ohhh im also looking for questions for my next youtube video that i will be posting next friday if u like ill pick a question of urs and ill answer it on my channel and put the link up on here for u too see it and if i dont get to any or questions that dont get into that video ill put it in the next video i promise

omg noones even looked at my new drawings !!! how rude of u lol im j/k but anyways im always in and out of here anyways so i guess its all cool im now fully moved in here in dayton and im happy now and i have been makeing videos for my youtube channel. that seems to be where all my engery is oing for my creative type stuff so yeah i havent had much time for any new drawings as of yet heres the link to my youtube channel if u would like to check it out http://www.youtube.com/user/randomr.....f?feature=mhum


that would make me happy if u did check it out and if u have a channel on there cool subbers me and leave me comments and if u dont have an channel thingie on there i like youtube alot if u make anmations u would get alot of views but it has to be non dirty i know sucks right but all the good ones can go on here even if u make music videos for ur own songs and stuff youtube would also be great for that or if u would like to record ur self reading ur poems

and now im sell youtube lolol im such a dork butt ! but hey i would subbers ur channel!

well wellwell i never thought this would happen
ive moved to dayton! omg wtf holy fucking hell ive moved to dayton!!!!!!!!! epic yessnes

im happy yes im a dork so im good now i still miss my baby alot

dearest readers:


sorry its been a while that i have been on here for a little while but its been crazy here state boards life hitting hard at me and my man with himmoveing back too xenia which sucks! and all this crap here at my home. Been so busy i havent had the time to draw really i only got maybe about five or six drawings so far rightg now with some winding down time tomorrow i will have no time to draw for a very good resaon too... Tommorrow is x-fest 15 whoot whoot . Basiclly x-fest is an outdoor connrcet it will be my 3ed time going but my baby's frist time i hope he enjoys it lolol


but thats my update for right now but hopefully within the next few weeks i will have surpises

dearest readers::

Dont ask me why i am doing this or what is going on within my own mind but I feel like I should ask this question and see what pple think about it think me weird or strange or abnormal I really dont care. But who of you believe I mean really believe without adoubt that the spiritual is real?

everyone i am pleased to inform you that I (laura Brock) Go back To grove city,ohio On the july the 27th at 8 am yay I get to get up at the butt crack of dawn on monday and leave little old germantown ohio for the take two at state boards

*sighs* so ok im here hi.... Tuesday of this past week I went for my state boards and failed *growls* i was so upset and so very annoyed!! but anyways i guess I got more studing todo this month cause im retakeing my state boards and b4 u ask its for ohio for cosmetology but i am a grad now of mjcc cause my grad cermanoy was on thursday this past week so yeah its all cool so yeah idk well thought i would update u all and everything so idk what esleto say here besides my b-day is on tuesday

UGH! im sickie ou guys and i have only one drawing done i feel so lazy right now. To much Dramaand fucking stress for one body to take and it FUCKING SUCKS!!!!! and on top if the stress and shit the weather here in ohio IS so FUCKED uo right now right now its 61 outside and its almost 2 am on a friday and it spoused to getup to 82. between that and the weather going from 70/80 to 60 one day and the stress its wham bam thank you ma'am Im sickie.

its just been on of those fucking weeks where it seems like everything just Blows up in your face and nothing goes the way you expect it too at all what so fuckling ever. got to love ohio for all it's shit...... NOT!
im out hopefully ill get SOME sleep tonight wish me luck

well ok i guess noone really like my watchers collction but im still going to post them im still working on one and will have it up within the next few days and illl be starting anoher one soon there after it


well a night or so ago i had the weirdest fucking dream ever. I had a dream about a leperchan selkton male Jacking off anf a female lerpachan selkton waiting to catch the males cum.... Well what can i really say it was the weirdest fucking dream EVER and i really dont know what to make of it or what to even think of it all i can do is laugh at it and just go about my way but i cant stop thinking about it so yeah i guess im a weirdo but whatever

dear fur furs

Im so not do yet im goona make damn sure i go out with a BANG! *pow pow* *BANG BANG* mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! jimmy hit me the the bb gun again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

walks out into the garden and sits down watching the waterfall in my own backyard with papers in my hands and pens, pencils and crayons watching the waterfall being very still as a single tear runs down my cheek.


