My first stream!
Come watch lol.
IT is on Join.me under TheKuroKuro !! :3

So like everyone else, I have a new years resolution.
NO it isn't to get healthy, ( but I will try and exedrcise and eat healthier)
NO, it isn't to -insert generic/mainstream thing- (but I will probably do that too)

It is to be more confident is all.
I still freak out about how my art isn't good enough.
I put myself through hell and back because the lack of confidence I have.
And how I tell myself it is not good enough, it could be better.
It could be better, but I need to like what I do now.

So, after I finish the thing I promised people/commissioners, I am going to
work on some personal projects to better my art.

I will learn to do these

* Paint in Oil (hyper realism)
* small animations
* become better at coloring (mostly shading and picking nice complimentary colors)
* draw my oc's more
* draw my fursonas more
* draw fanart for once!! (I don't think I ever really drew fan art before LOL )
* work on my fursuits

But before I do any of that, I am currently working on these pieces for
 bakasaka *multiple pieces*
 withkeylymes *reference sheets*

I am excited for the new year! <3

I hope the people I have met and did art will continue to be with me til the very end. ~ <33

Hi everyone!
This is embarrassing, and I need help once more!
I have a leopard gecko named Jo-Jo, and he had gotten an eye infection about 3 weeks ago.
We took him to the vet, and got his eye lanced and ointment. But one week it would look fine and healed,
then the following week, it would be terrible! I don't think his meds are working properly.
Before, I had a job, and was able to take him. I have been out of a job for about 1 month now.
And his eye is so swollen shut, it looks like he has an eye of a frog.
I need help to pay for them to lance it and drain it once more, but when we did that last time, it was around $180!!
I am currently looking for another job, but haven't found anything yet. (I'll take anything at this point to help my little dude)
With left over money, I was able to buy some kind of reptile medicine rinse ( I originally wanted Flukers Repti Rinse but no one sells it around me). It wont cure his problem, but it will keep him from infecting his other eye since he keeps licking both.
The good thing is, he still eats a lot, and drinks water and poop. But His eye is so beyond swollen shut!
The bad thing, is he lost SO MUCH weight, he's so tiny and fragile now. But surprisingly still active!
I will post pictures of his face tomorrow in the morning when I have better lighting!
I want to take him to the vet ASAP!! :/

I also need to pay my credit card bills ( just two cards thankfully). Just the minimum is fine! One is due on Nov. 9th 2015, and the other is Nov. 17th, 2015. ( I know I will be late with the earlier one, but what can I do?)

I think $250 will be enough for everything, both the vet bill and my credit card bills.

My paypal is KuroiKuroi@live.com
Donations or commissions would be greatly appreciated! <3
I will take before and after pictures to show as proof!

So far $0/$250

Thank you in advance whoever helps me and my baby out!! <3 <3

.::Edit 1 Nov. 6th, 2015::.
This is JoJo, BEFORE, he got sick ( http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10361960/ )
And now sick
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18171939/

YUP! Went to my first furcon this weekend!
It was so fun! Met cool people even though I like to be a solitary creature! haha
My mate  vsabertoothv got tons of pictures and so did I!
So we will be posting them later on, and tagging everyone.

If you see people we didn't tag, please tag them. We don't know who they are
and didn't get their info!

I will write more later about our experience.

Okay I am home now to write this.
I am continuing to take You Choose How Much (YCHM).

I will open 3 slots instead of 5 in my previous journal so I don't over load myself.

Remember! It's a PAY WHAT YOU CAN ( I know others are struggling to, that's why I will just do whatever you can pay for a really long time now)


.::Open::.
1. -open-
2. -open-
3. -open-



.::Owed Commissions::.
1.  withkeylymes 90% done (tweeking it up)



* One character only
* ANY breed of species is fine
* ANY gender
* Any fetish ( that includes but not limited to baby furs, porn, solo, water sports, macro/micro, inflation, etc. that doesn't bother me one bit I'm massively open to things)

Won't do:
Digimon/Godzilla porn of anything, no solo, no nude, no digimon/godzilla like character in a porn(o) kind of way
(I'm not comfortable because those are my safe go to happy places where nothing is sexual, so please don't bother me about it.)

