I worked my first night tonight whoo-hoo! Sam showed my the basic equiptment functions and turned me loose on the mic to be Ms. Karaoke DJ Person. I learned how to set up and break down the equiptment, too.

She said that after she's through training me, I have to teach her how I got Eben trained as well as he is. All I can say is Good Luck, I've tried to train men for years to no avail...I got lucky and mine came pre-taught how to be the perfect guy. At lease he hasn't chewed up my shoes or messed on the carpet yet.

(Eben - "Just wait for it.")

X)

I must say I had a great time tonight. The job was easy and fun (OMG, I get paid to do that?!). I made 27$. I'm no longer dead-broke yeeeaaay.

Wow, my hair is still wet 8 1/2 hours after I washed it...o.O

Trying to get some commishes finished up soon.

I still owe a couple of people some art, and I PROMISE you, I will get to it! Things have just been hectic as of late.

I went to Steed's last night to sing, and Samantha started training me to be a karaoke DJ. I'm her fill-in, as well as the Friday (and/or Saturday) night DJ at Captain's Lounge, the place where Eben proposed and we had our reception ^_^

Let's see, I'll get paid to drink, smoke and sing. Um, yeah...I think I've got that covered!

Well, I have to go to the DMV to update my license today. For those who don't know, "DMV" does NOT mean Department of Motor Vehicles contrary to popular belief. Nonononono siree, it REALLY means "Despicable Monsterous & Vile". "Despicable" waiting ques, "Monsterous" procedures for verification (am I going to have to pay that damned ticket before I can get it updated?!) "Vile"ly annoying routine we must go through to drive.

My picture, as always, will prolly look like crap.

Oh well...Might get lucky! Doubtful, but one can always dream...

It's taken me a day to get te time to write up this journal entry. I warn you, it's going to be long and contain alot of details probably only relevant to me...I want to remember everything I can. It was a great day...

Eben had to work from 6 AM til 9:30 AM yesterday morning. He came home and we just chilled for awhile. We had plenty of time, and we were waiting on Amber and Andrew to get here before the guys all went to the old apartment we lived in (with the other South African guys) to get ready for the wedding.

Just to calm my nerves, I had a big bowl of green confidence at about 1:30.

Amber (My maid of dishonor) and andrew arrived at about 3:30, bringing in tote some niiiiiiice sticky green from Atlanta and a 2 feet tall waterbong. And so we all smoked ourselves retarded...We were just sitting on the couch chilling, since we had to wait for Eben and Dusty to skidaddle over to the old place before I could begin getting ready.

So, they leave, and we continue just sitting on the couch chilling. We had time. LOL.

A few minutes later, the guys come back in.

"We have a problem"

Oh, shit.

"What kind of problem?"

"Uh, do you still have the receipt for the ring?"

Oh, shit.

While trying to pull the tag off of the wedding band, it broke. Apparently the tag was supposed to be CUT off. Oops.

So the guys go to do what they had to do, and Amber and I finally got up to get ready.

I changed into my dress - I got it at the dress barn, and have to take it back tomorrow...LOL I just "rented" it. I came out and everyone liked how it looked! We plugged up the curling iron and she went to work on my hair and makeup.

When all was said and done, I was so impressed at the way I looked! Even I thought I looked beautiful, and I typically hate my appearence.

Samantha, probably my best friend here in Savannah, came over at about 5 o'clock to change and go over some last minute details of the ceremony. Sam is actually an ordained minister, so she was officiating our wedding. (Sam is such an awesome person and I'm very, very lucky to have a friend like that.)

She brings over some green of her own, which we smoke out of Old Faithful, my thick glass pipe.

Then, she surprises me and pulls out this gorgeous black bead necklace with a sterling silver pendant, and asks me if I would wear it as my "Borrowed" Item (something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue).

Finally, its time to go and Amber, Andrew and I climb into their nice, air conditioned SUV to travel to TYbee Island Beach.

I've always wanted a beach wedding, ever since I was a little girl. Also, I've always wanted a black wedding dress...Both previous times I was married I didn't get the wedding I wanted, and this time I was going to do things the way WE wanted.

So, we get to the beach and they're about ready to tow my car, which Eben had parked off of the meter...Whoops. Sams 6'11 date diffused the situation though, and gave Eben the parking spot he was in, opting to park farther down. He explained the situation to the officer who was lenient, considering everything.