dearest fur affinity,

the Last pages of my art work will be posted with the next few days/weeks and Ill be more then likely done after that. Im not going to stop doing art or whatever it is that i do. I feel like i don’t belong among you all rocking artists that have superior artwork to mine. Lets Face it i had a good running trying to keep up with everything but where i believe that i belong is the world of rock music and gothic rock. i don’t see this as computation of artwork or superior skills of drawing. My skills are sub par and I don’t have a fursona and nor do i believe myself to be a furry. What I do believe is that i am a witch, that my Spirit side is a wolf and a being that’s a part of myself and a being that is separate from myself and that i very much do believe that one doesn’t need a fursona or a fur suit (which by the way is just marital and thread its all physical and doesn’t amount to much expect if u paid out the ass for it )But me in my opinion mind that this is only what i think and what i feel within myself is that I-myself- don’t need a fur suit or a fursona i think because i am spiritually linked through mind body and soul to the wolf essence within me that I can physical feel wolf fur, ears and tail as much as i can feel the three sets of wings i do have within me spiritually. As I come to realize not everyone is a witch and like myself or even believe like I do. let alone feel what’s all ready inside of them and what is already there.

Im a wolf Im not going to try to be anything im not. Im not reptilian or fox, dragon, bear, cat or anything other then what I am and that’s a wolf that has crow, gargoyle and vampire bat in me and I can feel it all since I am connected and it was until recently I got that back of what I lost and that was myself cause no thanks to one asshole saying I need a better boyfriend and better friends cause I’ve seen one movie and that was three months ago in November on the 20th. New moon yes. And my best friend lives in Springfield, Ohio or in Englewood. So im happy with what I have and if im happy with what I have then why should someone else say I need better when they don’t know what its like living 45 mins from the one you love and another hour from your best friend that you love just as much and would do anything to protect them from harm and that goes for the one you love the one you’ve given your heart too if that’s not better then I don’t know what is.

Within the coming days and/or weeks Ill be posting the last of my art work up on here and more then likely be another two or more months away. Its tough out there in the really real world but I’ve been surviving it for so long that I don’t know no other world/s. Music and books have helped me survive and now I got my boyfriend and mate and my real best friend/s and I don’t need much else besides food water and the net other then that I have what I need to keep on going battling what I need to battle and growing where I need to grow and learning where I need to learn. I’ve had a good run fur affinity and those who watch me you’ve been real kind to me and I thank you for it. Best of wishes and luck to those on my watch list and to those who are watching me. May the lord and lady or whatever god/s you follow bless you each and every single day of your life/s and may it be a peaceful life you live lord and lady bless and blessed be

La Luna Loba

I CANT DRAW WORTH A SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dearest readers:


fuck yeah ive been away for two months but who really cares if im gone? and who would really would wnt to mate me ? i guess noone.... but anyways 2 months... feels more like three months then anything or more and my artwork is rather shotie i cant draw to save my life and stuff like that

ive been busy so busy in fact that it took me this long to get back or even at least to even try to draw again I finished up my last class meaning MY VERY last class for school on decmber 23ed of last year Oh fucking thank the gods i was getting so sick of mjcc and what the hell was i thinking about going back for esthics (skin care) for another fliping year !!!!

but whatever like it matters now all im doing now is waitting on cosmotolgy state boards for ohio(yes I live in ohio germantown to be excate for ya lol) to hurry their slow asses up for a student id for me so i can take my mangers test and then take the cosmotogly part of it soon there after real life is so fucking boring! i now can understand why mos of you on here would rather be your fursonas (i hoped i spelled that right) a good part of the time. But what i dont get is why the fur suit for Im still trying to warp my mind around it. yeah im a wiccan and i dont fully have a fursona for the mere fact that a side of myself spiritural is a werewolf and i mean full feldge real werewolf/wolf and i can feel the fur and tail along with the wings i have (yes i have wings thats just cause i am like only slightly part garygole, crow and now part vampire bat and i ave wings for all 3 tho my bat wings are even so slightly replaceing my crow wings which aint happening I love my crow wings and want to keep them!). Yeah well some miht beleive tht fully that someone can have 3 sets of wings and be a werewolf for real in this realm but its all spiritual and i have always loved wolves,crows, garygoyles,crows and bats. But the wolf is my main spirit guide and anmail so it makes sense to me

if u r reading this dont stop or something bad will happen! my name is summer i am 15 years old i have blonde hair ,many scars no nose or ears.. i am dead. if u dont copy this just like from the ring, copy n post this on 5 more sites.. or.. i will appear one dark quiet night when ur not expecting it by your bed with a knife and kill u. this is no joke something good will happen to u if you post this on 5 more pages comment

Dearest readers:: (mind you this is my opioin you are welcome to agree or to disargee or ust to agree to disagree but however you look at it hopefully you may have some wisdom to share with me or others who are in a simaller bind such as myself)


