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It has been while
Posted 4 months agoHello
I want something out of my chest. I have been distant to few people including my friends expect a few.
I have been stressed, scared to speak out, anxiety and my self esteem.
I been in somewhat in rough place been stressed for working too much or too less. Can't go cons expect CFZ or furc/other UK cons due of money even i really want to try NFC next year but it is unlikely to happen even if i have funds just whole thing is a mess in my end. Yes I have FOMO but part of me don't enjoy or expressed feelings. I do love fursuiting but idk just social life for me is hard as I have social anxiety and my speech is somewhat good but i just get overwhelmed with tiredness even in VRCHAT on group meets I'm just get overwhelmed.
it doesn't feels like me past 5 years. What happen past 5 years is changed me which I can't let go and it hurts me. But most of time I just don't think about it much just dreams/thoughts just brings it back.
My self esteem to some of my friends I have been afraid to speak/type about it even to one of my close friend and my ex boyfriend. I just don't know how to expressed my feelings to them. It has been rough rollercoaster to me.
Not many people come to see me: expect to one of my bird friends who comes see me and I see him every two/three months but other UK friends I know off is busy or me having lack of time due with work and not having weekends off but it is life.
other news that i'm going see my stepdad in the USA(seattle) and few of birdfriends in august which i am excited and nervous.
I want something out of my chest. I have been distant to few people including my friends expect a few.
I have been stressed, scared to speak out, anxiety and my self esteem.
I been in somewhat in rough place been stressed for working too much or too less. Can't go cons expect CFZ or furc/other UK cons due of money even i really want to try NFC next year but it is unlikely to happen even if i have funds just whole thing is a mess in my end. Yes I have FOMO but part of me don't enjoy or expressed feelings. I do love fursuiting but idk just social life for me is hard as I have social anxiety and my speech is somewhat good but i just get overwhelmed with tiredness even in VRCHAT on group meets I'm just get overwhelmed.
it doesn't feels like me past 5 years. What happen past 5 years is changed me which I can't let go and it hurts me. But most of time I just don't think about it much just dreams/thoughts just brings it back.
My self esteem to some of my friends I have been afraid to speak/type about it even to one of my close friend and my ex boyfriend. I just don't know how to expressed my feelings to them. It has been rough rollercoaster to me.
Not many people come to see me: expect to one of my bird friends who comes see me and I see him every two/three months but other UK friends I know off is busy or me having lack of time due with work and not having weekends off but it is life.
other news that i'm going see my stepdad in the USA(seattle) and few of birdfriends in august which i am excited and nervous.
2023 vent time.
Posted 3 years agoHello everyone. so I want get some stuff out my chest. 2020-2022 been rough for me. I made so many mistakes even lost friendships. I wish I could explain but it kind of hurts me and some people that I do care. I understand about myself why I did it maybe I was scared or just stupid and make bad choices for myself and i never want do them again. I decided to take break from my friends servers (Dec to March) and if CFZ 2023 goes well or not. I probably decide fate on myself and fandom that I'm in. hopefully I can change and learn my mistake trying be more respectful, honest, mature and responsible.
Commission and stuff: I will be stopping commissioning people like 24/7 trying not get addicted instead of thinking about raining days. I will be posting some old arts and few 2022 art with new friends.
Friendship: what I have learn for my self destructive behaviour two of my close friends. I Need to stop rushing myself to make things worse. I'm going take things slow as possible. I hope I can be invited back to servers. I hope in the future I can have my close friend back if i don't rush myself and just take things slow. Trust and honestly for now I'm just going wait till whenever in the future they can message me and try get friendship back I just don't know how or where to start.
The future: For the future I going save up for going to EF or USA con in 2025 time. Oh course wanted send my lovely boyfriend to see me in august or next year. Maybe If I hit my goal of getting £10K instead mistake wasting my money on my Macaw Joel >v< and not having much money for fees and such. I wanted get another fursuit in the future.
Self refection: I have agree with my friends that they are worried about me. I understand that. I wish I could do better and avoid myself to make same mistakes. I don't want to self destructive behaviour and end up losing more friends that I hurt. I will try my hardest to be better person than last few years which I dug myself hole deeper.
Positive updates:
Project X/story: This info is top secret but in short. I have plan 10 to 12 part mini series into one big sci-fi story which could be done at end of year but part one and two will be done hopefully in end of May.
New Joel? well I am planning change my Sona with few updates not such on what but I do have ideas maybe Tiger Joel might appear soon who knows. stay toon for that in the future.
The end: I hope you understand. We all need to learn our mistakes and hope we can rebuild them and avoid it forever. always try try your best no matter what I love you and I hope I can improve myself to be better macaw.