When I first saw Eben, my jaw dropped a mile. My God, that man is handsome. I get cold chills just thinking about it...He was dressed in black, his hair was just freakin' perfect, his eyes were the color of the ocean...Day-umn. He's sexy. Yesh he is.

So we walk down to the beach, and Samantha gets everything started. Eben does his vows first, and they were so beautiful I could have cried. I hadn't heard them until that moment.

I did my vows, which I'd written in Afrikaans. And I. Forgot. Half. Of. Them. I ended up jumping to the ending far too early, and couldn't think of a way to backtrack properly. Gee, that's embarrassing.

After the ceremony, Sam ran back to the bar to get the reception ready while the wedding party stayed behind to take pictures.

Two of our guests that came down from South Carolina had some car trouble...They thought their starter was messed up. Luckily, it was just a dead battery and a jump with my car fixed the problem.

I rode back here to our apartment with Andrew and Amber. When we got here, I called a buddy and got 15$ a gram Arizona Red, which we smoked while waiting on Eben to get back, since my HOUSE key was with my CAR keys, and since he was driving the Prelude I couldn't get into the house.

Finally we got home, and Andrew & Amber left to go back to Atlanta. We set out for the reception at Captain's Lounge.

We stopped to get Starbuck's Doubleshot Expresso's on the way, and we were already late by an hour...Samantha called and asked where we were, and I told her "We're getting coffee!" She'll never let me live that one down now X)

When we got to the reception, everyone yelled "They're coming! The married couple is coming!" We walked in holding hands, and everyone applauded and whooped at us. They had decorated the whole place! We had a wedding cake and food...Everyone had pitched in and made the reception beautiful.

That bar is filled with some great people. Disfunctional as Sam says, but family none the less. They did so much for us. That's where we got engaged, that's where we are every weekend...It's a great place.

We sang our wedding song, "Believe" by Savatage, together then cut the cake. Oooooh, I smeared Eben's face pretty good :D the cake was marble swirl, which is both Eben and My favorite. Sam can be psychic at times!

Just to continue the string of oddities occurring throughout the day, at the reception the bartender chucked an ashtray at a regular and someone got sprayed by mace.

We sang and played pool until about 1 AM, when we finally went home to make babies X> Which was announced on the mic at the bar...LOL the "Cappy's Lounge Kid".

It was such a great day, from start to finish. Even if Murphy's Law was in effect full force, we made it through and are now husband and wife. I'm Mrs. Sabrina Renee Prentzler. I like that name, I think I'll keep it ;)

Today I found out that Samantha just got a full-time gig at another bar, and now Cappy's wants ME to be their karaoke DJ! I'm gonna LOVE this job! I get to smoke and play with electronic equiptment two nights a week for 100$. We're there every weekend anyway, I might as well get paid for it, heheh!

Whew! This was long, but it was a long day yesterday. But good, none the less.

I'm nearing 500 pageviews! Whomever can show me a screenshot of #500-505 will get a free sketch.

My way of giving back. I love y'all! :D

I got back from a delivery just now shaking like a leaf.

Four cop cars and two Police vans were parked in front of my apartment. I passed a cop turning down the street and he turned around and followed me into my driveway lights flahing. I didn't have my seatbelt on.

All the while, I'm wishing that I had smoked the rest of the joint in my pocket. I figured I'd been caught for one thing or another, and if I was to go down I may as well have been stoned.

I gave him my license, told him that I'd been living here a month and a half, and he let me go with a warning.

Apparently, they're just busting the neighbors today.

I hope they dont ask to search the house...*Shudders*

Shopping lists are a GOOD thing, yes?

I've noticed that unless I create a very specific shopping list, I end up forgetting half of what I need when I go to the store. I've been needing acrylic nails for a week now. I finally got a hammer the other day, but have STILL yet to get metal nails so I can decorate my walls.

Yay forgetfulness!

...What was I talking about again?

Well, my wedding date is VERY fast approaching...September 9th, one week from today!

Our first guest is flying down as we speak, gotta go pick him up from the airport later today.

Everything is coming together. Not exactly as we planned, but it's working out in it's own way.

I'm doing what I want for this wedding, too. Like my old dream of wearing a black dress...White was always bad luck for me.

Trying to clean house right now...Needed an internet/smoke break before getting *shudders* to three days worth of dirty dishes from three people...Lovely! I needed a good smoke for that.

Could someone answer me why it's always "one thing after another"? Is there some mystical aura in the world that intentionally fucks things up where it can - some incarnation of embodiment of Murphy's Law?

