"Right, so when I wis daeing wrestlin in the indies, I wore a singlet. Ma Dad got me ma first one fur Xmas when I wis sixteen. It wis red, and had the words 'SOD OFF' on the legs.

I wis lovin' it, and I've never loved a Xmas present like it since...

So then I get an offer, in the post. One o' the big leagues that I started watchin' when I was wee, on Sky Sports an' that.

There's a letter in it, real formal, like, almost as though ma Mam wrote it. It's got things like "we've noticed the impact you've made on the independent scene" and "bringing our women's division to the next level" and pish like that.

But I'll tell ye what else wis in it: an illustrated design for the costume they wanted me to wear.

Fuck. It's nice.

All red-an-black, like Minnie the Minx, an' it's got that quality plated skirt thing goin' on. Throw in some Meander patterns on and it'll be perfect.

To be honest, it does have be wanting to sign up with them...

...so I can find the piss-stain who thinks I'd be OK with cutting aboot wi' that short o' a skirt on and force-feed him his own teeth!"

By:  SnapHappy