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Building Forum RP's is...Less Than Stellar
Posted 18 years agoI own a guild on Gaia; well, two actually.
They're both RP guilds. So it's obviously a play-by-post forum deal.
It's fun to RP.
But building the RP.
Sucks.
Terribly.
Someone save me.
I'm going to go insane.
Watch my head explode.
<3
They're both RP guilds. So it's obviously a play-by-post forum deal.
It's fun to RP.
But building the RP.
Sucks.
Terribly.
Someone save me.
I'm going to go insane.
Watch my head explode.
<3
Daniel's Rant VI: I've Got My First Hater! :O
Posted 18 years agoHehe...
You know, when I come face to face with descrimination, I do one of two things. Sometimes I get pissed off; but it takes a troll of either great intelligence, or great stupidity, to get me to that point. Most of the time, I can't help but laugh. But, you might ask, "Jynnx; why do you find being hated humerous?" Well, boys and girls, gather round; I'll teach you a little something about the human capacity for acclimation.
Even beyond their capacity for intelligence, or love, or wisdom; human beings have one real advantage over most other animals. We can adapt to, almost, any environment we happen to across. As long a the basic components of our life are there (oxygen, nitrogen, water, nutrients, etc.), and there aren't any highly poisonous traits present, we can adapt no matter where we go. Some might argue that, and say that its our ability to adapt any environment to suit our needs that is our greatest advantage, but that's a discussion for another day.
Now, knowing what you do about acclimation, realize that people often become numb to something if they experience it on a day-to-day basis. Which is part of where the "Heaven is Hell" mentality starts. Once again, though, that's a discussion for another day. What I'm saying is, that I've already acclimated to being insulted, being thought of as a monster. So really, if you want to make me feel bad about who I am... Well, to not beat around the bush, that's not gonna' do it.
Now, I'm really past the point of giving a flying fuck about preserving privacy. As any of you who regularly read my rants know, I rarely actually name/link-drop; unless I need to use that person as a specific example. In this case, I just don't care. For a few hours, I'm going to embrace the philosophy that posting something in a public format automatically mitigates any right to privacy you may have. Why? Who knows.
I suppose I'm just...not necessarily angry or irritated, but at my wits end. No, don't get me wrong. It isn't about the person's thoughts, or their beliefs, or even the fact that they're acting upon those beleifs. It's the fact that they went behind my back, and started talking shit. They didn't even have the balls to come to my face and say what they were thinking. Just that they were unwatching me. That kind of cowardice is one of the few things that really gets under my skin.
So, I'm sure you're all thinking, "Come On, Jynnx, stop beating around the bush; Let's dissect some stupidity already! That's what we're all waiting for!" Pushy bastards. Naw, I'm kidding. I love you people. <3
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/194445/
"I don't want to know about it.. I'm as open minded as the next furry but there are some things I don't want to know about, it came to my attention rather recently about a person who has things I wish I never knew."
Oh, Hells. Starting right off the bat with a logical fallacy. That's never a good sign. Alright, let's do this in a bulletin format, shall we? Oh, and, open-minded you say? I think not. Pft.
1. Nobody forced you to read anything I've ever made. My profile, submissions, or journals. No one's holding a gun to your head, saying that if you don't look at my art, they're going to blow your brains out. And if they are saying that, you would probably be better off letting them. That way your eyes don't burn out of your skull because of the ugliness. LAWLZ.
2. Okay, you don't want to know. That would be fine, but... I don't want to know a lot of things, myself. I didn't want to know that my biological father was more interested in why my mother was getting remarried, rather than asking about how I was doing. I didn't want to know that my best friend is the biggest closet homophobe. I didn't want to know that it had been my ineptitude that had killed my pet rabbits.
Are you really so self-centred that you think you're the only one in the whole world who's learned something he didn't want to know? Do you really think you're the only person in the whole world that stumbled across information that he didn't want stuck in his head? Egotistical fool.
DO YOU THINK YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW I WAS A PEDOPHILE!? ARE YOU THAT FUCKING ARROGANT? Do you really believe that I wanted to know that my heart beat for people I could never have. That my desires could burn and yearn for people I could never touch? Never kiss, never hold; not even forge romantic interests with? You don't even know what it feels like, you fucking idiot. You have no idea how much it tears at my heart to know that, even though I have never touched a kid, I'm automatically some evil monster because of my own thoughts? As if I can somehow control them. You don't know what it feels like to be told everyday of your life, that it's your fault for being weak enough to feel those thoughts. Like I can turn off sections of my brain at will.
Moving on.
"Maybe I should have read the userpage before putting them on watch, but I don't tend to do that as I'm lazy so its more my fault."
Gee, ya' think? *rolls eyes* There are so many things wrong with this statement... I don't even know where to start. Actually, nevermind. Yes, I do.
1. Going through my profile wouldn't have helped you, since I didn't put that it into the revisions after you'd watched me.
2. You say you're open-minded... But the very fact that you're willing to insult and condemn someone for something that they feel, but have never acted upon, proves that you are the real monster. It proves that you're only open-minded when it comes to things that you agree with. You don't even know what the word fucking means. Being open-minded has nothing to do with acceptance or tolernace, brat. It has everything to do with keeping your eyes open. With being able to discuss things openly, face to face, instead of running around people's backs, and try to learn something, you nitwit.
"I read a journal their journal then from there to their userpage, and to be honest I was sickened and appalled that they would openly admit such a thing."
Ah, yes. Because the mind is such a terrible thing to use.
"Yet I do not want to know if you are a pedo in real life, that's sick just sick and wrong thinking of children in that way who aren't even of legal age."
Really? Then why is it every reputable psychologist disagrees with you? Give me a link to a singe respected article or psychologist that says otherwise, and I might listen to you.
At any rate, the real point of quoting this part was as follows. Thoughts are inanimate. They cannot be good or bad, even if you believe in such a dichotomy. They cannot be positive or negative, they cannot be sick or healty. They are thoughts. They are neutral. Potential, not substance.
And yet... No one has once told me, no matter how many times I ask, what exactly one needs to understand about sex for it to be consensual, and not rape. No one has ever bothered to answer my question of what information is miracalously bestowed upon us the minute we hit 16 years of age, that we didn't know before. If you don't believe people under a certain age know what needs to be known, that's fine.
BUT DO NOT;
I REPEAT;
DO NOT;
MAKE FUCKING BLANKET STATEMENTS AND THINK YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH IT WITH ME.
If you want to argue that, then tell me what that information is, for fuck's sake! Tell the world, so you actually have some kind of logic from which to argue, rather than emotion and logical fallacies out the ass. D:< IT'S NOT THAT FUCKING HARD A QUESTION. WHY WILL YOU PEOPLE NOT ANSWER!?
"Get the fuck away from me."
But... NO.
JUST. FUCKING. NO.
YOU were the one who came to me. Sure I watched you first, but it was you who initiated actual communication. Don't even fucking go there.
"I also don't want to know that you want to fuck your dog or your horse or any kind of animal, that is the kind of shit that gives furrys a bad name."
Actually, no, it's people like you. People who are so obsessed with sex and porn, that they make a point out of putting that in their first impresions on people. Seriously, go look at this person's profile. What's right there? "I like porn."
It's also fursons who go out of their way to try and make different people feel unwelcome in the fandom. Why do you think so many potential newcomers turn away? It's not because they don't like the idea behind the fandom. It's because they don't like the execution; the people in it who have this abhorrent need to put themselves on a pedastal, and look down on others for any "slight" they can find.
And you have the gall to blame me? Seriously, WTF?
"Do you know how many people out there already think that we all go around fucking every four legged animal we can find?"
OH.
OOOOOOH.
OOOOHOHOHOHO.
NO YOU DIDN'T. YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT.
So, in your logic, I'm so supposed to pretend to be something I'm not... Supress myself... Lie not only to me, but everyone I care about...
So that you don't look bad!? FUCK THAT.
"So if you got unwatched and blocked by me and a friend of mine cos yes I told her, then its your own god damn fucking fault."
And, if you'd actually read my new profile, like you claim to have, you'd know that I don't give a fuck. If you can't accept people for people, no matter who or what they are...
Well, that's you loss. I don't need "friends" like that. I already have real friends who accept me in my totality. Lovers who are willing to let me touch them, even though they know what I am.
And that...
You are an arrogant, pompous, fool if you think anything you can do or say can take that happiness from me. Don't even bother trying.
On a...less retorting note...
I'VE OPENLY ADMITED MY PEDOPHILIA NO LESS THAN EIGHT TIMES. EIGHT.