I'm being PUNISHED because I attempted to work for two days. Two freaking days! And now I can't get my check, my only steady source of income, for three months. Because I TRIED to work. For two. Days. Part time, at that.

This whole social security system is fucked up. If someone is disabled, how are they expected to live on 600$ a month? They already screwed me over earlier this year by taking my check down to 350$ a month because my *EX* husband worked in 2005.

I feel miserable. Now I have to pull money out of my ass by next week to even come CLOSE to having the wedding we want. Bills? We're fucked this month. I don't even want to go there...

What the hell am I supposed to do? Really? I'm open to suggestions, I'm between a rock and a hard place and am at a total loss for ideas. Our whole wedding was based on me getting my check, which I've gotten for three years now. How am I supposed to pull this off?

On top of everything, I'm having a mixed episode and am having no luck controlling my actions. I feel foolish; how do you explain to someone that you don't see the sky as blue anymore? I forgot how real it is, how different everything feels. I can't get on medicine, because a) My Medicaid hasn't transferred and B) I'm trying to get pregnant, and antidepressants/mood stabalizers are a big no-no for that.

I'm doing stupid things for stupid reasons and have no control over myself. Sometimes its like I'm outside looking into my body, my mind, and I don't like what I see. I feel like I'm two individual parts fighting for control over the same vessel.

I just don't know what to do right now. If it weren't for Eben keeping me together I would surely fall apart. He somehow knows how to keep me right on the boundary of sanity; he's always holding me up and never pushes me off of the edge, so to speak. Without him I'd be broken.

You know, as I think about it, it kinda becomes more clear...It doesnt matter if the wedding goes off without a hitch. It's what the wedding stands for that matters...And I know I will be happy with him nomatter what. I love him more than love itself.

I just wish I could get through all the bullshit.

Stolen from Corgi ^_^

[x] I have walked into a glass/screen door.

[x ] I have tripped on my shoelace and fallen on my face.

[x] I have choked on my own spit.

[ ] I've seen the Matrix a bunch of times and still don't get it.

[ ] I type only with my pointer fingers.

[x] I have accidently caught something on fire.

[ x] I've told a cop to freck off and gotten screwed for it.

[ ] I've attempted to sip out of a straw but it accidently went into my nose, rather than my mouth.

[x] sometimes when I think of something funny, I laugh out loud and people look at me weird.

[x] I've caught myself drooling.

[ x] I've accidently caused an explosion.

[ x] If someone says the word "fart", I can't help but laugh.

[ x] I've turned into a "do not enter" one way road plenty of times. (Bet now ive done this i'll do it on my test x_X)

[x ] Sometimes I just stop thinking & zone out (a lot).

[ ] It is POSSIBLE to lick your elbow.

[ ] I just tried to lick my elbow. (I knew better than to try that! ......again.....)

[x] People often shake their heads and walk away from me. (Not so much now with Eben, but I got that ALLOT with Josh)

[ ] People often tell me to use my "inside voice".

[ ] Gum has fallen out of my mouth while talking (I dun like gum).

[ ] I've used my fingers to do simple math

[x ] I've jumped off a moving vehicle.

[x] I ate a bug for $5 or less.

[ x] I'm taking this test when I should be doing something more important

[ ] I repost chain letters because I'm scared of what they threaten will happen if I don't.

[ x] I've done something really stupid while I was drunk.

[x ]I've ran around naked when I was drunk.

[ ]I've ran into a golfcart tire when I was drunk

[x] I've searched all over the place for something, and then realized it was in my hand the whole time.

[x] I accidently break a lot of things.

[ ] My friends know not to use big words around me.

[x ] My friends like me because I'm fun to laugh at.

[x ] I move my head to the side when I'm confused.

[x] Sometimes I start telling a story and suddenly forget what I'm talking about.

[x] I've fallen out of my chair before.

[x] When I'm laying in bed, I sometimes stare at the ceiling and try to find pictures and words in the texture.

Times your result by four.

21...84% Stoopert. :D

Okay, I was thinking about random things earlier while sailing under the good cap'n MJ when it occurred to me - My life is like a modern day romance novel. It has newer elements like meeting the guy on the internet, and classic ones as well, like the guy being foreign Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsom (Was that not everyone's dream as a little girl, anyway?)