AS for art. I am constantly changing my style and I apologize to my commissioners.
I guess I am still in my faze of finding my own style. Sometimes I like it, and then like most of the time
I hate it and it slightly changes. I am reading tutorials on how to color and shade properly and how to use
colors properly. You most likely will get a picture more then what you paid for, because I try to go all out
and do more to surprise my customers. I hope you do like it, because I am trying my hardest to not only improve BUT to also give you a piece of artwork you will cherish! c:


Even though I work, I am still in need of money. I continue to help my dad
and my family over seas. And I only make so much unfortunately.
So because of that, It put me so behind in a lot of things.
I have been living off of my only credit card for 3 months now, and maxed it out.

After I fix up and finish  withkeylime 's commission
I'm opening up another Pay What You Want slots.

I need money to help pay bills lol
I have been helping my dad with his bills and my family over
Seas, that it put me so behind in debt.

My credit cards late maxed out.

So I will edit this Journal later after work.

Slots
1 -opened-
2 " "
3 " "
4 " "
5 " "

I really need somewhere to vent.
I feel like I'm drowning and I can't anymore.

I don't understand why I just can't be happy.
I don't care anymore if it affects other people. I am not going to back down
and continue to be miserable because another person can't be happy.

Why do I need to continue to suffer?!
I just want to be happy for once. Genuinely happy!
I'm tired of taking the weight of other peoples emotions and such on my shoulders.

I not only feel caged in a small quart. I feel cornered even more so then before.

It's affecting my mental state, my health and my living and work.
I had a panic attack, which caused me to miss a day of work.
Which caused me to get suspended from work for 1 week.
It's putting me back from finishing owed/paid artwork, artwork for myself, for my portfolio.

My heart is so heavy right now, I wish I could fade away. Be nothing.

Okay so this is an update on what's been happening.

To Do List:
• Pay Manager back ( owe $300)
• College class ($100)
• Re-new drivers permit ( $80)
•

Finished List:
• Vet Bill (Paid)
• Dad's Medicine ( Picked up, paid, shipped)
• Phone Bill / other bills
• Dad's storage unit bill


Commission list:

1. withkeylymes
2. -open-
3. -open-

Remember! It's a PAY WHAT YOU CAN ( I know others are struggling to, that's why I will just do whatever you can pay for a really long time now)

* One character only
* ANY breed of species is fine
* ANY gender
* Any fetish ( that includes but not limited to baby furs, porn, solo, water sports, macro/micro, inflation, etc. that doesn't bother me one bit I'm massively open to things)

Won't do:
Digimon/Godzilla porn of anything, no solo, no nude, no digimon/godzilla like character in a porn(o) kind of way
(I'm not comfortable because those are my safe go to happy places where nothing is sexual, so please don't bother me about it.)



AS for art. I am constantly changing my style and I apologize to my commissioners.
I guess I am still in my faze of finding my own style. Sometimes I like it, and then like most of the time
I hate it and it slightly changes. I am reading tutorials on how to color and shade properly and how to use
colors properly. You most likely will get a picture more then what you paid for, because I try to go all out
and do more to surprise my customers. I hope you do like it, because I am trying my hardest to not only improve BUT to also give you a piece of artwork you will cherish! c:

This is going to be a rant.
So, you don't have to read this part.
I will divide the rant and help part with dashes.

..::Commissions to help with HELP WITH BILLS::..

Still the same rules:

PAY WHATEVER YOU CAN ( I know others are struggling to, that's why I will just do whatever you can pay for a really long time now)

* One character only
* ANY breed of species is fine
* ANY gender
* Any fetish ( that includes but not limited to baby furs, porn, solo, water sports, macro/micro, inflation, etc. that doesn't bother me one bit I'm massively open to things)

Won't do:
Digimon/Godzilla porn of anything, no solo, no nude, no digimon/godzilla like character in a porn(o) kind of way


So like in my previous journal ( http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6448012/ )I stated I needed help.
I was generously helped by commissioners, and I appreciate it so very much! I was able to do this much. ( crossed out in the old journal what got done, but will also write it here)

1. Vet Bill ( Paid )
2. Dads Medicine ( paid, picked up and sent to Philippines)
3. Phone bill and other bill ( Paid )

I now have 2 more things added to the list I need help with. Which is annoying in of itself.
I still need to pay these things.