Commission and stuff: I will be stopping commissioning people like 24/7 trying not get addicted instead of thinking about raining days. I will be posting some old arts and few 2022 art with new friends.
Friendship: what I have learn for my self destructive behaviour two of my close friends. I Need to stop rushing myself to make things worse. I'm going take things slow as possible. I hope I can be invited back to servers. I hope in the future I can have my close friend back if i don't rush myself and just take things slow. Trust and honestly for now I'm just going wait till whenever in the future they can message me and try get friendship back I just don't know how or where to start.
The future: For the future I going save up for going to EF or USA con in 2025 time. Oh course wanted send my lovely boyfriend to see me in august or next year. Maybe If I hit my goal of getting £10K instead mistake wasting my money on my Macaw Joel >v< and not having much money for fees and such. I wanted get another fursuit in the future.
Self refection: I have agree with my friends that they are worried about me. I understand that. I wish I could do better and avoid myself to make same mistakes. I don't want to self destructive behaviour and end up losing more friends that I hurt. I will try my hardest to be better person than last few years which I dug myself hole deeper.
Positive updates:
Project X/story: This info is top secret but in short. I have plan 10 to 12 part mini series into one big sci-fi story which could be done at end of year but part one and two will be done hopefully in end of May.
New Joel? well I am planning change my Sona with few updates not such on what but I do have ideas maybe Tiger Joel might appear soon who knows. stay toon for that in the future.
The end: I hope you understand. We all need to learn our mistakes and hope we can rebuild them and avoid it forever. always try try your best no matter what I love you and I hope I can improve myself to be better macaw.
I'm back
Posted 4 years agoWell i have my own flat and full time job. I need post fuck ton of art soon
i'm getting better with my mental health. snice May (it long story i don't want to get into it) but i have sort of recover within my mental health hopefully i can be a normal macaw
to do list:
(possible female) Zoroark ref sheet
Lugia Joel ref sheet
human Joel ref (may be sci-fi)
Vrchat Joel
more Joel art with friends
i'm getting better with my mental health. snice May (it long story i don't want to get into it) but i have sort of recover within my mental health hopefully i can be a normal macaw
to do list:
(possible female) Zoroark ref sheet
Lugia Joel ref sheet
human Joel ref (may be sci-fi)
Vrchat Joel
more Joel art with friends
Buzy 4 months
Posted 5 years agoI will be busy in 4 months time.. i need post some art... but i just don't have time. so in new year there will be under 20 arts or more. stressful day. i move into my aunts and uncles till i get house save. i hope things goes well for me.
i'm going to confuzzled
Posted 6 years agoHey, everyone, I'm going to confuzzled only for couple days because money issues but me and my friend will come and hug you all. I will be around from Friday to Sunday. I will post some photos soon whenever I can!
one month to hatchday
Posted 6 years agoJoel hatchday is coming up in 6/7/2019 he will be 22 year old green winged macaw ovo
I like have little gifts arts http://www.furaffinity.net/view/29040432/ and http://www.furaffinity.net/view/30808738/
I like have little gifts arts http://www.furaffinity.net/view/29040432/ and http://www.furaffinity.net/view/30808738/
Joel the Green Winged Macaw: About me (Q/A)
Posted 6 years agoso my name is Joel Forrest i do not have furry name.. if so it be so dumb and silly.. so JoelTHEGWM as my main furry name and I suffer with depression and grief. I have two oldest brother and one young sister (who i don't see much often) I lost two person due of cancer (my mother and my close friend) I been almost year of being furry. I am getting GWM(green winged macaw) partial suit (talons, arm wings, tail and mask) I will be i hope 3rd bird suiter in Yorkshire not sure in England/UK but i love go to Leeds fur meets and meet lovely people..even when i get my own suit i love to wing HUG them to death.
What you will be in future: I want to be writer i am still working on my novel called "mutare" then i got more plans of some novel like: "Griffin choice" and "The last Griffin" (base on roleplay into novel) and maybe "JoeltheGWM macaw life" I am still learning to improve myself.
what makes you furry: since November.. i have meet two lovely person "avon" and "Pirate eagle" they cool friends to me even i gift plush pirate eagle to pirate eagle which he enjoys ^V^ (I wonder how that plush is doing?)
who are you main friends are: my close friend is my peregrine falcon griffin he inspire me to do more work without him i won't be furry and i won't be macaw, I am very grateful to my good amazing friend "Falkie" who stood by me and I stood with him making him happy and well. Thank you found me my inner bird!