To simplify it in romance novel terms, boy meets girl online and they fall in love, but girl splits because she wants a physical relationship. They remain online friends, and After a few years (and her failed marriage) years they meet up, and realize that old flames die hard. They get together and he proposes in an elaborate fashion after a passionate whirlwind of a relationship.

I could spice it up a bit and have a best-seller on my hands!

Another weird, pot-induced thoughts - a book about someone who keeps a human being as a "pet" in their underground cellar room for years.

I successfully rolled my first blunt today. By hand. Go me! Go me! It was only my second try, too. My first was last year, and it was absolutely HORRID.

I realized todey that it's less than two weeks until my wedding date, and ohmygodihavenothingplanned. I hired a new photographer for 30$ (I got lucky!) and had a good idea for other pictures just now. Maybe I should go to the Dollar Tree and get 10-20 disposable cameras and give them to the first 10-20 guests. They return the cameras to us after the wedding and we get the pics developed over time. It's a genius plan, I think!

I keep having good ideas for the wedding. I'm excited...Never thought I'd EVER do it again, but here I am. I guess when you find the right one, everything falls perfectly into place. *Snugs her lion*

Okay, the other lappy was on it's last proverbial legs. The hard drive constantly hung, the computer froze ever 5 minutes or so. The Network Card just didn't work, the USB slot was broken (It fell!), we had to connect our DSL through a PCMCIA to USB card. Well, the slot pretty much fried recently, and DSL was unusable so we'd been on dialup...*shudders*. The hinge that holds the screen up was broken, we had to prop it against a pillow to use the computer. The casing was cracked and the keyboard/touchpad were loose. The battery pack would randomly cause the computer to not start up properly.

How we used it for our expenditures as long as we did, I do not know.


Eben and I have been doing commissions to get a new computer, but I ended up taking the tablet back *CRIES* so I could rent a laptop...I know we're paying out the wazoo for it, but desperate times call for desperate measures!

It's a Toshiba Satellite. I'm not even sure of the specs right now, I just hooked it up.

It's a good thing that I CAN do artwork without a tablet. Now, I've just got to do one more commission to re-buy my wacom @__@

Oop...The guys are home. More later!

No, seriously, I do. It's a pleasure to be copied, that means that my skill must be improving! I actually feel good about someone else drawing a picture so similar to mine. Novice artists, feel free to copy me! Of course, I'd greatly appreciate a link back, but go right ahead!

It started today when I was browsing artwork, and something caught my eye - it was a picture almost identical to the Kiba fanart I drew a couple of years back. same pose and expression, though obviously drawn by another hand.

It made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I feel speshal, like Jerry's kids! =D

.....Our water is cut off at the moment. we never paid the deposit to get it turned on in the first place (Well, it WAS on when we moved in.....) and they cut it off yesterday. Now we have to wait until tomorrow when my sweety gets paid to have it turned back on...What fun! I absolutely love walking around the house smelling like shit because I've not been able to bathe since yesterday morning! It's SUPER!

Coffee and weed have a strange effect on me. They go well together...Maybe that's why it's called a coffee POT instead of a coffee JAR X)

Okay, stolen this from like, 20 people's journals the past couple of days. (It seems to be the "in" thing to do, so...)

Ask me a question about anything, and I will answer truthfully!

....This could turn out badly o.o

Gas prices are driving me crazy!

Can you believe they are about to get us to the point of being GLAD to pay under 2.50 a gallon?! Bushie baby and his oil cronies have us by the proverbial balls.

We have enough oil in Alaska alone to put gas prices under 1.00$ a gallon for 30 years including inflation, but noooOOooo...

I'm sorry, and I know this opinion won't be welcomed by everyone, but the truth of the matter (in utmost honesty) is that we are a society based on violence. All of the countries of the world were formed because someone got tired of someone else's crap.

I'm tired of our crap. Anyone want to start a country with me? Libertarian government and we'll run on bio-diesel.

Seriously though, we're hardly the land of the free anymore. The government might be there to protect us, which I understand and agree with...But we don't need our personal choices devalued or illegalized when it doesn't harm anyone but ourselves. There is no reason that ANYONE should be stepping in and telling me what I can and can't do with my own body in my own home. If they take away personal choice, then we're all just lemmings jumping off of the cliff. It's all that's left.

Oh wellsers...Random little political interlude.

I don't know how, but I always seem to end up in the ghetto when I move. Seriously.

One of my best friends in K-town (Knoxville, TN for those uniformed...) was a crack-whore, in the literal sense of the world. Oh, the shit we got into...Worse than me an' Kim, because the HVP's (Hardin Valley Princess') just wanted to have fun. Pot was enough for us, though we were a bit of pill heads, too.

