FA+
Shop
Bluesky
Posted 12 months agoOf course I'm still posting here, but a majority of my activity is relegated over to my Bluesky since I feel a lot more at home over there.
You can follow me there @ https://bsky.app/profile/venomousso.....uy.bsky.social
Everything (or nearly everything) will get cross posted over here, but a lot slower C:
Love ya guys.
You can follow me there @ https://bsky.app/profile/venomousso.....uy.bsky.social
Everything (or nearly everything) will get cross posted over here, but a lot slower C:
Love ya guys.
Selling Adopts: Clokies, Nyap, and more
Posted a year agoHey guys, I'm looking to sell a few adopts I either don't have an interest in any more, or that I never got a chance to use and want others to have the chance instead.
Clokies:
https://toyhou.se/4807004.30
https://toyhou.se/3189207.35
https://toyhou.se/3189459.45
Nyap:
https://toyhou.se/3545078.-60
Misc:
https://toyhou.se/3002386.10
https://toyhou.se/3909336.20
If you're interested in any of them, please comment or send me a message.
Payments through paypal.
Clokies:
https://toyhou.se/4807004.30
https://toyhou.se/3189207.35
https://toyhou.se/3189459.45
Nyap:
https://toyhou.se/3545078.-60
Misc:
https://toyhou.se/3002386.10
https://toyhou.se/3909336.20
If you're interested in any of them, please comment or send me a message.
Payments through paypal.
Thinking about doing Commissions Again
Posted 3 years agoMany of you may know that in 2020 I stopped doing commissions entirely. There were a number of reasons for that, but mostly because I found it stressful.
Most of that stress stemmed from feeling like I wasn't creating fast enough and added onto that was how little I was getting paid vs how much time I put into each piece.
I tried to be okay with it, as it was a sort of hobby/side income to my full time job at the time. But it came to a head eventually and I finally decided that I'd just stop for the foreseeable future.
It's been about two and a half years now since I stopped taking commissions and instead simply create what I want, when I want. And that's *great*! I still plan on that being the majority of how I work.
But, I've been tossing around the idea of taking commissions now and then in the future. I've discussed pricing with a friend and I think we've hashed something out that 100% will be more fair with the amount of time and effort I put into my work (and especially people's commissions)
On top of that, I am considering starting to do adopts once more. I get an itch to create them now and then and I miss doing it.
So, keep your eyes peeled for future openings. C:
Most of that stress stemmed from feeling like I wasn't creating fast enough and added onto that was how little I was getting paid vs how much time I put into each piece.
I tried to be okay with it, as it was a sort of hobby/side income to my full time job at the time. But it came to a head eventually and I finally decided that I'd just stop for the foreseeable future.
It's been about two and a half years now since I stopped taking commissions and instead simply create what I want, when I want. And that's *great*! I still plan on that being the majority of how I work.
But, I've been tossing around the idea of taking commissions now and then in the future. I've discussed pricing with a friend and I think we've hashed something out that 100% will be more fair with the amount of time and effort I put into my work (and especially people's commissions)
On top of that, I am considering starting to do adopts once more. I get an itch to create them now and then and I miss doing it.
So, keep your eyes peeled for future openings. C:
Art Trades?
Posted 3 years agoDo people do art trades any more? Or have the fallen out of fashion?
I was talking to a friend a few weeks back and he said that some people had gotten very 'if you want my art, you have to pay, I don't want your art in return' about them. I haven't done them in years as I simply haven't had the time and to start considering doing them again and hear that is a bit disheartening. (Although, I do get it. People should be paid fairly for their artwork, especially if they're using their skills to make a living).
I'm not sure if/when I would be opening them again. I've got a slew of (mostly fanart) projects I'm working on.
I'm just wondering if it's still a thing at all or if that ship has sailed without my knowing.
I was talking to a friend a few weeks back and he said that some people had gotten very 'if you want my art, you have to pay, I don't want your art in return' about them. I haven't done them in years as I simply haven't had the time and to start considering doing them again and hear that is a bit disheartening. (Although, I do get it. People should be paid fairly for their artwork, especially if they're using their skills to make a living).
I'm not sure if/when I would be opening them again. I've got a slew of (mostly fanart) projects I'm working on.
I'm just wondering if it's still a thing at all or if that ship has sailed without my knowing.
Emergency Sale! Bank Overdraft! D:
Posted 3 years agoHi! D: This morning I woke up to a bank overdraft of nearly $60. I need some help as my next check doesn't come in until Friday!
Closed Species below:
Venomaw - https://toyhou.se/3903361.-10
Wishmaker - https://toyhou.se/195684.-60
Nyap - https://toyhou.se/3545078.-60
For all the other adopts I have available, please follow this link ♥:
https://toyhou.se/VenomousSoliloquy.....s/folder:11534
Closed Species below:
Venomaw - https://toyhou.se/3903361.-10
Wishmaker - https://toyhou.se/195684.-60
Nyap - https://toyhou.se/3545078.-60
For all the other adopts I have available, please follow this link ♥:
https://toyhou.se/VenomousSoliloquy.....s/folder:11534
I just wanna post it
Posted 3 years agoLooking at my gallery, I'm of course noticing the clear gap between posts. From an outsider's perspective, it looks like I'm not drawing at all.
I can assure you that I actually am, though some projects certainly do take a couple of weeks.
I'm chomping at the bit. Because I am doing art for an extended event and I'm not allowed to post any of it until all the artists and work has been revealed.
Do be prepared for a small flood of work once I'm not shackled by keeping things a secret.
I can assure you that I actually am, though some projects certainly do take a couple of weeks.
I'm chomping at the bit. Because I am doing art for an extended event and I'm not allowed to post any of it until all the artists and work has been revealed.
Do be prepared for a small flood of work once I'm not shackled by keeping things a secret.