Im not willing to risk adding another person into my realionship with my boyfriend right now since he and i havent had the chance to even live together yet and knowing how unstable we are and me with my issuses. all i know is that my opioin is that with one friend that likes me and my boyfriend both it dont feel it is the right time to even be thinking about adding them into the realtionship so soon

And my opioin is that the person was putting far to much hope into the realtionship part of it when the three of us dont even know where our feelings stand or even what levels they are at .I know im not ready for it and it may oe may not happen either it could go either way but im not putting any hope into something that may or may not even pan out into the furture and in the two veisons i have had there wasnt even a third person in the realtionship. Why david ever thought that getting the lovers card when he did a taort reading was meant that the person who is slightly low level on the friendship key could ever enter into our realtionship is beyond me.

All i know is that i got the lovers card in a reading i did on myself can or could mean many things but not adding another to the realtionship with tarot cards there are always hidden meanings in them meassges that we dont see just then when we do the reading but you always have keep that in the back of your mind thaat it could mean many things it could mean something going on now currentlyor something that might have happened in your past or in your futrue but it usselly doesnt mean or point ot a speice place or person the intuper of the meassge thats being givne must draw on his or hers own coulsions on what it might mean or what it could mean wheither its a day, week two weeks, a month ot three to five years down the road.

the tarot deck is smiplely a divation tool and as it being a tool for a witch to use it has different meanings for different pple who use it weatherit be the three decks i use Fariy orcale (yes it is a taort deck not and orcale deck my boyfriend is cracked in the head for thinking its an orcale deck. But im cracked in the head too), My arturian deck which means som much to me since i have such a fancitsion with the arthurian myths and leageds, and last but not least my welsh deck which i also hold near and dear to my heart. I hold all three tarot decks close to my heart. The fariy orcale deck was the second deck i got the frist was the rider whaite deck oh lord how did i disliked that deck and then i fot the fariy deck and that one became the one i used the most and now the three decks i have i use all three equally tho i pefer my arthurain deck a bit more then i do the other too but i stil love all three decks all of them have a speaicl meaning to me not only as a witch but as a person a well.

if this make me sound slefish or paranoid or even jealous then i dont know what to tell ya. And of cousre it is my life and i will do as i please or how i see fit as long as i am true to myself as a person my beliefs are mine and mine alone and im not here to force anyone not even those who do take the time to read my blogs my ideas and morals and belifs onto them. I am smiplely a woman who is a witch, has an affinty to wolves,believes in ghosts and spirits,wants to be a paranormal investgateor and a cosmotogest at the same time and even mayb an actoress some day one day,Music whore,book junkie , a junkie for the written words of my faith and imagainey that guides me thourgh out my life along the side of my boyfriend because i have eyes like no other and i coud get lost in his forever and i ust hope he feels the same about me.

Dearest readers:::
(HOW I AM FEELING AT THIS POINT)




I am loved yet while I am at home here in Germantown I’m emotionally abused by my Grandmother who supposedly loves me for who I am. When in the reality of it she doesn’t love me for the fact that I myself am a black sheep a title I gladly have taken though out my life and I have always gone my own way but yet I still let people walk all over me outside of this house but when I’m here I wont put up with the bullhead the threats and the name calling the my grandmother puts out. I recall that one day my grandmother asked me if I was a slut.

It hurt to have a grandmother think that of me. If my grandma Sherlly and Claire where still alive and were here when she asked that they would have bitched slapped her tho my mamaw claira died when I was a year old I knew she loved me regardless of what I was going to become from the time i was born to now. I know my mamaw sherry does she always loved me for I am and after her death in September of 2001 I knew she still loved me more then the one im currently residing with now




It seems like the only people I have left now are the friends I do have and my boyfriend who accept me foe who I really am and not for what I am not. While living here I feel like I lose a little bit of who I am and what I have worked so hard over the years and this past year each day to become the granddaughter that the grandmother that I live with wants, before I started going to school for hair she wanted me to become a nurse but I had no heart for it. I hate hospitals greatly cant stand being in one let alone working in one. To me working in a hospital has no room for creative and I am a creative person. I Don’t know it feels like to me that the woman I call granndma wants to be part of the norm to fit into some model that isn’t uniquely me, uniquely who I am, or even lets me be unique or lets me be as I am on the inside as well as the outside.

