Sister and I moved dad into a memory care facility today. Large administrative hurdles remain that will take a long time to resolve, getting conservatorship control over dad's finances so I can pay for his care ($10k/month) out of his finances instead of my own to start, but at least I no longer have to provide 24/7 care.

24/7 care means I had to live with him 24/7, except for the relatively brief times my sister or anyone else could provide relief. He wakes up in the middle of the time and meanders, I can't let him out of my sight at any time as he will go for a walk but be unable to find his way back home. He'll lock all the doors of the house, unlock one on the porch, go out that door and walk around to another door but be unable to get in because he had previously locked it, and yell and scream at me for locking the door, completely unable to remember he was the one who had, unable to accept he does things he can't remember doing and yelling at me. Multiple times per day, daily, for months.

I need time to rest, heal and recuperate but, at long last, I can start. Until the financial situation is resolved, I'll still have some money stress, I had to cash out old retirement accounts and even with that, its going to be a tight squeeze to pay his monthly rent and care expenses until a court hearing at the end of May will hopefully give me financial control. My dad set aside money for decades while working, there's plenty there to pay for his care, but its basically in purgatory as he lacks the capacity to make legal decisions (like signing a check, his signature isn't valid), and the only other name on those accounts was my mother/his wife, whom passed away in early February.