And that's just the one's I could find. You were watching me for most of them. And now you're raising a stink about it? You wait until after I've finally started learning to open myself to the public, until after I mention that I have people who care for me unconditionally, to try and cause problems?
Well, you did cause problems. You did cause drama. But somehow, I think, if you ever read this, you'll realize it's not problems for me.
It's problems, for you.
Lastly, and this applies to everyone (except my lovers and actual friends; you can ignore this warning and do it anyway, and not suffer my wrath. Yes, I play favorites.). DO NOT. FUCK. WITH ME. If you have an issue with me, have the balls to bring it up, to me. Do NOT go around my back, whispering behind me, thinking I'm not gonna' find out.
Do not think, for a second, that you can play this game with me. I guarantee you, you can't play it on my level.
Lastly...
I'm sorry for wasting everyone's time; those of you who actually read this. Feel free to forget you ever bothered. I'm just venting, 'cause I'm pissed. Take it as seriously, or as unseriously, as you desire. And feel free to ask me quesionts. My rants are always open to comment. Trolling and flaming? No. Discussion and education?
Yes.
(PS... Am I ED worthy yet? >_< )
You know, when I come face to face with descrimination, I do one of two things. Sometimes I get pissed off; but it takes a troll of either great intelligence, or great stupidity, to get me to that point. Most of the time, I can't help but laugh. But, you might ask, "Jynnx; why do you find being hated humerous?" Well, boys and girls, gather round; I'll teach you a little something about the human capacity for acclimation.
Even beyond their capacity for intelligence, or love, or wisdom; human beings have one real advantage over most other animals. We can adapt to, almost, any environment we happen to across. As long a the basic components of our life are there (oxygen, nitrogen, water, nutrients, etc.), and there aren't any highly poisonous traits present, we can adapt no matter where we go. Some might argue that, and say that its our ability to adapt any environment to suit our needs that is our greatest advantage, but that's a discussion for another day.
Now, knowing what you do about acclimation, realize that people often become numb to something if they experience it on a day-to-day basis. Which is part of where the "Heaven is Hell" mentality starts. Once again, though, that's a discussion for another day. What I'm saying is, that I've already acclimated to being insulted, being thought of as a monster. So really, if you want to make me feel bad about who I am... Well, to not beat around the bush, that's not gonna' do it.
Now, I'm really past the point of giving a flying fuck about preserving privacy. As any of you who regularly read my rants know, I rarely actually name/link-drop; unless I need to use that person as a specific example. In this case, I just don't care. For a few hours, I'm going to embrace the philosophy that posting something in a public format automatically mitigates any right to privacy you may have. Why? Who knows.
I suppose I'm just...not necessarily angry or irritated, but at my wits end. No, don't get me wrong. It isn't about the person's thoughts, or their beliefs, or even the fact that they're acting upon those beleifs. It's the fact that they went behind my back, and started talking shit. They didn't even have the balls to come to my face and say what they were thinking. Just that they were unwatching me. That kind of cowardice is one of the few things that really gets under my skin.
So, I'm sure you're all thinking, "Come On, Jynnx, stop beating around the bush; Let's dissect some stupidity already! That's what we're all waiting for!" Pushy bastards. Naw, I'm kidding. I love you people. <3
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/194445/
"I don't want to know about it.. I'm as open minded as the next furry but there are some things I don't want to know about, it came to my attention rather recently about a person who has things I wish I never knew."
Oh, Hells. Starting right off the bat with a logical fallacy. That's never a good sign. Alright, let's do this in a bulletin format, shall we? Oh, and, open-minded you say? I think not. Pft.
1. Nobody forced you to read anything I've ever made. My profile, submissions, or journals. No one's holding a gun to your head, saying that if you don't look at my art, they're going to blow your brains out. And if they are saying that, you would probably be better off letting them. That way your eyes don't burn out of your skull because of the ugliness. LAWLZ.
2. Okay, you don't want to know. That would be fine, but... I don't want to know a lot of things, myself. I didn't want to know that my biological father was more interested in why my mother was getting remarried, rather than asking about how I was doing. I didn't want to know that my best friend is the biggest closet homophobe. I didn't want to know that it had been my ineptitude that had killed my pet rabbits.
Are you really so self-centred that you think you're the only one in the whole world who's learned something he didn't want to know? Do you really think you're the only person in the whole world that stumbled across information that he didn't want stuck in his head? Egotistical fool.
DO YOU THINK YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW I WAS A PEDOPHILE!? ARE YOU THAT FUCKING ARROGANT? Do you really believe that I wanted to know that my heart beat for people I could never have. That my desires could burn and yearn for people I could never touch? Never kiss, never hold; not even forge romantic interests with? You don't even know what it feels like, you fucking idiot. You have no idea how much it tears at my heart to know that, even though I have never touched a kid, I'm automatically some evil monster because of my own thoughts? As if I can somehow control them. You don't know what it feels like to be told everyday of your life, that it's your fault for being weak enough to feel those thoughts. Like I can turn off sections of my brain at will.
Moving on.
"Maybe I should have read the userpage before putting them on watch, but I don't tend to do that as I'm lazy so its more my fault."
Gee, ya' think? *rolls eyes* There are so many things wrong with this statement... I don't even know where to start. Actually, nevermind. Yes, I do.
1. Going through my profile wouldn't have helped you, since I didn't put that it into the revisions after you'd watched me.
2. You say you're open-minded... But the very fact that you're willing to insult and condemn someone for something that they feel, but have never acted upon, proves that you are the real monster. It proves that you're only open-minded when it comes to things that you agree with. You don't even know what the word fucking means. Being open-minded has nothing to do with acceptance or tolernace, brat. It has everything to do with keeping your eyes open. With being able to discuss things openly, face to face, instead of running around people's backs, and try to learn something, you nitwit.
"I read a journal their journal then from there to their userpage, and to be honest I was sickened and appalled that they would openly admit such a thing."
Ah, yes. Because the mind is such a terrible thing to use.
"Yet I do not want to know if you are a pedo in real life, that's sick just sick and wrong thinking of children in that way who aren't even of legal age."
Really? Then why is it every reputable psychologist disagrees with you? Give me a link to a singe respected article or psychologist that says otherwise, and I might listen to you.
At any rate, the real point of quoting this part was as follows. Thoughts are inanimate. They cannot be good or bad, even if you believe in such a dichotomy. They cannot be positive or negative, they cannot be sick or healty. They are thoughts. They are neutral. Potential, not substance.
And yet... No one has once told me, no matter how many times I ask, what exactly one needs to understand about sex for it to be consensual, and not rape. No one has ever bothered to answer my question of what information is miracalously bestowed upon us the minute we hit 16 years of age, that we didn't know before. If you don't believe people under a certain age know what needs to be known, that's fine.
BUT DO NOT;
I REPEAT;
DO NOT;
MAKE FUCKING BLANKET STATEMENTS AND THINK YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH IT WITH ME.
If you want to argue that, then tell me what that information is, for fuck's sake! Tell the world, so you actually have some kind of logic from which to argue, rather than emotion and logical fallacies out the ass. D:< IT'S NOT THAT FUCKING HARD A QUESTION. WHY WILL YOU PEOPLE NOT ANSWER!?
"Get the fuck away from me."
But... NO.
JUST. FUCKING. NO.
YOU were the one who came to me. Sure I watched you first, but it was you who initiated actual communication. Don't even fucking go there.
"I also don't want to know that you want to fuck your dog or your horse or any kind of animal, that is the kind of shit that gives furrys a bad name."
Actually, no, it's people like you. People who are so obsessed with sex and porn, that they make a point out of putting that in their first impresions on people. Seriously, go look at this person's profile. What's right there? "I like porn."
It's also fursons who go out of their way to try and make different people feel unwelcome in the fandom. Why do you think so many potential newcomers turn away? It's not because they don't like the idea behind the fandom. It's because they don't like the execution; the people in it who have this abhorrent need to put themselves on a pedastal, and look down on others for any "slight" they can find.
And you have the gall to blame me? Seriously, WTF?
"Do you know how many people out there already think that we all go around fucking every four legged animal we can find?"
OH.
OOOOOOH.
OOOOHOHOHOHO.
NO YOU DIDN'T. YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT.
So, in your logic, I'm so supposed to pretend to be something I'm not... Supress myself... Lie not only to me, but everyone I care about...
So that you don't look bad!? FUCK THAT.
"So if you got unwatched and blocked by me and a friend of mine cos yes I told her, then its your own god damn fucking fault."