4. My manager back ( I owe him $300 since last October of 2014, he's kind and patient, but I wanna give it back to him as fast as possible!! )
5. New laptop ( Mine died in the beginning of September, but this can wait a little longer it's not that important, I use my phone as a tiny laptop for now)

Now I have these three new things to worry about.

6. Dads storage unit ( cost $418 my dad has until April 7th 2015 to pay it or loose all of our stuff )
7. College class bill ( cost $800, my last class cost that and I can't graduate without it)
8. License ( My permit expired on my birthday back on Feb. 28th, 2015 , I don't now how much that one will cost)

Mind you, I work Monday Tuesday Wednesday, and Thursday. I ( originally was suppose to attend college on the weekend but that piece of shit school
fucked me up for a 2nd time. So I have been out of college for a whole year, I only have to take one more class to graduate. Of course they mess me up on
something I am so goddamn close to. Sometimes, in full honesty, I want to quit. Just give up. But I have a burning desire deep withing me to not do that.
That is not an option.)
SO since then I am taking commissions and working on my portfolio on the weekend.


Current commission list:

1.  WithKeyLymes (re-working and fixing up sketch ) -in my scraps-
2. -open-
3. -open-
4. -open-
5. -open-

---

..:::RANT:::...

I am pissed off. I am not in a happy place atm.

/rant

Yay.
I am 23 now.
:>

Yup, I am in need of help.
This will be up for awhile.
I will take whatever anyone gives me (can't go any lower than $1) and will draw a simple flat commission (no background and just 1 character).
I don't mind the gender, the breed, or the theme ( no digimon/Godzilla porn).
Give me about 72 hours to finish the commissions (seeing as what is going on -just read below-)

Example 1: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10366016/
Example 2: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/13798090/


AGAIN: Here are the "rules".
1 Character ONLY
Just keep it really simple please
NO DIGIMON PORN OR GODZILLA PORN (my only no-no rule)


DETAILS:
No background
ANY BREED ( the weirder the better :3 )
ANY Gender
ANY theme/fetish (gore, baby, sport, porn etc.)


I am looking forward to someone helping me out!! <3

I will try and sum it up as best as I can here (probably won't and fully explain it like I normally do).
I just need some extra cash to pay for my vet bill & medicine, my dads diabetes medicine to be shipped to him, and a new laptop (broke months ago), and other bills/things.

What happened was, I was visiting family in the Philippines ( I was gone from Dec. 29th ,'14 - Jan. 19, '15, so for 21 days I was gone), and while I was away, my mate told me that something was wrong with my Leopard Gecko (before I left, she was taken to the vet, because something was up with her vajayjay. So they fixed it, I gave her antibiotics for 10 days and I thought she was okay because she looked fine and healthy again). Something happened to her ( I am assuming an infection?? It looks EXACTLY like this https://farm3.staticflickr.com/2511.....e62_z.jpg?zz=1 ) it happened right near her eye like in the picture. Both her eyes were swollen shut even though the lump is only on one side of her face. And then the infection near her vajayjay came back, (which I have never once had any health problems with her and I have had her for about 6-7 years now), and because of that, she wouldn't eat while I Was gone. So she lost so much body weight, I thought she was going to die and she only held on for so long just so she could see me one last time before she moved on. I have no idea what it was, but the vet lanced it and puss came out. (they had to do an emergency thing on her which caused them to post pone an operation they were going to do on another animal) so I got charged $144!! That was without the medicine!! They allowed me to not pay the bill, and wait until I get my paycheck. They instead with held her medicine and didn't give it to me. Which they weren't happy because they are taking a huge risk on me. BUT I have to go back, my Schnitzel depends on the antibiotics. I'm not just going to leave them high and dry, and not get my baby her medicine!!! She's my little best friend! I, honest to the milky starways, do not know how much the medicine is going to be. I explained it (my situation) to the lady, but they didn't really seem to care. Yo I was hysterical crying, and only one lady seemed to care, but she was the receptionist.