Hi Guys
Posted 4 years agoObviously my last update was about my top surgery gofundme, which did get a couple of donations, but that all tapered off in the end. Which is fine! I'll get it eventually, if I've waited (nearly) 3 years already, I can wait a bit longer. I mean, sure, it sucks, but at the end of the day it's not something I'm going to allow to devastate my entire life. All of that aside, I have another life update that I've waited... Four months to even say anything about.
Not for any particular reason, mind you. It's not something so life-altering that I had to wait until a specific point to talk about it. No. It's more because I haven't bothered to really settle down and talk at all in a while. I've let life keep me fairly busy. For a while, in the worst of ways, so let me fully get into it instead of delaying any longer.
In my previous journal, I hinted that I'd be starting a new job soon, seeing as how the job I'd currently had was less than conducive in regards to getting a paycheck that was consistent. One week I might work 5 days, the next week I might only work three, yadda yadda. It was at a recycling plant and the major issue was that it was the middle of the winter and the equipment continually broke down. Add on top of that, some days we'd only come in and work half a day. Whether that was because of a breakdown or because they didn't really have anything for us to do. It wasn't that hard of a job, but it was smelly and some of the staff there were less than fantastic. (One particular older man was a huge asshole to a majority of the new people and I'm pretty sure he was racist too. I found out a month after I left they finally fired him, he'd been with the company for 13 years so lmao I'm glad someone finally spoke out against him)
Following that, I started working at a warehouse for TrueValue. Great company technically but... Holy shit. I started right before their busiest time of year. This meant, eventually, working five days a week, eleven to twelve hours a day, even though we were technically scheduled for ten. I woke up every morning at 4:30 or 5am to get there by 6am. I'd go home, normally, around 4:30pm but some days I literally didn't get out until 5 or 6:30pm. Then I'd go home, sometimes pass out an hour after getting home, do it all over again. The pay was AMAZING, I won't lie about that. But the constant pain was not worth it. By the end of the week my body hurt just to move, aching legs, aching back, aching arms. My feet ached to the point of wanting to cry. I tried so many things trying to relieve the pain, compression socks, thicker socks, different shoes, hell eventually frozen rollers. There were days where, on my breaks, I'd pull my feet out of my shoes just to allow them some kind of rest.
Technically... I probably could have continued on there. But, there was a problem. I started in early March and by the time I left it was the beginning of July. In March, it'd been cool and the following weeks it got warmer, but not unbearable. It being a warehouse, I understand that most aren't air conditioned. I'd worked in warehouses before, I knew what it was like to deal with heat. But holy shit. The day I left was one of the worst. My girlfriend had very briefly started working there (and had to be sent home because she blacked out, she quit shortly after that) and that same day I nearly blacked out multiple times as well. It wasn't a dehydration thing, I was sucking down water left, right, and center. I was simply experiencing heat exhaustion. There were fans on each level of the section I was working in (these structures called 'the mods') but myself and the woman I was working with had to keep stopping in front of them just to make it through. Otherwise our clothing was sticking to us, drenched with sweat and it was clear neither of us were feeling all that well.
I decided that day... Well... Originally I was going to put in my two weeks. That day? I said fuck it. I left that evening and never went back. Rash, perhaps... But I literally couldn't take it.
I spent the next three weeks unemployed, though not because I was dilly-dallying around. Each day I put in resumes/applications to practically everywhere (except for fast food lmao no thank you). I didn't care if it was full-time, part-time, I just needed something. Only one place reached out to me promptly enough for me to actually consider an offer (literally, a month later I got a response from hot topic???? lmao) and it happens to be mostly part-time. I was hired to work 26 hours a week, but in recent weeks I've been working between 29 and 32 hours. However, in the case of this job, I'm absolutely not complaining at all. It's practically a dream job. By that, I mean, it's insanely easy and better yet I can draw on the job. What is it?
WELL, essentially I'm a cashier, but not in the sense of ringing up purchases or groceries. Instead, I work at two different locations, depending on where I'm assigned for the day and I man the register for either the pay-to-park lot or pay-to-park garage. Some days, it's super busy, some days it's akin to watching paint dry. But, on those latter days, I can't even begin to complain. Why? Because I'm allowed to do whatever the hell I want to pass the time. If I wanna watch youtube, I can. If I want to play mobile games on my phone, I can. If I want to draw something, I can. And, better yet, I'm encouraged to do so. When I was in the interview it was one of the things that the hiring manager pointed out. He said some people watch movies, some people read books, some people knit, etc.
And this puts me in... Well, a mixed bag of a situation, admittedly. On one hand, I've actually had time, energy, and freedom to draw again! That's where all my newer work has come from!! On the other hand, I took a major pay cut in multiple ways by taking this job. For one, the warehouse job was $15.75 an hour (before overtime, overtime was time + ½ or, $23+ an hour at that point). This job is $10 an hour. Previously I was getting at least 40 hours a week, some weeks 50 to 55. Here, as I've said... Some weeks are more minimal to the point of 26 hours where others are 32 hours. Which means that I'm in far more dire straights with my bills and such than I had been before. Not so bad that I need to worry about not being able to pay anything, but money is considerably tighter.
But... at the end of it all, I'm willing to take it just for the peace of mind and the ability to be creative again. For months I had wanted to create, to draw, to do honestly anything rather than, sleep, work, sleep, work, recover, sleep, work, sleep. For the freedom to do what I want when it's slow and for the far lesser stress. Yes, money being tighter and me being the only one working means that there's that stress, but on the flipside, it's not the absolute deep depression that I was finding myself in before. It's been nice. And, besides, with any luck, I'll be able to stick with this job long enough that perhaps someone will leave or more hours will be freed up and I'll be able to work full time there. That would be awesome!
