever trying again. I just want to feel free with it but don't know how?

Controller I use for PC doesn't seem to like emulators and is either not detected or the analog stick makes the game freak out. There's no good way to play the classic sonic games unfortunately, the Origins collection sucks and all emulation attempts have severe caveats, Fusion runs badly, Blastem has controller issues, Genesis collection runs badly AND has controller issues, and Retroarch is a confusing mess.

After failing all that i found out my switch's joycons have drift. What is this bad luck? I just wanted to play sonic 1 lmao