BUT, I asked my work if they could load me with maximum hours before my first paycheck I get back since being here. I explained to them, and I got as much hours as they could give me, seeing as I am part time.
SO I am hoping my paycheck can cover both the $144 AND medicine bill.

<Edit 1 Fed. 3, '15:>Okay, the vet bill was paid, and Schnitzel got her medicine!! Their was a hole on the side of face from the lump thing falling off, I have been giving her, her medicine for a couple of days now. The hole is almost gone! Her eye is opened now, and she is eating more and hella active yay!!

And then, My dad is still in the Philippines (he got remarried 2 years ago so he visits his wife and my new little sister once a year until they can come to the USA) , so I have to send him his diabetes medicine through the mail. Because he was only allowed to take so much prescription medicine from the Pharmacy he picks up. He would like me to send it as soon as possible, but with the vet bill and this, it's becoming very difficult.

<EDIT 2 March 6, '15:> Okay so I was able to send my dad his medicine to the Philippines like a week or two ago. I forgot to edit this the day it was on. BUT I now remembered.

And a couple of months back (I believe around September) my laptop broke.
It just died one night out of nowhere with no warnings lol. ( I mean I have had it for what 5-6 years now?)
And I have to barrow my mates laptop, but it's difficult.
He wants to be on his laptop and skype with friends while playing video games (which I totally get0, but I wanna check my email, do school stuff, watch youtube videos, etc. SO I need to get a new laptop. u.u


I tried taking as many hours as I can at work since I got back, so I can at leat pay the vet bills.
BUT I still need money to send my dad his medicine, and to pay my other bill (only about $40) BY OR BEFORE FEBRUARY 9TH 2015 and I have to pay my manager $300 back (he was very kind to help me in my time of need)!! Ugh, life, why do you do this to me all at once. /sits in corner

<EDIT 2 March 6, '15> I paid my phone bill and my other bill. So I am good with that!

The laptop can wait, so I'm not really in a rush for that. Just everything else I'm worried about.

So in conclusion, if you wanna help out and commission me, just note me. OR if you don't like my art/ or just wanna help out and donate something (anything counts, even $1!!) my Paypal: KuroiKuroi[at]live.com

As for paying, I really don't know how it works on paypal. I have been reading so much things that people pay a different way. I guess pay how you normally do when you commission other artist? I am still reading and learning about that since I don't do these kinds of things normally. Dx

Been awhile since I have been on. Lifes hard without a laptop to check mail.
And talk to people. Ugh

But I will give an update incase people are wondering what happened.


WELL. FIRST. I quit my job at Gamestop. Was being treated as shit for almost
year (quit somewhere between last month, this month would have been
1 year there). My manager and assistant manager were massive sexist
dicks. Taking my days away were I wouldnt work a week. And they only gave
Me 1-2 days and little less than 3 hours those two days!!
BUT I had a 2nd job at Pathmark, so I am their instead with maximum
Hours!! ~

Am not attending school this semester. Both schools screwed me over
And I can't attend. I am 2 credits shy of graduating from the community
College, but have to wait even longer now.
In the mean time, I will use this time to build an actual portfolio and
NOT play around anymore.

In all this time, my laptop broke. So now I have to save up for a new laptop
Cause my screen died. I just need a new one caude that one was slowly
Dying anyways. I've been using my phone as a teeny tiny laptop. LOL

And in the mean time, I have been working on a fursuit for someone.
It's slowly happening, and I just have to make the jaw set and eyes.
I'm making a realistic and toony version of the fursuit. At the moment I
Only have the head made. I will make the tail, hands and paws for now.
And than figure out how to make the suit later.
If I can do more of these I will and maybr open a commission on my other page. :3

I will post pictures in a couple of days!! :U

But that's what has happened so far!!

