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After Orios the Elvan god has sex and impregnates a woman, he is forced to adapt to the Mortal world, and learn how to breathe and eat....and how to use the bathroom.
Done as a request for
Artha-DemonWolfCat
When you wake up convulsing and being unable to breathe, that could mean several things. It could mean you just went on a bender. It could mean you spent all night on a major acid trip. It could mean you’ve been a lab rat to some sadistic scientists who just experimented the hell outta you and dumped you on the street like common trash. But for Orios, it meant that he was inside the Mortal world yet again. Unbeknown to Orios, he wasn’t the god he used to be. He was mortal now, lying in some alleyway in the middle of Furtopia. Orios is…was an Elvan god, the youngest of his kind, dominating the world with the rest of the Elvan gods he knew. He is 6’3” and has long, black hair and indigo eyes, with a robe that matched his eye color. He is known as the God of Destiny, although he really should be called the God of Trickery, because of his obnoxious and naïve behavior. His father Kraeos trained him and raised him, teaching all of his tricks. Unfortunately, there were no vacancies for the God of Trickery spot so he had to take the God of Destiny title, the same one his father had. Of course, later on he was exiled for betraying the gods but that’s a different story for a totally different day.
Anyway, the god…the elf was in the Mortal world due to all of the bad things he’d done in the past. Orios had traveled to the Mortal world before, but last time he was a god, and he only went there to play his pranks on the furries and human beings he contacted. Whether it was putting way too much magnesium sulfate into a beverage or planting whoopee cushions on chairs or crank-calling someone to make them think they won the lottery or shooting rocks or other objects at someone with his slingshot, he always found a way to amuse himself by causing mischief. But on that day, he got a little “excited” and his hormones began to rage. He saw this wonderful, beautiful female mortal walking down the street. Naturally, Orios walked over to the female and started to have a chat with her. He wasn’t sure what happened afterwards, but he did vaguely remember waking up beside her—on top of her actually—naked. He didn’t bother trying to explain what happened the night before; he just slapped his robe back on and joined the other gods. Since it was his first time in the Mortal world, he didn’t know how things worked. He didn’t know how to sew or send fax or use a telephone or e-mail or pretty much any other thing a mortal would do. He just played pranks and had sex. Unfortunately, his father forgot to warn him that sexual intercourse can and usually would lead to pregnancy. And it just so happened that he left his mark, or sperm, inside the woman he had sex with. And what made the situation better, was that he got her pregnant. He had a good time, but he got her pregnant, which made the gods angry.
As punishment, the gods sent him down to the Mortal world again, with all of his powers stripped away from him. He himself was a mortal now, which meant he had no powers, he was vulnerable to harm, he had to breathe now, all the stuff. Hmm, breathing. Orios seemed to have forgotten how to do that. Maybe that was why he was shaking so much. No, that WAS why he was shaking so much. A wandering furry was walking down the street when he saw the elf in the alley jolting around like crazy. The wolf stopped whistling and walking and backed up a few inches before he realized what was going on. The wolf rushed over to the elf and kneeled down to help him out.
“Oh my God, you’re having a seizure!!”
Somehow, the elf managed to shake his head left and right enough for the wolf to notice he was saying “No”
“Heart attack?”
He shook his head again.
“Stroke?”
More shaking.
“Uh…are you breathing?”
The elf’s eyes dilated and he knew that must’ve been the reason why his chest was so tight and why it felt like he was dying. He wasn’t breathing. His mortal, elf body needed air. And so, Orios opened up his mouth and took in a large breath of fresh air, panting loudly and sitting straight up.
“What-what the hell just happened?”
“I should be asking you the same thing. Why did you stop breathing?”
“Oh, that’s how that works. Wait, what do you mean why? I don’t have to breathe I…wait, you mortals have to breathe?”
“Unless you wanna die, yes.”
“Man that sucks! When I was a god I didn’t have to breathe!!” whined the elf, standing up.
The wolf chuckled. “A god?”
“Yes, a god! The Elvan God of Destiny, who else?!”
“Dude I don’t know who you are. So far you sound like you’re crazy or on methamphetamine.”
“I don’t know what that is. And yes, a god.”
The wolf sighed. “Humor me and tell me what happened.”
“I was a god and I went over to the Mortal world—”
“Mortal world?”
“Well, whatever you call this city. Anyway I went here, played a few pranks and I uh…”
Orios sighed. “I had sex.”
“Damn, you got laid your first visit.”
“Laid?”
“Slang term; continue.”
“Well, when I got back and talked to the gods, they told me the female I had sex with got pregnant.”
“So they banished you to Furtopia—the name of this city—and stripped you of your god-like powers?”
