okay since I'm probably going to pass out real soon I just wanted to let you guys know a couple of things

art related

- I am back to working on commissions ( I had taken a couple days to myself bc I needed to rest)
- I'll be posting more soon (probably tomorrow or tonight if I wake up again)
- I won't be taking any commissions again until the 20th// only 4 slots then
- I now have a new style that I really like (the painted headshots)

characters

- I'm moving all characters to toyhouse, very slowly tho// a lot safer and won't crash or lock me out like sta.sh could
- I'm still open for selling some >> -- Characters for Sale -- //main sale journal

IRL

- allergies suck ugh
- I'll be taking papers to my doctor so that we can talk about my surgery I'll be having
- safeway pharmacy is a bitch
- no meds for a little while so I'll be in horrid pain for a little bit
- Boo (myleo) is doing okay!

everything else

- I am so tired right now and might pass out within the hour...

LOOKIE
http://sta.sh/0p4c702c7pr
http://sta.sh/0bmpihum9jg
http://sta.sh/01ie3sjf05dz
http://sta.sh/02r0g6rtwlm << 10 gallon tank btw


I am so glad I did, they're so small

She (I'm gonna go with she for now ok) is so skinny and her tail is like a freaking toothpick and she's still got stuck shed on her toes

She looks a little emaciated too, which worries me a lot because all of the other around her didn't look like that so
She's got good energy tho, which is great so she's not TOO bad...

I got her some waxworms to fatten her up a little and some Repashy superfood (meant for keopard geckos) for both her and Ghost

so hopefully everything will go fine but... yeah

so all the oc's featured here are the ones I want to get rid of.

Just comment if you want them // paypal only

http://sta.sh/026xy688qbc4 - $1
http://sta.sh/0itxorrv5uz - $5
http://sta.sh/0dykclea7eh - $5
http://sta.sh/01vee9kot8ir - $3
http://sta.sh/0ylkeftlio1 - $3
http://sta.sh/01rgxbbsxhuz - $4
http://sta.sh/01jhfs5u5i2m - $4
http://sta.sh/0rfcv7gru56 - $2 each #1 sold
http://sta.sh/07zkh6obl7k - $4 each
http://sta.sh/2ohp2p19f7c?edit=1 - $6 (comes with icon)

http://sta.sh/27yambu80gf?edit=1 - $15 (comes with shaded drawing & speedpaint)

http://sta.sh/01pgvqof2cot - $3 each // shows which ones are closed and open



I kind of need some money for some medical things // medicine/ loose clothing// stuff like that//

I can't fucking draw right now and its fucking making me tired and pissed off and I just want to fucking cry

Like I just want to get all this shit over and done with so that it doesn't stare me in the face everyday and I just cant fucking do it for some stupid fucking reason, and I'm tired of people asking how their stuff is because I'm trying, I'm trying so hard to finish it all but then I get these sprouts of not being able to even draw a fucking head or SOMETHING

Im trying my hardest to get all of my commissions done because I don't want them staring at me anymore, I have promising to do work and then when I try nothing comes out because I'm either to stressed out, I'm feeling sick, or I just can't fucking draw for NOT APPARENT REASON
even tho I just fucking finished some designs, Like all of my energy was taken doing those fucking designs and I just want to throw them away now

my 3+ hours of working on them will only amount to fucking under $10 because oh sure people like my stuff but they don't want to pay for whats its worth because its not worth it

which I understand, I don't have much money either, but I hate making designs like this because this always happens. One person bids and then they get something I worked on for more than a couple hours on for only a couple bucks..
No one else bids, ever. Just always 1 person.


I don't know anymore, I just... I hate drawing and doing things anymore.... I really hate it,, it stresses me out so much anymore...
and I don't have the money to refund anyone so that I have less of a pile to work on because the money I get I feed myself with, or get things I really need at that time. Or with doctor bills, I can barely pay those anymore plus my phone bill and meds, and then try living off a certain amount of money for the month because it never fucking lasts. ever

I just... I'm sorry for ranting but I'm so tired of feeling like crap for promising things and then I either can't seem to do them or I break them off or forget them completely...