1.) I am actually looking to do a cosplay that is a quadruped (not a fursuit. an actual Cosplay of a mechanical character).
And I need some that will even me out and not make me look weird and retarded when I stand on all fours.
(Well not too uneven. I know I probably won't get the maximum evenness I would like to achieve! LOL )

2.) I also need some that I can make feet like Baby Godzillas from the 1999 movie.
Example: http://cinetropolis.net/wp-content/.....gzla083od2.jpg
I can see that they are not the typical stilts I find on ebay.


If anyone knows anything whether it is to build my own, know a website, or knows someone who can build me one
Please leave me a message or private note me please!! <3 Much appreciated!

-KuroKuro

Anyone want to exchange? I have both X and Y.
Here is mine. Add awayyyy. LOL

4527-8720-3212

Anyone have a Honkrow I can have?? I want my Halloween team. u.u
Also looking for all the starters.
Also Gengar, Alakazam, Machamp, and any others that require trading. c:

Gah sorry for a lack of updates!!
But I am doing fine now, just patiently waiting for school to start back up. Only have 2 more semesters before I get my degree! :D

But yeah I am doing a pay what you can/want. Want to start to save up for an apartment, and Trying to save up money to go to FA:U/Furfright and other things. And I need to do it now so I can be ready!! It'd be my first fur con, plus I also need to save up to finish making a fursuit and other stuff.

So since I have no job atm I figured I would do NAME YOUR PRICE FOR A CLEAN SKETCH.

So just leave me a message and I will have them posted tomorrow/immediately. <3

I just learned one of my new friends that I made at college,
his dad died Friday.
And it hit me so hard. I mean I know I barely know him, but for him to lose his father so young!!
My friends around my age so I think he's 18-21.
And it made me think of my dad and how I can loose him at anytime, and be left alone in this world. Because he's my only parent.
Sometimes I forget things like this happen. And it scares me when I think of it. Not death, I am not afraid of it, but to loose someone so dear to me so early. And never hear their voice, or see their face, or smell them.

So I just remembered our mortality and our life is one giant Russian Roulette !!


Going to try and draw, and get my mind off of this sadness.

Like crap when you do artwork?
I can draw a million times better on paper with pencil.
But when it comes to digital art, it just seems to be missing a ton of something.
I keep practicing but it just doesn't look so good.

it's really discouraging. Anyone else have this problem and learned how to fix it? u.u


P.S my dad and I are still trying to get my money back or at least something in exchange. :/

They said to my father they are not refunding me. At all. Because my ticket is non refundable.
They are just money stealing assholes. People just don't have $2000 to throw around willy nilly.
Especially young college students who struggle. Or Anyone in that matter.
I would be relatively okay if my ticket was less then $300. But it's not!

I wish this would make the news or someone with a higher power could do something about it.
That was every cent to my name. Now I have nothing and my money was taken from me, and I don't even
have anything to show for it.


So now I will have to be super desperate until I find a job of some sort. I will do any commission for any price. As long as it's two characters max. I will only go up to flat colors because I am not the greatest at coloring (still practicing, unless you want me to try on your drawing). Any help would be greatly appreciated even if it's a journal.

*also this help money I will use to get my license and a car if anyone was wondering so it can help me get a job

I feel so sick and numb. Like I am having an outer body experience.
I am shaking right now.

First the government wouldn't give me my passport and made me miss my flight. And now United Airlines won't give me back my refund. I used my school money to buy it. I don't have a job and have been saving that up for 2 years. And now, it's gone. And I didn't get anything out of it. I can't stop crying. This would have been my first trip anywhere. And now I can't go. But I refunded my money a week before my flight. Not lke the day before or on it. I don't understand. I feel like throwing up.

This is what it sad:



Dear Kayla Gardner:

Thank you for contacting Customer Refund Services regarding the above referenced ticket.