And, if you'd actually read my new profile, like you claim to have, you'd know that I don't give a fuck. If you can't accept people for people, no matter who or what they are...
Well, that's you loss. I don't need "friends" like that. I already have real friends who accept me in my totality. Lovers who are willing to let me touch them, even though they know what I am.
And that...
You are an arrogant, pompous, fool if you think anything you can do or say can take that happiness from me. Don't even bother trying.
On a...less retorting note...
I'VE OPENLY ADMITED MY PEDOPHILIA NO LESS THAN EIGHT TIMES. EIGHT.
And that's just the one's I could find. You were watching me for most of them. And now you're raising a stink about it? You wait until after I've finally started learning to open myself to the public, until after I mention that I have people who care for me unconditionally, to try and cause problems?
Well, you did cause problems. You did cause drama. But somehow, I think, if you ever read this, you'll realize it's not problems for me.
It's problems, for you.
Lastly, and this applies to everyone (except my lovers and actual friends; you can ignore this warning and do it anyway, and not suffer my wrath. Yes, I play favorites.). DO NOT. FUCK. WITH ME. If you have an issue with me, have the balls to bring it up, to me. Do NOT go around my back, whispering behind me, thinking I'm not gonna' find out.
Do not think, for a second, that you can play this game with me. I guarantee you, you can't play it on my level.
Lastly...
I'm sorry for wasting everyone's time; those of you who actually read this. Feel free to forget you ever bothered. I'm just venting, 'cause I'm pissed. Take it as seriously, or as unseriously, as you desire. And feel free to ask me quesionts. My rants are always open to comment. Trolling and flaming? No. Discussion and education?
Yes.
(PS... Am I ED worthy yet? >_< )
[Quiz] The Wold Is Ending...
Posted 18 years ago...Did I leave the oven on? Oh damn.
So, I'm bored. I've been toying with an idea for a post and, obviously, decided to go through with it.
Don't worry, Sensei, it's not that.
Anyway.
The world is ending. Through whatever means, you've been given the power to save one thing about it.
What would you save, and why?
So, I'm bored. I've been toying with an idea for a post and, obviously, decided to go through with it.
Don't worry, Sensei, it's not that.
Anyway.
The world is ending. Through whatever means, you've been given the power to save one thing about it.
What would you save, and why?
On Family, Friends and Lovers
Posted 18 years agoWhere to start. Well, I guess I'll start with my relationship. Now, I've made no attempt to hide the fact that I'm a pedophile. By all Hells, I've said it enough times over on FA; it's even displayed right there on my artist's profile!
In the very few relationships I've ever had that I felt could actually go somewhere, that has been the most important point of contetion. The making or breaking point, as it were, to feed my inherent love of cliche. Unfortunately, I live in a part of the world where anything uncommon is considered to be unnatural. And anything unnatural, is wrong. Besides, who wants to be involved with a nasty, dirty, sick pedo? He's just using you to get at your younger sister or brother, after all! Right? *bitter laugh*
Oh, I kill myself sometimes. :roll:
Anyway, getting to the point. Obviously, I am both very afraid of, and very driven to, the point of bringing it up with whoever my SO('s) may/might be. Driven in the sense that, I realize that it is something that must be discussed if the relationship is going to mean anything. But afraid of being shown just how conditional love can really be these days.
So you can imagine how I felt when I realized that it was time to bring these things up with blueskyiies and Shin Maverick. To describe it seems almost impossible, but I will try.
First, think of that light, hallow feeling you get when you think about the person you love. That warm burning that courses through your veins, accompanied by the fluttering deep within your gut. But, imagine that there's a darker aspect to it; something acidic and undesirable. As if it were a very sour candy, coated with a sweet shelll; but this candy, you can't just put down and walk away from. What was that darker feeling, though? I suppose...terror. Seething self-loathing. Terror that I was about to alienate the two best things that have ever happened to me; terror that words like "monster," and "pervert" would stream from their lips readily enough. From most people, that would mean very little to me. After almost 4 years of it, you get used to being thought of only as the sick individual. But if those things should ever come for me, from them...
But one might ask, "It wasn't just terror you mentioned. You also said something about self-loathing. What about that?" Look into your past. Has there ever been anything about you that you hated so much, that burning disgust boiled your blood everytime you thought about it? Well, that's pretty much how it is with me, being a pedophile. But it isn't because I am a pedophile; that would be like hating myself because I'm a half-breed (IRL), or because I'm pansexual, or because I'd rather spend my time theorizing, rather than practicing. It's because of all the things associated with it. It's because I can love this group of people, but I can't do anything about it. Do you have any idea how maddening that can get? To be forced to stand by the sidelines, keeping everything about yourself squashed down into the darkest, dankest recess of your fetid heart you can find?
But it's more than that. Almost everyone around me takes great delight in trying to hurt me, slinging words like, "sicko," "abomination," "evil, twisted freak". All because of what I am, because of my thoughts alone. Yet the fact that I have done nothing to act upon those thoughts is, to these people...trivial information, at best. The fact that I spend every moment I can trying to help the people around me, despite every one of my outward declarations that I despise other people and their bullshit, is apparently just "cover". Me trying to "cover" the inherent evil of what I am, so that I can somehow manage to do things to little kids while no one's watching.
Now, some of you know how I personally feel about pedophilia, and what I think when it comes to the issue of consent. Well, three of you. Anyway, don't even get me started on what happens when that comes up. Then I stop being the evil monster, and the poor, deluded child who doesn't know enough about the world to know any better. As if. I could kick anyone's ass in a debate, hands-tied-the-Hells-down. But that's beside the point.
Moving on. Now that you've been flooded with barely relevant emoness, I'll get to what I'm trying to say. Well, I finally felt like in my relationship with blue and Maverick, like it was time to discuss that. perhaps I jumped the gun with Mae, because we've only known each other for about a month or two, but that bond of explicit trust has formed, at least on my side, that I share with Corey. In his case, I took a little longer than usual. This december, we'll have been together for about a year and a half. Granted, I asked them individually. Heh... I'm not that brave, people. XP
So I brought it up. First, since we are all furries, I kept it to that medium, asking questions like, "Is it an issue with you that I'm into cub stuff," and, "Is it an issue that I write it?" Once I'd gotten a no from them on both issues, I asked them something along the lines of, "Is it, or will it ever be, an issue that I publically acknowledge my belief that from age 11+, the act of having sex itself should not be a crime?" Well, for better or for worse, the answer from both of them was a variet of no. Effectively, they both said that they agree that it should be handled on a case-by-case basis; just like usual relationships are. Though, not necessarily in that many, or those specific, words.
Tch. One more hurdle passed. Only a lifetime's worth of more to go.
But, that was just on the Lovers part. You might be wondering, "Jynnx, you silly Unimouse, what about the friends and family part?"
Well, I posted a journal entry on FA a while ago. It dealt with a certain...defect of mine. I'm not going to go back into it now. It's not something I really like to talk about necessarily, and the entry is still there on FA if you're really that stalkerific. XD
But, getting serious. Sensei was one of those who I talked with about. And, the fact that she actually cares strikes me as funny, and odd. But, that sounds a little off, so let me delve a bit deeper into explaination.
On the first layer, it strikes me as funny. This is because, in my experience, people usually don't tend to care about me unless they're looking out for their next good fuck, if you'll forgive my crassness. Sure, I've got a circle of very close friends (and now blue and Maverick), who actively care without the desire to get into my pants, but they are a minority. So, the idea that someone can actually care out of concern and not be looking out for their sexual gratification is...not new, but alien to me.
On the second layer, a glaring problem with this strikes me as odd. It's the fact that... Someone I have never met in person, someone I have only begun talking wither over the last week or so (albeit, at great length), cares more about the situation then... My actual family. Especially my mother.
I don't know how many of you know this, but there is no love for me to lose when it comes to my mother. Long ago, she made it crystal clear that the only one she's really worried about is herself. As long as whatever I'm doing or going through won't come back to reflect negatively on her, both as a parent and a person, she couldn't care less. And that's not simple teenage angst talking, that's the truth. She's even said it aloud, though I don't think she knows I picked up on it. What I'm trying to say is, unless it can come back to bite her in the ass, I'm pretty much left to deal with my problems on my own.
I always hear shit like, "Blood is thicker than water." "You can trust in your family, for anything." Then, if that's the case, my mother needs to be put in the Guiness book of World Records for being the first women to biologically conceive and give birth to her adoptive child.