I can barely keep y thoughts together so I'm sorry if you're actually reading that and it makes no sense.. I'm sorry

Got some new rules on my babies now, which is posted everywhere on there pretty much

Rules:
- Note me or comment on this journal if interested in any characters.
- If taken, I will put "SOLD" so people know its taken
- SOLD oc's stay up for 24 hrs so the buyer can get the file(s) for their new oc unless they say I can remove it early
- In For Sale/Trade folder, there are prices if you click on the character. If too high, we can negotiate//unless trading
- I use a key to keep my characters organised on how much I like them, like the folder situation too

--Keys--
NFS -- Not for Sale
TS -- Tentative about Selling
TO -- Trade Only

NFS -- not getting rid of unless you offer a ton//these guys mean too much to me for a couple bucks
TS -- I'll sell/trade but its gotta be a good offer
TO -- Trading only because... no reason really



Sta.sh link
http://sta.sh/21x2nhey0zs4?edit=1

So in the coming weeks I feel like a lot will be brought to light and I'll finally know some things. I won't tell much on here about what it is yet, because my doctor isn't 100% sure, but I will later.

I'm doing okay, though I could be better, but I'm doing as best I can.


(It has to do with my pelvic pain, which has been going on for a really long time// for those who are curious)

---

also do you guys have any tips or management ideas and such that would help with constant pain?

It's around the pelvic area, lower, and rarely goes away. Sometimes back pain or tailbone pain. Hips too

It feels like its a throbbing, aching pain, but sometimes it gets sharp and overwhelming. Can come out of no where or having been building up all day. Sometimes it feels like I'm being stabbed by a dull knife over and over


What I do to help it usually:
advil
midol
heating pad
pillow under my butt (for when its affecting my tailbone or hips)


sleeping helps some, but I don't like sleeping my days away too much, unless it gets to be too bad


so.. any tips or ideas..?

so I'm only open for today. Not taking anymore commissions for a while after today.

3 slots only. No exceptions.

Prices//TOS are here: http://palesmokecommissions.weebly.com/


So to get a slot, comment below to claim & tell me what you want

Form:

Username:
Commission Type:
Transparent background? Yes/No
Additional characters: Yes/No (if yes, fill out the last part for however many characters you want)
Rest of Info: (ref//poses(or freestyle for any pose)// additional stuff)

Ex Form:

Username: pasteldork
Commission Type: sketch
Transparent background? Yes/No
Additional characters: Yes/No
Rest of Info: ref link -- freestyle pose -- with a bowtie


--SLOTS--
1.  ech00 //$20
2.
3.


aaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnndddddddddddd


GO

so school starts tomorrow

I'm so not ready...



Tomorrow night I will open 3 slot. Only 3 slots. One slot is on hold for a friend if they still want it, but otherwise they are all open. Afterwards commissions will be on completely hold (not taking anymore until ever single one I have on my to-do list is complete.)

I will still make designs, adopts, and be on here a lot, but I need to focus mainly on school (or atleast until I can decide if I should continue or get my GED) and I can't do that too well if I'm worried about checking all of my messages on here.


Anyways, school starts tomorrow, 3 commission slots open tomorrow, and then I'm not taking anymore till all I have is finished.


here's some useful links

Prices>> http://palesmokecommissions.weebly.com/
To-do List>> http://sta.sh/0dde2a4ews1

If you have any question, let me know

So a surprise from my mum, she said I could get another baby leopard gecko! Which is really cool since I'v been getting ready to get another one for a while now (tho from a friend)

Anyways, we'll be getting them next month (when I get my money again) and the extra stuff we don't currently have rn for them too



So I just wanna know tho, before I get another bab, where YOU guys get your stuff. Like habit/hides/ other things for in their tank. I hate spending a shit load of money on a small little hide from petco (which happened last time.)