“That’s pretty much it. Hopefully this won’t be permanent but I gotta get used to all of quirks and things you mortals do. Breathing…what the hell kind of word is that?”
While both of them were talking, the elf felt his stomach grumbling and looked down to hear something like pipes chugging very lightly.
“Um, is that normal?”
“No, you must be hungry.”
Orios sighed. “Oh great, now we gotta eat to live too?!”
“Yeah, besides all the food down here tastes good. You ever been to Checkers?”
“What’s a Checkers?”
The wolf and Orios were leaving a local Checkers restaurant, walking down the street while Orios was busy chewing his way through a Bacon Cheddar Crisp burger. He already devoured the Chili Cheeseburger at the restaurant very quickly, as well as finished his extra large drink of Pepsi.
“Oh my God this tastes awesome!” said Orios, taking another bite of the burger with his mouth open.
“Yeah, around here we chew with our mouths closed.”
“Why?”
The second Orios said that word, food came shooting out of his mouth and onto the wolf’s face. He blinked nonchalantly and sighed, wiping the food off.
“Well that’s the main reason.”
“Oh. My bad.”
“You know I really don’t think you should’ve drunk all that Pepsi.”
The elf finished the rest of his cheeseburger and tossed the wrapper aside. “Why?”
“Eventually it’s gotta come out somewhere.”
“What does that mean?”
The elf felt a little more pressure in his abdomen and held his stomach as he tried to soothe the pain.
“Ack…what’s wrong with this mortal body?” he wondered.
He felt a little pressure towards his groin suddenly disappear and he felt something soar out of his body. It didn’t take long before he heard mysterious trickling below him and looked down, noticing his robe was getting wet near his crotch.
“Um…is this normal?”
“Is what normal?”
“Wait a minute, now I feel pressure in my…”
The elf suddenly squatted for an unknown reason and broke wind, which made the wolf raise an eyebrow. He turned around after smelling rotten eggs and was wondering why the elf was squatting down. Orios grunted loudly with his teeth grinding and he started pooping in his robe, letting out a large, solid lump of dung that smelled terrible, like the back end of a hippo or a rhino that hadn’t washed its ass in years.
“What are you doing?”
“I don’t know. I felt some pain in my bowels so I squatted down to see if that would help. All the—”
The elf grunted and let out another foul fart before another large, brown turd plopped down in his trousers.
“All the pain seems to be going away now. Although I am curious; why does the back of my robe feel lumpy?”
“You dumbass! You’re crapping your robe!”
“Crapping?”
“You’re soiling yourself!”
“I’m putting soil all over myself?”
“You are expelling fecal matter into your clothing from your anus!”
The elf quickly stood back up and stopped messing himself. “WHAT!!?”
“You’re soiling your robe!”
“What?! You mortals can’t control your bowel functions?!”
“No, but when we feel that ‘pain’ in our gut we go to the bathroom! We walk inside a bathroom and sit on a toilet and THEN we release the fecal matter!”
“You couldn’t say that before!? And what about the stain on my crotch!”
“That’s urine! That goes in the toilet too!!”
Orios looked down at his robe stain before feeling the lump on his rump and sighed heavily, a little embarrassed about himself.
“Damn, I do not like this mortal thing.”
“Maybe I should take you home and get you cleaned up.”
“That’d be great.”
The elf and the wolf began to walk down the street, the elf feeling major discomfiture.
“So uh, what else do you mortals have to worry about?”
The wolf took out a random wrench and chucked it at the elf in the face. He instantly grabbed his nose and fell flat on his back, groaning in a muffled tone into his cupped hands.
“OH MY GOD!!!”
“That’s called pain.”
“WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT!!?! WHY THE HELL WOULD ANYONE DO THAT TO SOMEONE!!!?”
“I got bored.”
“So you throw wrenches at people!!!?!?”
“Yeah, it’s fun.”
Done as a request for
Artha-DemonWolfCatWhen you wake up convulsing and being unable to breathe, that could mean several things. It could mean you just went on a bender. It could mean you spent all night on a major acid trip. It could mean you’ve been a lab rat to some sadistic scientists who just experimented the hell outta you and dumped you on the street like common trash. But for Orios, it meant that he was inside the Mortal world yet again. Unbeknown to Orios, he wasn’t the god he used to be. He was mortal now, lying in some alleyway in the middle of Furtopia. Orios is…was an Elvan god, the youngest of his kind, dominating the world with the rest of the Elvan gods he knew. He is 6’3” and has long, black hair and indigo eyes, with a robe that matched his eye color. He is known as the God of Destiny, although he really should be called the God of Trickery, because of his obnoxious and naïve behavior. His father Kraeos trained him and raised him, teaching all of his tricks. Unfortunately, there were no vacancies for the God of Trickery spot so he had to take the God of Destiny title, the same one his father had. Of course, later on he was exiled for betraying the gods but that’s a different story for a totally different day.