All of this aside, however, I will say that I haven't been completely squandering my free time! Instead, I've been drawing and working up to the idea of eventually starting my own small business! I wanna open a shop and sell stuff with my art on it. I'm thinking about things like stickers, pins, bookmarks, journals, prints, and all that sort of fun stuff. It's probably at least another six to eight months out still. I have to design all of my branding, for one, and then figure out what to design initially to get the whole thing started. Then I'll have to figure out how much money I'll need just to get things manufactured, depending on what they are. It's a bit of a mess and isn't conducive to not having a lot of free income to shift around. But, I'm trying to look forward with it all the same. If I can't manage to get it going next year, I can always try the year after that.
I've just gotta be patient!
Not for any particular reason, mind you. It's not something so life-altering that I had to wait until a specific point to talk about it. No. It's more because I haven't bothered to really settle down and talk at all in a while. I've let life keep me fairly busy. For a while, in the worst of ways, so let me fully get into it instead of delaying any longer.
In my previous journal, I hinted that I'd be starting a new job soon, seeing as how the job I'd currently had was less than conducive in regards to getting a paycheck that was consistent. One week I might work 5 days, the next week I might only work three, yadda yadda. It was at a recycling plant and the major issue was that it was the middle of the winter and the equipment continually broke down. Add on top of that, some days we'd only come in and work half a day. Whether that was because of a breakdown or because they didn't really have anything for us to do. It wasn't that hard of a job, but it was smelly and some of the staff there were less than fantastic. (One particular older man was a huge asshole to a majority of the new people and I'm pretty sure he was racist too. I found out a month after I left they finally fired him, he'd been with the company for 13 years so lmao I'm glad someone finally spoke out against him)
Following that, I started working at a warehouse for TrueValue. Great company technically but... Holy shit. I started right before their busiest time of year. This meant, eventually, working five days a week, eleven to twelve hours a day, even though we were technically scheduled for ten. I woke up every morning at 4:30 or 5am to get there by 6am. I'd go home, normally, around 4:30pm but some days I literally didn't get out until 5 or 6:30pm. Then I'd go home, sometimes pass out an hour after getting home, do it all over again. The pay was AMAZING, I won't lie about that. But the constant pain was not worth it. By the end of the week my body hurt just to move, aching legs, aching back, aching arms. My feet ached to the point of wanting to cry. I tried so many things trying to relieve the pain, compression socks, thicker socks, different shoes, hell eventually frozen rollers. There were days where, on my breaks, I'd pull my feet out of my shoes just to allow them some kind of rest.
Technically... I probably could have continued on there. But, there was a problem. I started in early March and by the time I left it was the beginning of July. In March, it'd been cool and the following weeks it got warmer, but not unbearable. It being a warehouse, I understand that most aren't air conditioned. I'd worked in warehouses before, I knew what it was like to deal with heat. But holy shit. The day I left was one of the worst. My girlfriend had very briefly started working there (and had to be sent home because she blacked out, she quit shortly after that) and that same day I nearly blacked out multiple times as well. It wasn't a dehydration thing, I was sucking down water left, right, and center. I was simply experiencing heat exhaustion. There were fans on each level of the section I was working in (these structures called 'the mods') but myself and the woman I was working with had to keep stopping in front of them just to make it through. Otherwise our clothing was sticking to us, drenched with sweat and it was clear neither of us were feeling all that well.
I decided that day... Well... Originally I was going to put in my two weeks. That day? I said fuck it. I left that evening and never went back. Rash, perhaps... But I literally couldn't take it.
I spent the next three weeks unemployed, though not because I was dilly-dallying around. Each day I put in resumes/applications to practically everywhere (except for fast food lmao no thank you). I didn't care if it was full-time, part-time, I just needed something. Only one place reached out to me promptly enough for me to actually consider an offer (literally, a month later I got a response from hot topic???? lmao) and it happens to be mostly part-time. I was hired to work 26 hours a week, but in recent weeks I've been working between 29 and 32 hours. However, in the case of this job, I'm absolutely not complaining at all. It's practically a dream job. By that, I mean, it's insanely easy and better yet I can draw on the job. What is it?
WELL, essentially I'm a cashier, but not in the sense of ringing up purchases or groceries. Instead, I work at two different locations, depending on where I'm assigned for the day and I man the register for either the pay-to-park lot or pay-to-park garage. Some days, it's super busy, some days it's akin to watching paint dry. But, on those latter days, I can't even begin to complain. Why? Because I'm allowed to do whatever the hell I want to pass the time. If I wanna watch youtube, I can. If I want to play mobile games on my phone, I can. If I want to draw something, I can. And, better yet, I'm encouraged to do so. When I was in the interview it was one of the things that the hiring manager pointed out. He said some people watch movies, some people read books, some people knit, etc.
And this puts me in... Well, a mixed bag of a situation, admittedly. On one hand, I've actually had time, energy, and freedom to draw again! That's where all my newer work has come from!! On the other hand, I took a major pay cut in multiple ways by taking this job. For one, the warehouse job was $15.75 an hour (before overtime, overtime was time + ½ or, $23+ an hour at that point). This job is $10 an hour. Previously I was getting at least 40 hours a week, some weeks 50 to 55. Here, as I've said... Some weeks are more minimal to the point of 26 hours where others are 32 hours. Which means that I'm in far more dire straights with my bills and such than I had been before. Not so bad that I need to worry about not being able to pay anything, but money is considerably tighter.
But... at the end of it all, I'm willing to take it just for the peace of mind and the ability to be creative again. For months I had wanted to create, to draw, to do honestly anything rather than, sleep, work, sleep, work, recover, sleep, work, sleep. For the freedom to do what I want when it's slow and for the far lesser stress. Yes, money being tighter and me being the only one working means that there's that stress, but on the flipside, it's not the absolute deep depression that I was finding myself in before. It's been nice. And, besides, with any luck, I'll be able to stick with this job long enough that perhaps someone will leave or more hours will be freed up and I'll be able to work full time there. That would be awesome!