What I have:

-20 gallon tank with screen top/ with latches
-Reptile Carpet
-Tempo meter
-heating pad
-some 50 WATT blue lights (which I was told my a fellow leo owner were OK to use)




I like to stick to more natural looking hides and such for them, make them feel more at home and such

also I'd love to see your babies!

oh my jesus these hospital chips are amazing

anyways, I have some important news concerning commissions and all further artwork from now on.

-
-
-
-
-
-
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Okay so as you guy know, school is starting (Sept 9th for me) and so that means not much time to fool around or just do art and nothing else for the day anymore.

I have a plan.

I am going to try and do 2-3 drawings a day, so that I can get my to do list down really quickly before school. Once I finish all of my to do list ( or more than 75% of it) I will be opening commissions again. But only 3 slots.

The reason for only 3 is so that I can finish them quicker and them open more once I complete them.

My new prices & TOS are here for those who don't know
palesmokecommissions.weebly.co…

I hope you all understand & if you have any questions, feel free to ask.


To Do List
http://sta.sh/0dde2a4ews1

feeling like utter crap today so I might rest for a little while and then try and work later.. sigh I wish my stomach didn't feel so upset right now..

maybe it was the mexican..

oh yeah! My website is up! Go check it out guys and tell me what you think!


http://palesmokecommissions.weebly.com/


I really like it..

Basics

Name: Aeron
Nickname: Gecko
Location: Stayton, Oregon
Age: 18
Height: 5'3"
Zodiac sign: Virgo
Pets: 1 fat old dog, 1 leopard gecko and soon to be another little pet//or two
Favorite thing about yourself: my ability to sleep a lot
Worst habit: picking at skin and rocking back and forth // anxiety problems
Fun fact: I can't eat much anymore but I still try to eat my sorrows away. There's a lot of them.

Identity, Sexuality & Personality

Gender identity: no freaking clue (tho she/he/them pronouns are good to use)
Sexual preference: asexual
Romantic preference: uhh demi-romantic I guess, if thats what you're asking. Otherwise I dunno. I like being close and able to be comfortable with people
"Kinsey Scale" score: X: Non'sexual
Relationship status: single as a pringle and ready to mingle
Myers/Briggs type: INFP
Hogwarts house: Slytherin


Routine

"Early Bird" or "Night Owl": night owl usually
First thought in the morning: pee time
Last thought before falling asleep at night: I wonder how long it'll take for me to fall asleep

School/Work

Do you work or are you a student: student
What do you do well: sleep
Where do you see yourself in 5 years: dead

Habits (Do you…?)

Drink:nah
Smoke: mums smoke sometimes goes into my face but otherwise no
Do Drugs: advil and Midol
Exercise: I used too
Have a go-to comfort food: pizza
Have a nervous habit: rocking back and forth // rubbing my wrists together

What is your favorite…?

Physical quality (in yourself): how I can practically see all my veins
In Others: their existence
Mental/emotional quality (in yourself):I can hold things in for a very very long time
Food: mums food
Drink: water & lemonade
Animal: lizards/felines/canines
Colors: greens and teals
Artist/Band/Group: unknown
Author/Poet: too many
Actor/Actress: Dylan O'Brien
Blogger: IDK

I'm gonna pop out a ref sheet here today (hopefully), do some of those saliko trades, and then a few commissions and then my energy willl be drained for the day..

I spent last night and all the way up to 4am working on this one ref & woke up early but have been having a ton of naps today but I'm finally ready to work again.

Wooo!