*shakes head*
Oh well. Only a year or two more of this two-faced crap, pretending to get along when I really can't stand her, and then everything will be so much better.
Pft. I'm done now.
No Love for the World,
Jynnx, the Unimouse.
In the very few relationships I've ever had that I felt could actually go somewhere, that has been the most important point of contetion. The making or breaking point, as it were, to feed my inherent love of cliche. Unfortunately, I live in a part of the world where anything uncommon is considered to be unnatural. And anything unnatural, is wrong. Besides, who wants to be involved with a nasty, dirty, sick pedo? He's just using you to get at your younger sister or brother, after all! Right? *bitter laugh*
Oh, I kill myself sometimes. :roll:
Anyway, getting to the point. Obviously, I am both very afraid of, and very driven to, the point of bringing it up with whoever my SO('s) may/might be. Driven in the sense that, I realize that it is something that must be discussed if the relationship is going to mean anything. But afraid of being shown just how conditional love can really be these days.
So you can imagine how I felt when I realized that it was time to bring these things up with blueskyiies and Shin Maverick. To describe it seems almost impossible, but I will try.
First, think of that light, hallow feeling you get when you think about the person you love. That warm burning that courses through your veins, accompanied by the fluttering deep within your gut. But, imagine that there's a darker aspect to it; something acidic and undesirable. As if it were a very sour candy, coated with a sweet shelll; but this candy, you can't just put down and walk away from. What was that darker feeling, though? I suppose...terror. Seething self-loathing. Terror that I was about to alienate the two best things that have ever happened to me; terror that words like "monster," and "pervert" would stream from their lips readily enough. From most people, that would mean very little to me. After almost 4 years of it, you get used to being thought of only as the sick individual. But if those things should ever come for me, from them...
But one might ask, "It wasn't just terror you mentioned. You also said something about self-loathing. What about that?" Look into your past. Has there ever been anything about you that you hated so much, that burning disgust boiled your blood everytime you thought about it? Well, that's pretty much how it is with me, being a pedophile. But it isn't because I am a pedophile; that would be like hating myself because I'm a half-breed (IRL), or because I'm pansexual, or because I'd rather spend my time theorizing, rather than practicing. It's because of all the things associated with it. It's because I can love this group of people, but I can't do anything about it. Do you have any idea how maddening that can get? To be forced to stand by the sidelines, keeping everything about yourself squashed down into the darkest, dankest recess of your fetid heart you can find?
But it's more than that. Almost everyone around me takes great delight in trying to hurt me, slinging words like, "sicko," "abomination," "evil, twisted freak". All because of what I am, because of my thoughts alone. Yet the fact that I have done nothing to act upon those thoughts is, to these people...trivial information, at best. The fact that I spend every moment I can trying to help the people around me, despite every one of my outward declarations that I despise other people and their bullshit, is apparently just "cover". Me trying to "cover" the inherent evil of what I am, so that I can somehow manage to do things to little kids while no one's watching.
Now, some of you know how I personally feel about pedophilia, and what I think when it comes to the issue of consent. Well, three of you. Anyway, don't even get me started on what happens when that comes up. Then I stop being the evil monster, and the poor, deluded child who doesn't know enough about the world to know any better. As if. I could kick anyone's ass in a debate, hands-tied-the-Hells-down. But that's beside the point.
Moving on. Now that you've been flooded with barely relevant emoness, I'll get to what I'm trying to say. Well, I finally felt like in my relationship with blue and Maverick, like it was time to discuss that. perhaps I jumped the gun with Mae, because we've only known each other for about a month or two, but that bond of explicit trust has formed, at least on my side, that I share with Corey. In his case, I took a little longer than usual. This december, we'll have been together for about a year and a half. Granted, I asked them individually. Heh... I'm not that brave, people. XP
So I brought it up. First, since we are all furries, I kept it to that medium, asking questions like, "Is it an issue with you that I'm into cub stuff," and, "Is it an issue that I write it?" Once I'd gotten a no from them on both issues, I asked them something along the lines of, "Is it, or will it ever be, an issue that I publically acknowledge my belief that from age 11+, the act of having sex itself should not be a crime?" Well, for better or for worse, the answer from both of them was a variet of no. Effectively, they both said that they agree that it should be handled on a case-by-case basis; just like usual relationships are. Though, not necessarily in that many, or those specific, words.
Tch. One more hurdle passed. Only a lifetime's worth of more to go.
But, that was just on the Lovers part. You might be wondering, "Jynnx, you silly Unimouse, what about the friends and family part?"
Well, I posted a journal entry on FA a while ago. It dealt with a certain...defect of mine. I'm not going to go back into it now. It's not something I really like to talk about necessarily, and the entry is still there on FA if you're really that stalkerific. XD
But, getting serious. Sensei was one of those who I talked with about. And, the fact that she actually cares strikes me as funny, and odd. But, that sounds a little off, so let me delve a bit deeper into explaination.
On the first layer, it strikes me as funny. This is because, in my experience, people usually don't tend to care about me unless they're looking out for their next good fuck, if you'll forgive my crassness. Sure, I've got a circle of very close friends (and now blue and Maverick), who actively care without the desire to get into my pants, but they are a minority. So, the idea that someone can actually care out of concern and not be looking out for their sexual gratification is...not new, but alien to me.
On the second layer, a glaring problem with this strikes me as odd. It's the fact that... Someone I have never met in person, someone I have only begun talking wither over the last week or so (albeit, at great length), cares more about the situation then... My actual family. Especially my mother.
I don't know how many of you know this, but there is no love for me to lose when it comes to my mother. Long ago, she made it crystal clear that the only one she's really worried about is herself. As long as whatever I'm doing or going through won't come back to reflect negatively on her, both as a parent and a person, she couldn't care less. And that's not simple teenage angst talking, that's the truth. She's even said it aloud, though I don't think she knows I picked up on it. What I'm trying to say is, unless it can come back to bite her in the ass, I'm pretty much left to deal with my problems on my own.
I always hear shit like, "Blood is thicker than water." "You can trust in your family, for anything." Then, if that's the case, my mother needs to be put in the Guiness book of World Records for being the first women to biologically conceive and give birth to her adoptive child.
*shakes head*
Oh well. Only a year or two more of this two-faced crap, pretending to get along when I really can't stand her, and then everything will be so much better.
Pft. I'm done now.
No Love for the World,
Jynnx, the Unimouse.
Subway and Toads
Posted 18 years agoOMG
Greatest. Mock. Commercial. Idea. Ever.
Chick walks into her house, and hears weird moans coming from upstairs. She goes to check it out, and finds her husband cheating on her with a high schooler. She, obviously, gets all pissy with him, but he responds with;
"Baby, it's okay! I had subway for lunch!"
And then he promptly gets thrown out the window. And then wife and high school girl live happily ever after, having hot lesbian sex every night. ^^
In other news;
BY THE GODS, TOADS ARE SO DAMN CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I want one. <3
I was over at my grandmothers', helping them move furniture out of their basement after the major flood we had last weekend, and on my way back stairs from taking something out to the curb, I picked up this toad that had been sitting in the window.
And the too-damn-cute-bastard just sat there in my hand, breathing at me. I fell in love. Again.
Greatest. Mock. Commercial. Idea. Ever.
Chick walks into her house, and hears weird moans coming from upstairs. She goes to check it out, and finds her husband cheating on her with a high schooler. She, obviously, gets all pissy with him, but he responds with;
"Baby, it's okay! I had subway for lunch!"
And then he promptly gets thrown out the window. And then wife and high school girl live happily ever after, having hot lesbian sex every night. ^^
In other news;
BY THE GODS, TOADS ARE SO DAMN CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I want one. <3
I was over at my grandmothers', helping them move furniture out of their basement after the major flood we had last weekend, and on my way back stairs from taking something out to the curb, I picked up this toad that had been sitting in the window.
And the too-damn-cute-bastard just sat there in my hand, breathing at me. I fell in love. Again.
A Truth About Me
Posted 18 years agoI've come to terms with the fact that I am a proud Transvestite the other day.
GIVE ME YOUR FEMAN CLOTHING. D:<
I'll model it for you. =^_^=
Loves a Bunches,
Jynnx.
<3
GIVE ME YOUR FEMAN CLOTHING. D:<
I'll model it for you. =^_^=
Loves a Bunches,
Jynnx.
<3
Everyone Look Here!
Posted 18 years agohttp://www.furaffinity.net/view/747454/
This beautiful abstract piece was done for my by the wonderful
katalina .