All of this aside, however, I will say that I haven't been completely squandering my free time! Instead, I've been drawing and working up to the idea of eventually starting my own small business! I wanna open a shop and sell stuff with my art on it. I'm thinking about things like stickers, pins, bookmarks, journals, prints, and all that sort of fun stuff. It's probably at least another six to eight months out still. I have to design all of my branding, for one, and then figure out what to design initially to get the whole thing started. Then I'll have to figure out how much money I'll need just to get things manufactured, depending on what they are. It's a bit of a mess and isn't conducive to not having a lot of free income to shift around. But, I'm trying to look forward with it all the same. If I can't manage to get it going next year, I can always try the year after that.
I've just gotta be patient!
Top Surgery GoFundMe!
Posted 4 years agoHi guys! C:
As many of you know, I'm a trans man, I've been on hormones for over 2 years now!!
Originally, I had planned on saving for and getting top surgery sometime in 2019, however, due to many factors (some self-made), that never happened.
And then Coronavirus hit and... Well...
I do have a job (I'm actually starting a new one soon-ish, because the one I got in January has been all over the place as far as getting hours and I cannot take the stress of not getting a full paycheck) and I have finally been able to start actually saving, but if I can get some help along the way, it would be greatly appreciated. As such, I've started a GoFundMe! C:
You can find it here!
Any and all help, even if it's just a share is greatly appreciated!
Thanks in advance!
As many of you know, I'm a trans man, I've been on hormones for over 2 years now!!
Originally, I had planned on saving for and getting top surgery sometime in 2019, however, due to many factors (some self-made), that never happened.
And then Coronavirus hit and... Well...
I do have a job (I'm actually starting a new one soon-ish, because the one I got in January has been all over the place as far as getting hours and I cannot take the stress of not getting a full paycheck) and I have finally been able to start actually saving, but if I can get some help along the way, it would be greatly appreciated. As such, I've started a GoFundMe! C:
You can find it here!
Any and all help, even if it's just a share is greatly appreciated!
Thanks in advance!
Hello Again
Posted 5 years agoHi everyone!
Long time no see and long time no update. I can't say there's really been a whole lot going on over on my end. I've barely been drawing let alone much else.
I did, however, make it to Pennsylvania safe and sound. I've just been working a lot since then. Started out at Walmart for about 3 months and now have since moved on to a recycling facility.
I'm sorry I haven't been around much. I just haven't been interested to be around much of anywhere since I haven't had anything to upload/share
With my newer job, however, I have more free time and I'm not anywhere near as exhausted all of the time, so I should be able to draw a lot more. When I'm not playing video games, obvs lmao
How are y'all doing?
Long time no see and long time no update. I can't say there's really been a whole lot going on over on my end. I've barely been drawing let alone much else.
I did, however, make it to Pennsylvania safe and sound. I've just been working a lot since then. Started out at Walmart for about 3 months and now have since moved on to a recycling facility.
I'm sorry I haven't been around much. I just haven't been interested to be around much of anywhere since I haven't had anything to upload/share
With my newer job, however, I have more free time and I'm not anywhere near as exhausted all of the time, so I should be able to draw a lot more. When I'm not playing video games, obvs lmao
How are y'all doing?
A Long Overdue Series of Updates
Posted 5 years agoHi all, it's been quite a while. Based on looking at my other journals, an entire six months has passed since my previous ones.
Update #1: Finances
I was previously having a breakdown about my living situation and the state of my finances. It all culminated in me, quite literally, having a panic attack and sobbing for days on end. In the end, in late January, I talked with my managers at work, one of them in particular, and with their help decided that I would file for bankruptcy. A day after deciding to do so, I called a few different places and got three consultations set up. I ended up going to just one consultation and I liked attorney so much that I canceled my other consultations. It took me another month to fill out the paperwork and ensure I didn't forget anything. (And then I still forgot that my mom was a co-signer on one of my credit cards lmao So that was an adventure, but it was a simple fix). The petition was filed in late April and my 341 meeting (meeting of creditors) happened on May 28th. I'm now in the waiting period for anyone to object to my bankruptcy. I have roughly another three-ish weeks until that is finally over and then I just have to get my discharge. If I do, I'm in the clear, and my debt will be wiped out and I can start over. Of course, to the detriment of my credit score, but with time I'll be able to rebuild that. It's a fantastic weight that has been lifted from my shoulders. I can now, hopefully, become more financially responsible and not be caught in the exhausting loop of charging my cards full and then struggling to pay off the balances.