Yoki, though, was a trip. She was 47 and looked like she was in her mid-20s. Her husband/boyfriend was her pimp, though she went solo many times. I used to drive her down to Magnolia, which is one of Knoxville's tracks. She'd bring her guys back to my house, which was a safe place, and I'd make some cash for renting them out a room. I started doing too many different kinds of drugs, though, and decided it wasn't for me. I'm a pothead, dammit, that's all.

Here in Savannah, I'm in the ghetto again. And again, my neighbor is a crackhead. We live on a street known as "Dealers Row" and I grow pot.

*sings* we're movin on up (movin on up) tooooo the southeast siiiiiide, to that deeeeeeelux apartment in the skyyyyyy...

I've not done any commission work in years, and never really thought I was good enough to seriously offer commissions...

On a whim I posted a furbid auction, and got my buy-it-now price of 25$! W00t w00t.

On another note, I feel like doing some bright, Lisa Frank-esque art.

And I love Eben. Less than a month to go, and y'all'll (shut up, I live in the south, dammit) have to call me Sabrina Prentzler. I like that name ^_^

For those of you who don't already know, I suffer from Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder, Mixed. And when I say suffer, I mean that everyone around me has to suffer, even though I feel fine.

It's ruined allot of good things in my life. I've had it since I was about 12, though it was misdiagnosed as a host of Axis II disorders (Personality Disorders).

I only found out that I was bipolar in May of 2003, while I was pregnant. I went to a psychologist because I thought I was a sociopath...LOL. It didn't take them long to realize that I was bipolar, and I was diagnosed on my first session.

The scary thing about being crazy is that you never know that you're being crazy. It seems perfectly normal to you, everything makes sense. It's against both instinct and human nature to believe the sky is green when it appears blue to you. But in order to overcome BPD, that's exactly what you have to do - go against instinct.

I dunno...I tend to run off with the mouth. I'm rambling this morning, coffeelicious with a Wake & Bake...Niiiiiiice

Today I made 100$ in the first hour.

Then 60$ later.

I took the rest of the day off...Except for a delivery I'm making between 4-5 PM.

I bought a tablet.

I'm buying some green for a friend later, which means I'll get some.

That means I'm going to be happily submerged in drawing 'til my sweety gets home.

*drools*

I also got a purty new bong! Yayme!

So, I'm wanting to do some trades. If you're interested, let me know! Also I'm up for collaboration pictures...I just wanna do something!

I'm SO in the mood to watch Kill Bill for some reason. Prolly because I have "Bang Bang" by Nancy Sinatra stuck in my head. It's an awesome song...

So, anyway, I'm bitchy as all $*&@ right now because A) it's that time of the month (TMI, deal with it X) ) and B) I just found out that my phone bill is 180$ because of the connection charge. Which leaves me with literally nothing out of my check this month (gotta pay phone, cell, and electric...Yay...) But at least it won't be hanging over my head.

I've been drinking doubleshot expresso's again and working my ass off. When I actually apply myself to it my little home business makes a good ammount of money.

OH! Calling all Savannah, GA people - or anyone nearby - we're looking for a photographer/videographer for our wedding in September. If youre interested, contact meh!

Everyone has a certain "type" of person that, as a general rule of thumb, they don't like. Even Mother Theresa didn't like everyone, she just prayed for forgiveness.

I'm an easy going person, and I try to get along with everyone. In fact, if someone annoys me or pisses me off, I'm more likely to just avoid them instead of confront them. It takes allot to push me to the confrontation stage...

But I hate, HATE whiney attention whores. The ones who think that the world stops spinning just to cater to their every wish, whim and demand. The kind who want to complain to everyone about everything. The kind that ignore logic and reason, and common sense? Never heard of it.

People who will, say, try to rationalize something so irrational that it comes off as comical. You know the type...

A dog can only sniff so many asses before it winds up with shit on it's nose, if you catch my drift.

Lords of Acid is the shizzyt, yesh indeedy.

So. I'm getting ready to go sing karaoke and play some pool wif my sweety. At least, I'm going to ATTEMPT to play pool. I suck. Badly. I couldn't hit the broad side of a barn with a 12-inch 8-ball o.o

But I have fun playing anyway. And when he's playing his worst, and I'm playing my best, I ALMOST beat him! I've beaten him twice for all we've played. I've come close other times, but he takes allot of risks when playing me. He knows he can afford to screw around, so it's good practice for him too.

