With the chase closing in, you find Theo's crack security team, but they're a little distracted with themselves! Better hurry, before the room's too small for them!

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Art ©  cedricbrowning
Huck ©  ianthegecko
Harvey Mathis ©  valeyard
Marty & Zen ©  gmxmuscle
Story © c'est moi

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You can feel the pressure mount as Theo drags you through the mansion. The guests are definitely bigger; Lu had spiked more drinks than you thought. You had ample time to think to boot, as you were sandwiched between two tankard sized guts owned by a wolf so overly bloated you don’t think he can walk anymore and a bear so drunk he didn’t even notice you as you were dragged across his swollen middle by Theo’s surprisingly strong grip.

“This is just outrageous,” Theo muttered. “These guests have proportion that are entirely out of… proportion! That wolf was clearly best suited for muscle, look at him! He has no idea how to enjoy that luxurious lard! And that goat has no business carrying around biceps that size. What is he going to do with that? That middle was meant to carry a keg, not a six-pack. What a waste!”

The cheshire is utterly beside himself as you come to a rotunda, leading off to three different corridors. He’s tapping his foot, his zig-zag striped tail swishing madly. “I swear, Mr. Humbug does this just to tweak my whiskers. I was told he was in another dimension and couldn’t attend, only to find out he wanted to crash my party!”

You gently remind him this was Tatsuya’s party, to which the green cheshire swats your hand away. “Anyways, as I was saying about my party, Mr. Humbug does this specifically to vex me.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t know about that, Theo,” you hear a feline purr. You turn around, spotting Lu’s purple and pink pelt. The burly cheshire is smirking wide at Theo, who’s struggling to hold his own smile together. “I thought I was doing you a favor! Lighten things up. You’re getting predictable, old boy. We wouldn’t want Tatsuya to get the wrong idea about being a cheshire.”

“Wrong idea?” Theo visibly twitched. “I am the… Cheshire-est… Cheshire there is! I have clients reaching back for thousands of years.”


“You’re the only one of us that does take clients,” Lu chuckled. “You’re too structured, too organized. Makes me want to just… mess it all up.” The Cheshire apparated right behind Theo, tousling his hair.

“Ah-hahaha, Mr. Humbug!” Theo said through clenched teeth, taking a swing at his pseudo-rival before he disappeared, now resting his elbow on your head. “Very amusing!”

“I think so. I’ll go away if you can just call me Lu.” He winks down at you as you look up.

“Mr. Humbug, I insist you tell me where Tatsuya is right this instant! I have a toast to give to five hundred guests, and if you keep this up, I won’t be able to fit five in my grand ballroom,” he fumed, struggling to hold on to his smile.

“Well, you like big things, right? Don’t you always say things like bigger is better, nothing succeeds like excess? I just want to give you more of what you want. How about a little party game, a good, spirited race to the cellar?” Lu disappeared, saluting Theo from down the hall.

“AFTER HIM!” Theo shouted, charging forward. “My crack security team is just down this corridor, with any luck, they will stop Mr. Humbug from turning my house completely upside down- oof!”

Just as Theo had rushed further down after Lu and turned the corner you heard the shout and a thud. Chasing after the Cheshire you managed to skid to a halt, looking up. Theo was plastered against the ceiling in a pile, groaning as he slowly began to rise to his feet. Mere inches in front of you it seemed the whole house had been flipped on itself, or more that upside-down was now rightside-up. Wincing, you clear your throat and tentatively ask how Theo is.

“Simply marvelous! Never better! I just cannot help wondering why my security team is currently so busy!” The smile on the cat’s face was wide and almost a touch manic. He wasn’t handling Lu’s alterations very well. It likely helped nothing that down the hall was a quartet of guests who seemed to be much more enraptured by themselves than the job they were hired to do.

A mountain of considerable mouse muscle was pumping and posing for himself, looking at the reflection of himself in the mirrors lining the hall. A leather skirt was lifted up quite a bit by his hulking thighs and squeezed by a tightly packed gut, while a red cape was doing very little to cover up the broad expanse of his back. Grinning brightly he stretched his arms out and chuckled. “This is awesome! Oh, how’s the weather down there, Harvey?”

He was speaking to a ram that only came up to his chest, but was no less wide than the mouse. “Oh stuff it Huck, better to be short and wide than an airhead.” The blue mask perched on his face shifted as he frowned and lifted his arms, curling his biceps in a bid to show off his mass, the mounds rubbing against his forearms firmly.

Just beyond them were a familiar pair, Zen and Marty. The quail and wolf were looking a bit different than earlier. While in terms of proportion, Marty hadn’t altered much, but his height has dramatically increased. The bird’s mask was gone and left him in only a speedo as his shoulders and head brushed against the ceiling, or rather the floor given the topsy-turvy state of the hall.

Beside the quail was his boyfriend, Zen. The wolf wasn’t much taller than he was earlier, but he was sporting a great deal more muscle. Pulling his arms forward into a crab pose he grinned from behind his mask, watching his chest and traps swell in the mirror. “Don’t be so grumpy, Harvey. One day you’ll grow up!” He let out a booming laugh as the goat snorted.

“Gentlemen! Might I inquire as to why you have been allowing Mr. Humbug to run about?” The Cheshire was tapping his foot, tail lashing as the corners of his smile twitched.

Huck blinked before grinning sheepishly. “Oh uh, sorry Theo, got a bit distracted after some drinks. It’s no big deal, we can track him down...well, maybe not Harvey if Lu hides on the top shelf.”

“Oh keep laughing it up, rodent!” The ram snorted and crossed his arms, a difficult feat given the size of his pecs and biceps, muscle mashing against muscle.

“Gentlemen, Mr. Humbug will be attempting to get to my wine cellar and wreak havoc on my party!”

You bite your lip, and gently remind Theo, again, that it’s Tatsuya’s party

Whipping around Theo glared at you. “Semantics!” The Cheshire huffs before glancing back at the security detail before blinking at the retreating form of Harvey. “See? That’s initiative!”

Marty grimaced from far above the group. “Not really, he said something about getting himself a good drink to stop all the jokes.”

The cheshire’s eye twitched, his smile almost disappearing. “I can admire you all enough without you all turning into Narcissus! Now kindly detach yourselves from your reflections, and get Mr. Humbug!” Shoving the oversized quail, his boyfriend trailing after him, and urging the mouse forward, Theo lets out a frustrated sigh, gesturing you to follow.

“It’s a bloody good thing he’s gone off to the wine cellar, because I desperately need a drink!”