Update #2: Moving
Also, previously, I had said that I would be moving to Pennsylvania in July. Then I said 'never mind', as it turned out that I wasn't going to be getting the money I needed to move from my taxes (in fact I owed money) and I'd have no way to really save much of anything because of the whole drowning in debt and having to pay more rent thing. Well... as stated above, I decided to file for bankruptcy. Then, right after I turned in my worksheets for my petition to the attorney's office, the pandemic hit and I was taken out of work on furlough for two and a half weeks. Then, the stimulus checks happened. I went back to work after those two and a half weeks and had to wait a while for my stimulus check to come in the mail (as the bank account I'd used to pay my taxes had been closed by me for a few reasons, mostly relating to stopping certain payments and ensuring my bank account wouldn't be frozen during the bankruptcy). Because of the bankruptcy and not needing to pay practically entire checks to debt, I've been able to save quite a bit of money (aside from attorney fees), then add in the stimulus which I've technically still not used and I'll actually have enough money to move. I am, however, not moving this month. Instead I am moving on the 20th of August, so roughly six weeks away. I will be moving in with my girlfriend and her parents for the time being so that she and I can get ourselves properly on our feet and she can finish up her college. It's still exciting, regardless and I'm hoping things go well, as she and I have been together for almost 2 years. (2 years in on September 1st)
Update #3: Transition
Anyone who has paid attention to my front page and a few other things knows that I am a transgender guy. Somewhat enby transgender, but still a transgender guy. I started taking testosterone in November of 2018, so my second year is nearing for that as well. There's been many, many changes, but I'm definitely still in the very beginning of my transition and there's a few more things I'll need to do before I finally hit a point where I'm more comfortable and less worried about what I might need to do next to 'pass'. One of those thing will be changing my name, which I haven't decided if that will be before or after the other important thing. Which is, top surgery. For those who don't know, I'm quite well endowed in the chest region and that causes me the most dysphoria. I'm so well endowed that no amount of binding helps or flattens me out to a point where I actually pass. Most of my passing is in my face. I've had people look me in the face and say 'sir' only to look down and see even the barest hint of rise and call me 'miss'. It's... frustrating. As such, I'd like to get top surgery sooner rather than later. the last few months have been spent off and on looking up top surgery surgeons and understanding what I might have to do in order to get top surgery. Very recently, however, I think I've figured out who I'm going to choose as my surgeon. It's still likely well over a year off, but I've decided on Dr. Hope Sherie. She's located in North Carolina which is about 9 hours away from Pennsylvania. A bit of a trip but nothing absolutely terrible. There were a number of factors for why I decided I'll likely go with her. Partly because there are lots and lots of pictures and reviews for her, including on r/FTM. And also, partly, because she does top surgery on a 'informed consent' method, which means I don't have to go through therapist psychoanalysis just to get the go ahead. While I understand the importance of psychoanalysis and ensuring if people are ready to take large, irreversable steps... At the same time, I don't want someone sitting there telling me that I'm not 'ready' to do something that I've wanted to do since late 2017 when I finally admitted I was actually transgender. (for the record, also, I will be getting another therapist once I have insurance again, I'm just able to avoid needing to get the letter and all that)
All of that aside, if I want to even possibly get top surgery within the next year (even if it's late 2021), this means I will need to save up money. From my research, I've gathered that Dr. Sherie's fees are between $7.5k and $9k. Between me and my girlfriend and pooling our money together, it shouldn't be too hard for us to save up $10k to $12k to cover the surgery costs and anything else. But, it will still take some disipline and planning and controlling urges to splurge money away needlessly. Somewhere between now and then, I know I'm going to drop a good chunk of money on a new iPad Pro. So... priorities. lmao But, it seems more feasible than ever that I should be able to do this. I truly hope so. I just hope, wherever I happen to be working, I don't have to quit that job just to be treated how I should be treated and not seen as 'that weird girl' or some shit.
(if anyone has any suggestions on when to change names and all that fun stuff, feel free to let me know, I'm not sure what's optimal)
Update #1: Finances
I was previously having a breakdown about my living situation and the state of my finances. It all culminated in me, quite literally, having a panic attack and sobbing for days on end. In the end, in late January, I talked with my managers at work, one of them in particular, and with their help decided that I would file for bankruptcy. A day after deciding to do so, I called a few different places and got three consultations set up. I ended up going to just one consultation and I liked attorney so much that I canceled my other consultations. It took me another month to fill out the paperwork and ensure I didn't forget anything. (And then I still forgot that my mom was a co-signer on one of my credit cards lmao So that was an adventure, but it was a simple fix). The petition was filed in late April and my 341 meeting (meeting of creditors) happened on May 28th. I'm now in the waiting period for anyone to object to my bankruptcy. I have roughly another three-ish weeks until that is finally over and then I just have to get my discharge. If I do, I'm in the clear, and my debt will be wiped out and I can start over. Of course, to the detriment of my credit score, but with time I'll be able to rebuild that. It's a fantastic weight that has been lifted from my shoulders. I can now, hopefully, become more financially responsible and not be caught in the exhausting loop of charging my cards full and then struggling to pay off the balances.
Update #2: Moving
Also, previously, I had said that I would be moving to Pennsylvania in July. Then I said 'never mind', as it turned out that I wasn't going to be getting the money I needed to move from my taxes (in fact I owed money) and I'd have no way to really save much of anything because of the whole drowning in debt and having to pay more rent thing. Well... as stated above, I decided to file for bankruptcy. Then, right after I turned in my worksheets for my petition to the attorney's office, the pandemic hit and I was taken out of work on furlough for two and a half weeks. Then, the stimulus checks happened. I went back to work after those two and a half weeks and had to wait a while for my stimulus check to come in the mail (as the bank account I'd used to pay my taxes had been closed by me for a few reasons, mostly relating to stopping certain payments and ensuring my bank account wouldn't be frozen during the bankruptcy). Because of the bankruptcy and not needing to pay practically entire checks to debt, I've been able to save quite a bit of money (aside from attorney fees), then add in the stimulus which I've technically still not used and I'll actually have enough money to move. I am, however, not moving this month. Instead I am moving on the 20th of August, so roughly six weeks away. I will be moving in with my girlfriend and her parents for the time being so that she and I can get ourselves properly on our feet and she can finish up her college. It's still exciting, regardless and I'm hoping things go well, as she and I have been together for almost 2 years. (2 years in on September 1st)
Update #3: Transition
Anyone who has paid attention to my front page and a few other things knows that I am a transgender guy. Somewhat enby transgender, but still a transgender guy. I started taking testosterone in November of 2018, so my second year is nearing for that as well. There's been many, many changes, but I'm definitely still in the very beginning of my transition and there's a few more things I'll need to do before I finally hit a point where I'm more comfortable and less worried about what I might need to do next to 'pass'. One of those thing will be changing my name, which I haven't decided if that will be before or after the other important thing. Which is, top surgery. For those who don't know, I'm quite well endowed in the chest region and that causes me the most dysphoria. I'm so well endowed that no amount of binding helps or flattens me out to a point where I actually pass. Most of my passing is in my face. I've had people look me in the face and say 'sir' only to look down and see even the barest hint of rise and call me 'miss'. It's... frustrating. As such, I'd like to get top surgery sooner rather than later. the last few months have been spent off and on looking up top surgery surgeons and understanding what I might have to do in order to get top surgery. Very recently, however, I think I've figured out who I'm going to choose as my surgeon. It's still likely well over a year off, but I've decided on Dr. Hope Sherie. She's located in North Carolina which is about 9 hours away from Pennsylvania. A bit of a trip but nothing absolutely terrible. There were a number of factors for why I decided I'll likely go with her. Partly because there are lots and lots of pictures and reviews for her, including on r/FTM. And also, partly, because she does top surgery on a 'informed consent' method, which means I don't have to go through therapist psychoanalysis just to get the go ahead. While I understand the importance of psychoanalysis and ensuring if people are ready to take large, irreversable steps... At the same time, I don't want someone sitting there telling me that I'm not 'ready' to do something that I've wanted to do since late 2017 when I finally admitted I was actually transgender. (for the record, also, I will be getting another therapist once I have insurance again, I'm just able to avoid needing to get the letter and all that)
All of that aside, if I want to even possibly get top surgery within the next year (even if it's late 2021), this means I will need to save up money. From my research, I've gathered that Dr. Sherie's fees are between $7.5k and $9k. Between me and my girlfriend and pooling our money together, it shouldn't be too hard for us to save up $10k to $12k to cover the surgery costs and anything else. But, it will still take some disipline and planning and controlling urges to splurge money away needlessly. Somewhere between now and then, I know I'm going to drop a good chunk of money on a new iPad Pro. So... priorities. lmao But, it seems more feasible than ever that I should be able to do this. I truly hope so. I just hope, wherever I happen to be working, I don't have to quit that job just to be treated how I should be treated and not seen as 'that weird girl' or some shit.
