Howdy y'all

I'm sorry for this. I know you can't turn on any type of tv, phone, or computer without having fearmongering beer virus shit shoved down your throat. In my house, even if I have all electronics turned off, i can STILL hear my mom talking on the phone about it.

I am stressed, depressed, and anxious af. as I'm sure everyone else is right now. I'm not particularly scared of the virus itself, while it's definitely concerning and should be taken seriously, it's no reason to panic

UNFORTUNATELY, I have several types of chronic debilitating anxiety and so while the virus only mildly frightens me, the way people are reacting to it has given me a year's+ worth of panic attacks in a short amount of time!

I am especially PISSED that it happened during my birthday month which I had been anticipating since new years. All the restaurants and fun places to go all shut down LITERALLY ON MY BIRTHDAY

I feel so bad to anyone else who has a bday around this time. I'm so sorry. F

I was also gifted some airline tickets for the end of march which I had to return for credit

So on top of being MASSIVELY anxious I am also pissed

Guys, a huge disaster/apocalypse/society collapsing/the economy collapsing/the healthcare system getting overwhelmed is at the very top of my list of fears. Since I am insulin dependent, I would die a slow painful death if I ran out of meds. I get that for some people, Doomsday prepping and theorizing is fun. And tbh I might think so too, if I was able to fucking survive it. Which I wouldn't.

I do believe there will be a huge disaster or apocalypse during my life time. I do NOT believe that Covid-19 is it, despite the fact it's pretty damn bad. But the empty shelves, the people panicking and stockpiling, the disgusting "every man for himself " behavior, etc is a huge slap in the face reminder that when it does happen I won't survive it (,unless they release the cure for diabetes before then)

I was literally having multiple panic attacks and crying every day ever since this shit went down. I've calmed down a bit. I drew this when I was at my worst and it helped me feel a tad better. I felt so stupid for being scared. It makes me feel weak. I was sitting in my room crying for days as well because I didn't want do panic my sister or family. I felt I had no one to talk to. Luckily I have texting buddies

HUGE shoutout to my texting friends who helped me calm down from panic attacks. I love you all. Thank you.

And I also want to say please PLEASE for the love of the gods please take proper precautions for this outbreak. Just cuz you're healthy and low risk doesn't mean you can't accidentally spread it to someone who could die from it. Please be careful

Lastly, I do have a list of GOOD things this outbreak has caused. I'll make a comic or art with a list soon hopefully

Stay safe everyone