Computer scientist, codebreaker, mathematician, war hero, martyr, Cambridge and Princeton alum; Alan Turing (1912 - 1954) was all of these and more. I, personally, am none of them. Dunno why I even brought that up, really. I'm basically a big, stinky dog who writes smutty stories.

A resident of Ohio, which is quite literally one of the states, I spend my time uncovering the mysteries of the universe. Actually I'm a lawyer. Not even a fancy one, just the boring kind. You'll usually find me either at home or at work, because... I mean, yeah, obviously.

I am super duper into tabletop roleplaying games. How bad is it? I *run* D&D, 7th Sea, Legend of the Five Rings, Thirsty Sword Lesbians, Blades in the Dark, Star Wars (Fantasy Flight), Root RPG, Mouse Guard, Blackbirds, and Vampire: The Masquerade. As for how many I play, I'm just going to mumble and avoid eye contact.

I am also a slightly professional writer of words in yon real life. What have I written, you may understandably wonder? Why, there's [redacted because this is a furry website that's 90% porn and I'm not insane], and also my debut collection of short stories, [yeeeeeeah no].

What else, what else. I like to dress in costumes and drink mead with a gaggle of my fellow weirdos, which I sometimes do at an appropriate venue like the Renaissance Festival and sometimes at a less appropriate venue like anywhere else. I'm an avid sport shooter, an infantry veteran, an extremely amateur singer, and a novice cook. My favorite dish to make is barbagiuan, which is a savory pastry stuffed with pumpkin, ricotta, caramelized onion, and leek.

As for the intimate stuff, I'll let my embarrassingly thorough F-List speak for itself. https://www.f-list.net/c/austin%20escher/

Oh, one more thing. I am very happy to take commissions and trades, though I can only write stories. If you want visual art from me, it's going to be a couple of stick figures with pointy ears humping like grad students. If you want to commission or trade for an original tale, let me know, and I'll be pleased to discuss it. It's hard to set fixed rates for writing projects, but I anticipate having a rough price sheet up soon.