are you going to fur-con: "maybe.. i love go to USA,Sweden,UK i love to see OMUmacaw and have both Green winged Macaws hug but money and travel is pain for me.. even i really want to meet OMUmacaw but i don't know if i have money for it
why you pick green winged macaw: well i was thinking red bird and closest is scarlet (there quite some of them) but Green winged Macaw even I did not know there was another green winged macaw on this website that makes me happy even i love to make friends with fellow macaws friends
you got any question i will try to answer them <3 comment below
What you will be in future: I want to be writer i am still working on my novel called "mutare" then i got more plans of some novel like: "Griffin choice" and "The last Griffin" (base on roleplay into novel) and maybe "JoeltheGWM macaw life" I am still learning to improve myself.
what makes you furry: since November.. i have meet two lovely person "avon" and "Pirate eagle" they cool friends to me even i gift plush pirate eagle to pirate eagle which he enjoys ^V^ (I wonder how that plush is doing?)
who are you main friends are: my close friend is my peregrine falcon griffin he inspire me to do more work without him i won't be furry and i won't be macaw, I am very grateful to my good amazing friend "Falkie" who stood by me and I stood with him making him happy and well. Thank you found me my inner bird!
are you going to fur-con: "maybe.. i love go to USA,Sweden,UK i love to see OMUmacaw and have both Green winged Macaws hug but money and travel is pain for me.. even i really want to meet OMUmacaw but i don't know if i have money for it
why you pick green winged macaw: well i was thinking red bird and closest is scarlet (there quite some of them) but Green winged Macaw even I did not know there was another green winged macaw on this website that makes me happy even i love to make friends with fellow macaws friends
you got any question i will try to answer them <3 comment below
Project: mutare Transfromation Novel
Posted 6 years agoI been think with my brain.. to work on new novel with transformation, love, friendship, trust, history, characters that you to know of..
Story: Boy with powers to Transformation to any animal but his mother keep secret but gain trust and learn more about his power..and explore new world with his hidden power..
coming soon (support link.. coming soon)
it will be free..but i like get support my new project.. so ko-fi or pateron maybe..
Story: Boy with powers to Transformation to any animal but his mother keep secret but gain trust and learn more about his power..and explore new world with his hidden power..
coming soon (support link.. coming soon)
it will be free..but i like get support my new project.. so ko-fi or pateron maybe..
Want to talk? Discord or Telegram (Closed free commission)
Posted 7 years agoI going say this I going closed and stop my TF stories forever because I not really creative minded even I did pheagle TF one that just rubbish and always same thing. But however more art on it way for end of year <3
If you want I invite you into my server ,meme,birds,and my stories
I love to make new friends that I don't know off.. even I ask some question to know you more ^V^
I am very talkative person but I do have speaking difficulty's and I love to hear your voices!
JoelTheGWM#1337(discord) or @JoelTheGWM(telegram) https://t.me/JoelTheGWM (stickers coming soon in 2019)
my discord server: https://discord.gg/DUaFn9g it free to join!!
Thank you so I will accept any friend request to have nice chat!
JoelTheGWM^V^
Free Commission are Open
Posted 7 years agoRequest is Free, send me Note or discord JoelTheGWM#1337 or comment below follow http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8854162/
It will take 1 to 2 weeks with improvements by falkie
without improvements will take me 1 to 3 days
Queue:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Working on:
1.
Philippine eagle transformation (GIFT) (80% Improving by )
2.
and 
(Collab) (80%)
3.
Snowly owl transformation (GIFT) (DONE)
might be Planning:
1. Green winged Macaw transformation (SFW and NSFW)
2.
deer/swan transformation (GIFT)
It will take 1 to 2 weeks with improvements by falkie
without improvements will take me 1 to 3 daysQueue:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Working on:
1.
Philippine eagle transformation (GIFT) (80% Improving by )2.
and 
(Collab) (80%) 3.
Snowly owl transformation (GIFT) (DONE)might be Planning:
1.
Green winged Macaw transformation (SFW and NSFW)2.
deer/swan transformation (GIFT)Re-posting file into TXT only
Posted 7 years agoJust re-posting Openoffice file into TXT instead of downloading them also if you want support me via paypal JoelForrest1997(@)gmail.com or add me master59JAF#7196 on discord i like to talk <3 I don't have patreon or whatever but might be thinking to setup one.