You should go check out her account, too. She's a wonderfully sweet person, and her abstract works and colorations are simply to die for. And that's not just personal bias talking. Don't believe me? Go look.
katalina
This beautiful abstract piece was done for my by the wonderful
katalina .You should go check out her account, too. She's a wonderfully sweet person, and her abstract works and colorations are simply to die for. And that's not just personal bias talking. Don't believe me? Go look.
katalinaFursona Character Sheet; Edited
Posted 18 years agoI realized... Only after uploading the charcter sheet...
That despite the fact that I decided Jynnx is a Unimouse...
I didn't describe his horn.
>_<
That error has now been fixed.
That despite the fact that I decided Jynnx is a Unimouse...
I didn't describe his horn.
>_<
That error has now been fixed.
Jynnx, My New Fursona; Now in .txt and .rtf
Posted 18 years agoI just uploaded the .rtf and .txt versions of Jynnx's character sheet.
For best viewing capability with the .txt version, download it and then open it in Note Pad; with Word Wrap activated.
For best viewing capability with the .txt version, download it and then open it in Note Pad; with Word Wrap activated.
NEW FURSONA; Posted
Posted 18 years agoThere we go. Jynnx, my new Fursona, has his character sheet in my scraps. ^^
NEW FURSONA.
Posted 18 years agoYup, that's right. I'm designing a new fursona. I'm really kind of tired of playing the world-hating, emo-angsty, can't-get-over-my-past jackass that is WolfDog.
I'm moving onto...
Well, you'll have to wait and see. >:3
I'll be posting the character sheet in my scraps, when I'm done. I might post another journal to anoune his arrival.
But,
blueskyiies already knows about it. I wanted to tell 
maverickk , but his power kept shorting out. I never got the chance. :(
But, yes, that means, no more wolfy The_Last_Sibling. I'll be something different and, in my oppinion, better for me, emotionally.
I'm moving onto...
Well, you'll have to wait and see. >:3
I'll be posting the character sheet in my scraps, when I'm done. I might post another journal to anoune his arrival.
But,
blueskyiies already knows about it. I wanted to tell 
maverickk , but his power kept shorting out. I never got the chance. :(But, yes, that means, no more wolfy The_Last_Sibling. I'll be something different and, in my oppinion, better for me, emotionally.
Daniel's Rant V: Hypospadia (TMI, but Personal)
Posted 18 years agoHypospadia.
A congenital penile defect, in which the urethra does not fully extend through the glands of the penis during formation in the womb. Rather, a homornal imbalance (Gee, I seem to have a lot of those, actually... :| ) prevents natural development of the sexual organs, and the urethra will bend downwards and can open anywhere on the bottom of the penis. This defect usually occurs in 1 of every 150 to 300 males; depending on the source of your statistic.
The most direct problem of this defect is a hinderence in urination. Because of the mutated shape and size of the urethra's opening, urine passage is obstructed. It can be very hard to effectively urinate, or it comes out as a flat, wide spray rather than a controllable stream. However, in more severe cases, it also creates a downward bend in the penis as a whole; which can, later in life, obstruct one's ability to grow an effective erection. This is a condition known as Chordee. Additionally, it can also lead to complications with Pseudohermaphroditism, which in turn severely dents growth of the penis, testicles and scrotum during puberty. In my case, I managed to avoid the Chordee. I did not, however, have enough Cosmic Stock at the time to avoid the Pseudohermaphroditism.
The Hypospadia itself can be cured, with reconstructive surgery. This surgery comes in various forms; some are one-shot deals, that last anywhere from ninety minutes to three hours. Other forms of this surgery occur in a series of steps. Usually, a catheder is applied during the end of the surgery, as many doctors/surgeons prefer that patients not urinate until the surgery fully heals. However, the healing process itself, as with all invasive medical procedures, is open to it's own complications. This surgery involves reconstructing the urethra passage, and various amounts of the penis itself, depending on how far back the original opening opened. If scar tissue forms inside the reconstructions...
The amount of follow-up visits one will have to do, after the surgery, varies from doctor to doctor.
*sighs*
Why. Does all the defective shit. Happen. To me?
But who wants to hear the real kicker?
This corrective surgery is usually pressed by doctors/surgeons to be done within the first three years of life.
And yet... Here I am, almost 18. AND. IT. WAS. NEVER. CORRECTED.
And my mother knows about it to (well, I'd hope she would...considering it's a "From Birth" thing...). The doctors told her what she needed to do. And she didn't do it.
Wonderful way to drop the ball there, bitch. Yet again, you leave me to deal with my problems alone. THANKS. SO FUCKING MUCH.
>_<
A congenital penile defect, in which the urethra does not fully extend through the glands of the penis during formation in the womb. Rather, a homornal imbalance (Gee, I seem to have a lot of those, actually... :| ) prevents natural development of the sexual organs, and the urethra will bend downwards and can open anywhere on the bottom of the penis. This defect usually occurs in 1 of every 150 to 300 males; depending on the source of your statistic.
The most direct problem of this defect is a hinderence in urination. Because of the mutated shape and size of the urethra's opening, urine passage is obstructed. It can be very hard to effectively urinate, or it comes out as a flat, wide spray rather than a controllable stream. However, in more severe cases, it also creates a downward bend in the penis as a whole; which can, later in life, obstruct one's ability to grow an effective erection. This is a condition known as Chordee. Additionally, it can also lead to complications with Pseudohermaphroditism, which in turn severely dents growth of the penis, testicles and scrotum during puberty. In my case, I managed to avoid the Chordee. I did not, however, have enough Cosmic Stock at the time to avoid the Pseudohermaphroditism.
The Hypospadia itself can be cured, with reconstructive surgery. This surgery comes in various forms; some are one-shot deals, that last anywhere from ninety minutes to three hours. Other forms of this surgery occur in a series of steps. Usually, a catheder is applied during the end of the surgery, as many doctors/surgeons prefer that patients not urinate until the surgery fully heals. However, the healing process itself, as with all invasive medical procedures, is open to it's own complications. This surgery involves reconstructing the urethra passage, and various amounts of the penis itself, depending on how far back the original opening opened. If scar tissue forms inside the reconstructions...
The amount of follow-up visits one will have to do, after the surgery, varies from doctor to doctor.
*sighs*
Why. Does all the defective shit. Happen. To me?
But who wants to hear the real kicker?
This corrective surgery is usually pressed by doctors/surgeons to be done within the first three years of life.
And yet... Here I am, almost 18. AND. IT. WAS. NEVER. CORRECTED.
And my mother knows about it to (well, I'd hope she would...considering it's a "From Birth" thing...). The doctors told her what she needed to do. And she didn't do it.
Wonderful way to drop the ball there, bitch. Yet again, you leave me to deal with my problems alone. THANKS. SO FUCKING MUCH.
>_<
I Want To Get To Know YOU.
Posted 18 years agoOkie, here it goes. A list of twenty different topics is provided. Tell me what you think about each subject, in as much or as little depth as you want. Feel free to post this in your own journals, too.
1. Love
2. Wisdom
3. Positive vs. Negative emotions
4. War and Conflict
5. Tolerance
6. Power and Influence
7. Fun
8. Sucess
9. Losing Sight of One's Ideals
10. The Point of Life
11. Betrayal
12. Dreaming and the Imagination
13. Deviant Love and Sex
14. Money
15. Faith
16. Becoming Corrupted
17. Apathy
18. Freedom, Rights and Personal Choice
19. The Nature of Corruption
20. Morality
1. Love
2. Wisdom
3. Positive vs. Negative emotions
4. War and Conflict
5. Tolerance
6. Power and Influence
7. Fun
8. Sucess
9. Losing Sight of One's Ideals
10. The Point of Life
11. Betrayal
12. Dreaming and the Imagination
13. Deviant Love and Sex
14. Money
15. Faith
16. Becoming Corrupted
17. Apathy
18. Freedom, Rights and Personal Choice
19. The Nature of Corruption
20. Morality
Furries Must Equal Anti-Mother
Posted 18 years agoYou all already know how much I loathe my own mother, so you know this isn't supposed to be a dis-journal or something.
But has anyone else noticed the sheer, staggering statistic in regards to how many furries have real issues with their mothers, like me?
I mean, almost everyone I know who has such issues...
Is a Furrie.
Is there some kind of unwritten Furrie Law that states, "Chances are, you're gonna hate your mom"?
But has anyone else noticed the sheer, staggering statistic in regards to how many furries have real issues with their mothers, like me?
I mean, almost everyone I know who has such issues...
Is a Furrie.