This for SURE GONNA GET DONE TODAY

Taurine ref sheet
Luciiid saliko art trade
#4's egg adopt

maybe some species designs (I got from others//MYO slots )



BTW GUYS

SCHOOL IS STARTING IN A MONTH

HELP ME

I just want these gone

please buy them from me // they are all marked with a price

http://sta.sh/224usgmda86v?edit=1
http://sta.sh/224usgmda86v?edit=1
http://sta.sh/224usgmda86v?edit=1

please I just want them all gone

comment below with the one(s) you're interested in



and don't buy them to just sell right away or I will hurt you

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/172...../#cid:98811033

I got #15 myself since it was pretty cute and they want the rest gone so

^u^

so I got back a couple hours ago but I'v been busy with some things till now

SO the appointment. I went in, they took my vitals and thats it. I was going to get a pelvic/vaginal exam but I didn't want the male doctor doing it so they pushed that off till they can get me another appointment since they didn't have a female OBGYN there. (which is stupid if you ask me)

Mum and I are probably going to go to another place tho // with insurance this time because we found it kind of weird he didn't tell us anything from what he actually did in the appt. Nothing at all..

plus I was so nervous in the office that I kept freaking stuttering god dammit
I'm so much more comfortable with female doctors and I feel bad for not liking the male ones but.. yeah..


But anyways, a little progress but also not much at all.

I'll let you guys know if anything else happens


// sorry for rambling

so I have an appointment at the clinic for my abdominal pain in 5 days! We'll be one step closer to finding out whats wrong! Ugh I'm so excited!

Tho very nervous cause I have to have a pelvic exam and if your a virgin its hurts worse // tho still hurts if you've had kids from what mum said but yeah.. ow

so again, really nervous but excited!


how the hell do you prepare for one of those tho...

//sorryforweirdjournal

currently have some adopts that I'v been working all day on and will finish really soon here but I wanted to let you guys know a thing

because of issues, I will only be able to post 1 picture a day- to sometimes 2, as I need time to get my life in order and to get out more. I also am going to be seeing the doctor soon about some issues that I'v been having for a while and if I do have what I think it is, I will let you guys know.. maybe

anyways, posting Orci-is adopts tonight/ 6 of them for $5-$10 each & gonna try and finish some Orci-is Egg reveals hopefully tonight


have a wonderful night guys!

So my mum got home and let me borrow $105 and gave me a little extra for the month since I'm broke now

but I made it so that I'm not under at all! I now have around $49 in my bank

We'll still go to my bank tomorrow to get everything sorted out and hopefully I can get that $99 back



thank you to those who commented and btw, since I don't need it, commissions are back to being closed still I finish what I have

EDIT:::

so I tried seeing if I could change it to the monthly plans so I could get refunded since it said right under the fucking box and I had around maybe $10 in my bank in the beginning // with $5 coming in from paypal for my tablet cord money in a few days

the box v
http://sta.sh/01v1fuedh18o

But all it did was add $10 to the amount it took off// making it now $101 that I owe

fuckingc jnzcvfkl hnz

I'm going to my bank in the morning to figure everything out and never going for any "free trails" on any fucking site

---

fucking hate amazon prime

it said it was free but now it charged me $99 WHICH I DON'T FUCKING HAVE
so now my bank account is under -$91

so.. I have no clue what to do... like..

I feel like crying

http://sta.sh/01m86lq7gmwp

I guess I'll open up commissions so I don't get fee'd or in trouble with my mum

I hate too open commissions now since I have ones I still need to do but I have to fix this

ugh

I am crying

prices are here:

http://sta.sh/01wwepjddp96



ugh I'm so fucking pissed off...

I'll do enough commissions to get to $100 to make sure that it won't over do again or something

gskbjdbgfvfucking hell im shaking

so I still have no new cord but I did tape the shit outta my tablet and got it to work for now! Yaaaayyy!

http://pre07.deviantart.net/def3/th.....ko-d91tnyn.jpg

Gonna try and do some work now!

It fell while connected and now the thing won't plug in or work at all

http://pre06.deviantart.net/6b2a/th.....ko-d91q6ql.jpg


sigh...

and the new one that's pretty good is $80 so I have to wait till next month (if I get my money)

so.. I guess a digital drawing hiatus...? I can probably post some traditional doodles but..

not the same..

I'm sorry guys...


/// currently raising some money to get an extra cord now tho

i can't handle a lot of things and stresses right now so I'm gonna be gone for a little while