Soon: NSFW art and Reference art SFW, NSFW Collab (kind of) art
Thank you all for support and i had new friend to talk to! for cheer me up with my depression even I might plan to go to Leeds next weekend to spend around on with my oldest brother to do some bowling and stuff
Soon: NSFW art and Reference art SFW, NSFW Collab (kind of) art
Thank you all for support and i had new friend to talk to! for cheer me up with my depression even I might plan to go to Leeds next weekend to spend around on with my oldest brother to do some bowling and stuff
Want to talk? Discord or Steam and Q/A
Posted 7 years agoAdd me on Steam: Master59JAF or Discord master59JAF#7196
If you want I invite you into my server for role-playing,meme,birds,and my stories
I love to make new friends that I don't know off.. even I ask some question to know you more ^V^
I am very talkative person but I do have speaking difficulty's and I love to hear your voices!
I do work full time but I will to talk!
Thank you so I will accept any friend request.
Joel Forrest ^V^
Q/A
Q:where do you live?
A:I live in East Yorkshire near Hull (about hour drive form there)
Q:what your age and gender?
A:I am male 21 years old
Q:do want meet others people on FA in IRL?
A: I wish i could but can't find anyone who live near me
Q: Do you Like Roleplaying
A: oh yes even I go crazy on something but sometimes i like NSFW roleplaying just for fun
Q:what you do for work?
A: I work Full time at Kingspan near Scarborough it was fun Taking break
Posted 7 years agoFree Request is closed
well going be closed forever since nobody did request but oh well
Taking week or two Break off doing stories next week going work on Red kite griffin transformation, Thank you all for support!!
Please leave note for request and follow request guideline here http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8854162/
I put you all next week to do list!! whenever I am Free!! thank you for reading!!
well going be closed forever since nobody did request but oh well
Taking week or two Break off doing stories next week going work on Red kite griffin transformation, Thank you all for support!!
Please leave note for request and follow request guideline here http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8854162/
I put you all next week to do list!! whenever I am Free!! thank you for reading!!
MY TIME ZONE FOR FREE REQUEST
Posted 7 years agoMON-TUES-THURS: OPEN: 5:10PM-11:00PM WEDNESDAY: 7:15PM-11:00PM FRI: 4:30pm - 12:30pm
SAT: 10:00AM-12:30PM SUN: 10:00AM - 11:00PM (UK TIME)
MULTI TF: YES I WILL TRY MY HARDEST OF IT
ONLY ONE TF: yes any animal/other but not too hard for me
NSFW: No but i will do in the future it just not my kind
Request:
Title name: your stories title
Character name: your character name
Character TF: Your main character transformed into?
Multi Character: you can have other character
Other Character can TF: you have other character transformed into animal/other if you want
Gender/Age: your character age and what gender is he/her
Place/area: you can added other place/area for your story
transformation cause by:
Do you want your name in your story?: Y/N (if you want i can put nickname instead of your real name) (for example: Falcon TF by Joel Forrest and requested by Tiggers97JAF/Joel Forrest)
for example:
“hello I like to have Falcon TF my main character called Jacklyn and she is female character and she is 25 years old. I have two other characters and they name is Finley who is male about 27 years old and Charlotte who is female about 20 years old both of my other characters I do not want them to transform and my choice of place/area is small forest, Cafe and his cottage house and final place is airfield with forest nearby it thanks, my title of story is Peregrine dive and yes I want my nickname only. Thank you I can't wait for it”
How long it will take: It take me mostly day or two each night if its weekend it will take me under 5 hours but sometimes I take break to think about story
Just send me note i will respond soon as can!
Thanks let me know on discord at #stories or here!!
SAT: 10:00AM-12:30PM SUN: 10:00AM - 11:00PM (UK TIME)
MULTI TF: YES I WILL TRY MY HARDEST OF IT
ONLY ONE TF: yes any animal/other but not too hard for me
NSFW: No but i will do in the future it just not my kind
Request:
Title name: your stories title
Character name: your character name
Character TF: Your main character transformed into?
Multi Character: you can have other character
Other Character can TF: you have other character transformed into animal/other if you want
Gender/Age: your character age and what gender is he/her
Place/area: you can added other place/area for your story
transformation cause by:
Do you want your name in your story?: Y/N (if you want i can put nickname instead of your real name) (for example: Falcon TF by Joel Forrest and requested by Tiggers97JAF/Joel Forrest)
for example:
“hello I like to have Falcon TF my main character called Jacklyn and she is female character and she is 25 years old. I have two other characters and they name is Finley who is male about 27 years old and Charlotte who is female about 20 years old both of my other characters I do not want them to transform and my choice of place/area is small forest, Cafe and his cottage house and final place is airfield with forest nearby it thanks, my title of story is Peregrine dive and yes I want my nickname only. Thank you I can't wait for it”
How long it will take: It take me mostly day or two each night if its weekend it will take me under 5 hours but sometimes I take break to think about story
Just send me note i will respond soon as can!
Thanks let me know on discord at #stories or here!!
