currently looking at my commission list.

1. Adamkop
project 1: deck plans for skaven gunboat (turntable complete).
project 2: deck plans for imperial raider + fix bug in raider model with floating turret covers.
project 3: fix bug in arwing model with blue wing texture spasms.
project 4: update covenant light escort model with weapons.
project 5: update covenant supercarrier models with weapons and hangar bays.
project 6: (unstarted) alienlizard123's fox ship turntable (no floor plans, made those myself!).
project 7: (unstarted) covenant CRS-Class Light Cruiser turntable with 20 PPM floor plans (8 decks).

Status: adamkop last wrote back on february 24th 2026, which was six weeks ago. adam typically writes back once every 5 weeks, so i'm not too worried, i am used to long waiting times followed by a lot of progress all at once. however, i have stopped sending him money for new projects. his backlog has allowed me to focus on furry commissions for now.

2. jackunator
project 1: 'vixen' fox synth.

Status: lineart recieved last tuesday, completed image expected anywhere from this friday to this tuesday. jackunator and foxovh are the fastest artists i've ever commissioned.

3. akimafury1232
project 1. river (armello)

Status: flat color WIP update expected this friday.

4. alorix / afallenwolf
project 1. halo/star wars/destiny OC

Status: funded october 1st 2025. a little over half a year ago. lineart WIP update expected this thursday. last commission took over a year. i hope to have this one done before august.

overall, i've been doing a lot of waiting. i have some artists that take a lot longer than others, but i still buy from them since i know i get good results eventually. it's still very frustrating though.


SSSSSIIIIIGHHH

i'm feeling a bit of a slump right now. in 4 weeks i'll be done with the semester (and my 8th year of community college). i've been having a bit of an art block. i know exactly what i want to draw but i've been very low energy lately. furaffinity is really the only place i feel at home because everywhere else is filled with political ragebait from every side and i'm kind of drained. i'm tired of hyperboly-spewing gapemouthed impact font youtube grifters in particular, since youtube does not seem to have the option to blacklist creators from search suggestions or recommendations, and i keep getting the same two shady uber-sponsored political ads, that and AI ads which i'm fairly against AI outside of laboratory research but i don't think they target ads at all for their highest paying sponsors and just churn them out for every viewer. recently, samsung discontinued their native messenger app and now i have to use google's messenger. it's defintely faster at sending images, but it has a gemini button built into it, i need to be signed into my google account to use the app, and trying to simply send a photo from camera roll pulls up the camera app (very disturbing when toilet texting), so i had to block permission to the camera. i really want a grapheneOS pixel phone because my hatred for the tech industry and their luciferian new world order cannot be overstated. i might ask for one from mommy this october in leiu of birthmas money for my big yearly art commission.

since i do not drive or work, and my dad is dead, it was a pretty big inconvenience for my mom to be between jobs for a half year, and right in time for a global recession. we're still recouperating, but for a while i was not financially secure and it was deeply troubling. we lost our house nine years ago in a wildfire and everything i care about keeps getting taken away from me, very stressful.

i'm trying to keep myself focused on my lovely art projects, i've been in closer contact with relatives and family friends, but i crave face-to-face interraction and i don't get much of that due to distance and equally introverted relatives. but i have been getting restaurant food much more frequently, which is nice. it really kind of feels like my life ended in high school a decade ago and now i'm in some purgatory where nothing ever changes besides losing things/people. i'm really looking forward to a next big change like a trip out of state for a week or two.

does anyone else feel the same way? it feels to me like the first 21 years of your life have milestones every couple of years and now it's every 10 years. i'm dreading the big 30 soon.