(if anyone has any suggestions on when to change names and all that fun stuff, feel free to let me know, I'm not sure what's optimal)
When it rains, it pours
Posted 6 years agoSo, there's more shit just stacking onto my plate and I'm at a point where I just... Can't.
I've spent today crying off and on, including while at work, which is just fucking embarrassing.
Essentially, here's the basics;
Mom and Dad have separated, but dad still lives here. Despite that, dad is not helping to pay the rent.
Normally I was paying $100 to $200 a month in rent to my parents (their money covered it so it was more like food money for them), I am now paying $400 a month.
Dad is supposed to be leaving at the end of January, but now he probably won't be gone until the middle of February or something. All because he's not sure about his current job.
And he refuses to look for a place until he knows.
Taxes bit me in the ass this year, I am getting a smidge back from them, but I owe some money to state.
Because of this, despite the fact that I am now living almost entirely beyond my means between minimum payments to my debt and $400 in rent, I will not be doing any commissions or anything of the sort this year. I am exhausted with trying to figure out taxes and stressing out about them in regards to self-employment income. I want a break. I'm burnt out even thinking about commissions.
I am stressed beyond belief and I honestly don't know what to do at this point.
Tack on top of that, my girlfriend won't be graduating until NEXT year instead of this year. 😩😩😩
I'm currently at a point where I'm probably going to have to try to find a part-time job, on top of my full-time job. Just to help me pay my debt down at least somewhat... And *save, save, save* to possibly move next year to be with my girlfriend.
I'm scared. I'm anxious. I'm stressed out. And it's so fucking stupid because it's only 9 days into the new year.
FUCK.
😩😩😩😩
I've spent today crying off and on, including while at work, which is just fucking embarrassing.
Essentially, here's the basics;
Mom and Dad have separated, but dad still lives here. Despite that, dad is not helping to pay the rent.
Normally I was paying $100 to $200 a month in rent to my parents (their money covered it so it was more like food money for them), I am now paying $400 a month.
Dad is supposed to be leaving at the end of January, but now he probably won't be gone until the middle of February or something. All because he's not sure about his current job.
And he refuses to look for a place until he knows.
Taxes bit me in the ass this year, I am getting a smidge back from them, but I owe some money to state.
Because of this, despite the fact that I am now living almost entirely beyond my means between minimum payments to my debt and $400 in rent, I will not be doing any commissions or anything of the sort this year. I am exhausted with trying to figure out taxes and stressing out about them in regards to self-employment income. I want a break. I'm burnt out even thinking about commissions.
I am stressed beyond belief and I honestly don't know what to do at this point.
Tack on top of that, my girlfriend won't be graduating until NEXT year instead of this year. 😩😩😩
I'm currently at a point where I'm probably going to have to try to find a part-time job, on top of my full-time job. Just to help me pay my debt down at least somewhat... And *save, save, save* to possibly move next year to be with my girlfriend.
I'm scared. I'm anxious. I'm stressed out. And it's so fucking stupid because it's only 9 days into the new year.
FUCK.
😩😩😩😩
Nevermind about that last journal
Posted 6 years agoAs it turns out, there's essentially no way I'm going to have a spare $5000 in the next six months.
So, despite the fact that it pains me greatly, I'm going to have to stay where I am, away from my girlfriend, for at least another year or so.
I don't like it, at all. I want to be with her. But, after doing my taxes last night, I found out that I'm going to owe on them, rather than getting anything back.
It's, thankfully, only $58 dollars total, between state and federal, but it's absolutely nervewracking.
On the plus side of things, this will give me more time to work on paying down credit cards. So, I'll take what I can get. It just sucks, a lot.
I'm also on the fence about how much art I'll be selling this year. I'm considering mostly selling adopts, as commissions are extremely stressful burdens on top of everything else in my life.
But we shall see. Thanks for the well wishes on the previous journal, from those who left them.
So, despite the fact that it pains me greatly, I'm going to have to stay where I am, away from my girlfriend, for at least another year or so.
I don't like it, at all. I want to be with her. But, after doing my taxes last night, I found out that I'm going to owe on them, rather than getting anything back.
It's, thankfully, only $58 dollars total, between state and federal, but it's absolutely nervewracking.
On the plus side of things, this will give me more time to work on paying down credit cards. So, I'll take what I can get. It just sucks, a lot.
I'm also on the fence about how much art I'll be selling this year. I'm considering mostly selling adopts, as commissions are extremely stressful burdens on top of everything else in my life.