Customer Refund Services makes every attempt to please our customers; however, there are times we cannot offer a favorable response. We regret that we cannot issue the refund requested, and would like to explain why: United Airlines offers a wide variety of fares that appeal to different segments of the traveling public. Some fares, such as yours, are highly restricted and valid only on designated flights. The fare purchased carried the restriction of being non-refundable and non-transferable. It was designed to accommodate customers who are price conscious to receive a substantial savings over a regular full fare ticket. These highly restricted, non-refundable tickets must be reissued or cancelled prior to the initial outbound travel date if they are not used as purchased. All non-refundable tickets not reissued or cancelled prior to the outbound travel date have no monetary value.

We wish our reply could be more favorable. Please be assured that United Airlines values your business and we look forward to serving you again in the future.

Sincerely,

Customer Refund Services




I don't know what to do.

Yeahhhh.
I bought Skyrim for Ps3 and 360. Expecting not to be really into it.
Then I learned I can be a cat or a lizard.
Then dragons and soul capturing and shouts happened.
Then I disappeared for 3 weeks in my room playing nothing but Skyrim and getting side tracked from my main quest and exploring and being a vampirewerewolf hybrid. >.> <.<

But yeah I am still alive, LOLOLOL.

Still working on things and such. ^^

My mate and I and my irl friend have been wanting to be in a yiff picture (sorry I have been dying to legitimately use that word). And since neither of us know anyone else but us 3, does anyone want to join?

their is us 3 and possibly looking for 2 more characters. Guys or girls are fine.
Now I don't know when this will be done, because I am busy a little bit with other things.
But just wanted to see if anyone doesn't mind joining the picture?
It doesn't matter what species either. And if you have a certain fetish lemme know. I will try to incorporate it in the picture too. ^^


Well bye for now and let me know! c:

:edit: I also don't mind peoples characters. You can be skinny, small, tall, chubby, inbetween, really big. I am not one to fusss about that. ^^

I feel very proud of myself. Spent like 40 mins running around outside.
Next door neighbors were in my boyfriends yard trying to capture what appears to be someone white rabbit that maybe got loose. So someone may have lost their pet rabbit.
But wholy balls. That rabbit was huge!! I mean he was the size of a little kid!! O.O I have never seen a rabbit that size!!
But yeah I threw myself in front of traffic to make sure he didn't get him. That's how much I love animals. I am literally willing to jump in front of moving cars to protect it. Because I know I will be fine and that humans have more of a "right" and you can't really "put me down" because I got injured. Like you could do with an animal.

But any who so the neighbors (after I caught him) are going around seeing if anyone lost a rabbit. Very glad the bunny is okay and safe, now I know he won't get hit by a car! :D


That is all. ^^ Looking for his owner now.

I have always wanted to do a youtube channel of my own. But been afraid and ashamed of myself.
But now I feel it's time to take a huge ass leap in my life and stop being so scared.
I was always afraid of the hate mail and no followers.
But you know what? FUCK IT, going to throw myself out there.

Hopefully people will like my channel and I grow into a stronger person. You guys can watch me change over time and I get to know more people and experience more things and myself.

My channel will consist of these:

Reviews on games (I'm not very good at it but want to try)
Reviews on makeup
Reviews on clothes
OOTD (outfit of the day)
OOTN (outfit of the night)
Play throughs of my games (like how Piediepie does it though I probably won't talk much but will try)
Video recording of my traditional art
Video recordings of my digital art
Video recordings of me sculpting/fursuit making
Before and afters of me (growing my hair out and toning my body up)
Hauls
etc.

Seeing as I don't really seem to go out much and prefer to stay inside all the time (mostly because all my friends work and I don't have a job just yet) I need to do something productive with myself. :3

But yeah that's what I want to do. Wish me luck guys!!

Im in such a feely mood.
I dont know what to do.

Just finished playing Jak and Daxter the precursor legacy. Want to play my Ni No Kuni
Game. Along with my Devil May Cry DmC game. And have been watching Godzilla.

GUYS. ITS SO INTENSE. MY FEELS.
DO T KNOW WHAT I WANNA DRAW MY FURSONA AS.
OTTSEL? GODZILLA? A NEPHILIM? A MAGICAL SAGE?

HOW BOUT A OTTZILLA SIZED NEPHILIM SAGE?? LOLOLOL

/shot