Is there some kind of unwritten Furrie Law that states, "Chances are, you're gonna hate your mom"?
Apparently My City Has Made National News.
Posted 18 years agoI've been told that Findlay, Ohio has made news all over the country, for having flooded.
Yes, that's right. We've flooded. The whole city.
All the main streets were closed; I don't know if they still are or not.
My own house almost floated away from the bottom up. The basement really took on water. Like, five feet of water. In an area the size of a small business waiting room. That's a lot of water. After two hours of pumping it out, we've gone down about half a foot. *sighs*
Oh well. At least I'm still here. And we didn't have to start trying to lug all the important shit up those steps to the second floor. Pft.
Of course, the Blanchard isn't supposed to stop cresting until 2 PM today. And it's supposed to keep raining all day, like it has been for the last TWO days, until Thursday...
Help. >_>
Yes, that's right. We've flooded. The whole city.
All the main streets were closed; I don't know if they still are or not.
My own house almost floated away from the bottom up. The basement really took on water. Like, five feet of water. In an area the size of a small business waiting room. That's a lot of water. After two hours of pumping it out, we've gone down about half a foot. *sighs*
Oh well. At least I'm still here. And we didn't have to start trying to lug all the important shit up those steps to the second floor. Pft.
Of course, the Blanchard isn't supposed to stop cresting until 2 PM today. And it's supposed to keep raining all day, like it has been for the last TWO days, until Thursday...
Help. >_>
Adult Works To Be Uploaded
Posted 18 years agoOnce I can start uploading adult works, without getting my account deactivated, there are a few things I hope to have finished by then. This is a list of what I'm working on now.
Mariette: OH MY GODS, IT'S A HUMAN STORY! D: Mariette is about Mariette's, a young human child, (suprisingly enough) life. She is engaged to a prince (one of those arranged marriages things) that has two personalities. One of them is kind ruler, while the other is a tyrannical madman who will accept nothing short of total world dominion. She is rescued by one of the last Mages, magick-wielding men and women of fearsome power. They came to her world ages ago; some as would-be conquerers, others as saviors and protectors. Now those who stayed behind while their kin left have reawoke, and intend on finishing their civil war.
A Master's Key: A horse anthro, a mage, buys a male slave to train in the ways of magick before he dies. However, being the kind soul that he is, he listens to his new acquisition's pleas to buy the human girl that he'd been held captive with as well, so they wouldn't have to be seperated. However, the mage's (evil) twin brother, seeing that his kinder twin is about to do this, snatches her up first. Of course, being a human hater, he is disgusted by her mere existence and uses her for forced sexual release. The kind twin and his apprentice go about rescuing her.
WolfDog's Rose: This is another story featuring my main Original Character, WolfDog. In this one, he is the headmaster of a school dedicated to helping the Gifted; humans and anthroes who can tap into special powers. Some are in control of Magickal forces, others Spiritual, and the rest Psionic. The point of this story is the unfolding passionate romance between WolfDog and one of the more docile students. And to think, it all starts in a bathroom...
The Daughter Who Wasn't a Son: This story takes place in alternate-reality-future-Earth. An insane political leader, unable to accept the fact that the only child he will ever have is female, spirits his offspring to a political prison, hoping to forget about her. This story deals with the romance between her and another inmate.
Mariette: OH MY GODS, IT'S A HUMAN STORY! D: Mariette is about Mariette's, a young human child, (suprisingly enough) life. She is engaged to a prince (one of those arranged marriages things) that has two personalities. One of them is kind ruler, while the other is a tyrannical madman who will accept nothing short of total world dominion. She is rescued by one of the last Mages, magick-wielding men and women of fearsome power. They came to her world ages ago; some as would-be conquerers, others as saviors and protectors. Now those who stayed behind while their kin left have reawoke, and intend on finishing their civil war.
A Master's Key: A horse anthro, a mage, buys a male slave to train in the ways of magick before he dies. However, being the kind soul that he is, he listens to his new acquisition's pleas to buy the human girl that he'd been held captive with as well, so they wouldn't have to be seperated. However, the mage's (evil) twin brother, seeing that his kinder twin is about to do this, snatches her up first. Of course, being a human hater, he is disgusted by her mere existence and uses her for forced sexual release. The kind twin and his apprentice go about rescuing her.
WolfDog's Rose: This is another story featuring my main Original Character, WolfDog. In this one, he is the headmaster of a school dedicated to helping the Gifted; humans and anthroes who can tap into special powers. Some are in control of Magickal forces, others Spiritual, and the rest Psionic. The point of this story is the unfolding passionate romance between WolfDog and one of the more docile students. And to think, it all starts in a bathroom...
The Daughter Who Wasn't a Son: This story takes place in alternate-reality-future-Earth. An insane political leader, unable to accept the fact that the only child he will ever have is female, spirits his offspring to a political prison, hoping to forget about her. This story deals with the romance between her and another inmate.
Tagged.
Posted 18 years agoTagged by :icon Sarn:
Alright, six things that are weird habits, or I hate, about myself.
1. I always have to eat the toppings on my pizza off first, leaving the sauce and crust for last.
2. I have a tendancy to say things as they come to mind, before taking the extra time to think about them first.
3. If I haven't done at least an iota of work on any of my personal projects, I feel the whole day has been a waste, no matter what else I've accomplished.
4. I can be very apathetic when it comes to other people's drama, bullshit and problems. I have enough of my own, that I tend to give everyone but a select few the cold shoulder without even realizing it.
5. I am my worst critic. Nothing I ever do is good enough for me, and I can spend all day picking apart my faults; even if I have to start making them up after a while.
6. Although I have a wide taste for music, whenever I heart a song, I either love it or hate it; within the first five seconds, usually.
BUT I'M SUCH A RULE BREAKER. NO MORE TAGS FOR YOU! HAHA.
Alright, six things that are weird habits, or I hate, about myself.
1. I always have to eat the toppings on my pizza off first, leaving the sauce and crust for last.
2. I have a tendancy to say things as they come to mind, before taking the extra time to think about them first.
3. If I haven't done at least an iota of work on any of my personal projects, I feel the whole day has been a waste, no matter what else I've accomplished.
4. I can be very apathetic when it comes to other people's drama, bullshit and problems. I have enough of my own, that I tend to give everyone but a select few the cold shoulder without even realizing it.
5. I am my worst critic. Nothing I ever do is good enough for me, and I can spend all day picking apart my faults; even if I have to start making them up after a while.
6. Although I have a wide taste for music, whenever I heart a song, I either love it or hate it; within the first five seconds, usually.
BUT I'M SUCH A RULE BREAKER. NO MORE TAGS FOR YOU! HAHA.
Tell Me What You Think Of Me; No Holds Barred
Posted 18 years agoI'm bored, and in some serious need of an emotional ass-kicking, if you've got it.
So go ahead. Tell me what you really think of me. Don't hold anything back. Be completely honest. If you like me, that's fine; but tell me why you like me.
Is there anything you'd change about me if you could? What is it, and why? Or, on the flip side, is there anything about me you'd fight to protect/preserve? Why would you do that then?
Is there anything you'd like to say to me? Any questions you have about me? Say it. Ask away.
And anything else you might think of on this matter.
Go get your friends, assuming they know me, and I know them, and have them play along to.
So go ahead. Tell me what you really think of me. Don't hold anything back. Be completely honest. If you like me, that's fine; but tell me why you like me.
Is there anything you'd change about me if you could? What is it, and why? Or, on the flip side, is there anything about me you'd fight to protect/preserve? Why would you do that then?
Is there anything you'd like to say to me? Any questions you have about me? Say it. Ask away.
And anything else you might think of on this matter.
Go get your friends, assuming they know me, and I know them, and have them play along to.
A Master's Key; My Kinks, Revised
Posted 18 years agoA long time ago I decided to take the 100 themes challange. I never actually did anything with it. Originally, I was going to use it to write the 600 year period of Yondarah's history that was "missing" in the history books. Then, after I decided that that period of time wasn't going to be 600 years, I decided I was going to use it to write Sebastian's story.
Now I've decided to use it for an entirely new creation, called A Master's Key. The basic premise is that a Horse mage buys a male slave, to train in the ways of magick before he dies. However, being the kind soul that he is, he listens to his new acquisition's pleas to buy the human girl that he'd been held captive with as well, so they wouldn't have to be seperated. However, the mage's (evil) twin brother, seeing that his kinder twin is about to do this, snatches her up first. Of course, being a human hater, he is disgusted by her mere existence and uses her for forced sexual release. The kind twin and his apprentice go about rescuing her.