But we shall see. Thanks for the well wishes on the previous journal, from those who left them.
Moving to Pennsylvania this July
Posted 6 years agoHeyo! Been a while since I've updated here. Life has been pretty hectic and pretty busy.
But, as the title says, I will be moving to pennsylvania this coming July. The choice and need to do this has become rather sudden.
I've been given a decent amount of time to save up for it and I will be busting ass to do what I can, but I fear I will still need some help. As such, I've started a gofundme
gf.me/u/w9mt8c
Obviously no one is obligated to donate, but if you do, I will be absolutely so grateful. ♥
Mass Character Purge~
Posted 6 years agoEmergency Sale! Please have a look! ♥
Many, many designs up for sale, including those by, Nadopt, Lysandre, Blackberreh, Melbaka, etc
And species such as; Nyaps, Lumi, Wishmaker, Roseilorn, Clokie, etc
If you are interested please go here;
https://toyhou.se/VenomousSoliloquy.....s/folder:11534
Comment or PM to claim!
Many, many designs up for sale, including those by, Nadopt, Lysandre, Blackberreh, Melbaka, etc
And species such as; Nyaps, Lumi, Wishmaker, Roseilorn, Clokie, etc
If you are interested please go here;
https://toyhou.se/VenomousSoliloquy.....s/folder:11534
Comment or PM to claim!
Seeking Artists -- Draw my snake boyo?
Posted 6 years ago
Hello all~
So, I have another character I'd like to get more art of, but I'm seeking artists who are comfortable with a few things.
• Human-faced anthro characters
• Fantastical Intersex anatomy*; ie. penis in place of clit, but otherwise a normal looking vagina
• Pregnancy/Pregnancy kink*; character has fully functioning organs in order to become pregnant and because of his sordid past has a kink/fetish for becoming pregnant
*these two stipulations only matter if I'm getting NSFW art from you
The character in question is my snake boi, Nathair
If anyone would be interested in drawing him, please leave a comment below! I shall make some decisions when I get my paycheck on friday~
Anyone Comfortable Doing Fanart Commissions?
Posted 7 years ago> 3> I'm usually quite tentative about asking for this sort of thing, as I know a lot of people aren't that comfortable with it and legally it's kinda..... grey area.
But, I'm in the yearly 'OBSESSED WITH BIOSHOCK' mood, and each year that comes with an obsession with Jatlas (Jack/Atlas) from the first game. lol
So, needless to say, I'd love to get some commissions of them.
If anyone is down with that sort of thing, please comment here~ And thanks in advance c:
Looking for people to Commission
Posted 7 years agoI will be picky, please keep this in mind
Specifically I am looking for people to commission for bloody/gory/halloween style commissions of my character Saverio in one of these three forms:
version 1 | version 2 | version 3
I won't be commissioning immediately, as my next check isn't until next friday, but I'd like to put this out there so people can comment with prices/examples/etc ahead of time. Reminder that this character is a human and until I design his werewolf form, he will only have humanoid forms (still designing a naga version of him, but even that one is humanoid on the upper body). I know this isn't everyone's cup of tea for drawing, so please keep this in mind before commenting. Thanks in advance!Updated about Adult Art
Posted 7 years agoI want to thank everyone who responded to my last journal, it's greatly appreciated. It was good to see at least most of the people who are most active viewing my stuff are okay with what I was proposing. So, that said, I have an update. I will be archiving my 
account. It's served me well, and I plan on continuing to use the name on some of my other sites. (Namely Y!Gallery when it comes back and HentaiFoundry). This means all adult art will simply be posted here instead. I WILL put proper warnings on all images, and if I feel something is exceptionally... mature or graphic, I will possibly make some preview images with warnings of content. My NSFW/Adult images will include; sexual nudity, sex/porn in general, gore/blood/guro, and some dub-con. I understand if some people want to unfollow me over it, all the power to those who wish to do so. But, as stated previously, my art has evolved to such a point that it feels redundant to have an adult account on this site.
I'll probably make a general warnings journal to pin to my front page later~
Thanks again guys!Question About Adult Art
Posted 7 years agoHey-o, been a while since I've written an actual journal. Mostly been posting about selling adopts and the like (which, yes, I still am)
However, this has been on my mind for a while, and I figured I'd reach out some feelers and see what people say.
As many of you know, I have an adult account on here and for some of you, you greatly appreciate that.
I know a few people have thanked me for separating my adult art from my more general art.
That being said, over time, trying to keep up with two accounts has been a pain and I draw actual adult art so little enough, it almost seems pointless to have it sequestered onto another account. But, furthermore, I have to finally admit to everyone that I am primarily a fetish artist. Even my PG/G rated art frequently has something mildly fetishy to it. Whether it's making it obvious how much I like wide hips or the way I draw eyes and lips and the like. So, it further feels pointless to separate my outright 100% naughty work, from my more mild 'naughty' work and what have you.
I understand losing watchers if I go through with this.
Overall, though, I'd like to know how y'all feel about this?
Would you be okay with it? If yes or no, then why?
Everything that is already on aen will stay over there, as I'm not in the mood to be transfering pictures around.
But, if I go through with this, that account will basically become an archive.
Thanks for your opinions!
However, this has been on my mind for a while, and I figured I'd reach out some feelers and see what people say.
As many of you know, I have an adult account on here
and for some of you, you greatly appreciate that.I know a few people have thanked me for separating my adult art from my more general art.
That being said, over time, trying to keep up with two accounts has been a pain and I draw actual adult art so little enough, it almost seems pointless to have it sequestered onto another account. But, furthermore, I have to finally admit to everyone that I am primarily a fetish artist. Even my PG/G rated art frequently has something mildly fetishy to it. Whether it's making it obvious how much I like wide hips or the way I draw eyes and lips and the like. So, it further feels pointless to separate my outright 100% naughty work, from my more mild 'naughty' work and what have you.