When it comes to Yahoo! Pool, now...That's a different story, entirely. I rock at Y!Pool. I've been playing for years, and am actually quite good at it. I was one of the top players in the league for awhile...I actually broke up with Eben five years ago over a game of Yahoo Pool. o.O;; Never gonna do that again. I spent years wishing I hadn't left him, but had gotten to him some way, some how. But I guess fate has a way of directing us where to go, and things worked out as they should have. If wishes were horses then beggers would ride.

Fun Fact Of the Day:

Lady Geneva rode her horse bareback through the kingdom "Clad in naught but my long tresses" because her husband said he'd lower the taxes if nobody came outside to spare her the shame of embarrassment.

Fun Fact Of the Week:
I NEED A TABLET.

~~~~~~Born Wild Is Back!~~~~~

The old forum is back up and running, though in the very early stages of development. I BEG of you, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE visit and make just ONE post?

http://www.bornwild.furtopia.org/phpbb2

****** 10 FREE* COMMISSIONS******
Okay, not really free, but I REALLY, REALLY need a tablet. Mine got left in Wisconsin when I moved down here.

So, to anyone who wants to exchange a decent USB tablet (Decent is a relative term, beggers can't be choosers), you've bought yourself an art whore.

Optionally, I'll also take 100$ for 10 commissions, so I can skidaddle on down to Best Buy and get a Wacom.

There are a few stipulations -

For Multiple characters in the piece, each character will subtract one from the 10. Since I add so much detail to each character, it takes longer to do.

I will draw anything, from G to Adult. Art is art, and I don't limit myself because people think it's improper.

Anything with scales I will probably suck at, I warn you...But I'm willing to give it a try. Practice-licious!

You CAN go in with other people to buy me a tablet then split the commissions amongst yourselves.

That's about it!

Okay, after much debating, Eben and I have finally set a date for our wedding.

It's going to be June 9th, 2006. It will probably be in the evening...Prolly right around sunset so I can get the best use out of the tiki torches. Plus the sky will be gorgeous, considering the wedding is going to be on Tybee Island and a beach wedding.

I've found too many dresses that I simply adore...But I think I might have settled on one that I saw the other day in a thrift store. I would post pictures, but since my hubby-to-be visits my account, it would ruin the surprise ;) You know how it's bad luck to have the groom see the bride's dress before the wedding.

We're not following the tradition about not seeing one another the full day before the wedding, though. That would drive me crazy. I luff my fluffy lion-man too much and it would take more than tradition to keep me away from him for a day...LOL.

If anyone has any ideas for the wedding, let me know! I want this to be as memorable as it can be. I've designed allot of the props myself, and the general layout of everything.

I wish I knew a jewelry crafter, because Eben had a great idea for the wedding bands...
Something custom with lions and foxes on it. I thought that was a great idea, and it would definately be unique...If anyone knows anyone who can do custom jewelry, let me know!

I'm torn between having our reception either a) On a casino ship that will actually go out to sea (We'd rent out the banquet hall.)
Or B) Having it at the Captains Lounge, where we're regulars on the weekends.

I'm leaning more towards the Captains Lounge now, because everyone can buy their own drinks, we'll have the DJ and karaoke furnished, and we know the people who work and frequent there (Sam, the DJ, calls us the official Captains Lounge Couple, since that's where Eben asked me to marry him...I still can't get over that...He is SO romantic. I feel so lucky to have somehow captured his heart...Of all the guys in all the world, I managed to find my perfect match...)

Anyway, I'm SO excited! I'm looking forward to this. I fully intend for this to by my LAST wedding. (Well, unless we eventually renew our vows...But I mean that Eben will be the LAST guy I ever marry.)

^_^

You know, it's amazing that, nomatter how fucked up your life may seem, loving someone with absolutely all that you have in your heart and sould will somehow make it all seem better.

Last night I found out that my uncle had sent my horse, Renegade, to the auction in Cookville TN. I had hoped and prayed that he wouldn't sell...Renny was bsolutely my baby. Noone had the same impact on him as I did, and he would rear up on anyone else who would get on his back except for me. He was literally my pet, and that was that.

But of course as my luck would have it, he was the one horse who sold.....

So, I've spent the last four hours crying my eyes out. Fucking my luck.

But somehow, having Eben here makes me feel better, even though I have been feeling like shit all day...