Because of her I don’t feel like I have any talents or that I’m talented or that im special or even unique or that I have nothing to give the world beside another Fat person trying to make it out there in the world that’s filled with people that fit into the perfect mold of normal. To her all I will ever be is a fat woman that is stupid and boring and that cant do anything right. To her all I am is nothing. Not to be seen and not to be heard and it hurts

As the samhain flame flickers and glows all souls roam to see and gather around the single flame of the craved pumnkin lamp. The lost souls wander freely paying no mind thethe ember flame of samhain. We untie to guide those who are lost to the fray maythose souls and our souls rest easy tonight for all souls find their way back to the samhain flame

I will be doing somethingto honner my dearly dead and departed anctoers for all hallows eve and dia de la murte (day of the dead(mexico)..) for it is what i am who i am and where my bloodcomes from



(Side note the Belgian flag isnt going to be a part of it well because that isnt a part of me but it is still a very pretty flag and place(:)

*sits down indain style and exhales deeply*

well well well looks like im back. i dont even remebr how long i have been gone i havent been keeping tabs on here for a long while. my brief Breather turned out to be umm what is the word for it a mini vaction if you can call being away for three or so a mini vaction this wolfie has being going thourgh a whole hell of alot but thur it all im happy im still with my main sqeuzze my mondragon or as i call him dragon *smiles* spent a week with him starting last sunday going to this sunday and im home now ready for a new day i needed the week away from g-town to much here at the house that im living at drama stupied crap i was ready to beat someone into a plup. Im glad i got to spend time with my hunny i had alot of fun being a very cute wolfie with and for my dragonheart

To All on my friends list living in ,around Dayton, Beavercreek , Kettering, Trotwood, Englewood, Miamisburg, Xenia and Huber Heights::::



I have come to the thought through hard thinking and a very hard choice of a certain situation that I am under going at my place of residence in Germantown on the border of Farmersville. I live in Germantown but have a Farmersville phone number, Its not my house I live with my grandparents. My mother and I do. And now as of today I have come to the decision after the threat my not so nice grandmother gave of throwing me out that I’ll leave willing and almost by that choice of leaving giving up on my dream of being a cosmologist which I have been going to school for two years and spouse to gradate July 1est which is less then 72 hours away after fully failing my last class after taking it twice before hand.

I have chosen to leave Miami Jacobs and Germantown to live in Dayton and find work as anything that is legal in the Dayton region. This sounds very much like I’m giving up on my cosmologist Dream which has been my passion since I was four one of the many things I wanted and had planed on doing with my self to make myself better then what my mother has; a part-time job at the Dayton Daily news PTC in Franklin close to my school Miami Jacobs in Springboro. As to my mothers part-time job she hardly gets any hours only working two to four days out of the week if she is lucky to get four days for only getting only 200 dollars or less I think every two weeks for two to three days of work . I don’t have a job but lord and lady willing once I have fully come to the thought of really leaving I will need a job as soon as possible.


So therefore the reason of this bulletin I’m asking for help, I need a job

im sorry for everything

yep thats right today was the day our 7 month mark of being in a realtionship mine and mondragons(aka david simmons) yeah well today was the day till midnight love him a whole hell of alot now i feel drained and very terid with a headache and feeling like i could blow chunks at any random time.

i dont know wy he fell asleep on me so aburtly idk he did have to work today too and he has to work tomorrow idk if we will be going to the funny bone tommorrow at 9:30 pm since he has to work tomorrow 4 to 8 and the way he has been feeling today after her got home we had a long talk im not givingthe details here the ones whotalk to my dragon on the daily bais you guys can ask him but i wont give them out on here its just all random really if it is random ignoring things ignoreing things within myself or just not looking at them is what it feels like to me

my heart hurts right now as i type this a soild love i have found im confused i have probelms that i have to work on so does he this realtionship has lasted this long 7 months worth of love i just hope it will be a year worth of love pure love deep love

real love so deep it hurts to eventhink we could lose each other right nowmy thoughts are not even syncing with my heart damn head damn thoughts damn fucking issues that are hindering me. im growing as fastas i can at this pointin time. Damn fucking issues of mine

god just i need help i need the opioins of those who have been in my place frist love frist realtionship ineed outside eyes to look in and point out to me what i maybe doing wrong and wht i think might be right or wrong

its tough it is im rambling right now but still i need help please help me help myself

i feel like such a bad girlfriend i want it to be about me me me when in realtiy thats not how it works it needs to be eqaul thats how life its give and take not all take take take take so ill be.........yeah you know noone is perfect ........im not

only way To TRUELY show off my LOVE METAL is to take a bit of a brief breather and gather all my matriels that i may need for SHOW YOUR LOVE METAL gala and yes i called it a gala let us him fans come together and show off what we do when it comes to our fave band H.I.M and of cousre the front man WHO started it all MR. Ville Valo! Got to love a man in black eyeliner hehe