Guide:
+++ HELL YES!
++ Yes please.
+ Hot.
= No Oppionion.
- Not my cup of tea.
-- I'll...pass...
--- No. No. No, no, no. No.
Ageplay (+++)
Age Regression (++)
Anal (++)
Asphyxiation (+)
Babyfur (---)
Bandages (=)
Bestiality (+++)
Biting (+)
Blood (--)
Bondage (+)
Breasts (++)
Breast Expansion (=)
Bukake (+)
Cheesecake (+)
Cross-Breeding (++)
Cross-Dressing (++)
Cute (+)
Domming (=)
Effeminite Boys (++)
Fat (-)
Foot/Paw (---)
Fur (+)
Glasses (+)
Hair (+)
Herm (+++)
Human (+)
Impregnation (=)
Incest (+++)
Inflation (--)
Lactation (++)
Latex (---)
Leather (-)
Macro (+)
Masks (---)
Medical (+)
Micro (+)
Mind Control (+)
Multiple Parts (+)
Muscle *Female (---)
Muscle *Male (--)
Oral (++)
Orgy (++)
Intergenerational/Loli/Shota (+++)
Pregnancy (++)
Rape (+)
Scat (---)
She-males (++)
Shoe/Boots (=)
Solo Masturbation (+)
Stockings (=)
Straight (++)
Subbing (+++)
Suit and Tie (=)
Technological (=)
Tentacles (++)
Transformation (=)
Uniform (-)
Vomit (---)
Vore (--)
Watersports (---)
Yaoi (+++)
Yuri (+++)
Now I've decided to use it for an entirely new creation, called A Master's Key. The basic premise is that a Horse mage buys a male slave, to train in the ways of magick before he dies. However, being the kind soul that he is, he listens to his new acquisition's pleas to buy the human girl that he'd been held captive with as well, so they wouldn't have to be seperated. However, the mage's (evil) twin brother, seeing that his kinder twin is about to do this, snatches her up first. Of course, being a human hater, he is disgusted by her mere existence and uses her for forced sexual release. The kind twin and his apprentice go about rescuing her.
Guide:
+++ HELL YES!
++ Yes please.
+ Hot.
= No Oppionion.
- Not my cup of tea.
-- I'll...pass...
--- No. No. No, no, no. No.
Ageplay (+++)
Age Regression (++)
Anal (++)
Asphyxiation (+)
Babyfur (---)
Bandages (=)
Bestiality (+++)
Biting (+)
Blood (--)
Bondage (+)
Breasts (++)
Breast Expansion (=)
Bukake (+)
Cheesecake (+)
Cross-Breeding (++)
Cross-Dressing (++)
Cute (+)
Domming (=)
Effeminite Boys (++)
Fat (-)
Foot/Paw (---)
Fur (+)
Glasses (+)
Hair (+)
Herm (+++)
Human (+)
Impregnation (=)
Incest (+++)
Inflation (--)
Lactation (++)
Latex (---)
Leather (-)
Macro (+)
Masks (---)
Medical (+)
Micro (+)
Mind Control (+)
Multiple Parts (+)
Muscle *Female (---)
Muscle *Male (--)
Oral (++)
Orgy (++)
Intergenerational/Loli/Shota (+++)
Pregnancy (++)
Rape (+)
Scat (---)
She-males (++)
Shoe/Boots (=)
Solo Masturbation (+)
Stockings (=)
Straight (++)
Subbing (+++)
Suit and Tie (=)
Technological (=)
Tentacles (++)
Transformation (=)
Uniform (-)
Vomit (---)
Vore (--)
Watersports (---)
Yaoi (+++)
Yuri (+++)
I have a Master, I have a Master!
Posted 18 years ago^^
Oh my, I'm so gidddy this morning! Hehe! As of 10:50 PM last night, Eastern Standard Time (lol), I have become maverickk 's mate and Pet.
...
Gods, I cannot begin to articulate how happy this makes me! ^^ Most of you may not realize it, because I don't particularly act like it, but I am a very submissive creature with my lovers... I love being topped, dommed, etc. ;) So, oh yes, my heart is racing.
^^
Oh my, I'm so gidddy this morning! Hehe! As of 10:50 PM last night, Eastern Standard Time (lol), I have become
maverickk 's mate and Pet....
Gods, I cannot begin to articulate how happy this makes me! ^^ Most of you may not realize it, because I don't particularly act like it, but I am a very submissive creature with my lovers... I love being topped, dommed, etc. ;) So, oh yes, my heart is racing.
^^
...I think I have a new Fetish...
Posted 18 years agoIt has occured to me today, that I have a very big soft spot in my heart for pregnent furs... >_>
The kind of "soft spot" that causes a "hard reaction" if you know what I mean. >_>
Mind you, it only applies to furries, scalies and what have you. Not humans. I don't think pregnant humans are all that attractive. Sorry. Yes, I know, I'm a speciesist. lol.
Anyway... Just thought I'd put that out there... Actually, I think it may be time to update my Fetish List and repost it...
The kind of "soft spot" that causes a "hard reaction" if you know what I mean. >_>
Mind you, it only applies to furries, scalies and what have you. Not humans. I don't think pregnant humans are all that attractive. Sorry. Yes, I know, I'm a speciesist. lol.
Anyway... Just thought I'd put that out there... Actually, I think it may be time to update my Fetish List and repost it...
Apparently, I Have to go on an Unwatching Spree
Posted 18 years agoI am so fucking tired of hearing the same old, "Cub art is sick," "Pedo's are evil," and the rest of the uneducated, ignorant bullshit. Day after day, I open journal after journal to find the same. Damn. Thing. People who don't know a damn thing, thinking they know anything.
They say they can't support an "evil" act? Yeah, well I can't support blind acceptance of the uninformed sheepishness of you malcontents.
So here's the deal. Everytime I see something like that, someone going on a rant or tangent about something being "evil" or "immoral" without actually knowing anything about it, I'm just going to unwatch you. Simple as that. No communication, no warnings, no goodbyes, no messy drama. Bam, you're off my list.
That's all. Have a nice day in Hell, ladies and gentlemen.
They say they can't support an "evil" act? Yeah, well I can't support blind acceptance of the uninformed sheepishness of you malcontents.
So here's the deal. Everytime I see something like that, someone going on a rant or tangent about something being "evil" or "immoral" without actually knowing anything about it, I'm just going to unwatch you. Simple as that. No communication, no warnings, no goodbyes, no messy drama. Bam, you're off my list.
That's all. Have a nice day in Hell, ladies and gentlemen.
YOU ARE NOT AN ARTIST. D:<
Posted 18 years agoRememer kiddies. Unless you have an art degree, were taught by a real artist, and make money on your art, you are not an artist. You're just a hobbyiest.
Says so, right here in the Artists Handbook.
:p
Says so, right here in the Artists Handbook.
:p
OH MY FUCKING GODS...
Posted 18 years agohttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgjFjCOlv7I
...
...
...
I cannot articulate my feelings. It just won't work.
...
...
...
I cannot articulate my feelings. It just won't work.
Profile Archives, Part II
Posted 18 years agoThat's right ladies and gentlemen, I'm changing my profile again. I figure, this one's a bit long. Maybe that's why people aren't actually reading it? At any rate, I'm still deciding what I want to put into the new one, so my profile is going to be blank until I get that sorted out. Or maybe I'll just put stuff up as I come up with it. Who knows.
Oh well, here's the second archived profile. Come back next year and enjoy a blast from the past.
Alright people; stop thanking me for watches and faves. All I ask is that unless you have something substantial to say, that you do us all a favor and say nothing at all. By the same token, I will not be giving out any more thank you shouts for people who watch or fave me. Now, comments on journals and submissions are another matter; but that's a discussion for a new day.
Hey there! My name's Daniel. There isn't much to say, really (yeah...I'm a fockin' layah, ahn't I...?); I never was any good at these self-introdutions.
Yes, I do Role Play! :D
What do I do?
A lot of things, really. I'm mostly a writer and poet. I also dabble in digital Stick-Figure art, by a mixture of lack of skill and personal choice. Since around 2000, though, I have also dipped my feet into the ocean of Game Design; usually I do table-top RPG's, like User Friendly, but I also have a couple of TCG's in the works, as well as an unrefined idea for a board game. I want to do computer and video games, but I seem to have absolutely NO apptitude for understanding and using programming code of any language.
What am I like?
Well, I'm a mixture of things; a lover, a friend, a nightmare, a hater, a spinner of tales. I am a very oppinionated individual, with a stubborn streak wider than the Earth and a sense of loyalty and dedication that never falters.