I understand losing watchers if I go through with this.
Overall, though, I'd like to know how y'all feel about this?
Would you be okay with it? If yes or no, then why?
Everything that is already on aen will stay over there, as I'm not in the mood to be transfering pictures around.
But, if I go through with this, that account will basically become an archive.
Thanks for your opinions!
Eyyy~ Come check out this fab raffle!!
Posted 7 years agohttps://www.furaffinity.net/view/27764475/
👀 This is totally awesome and everyone should join in! :D
👀 This is totally awesome and everyone should join in! :D
[CLOSED!!] Flat Color Chibi Commission
Posted 8 years agoSo, I am offering up something quick and cute for y'all!
I am opening commissions for a chibi similar to these:
Example 1 || Example 2
If you are interested, please comment or note me.
Please include the character you want, pose and/or expression if you have preferences, etc
I'll be glad to make it festive too of course!
Thanks so much in advance!!
SLOT HAS BEEN CLAIMED THANK YOU! ♥
Tiered PWYW Grayscale Commissions -- OPEN!
Posted 8 years ago
Hello everyone! I've decided to open up commissions again, since I'm really enjoying doing grayscale and I need some extra dosh.
These are tiered meaning depending on how much you pay, it will change how big the drawing is. (ie, headshot, half body, full body)
These prices are for single characters only.
if you are wanting two characters in an image, please note me and I will discuss it with you
These are fairly quick, but please give me a few days to finish them.
I also have a retail job, and it's the holiday season.
I will keep you updated of any excessive delays.
Prices are as follows:
Headshot; $5 - $9
[example: X]
Half-body; $10 - $14
[example: X]
Fullbody; $15+
Anything over $25+ will also be shaded
***you may also pay more, such as $12 but ask for a headshot instead, and I will shade the image for the additional $$***
If you are interested in one (or more), please fill out this form and either comment below or send me a note!
Slots are unlimited
Type: (headshot, half body, full body, you may choose more than one)
# of pictures: (if you want more than one type, please indicate how many of each)
Reference(s): (drawn/game screenshots only)
How much you are paying: (please be mindful of the above tier guide)
Paypal email: (so I can invoice you ♥)
Check Out My Buddy!
Posted 8 years agoI recently talked a buddy/acquaintance of mine (from a group chat I am in) into making an FA!
They're a furry, and I really think people will enjoy their stuff.
Check them and their awesome art out. ;v; They are really fab!
I may not seem that active, but...
Posted 8 years agolol I am actually pretty darn active. ;P
It just won't seem like it here, because literally every single image I am working on, and planning to work on...
...
Are adult/gory in nature. Ahahahaha.
I do apologize, guys, I do still mostly draw SFW/Vanilla artwork.
But the Outlast fandom, among other things, generally ends with me having lots and lots of nasty/dirty/filthy ideas. ;P
I am still planning on doing some fluffy Outlast art, tho. So at least there's that.
Sketch Commissions -- OPEN
Posted 8 years agoHello all! Due to some financial and technological troubles, I am opening cleaned up, colored sketch commissions! These are more or less sketched, then get a round of smoother sketching, and a layer of flat color and minimal highlights.
Pricing:
Headshot: $7
x | x
Hips/Waist-Up: $12
x | x | x
Full Body: $17
x
(extremely detailed designs, and things like wings will cost extra)
My turn-around time: Most of these take anywhere from one hour to about three or four, depending on complexity. I do, however, work a job anywhere from 3 to 6 days a week, so this may affect times a bit more. Regardless, I will keep you updated with delays, and otherwise make sure I finish these fairly quickly!
Slots: No slots, these are indefinite, until I either reach my goal monetarily, or feel I’ve taken enough.
✔ What I will Draw: Fanart, OCs, Fan OCs, Real People/You, Anthros, Kemonomimi, Fantasy Characters, NSFW, Blood/Gore.
🚫 What I Won’t Draw: Animals, Shota/Lolicon, Things I consider to be ‘Extreme Fetishes’ (ask me), Couples/Groups (for now, may change later)
Contacting me: To request a commission, please send an email to me: Syan.Commissions[at]gmail.com – Please be sure to title it something like ‘commission’ or the like, or it may end up accidentally deleted. You may also contact me through the furaffinity messaging system, though I don’t entirely encourage this.
For your ease, feel free to fill out this form when sending the email.
Username:
# of commissions:
Reference(s): (I need picture references, please!)
Prefered Pose(s) and/or Expression(s): (or just tell me to wing it)
Paypal Email: (so I can send you an invoice ♥)
Pricing:
Headshot: $7
x | x
Hips/Waist-Up: $12
x | x | x
Full Body: $17
x
(extremely detailed designs, and things like wings will cost extra)
My turn-around time: Most of these take anywhere from one hour to about three or four, depending on complexity. I do, however, work a job anywhere from 3 to 6 days a week, so this may affect times a bit more. Regardless, I will keep you updated with delays, and otherwise make sure I finish these fairly quickly!
Slots: No slots, these are indefinite, until I either reach my goal monetarily, or feel I’ve taken enough.
✔ What I will Draw: Fanart, OCs, Fan OCs, Real People/You, Anthros, Kemonomimi, Fantasy Characters, NSFW, Blood/Gore.
🚫 What I Won’t Draw: Animals, Shota/Lolicon, Things I consider to be ‘Extreme Fetishes’ (ask me), Couples/Groups (for now, may change later)
Contacting me: To request a commission, please send an email to me: Syan.Commissions[at]gmail.com – Please be sure to title it something like ‘commission’ or the like, or it may end up accidentally deleted. You may also contact me through the furaffinity messaging system, though I don’t entirely encourage this.
For your ease, feel free to fill out this form when sending the email.
Username:
# of commissions:
Reference(s): (I need picture references, please!)
Prefered Pose(s) and/or Expression(s): (or just tell me to wing it)
Paypal Email: (so I can send you an invoice ♥)
