So I don't really believe in art blocks... I guess that is because, even when I can't draw I will keep drawing until I have done something. This was one of those. But I have definatly got a block of somekind. my head feels so empty when I've tried to draw as of late. Since I've been getting a little more sleep, I feel like my depression is standing even stronger. I may not go to dark places like I may do when I have less sleep more frequently, like depicted. I've gotten to that state with plenty of sleep too... its just frequency. But just recently I've decided that I can no longer stand my job and now most nights before I sleep to have to get up for work. I try to convince myself that dying is the best option out of all the problems. Which in of itself isn't completely irrational. I also do this thing where I try to imagine all these possible senarios and how they all end very badly in terms of quiting my job. No I can't tell you why I want to quit. I like working here. I just can't anymore. I can't keep pretending that I am okay for 8 hours a day. I can't have off days because that wont get things sold. So I am a bit screwed because I have an off life. It really is crazy because like two weeks ago I was doing ace. Like really I was kicking arse at work. before then I was slowly getting fed up- but I could take it. Now I dread it... I've never been a big fan of the idea of having to wake up to exist for another day- one of the biggest reasons why I don't sleep. But now I have something more than my own mortality to feel miserable about- Now I have to contend with the human condition. I hate the world and how it works. I have always disagreed with it even as a child. Now I'm stuck in it... Atleast when I have no sleep I'm too tried to care about being in work- I'm more focused about just making it through the day without passing out.