What's my background?
I was born in New Brunswick, New Jersey, but lived in Piscatawy for most of my early days. After five or six years, my mother divorced my father and we moved out to Findlay, Ohio; where I preside now. I am biracial, the prodcut of an (obviously) interracial marriage, with a black sire and white mother. But my father, the only man I actually consider to BE my father, is also white. That gets some interesting looks when we go out, as people try to figure out which one of them I belong to, if either.
What are my religious beliefs?
I don't know if there IS an official name for it, but I personally consider myself what I call a Unithiest. In my eyes, every religion has its own validity; to me, every god or goddess that has been dreamt up has existed and was powered by the faith of their followers. For me, it isn't a matter of what god(s) exists and which don't, as much as it is a matter of WHY you chose the god you did. In other words, to a Unithiest there is no one true religion; you choose the path of your faith based on what religion strikes the closest to home for you.
What about my furry status?
Well, I really haven't been a furry for very long. I think maybe a year and a half, as if 06/21/07; when this new profile was written. Honestly, looking back, I've ALWAYS been one, but I never had a name or face to attribute it to. But I think what officially brought me into the fandom was 21st Century Fox, by Scott Kellogg. That was the first furry web-comic that I'd ever seen, and I was automatically intrigued by it. I mean, yeah it's comedy, but it still takes itself more seriously than, say, Loony Tunes.
What are my sexual/romantic quriks?
Well, I'll be the first to admit that I'm a major zoophile. Deal with that as you will. If you're honestly so wrapped up in your own sense of morality that you can't even contemplate the idea that there may be alternative ways of thinking, then please, leave. I have absolutely no time for that kind of foolishness. I'm also polyamorous, though those of you who really know me are already aware of that. It's just, I love who I love. There's no way for me to control that, it's not like I came with some kind of 'On-Off' switch that I can flip whenever I see fit. If I really care about someone, I'll be there with them if they'll allow it. But I don't just sleep with anything that moves. I will only lay with those people who are deeply ensconced into my heart. That includes cyber/yiff. Some members of both teams will also be glad to know that I am a pansexual. When I am attracted to someone, it's rarely only on a physical level. I don't ever give the physical sex of my would-be lovers a thought until the subject comes up between us. I also have a very intense attraction to herms...
Anything else?
Well, nothing I can think of off the top of my head. As always, I leave myself open to any question you may have. I will answer it truthfully and to the best of my ability. So if you want to know anything else about me, my life or where I'm headed, by all means; ask me.
Did you want to contact me?
My IMs are open to everyone, unless you become so frustratingly clingy that I see fit to ignore you. Usually, though, it never goes that far. At any rate, my contacts are listed below. Remember, that you should try to talk to me even if I don't appear to be online or if my status is labeled as BRB; I usually hang out on invisible anyway.
There has been a slight change in protocol. I am no longer displaying my IMs freely to the world, for personal reasons I will not get into here. If you want to know them, NOTE me for them.
Internet Friend/Blogging Sites
Myspace: http://www.myspace.com/diadrin
Livejournal: http://snowy1.livejournal.com/profile
Gaiaonline: Yondara_The ChaosMage (the link for this would be WAAAAAY too long...)
I KNEW I FORGOT SOMETHING! (Things people mentioned I 'forgot' or should add)
Blood Type: You know, I'm not really sure. My mother is...A, I think. Positive. We aren't sure if my sire is A or B, but we know he's positive. So I'm either A positive, or AB positive. I think it's AB, but I could be wrong.
Important Links
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/168456/ (My personal Story Tags)
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/81006/ (My List of Fetishes)
http://wdvsrc.proboards99.com (User Friendly Forums)
Oh well, here's the second archived profile. Come back next year and enjoy a blast from the past.
Alright people; stop thanking me for watches and faves. All I ask is that unless you have something substantial to say, that you do us all a favor and say nothing at all. By the same token, I will not be giving out any more thank you shouts for people who watch or fave me. Now, comments on journals and submissions are another matter; but that's a discussion for a new day.
Hey there! My name's Daniel. There isn't much to say, really (yeah...I'm a fockin' layah, ahn't I...?); I never was any good at these self-introdutions.
Yes, I do Role Play! :D
What do I do?
A lot of things, really. I'm mostly a writer and poet. I also dabble in digital Stick-Figure art, by a mixture of lack of skill and personal choice. Since around 2000, though, I have also dipped my feet into the ocean of Game Design; usually I do table-top RPG's, like User Friendly, but I also have a couple of TCG's in the works, as well as an unrefined idea for a board game. I want to do computer and video games, but I seem to have absolutely NO apptitude for understanding and using programming code of any language.
What am I like?
Well, I'm a mixture of things; a lover, a friend, a nightmare, a hater, a spinner of tales. I am a very oppinionated individual, with a stubborn streak wider than the Earth and a sense of loyalty and dedication that never falters.
What's my background?
I was born in New Brunswick, New Jersey, but lived in Piscatawy for most of my early days. After five or six years, my mother divorced my father and we moved out to Findlay, Ohio; where I preside now. I am biracial, the prodcut of an (obviously) interracial marriage, with a black sire and white mother. But my father, the only man I actually consider to BE my father, is also white. That gets some interesting looks when we go out, as people try to figure out which one of them I belong to, if either.
What are my religious beliefs?
I don't know if there IS an official name for it, but I personally consider myself what I call a Unithiest. In my eyes, every religion has its own validity; to me, every god or goddess that has been dreamt up has existed and was powered by the faith of their followers. For me, it isn't a matter of what god(s) exists and which don't, as much as it is a matter of WHY you chose the god you did. In other words, to a Unithiest there is no one true religion; you choose the path of your faith based on what religion strikes the closest to home for you.
What about my furry status?
Well, I really haven't been a furry for very long. I think maybe a year and a half, as if 06/21/07; when this new profile was written. Honestly, looking back, I've ALWAYS been one, but I never had a name or face to attribute it to. But I think what officially brought me into the fandom was 21st Century Fox, by Scott Kellogg. That was the first furry web-comic that I'd ever seen, and I was automatically intrigued by it. I mean, yeah it's comedy, but it still takes itself more seriously than, say, Loony Tunes.
What are my sexual/romantic quriks?
Well, I'll be the first to admit that I'm a major zoophile. Deal with that as you will. If you're honestly so wrapped up in your own sense of morality that you can't even contemplate the idea that there may be alternative ways of thinking, then please, leave. I have absolutely no time for that kind of foolishness. I'm also polyamorous, though those of you who really know me are already aware of that. It's just, I love who I love. There's no way for me to control that, it's not like I came with some kind of 'On-Off' switch that I can flip whenever I see fit. If I really care about someone, I'll be there with them if they'll allow it. But I don't just sleep with anything that moves. I will only lay with those people who are deeply ensconced into my heart. That includes cyber/yiff. Some members of both teams will also be glad to know that I am a pansexual. When I am attracted to someone, it's rarely only on a physical level. I don't ever give the physical sex of my would-be lovers a thought until the subject comes up between us. I also have a very intense attraction to herms...
Anything else?
Well, nothing I can think of off the top of my head. As always, I leave myself open to any question you may have. I will answer it truthfully and to the best of my ability. So if you want to know anything else about me, my life or where I'm headed, by all means; ask me.
Did you want to contact me?
My IMs are open to everyone, unless you become so frustratingly clingy that I see fit to ignore you. Usually, though, it never goes that far. At any rate, my contacts are listed below. Remember, that you should try to talk to me even if I don't appear to be online or if my status is labeled as BRB; I usually hang out on invisible anyway.
There has been a slight change in protocol. I am no longer displaying my IMs freely to the world, for personal reasons I will not get into here. If you want to know them, NOTE me for them.
Internet Friend/Blogging Sites
Myspace: http://www.myspace.com/diadrin
Livejournal: http://snowy1.livejournal.com/profile
Gaiaonline: Yondara_The ChaosMage (the link for this would be WAAAAAY too long...)
I KNEW I FORGOT SOMETHING! (Things people mentioned I 'forgot' or should add)
Blood Type: You know, I'm not really sure. My mother is...A, I think. Positive. We aren't sure if my sire is A or B, but we know he's positive. So I'm either A positive, or AB positive. I think it's AB, but I could be wrong.
Important Links
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/168456/ (My personal Story Tags)
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/81006/ (My List of Fetishes)
http://wdvsrc.proboards99.com (User Friendly Forums)