Anyway, the god…the elf was in the Mortal world due to all of the bad things he’d done in the past. Orios had traveled to the Mortal world before, but last time he was a god, and he only went there to play his pranks on the furries and human beings he contacted. Whether it was putting way too much magnesium sulfate into a beverage or planting whoopee cushions on chairs or crank-calling someone to make them think they won the lottery or shooting rocks or other objects at someone with his slingshot, he always found a way to amuse himself by causing mischief. But on that day, he got a little “excited” and his hormones began to rage. He saw this wonderful, beautiful female mortal walking down the street. Naturally, Orios walked over to the female and started to have a chat with her. He wasn’t sure what happened afterwards, but he did vaguely remember waking up beside her—on top of her actually—naked. He didn’t bother trying to explain what happened the night before; he just slapped his robe back on and joined the other gods. Since it was his first time in the Mortal world, he didn’t know how things worked. He didn’t know how to sew or send fax or use a telephone or e-mail or pretty much any other thing a mortal would do. He just played pranks and had sex. Unfortunately, his father forgot to warn him that sexual intercourse can and usually would lead to pregnancy. And it just so happened that he left his mark, or sperm, inside the woman he had sex with. And what made the situation better, was that he got her pregnant. He had a good time, but he got her pregnant, which made the gods angry.
As punishment, the gods sent him down to the Mortal world again, with all of his powers stripped away from him. He himself was a mortal now, which meant he had no powers, he was vulnerable to harm, he had to breathe now, all the stuff. Hmm, breathing. Orios seemed to have forgotten how to do that. Maybe that was why he was shaking so much. No, that WAS why he was shaking so much. A wandering furry was walking down the street when he saw the elf in the alley jolting around like crazy. The wolf stopped whistling and walking and backed up a few inches before he realized what was going on. The wolf rushed over to the elf and kneeled down to help him out.
“Oh my God, you’re having a seizure!!”
Somehow, the elf managed to shake his head left and right enough for the wolf to notice he was saying “No”
“Heart attack?”
He shook his head again.
“Stroke?”
More shaking.
“Uh…are you breathing?”
The elf’s eyes dilated and he knew that must’ve been the reason why his chest was so tight and why it felt like he was dying. He wasn’t breathing. His mortal, elf body needed air. And so, Orios opened up his mouth and took in a large breath of fresh air, panting loudly and sitting straight up.
“What-what the hell just happened?”
“I should be asking you the same thing. Why did you stop breathing?”
“Oh, that’s how that works. Wait, what do you mean why? I don’t have to breathe I…wait, you mortals have to breathe?”
“Unless you wanna die, yes.”
“Man that sucks! When I was a god I didn’t have to breathe!!” whined the elf, standing up.
The wolf chuckled. “A god?”
“Yes, a god! The Elvan God of Destiny, who else?!”
“Dude I don’t know who you are. So far you sound like you’re crazy or on methamphetamine.”
“I don’t know what that is. And yes, a god.”
The wolf sighed. “Humor me and tell me what happened.”
“I was a god and I went over to the Mortal world—”
“Mortal world?”
“Well, whatever you call this city. Anyway I went here, played a few pranks and I uh…”
Orios sighed. “I had sex.”
“Damn, you got laid your first visit.”
“Laid?”
“Slang term; continue.”
“Well, when I got back and talked to the gods, they told me the female I had sex with got pregnant.”
“So they banished you to Furtopia—the name of this city—and stripped you of your god-like powers?”
“That’s pretty much it. Hopefully this won’t be permanent but I gotta get used to all of quirks and things you mortals do. Breathing…what the hell kind of word is that?”
While both of them were talking, the elf felt his stomach grumbling and looked down to hear something like pipes chugging very lightly.
“Um, is that normal?”
“No, you must be hungry.”
Orios sighed. “Oh great, now we gotta eat to live too?!”
“Yeah, besides all the food down here tastes good. You ever been to Checkers?”
“What’s a Checkers?”
The wolf and Orios were leaving a local Checkers restaurant, walking down the street while Orios was busy chewing his way through a Bacon Cheddar Crisp burger. He already devoured the Chili Cheeseburger at the restaurant very quickly, as well as finished his extra large drink of Pepsi.
“Oh my God this tastes awesome!” said Orios, taking another bite of the burger with his mouth open.
“Yeah, around here we chew with our mouths closed.”
“Why?”
The second Orios said that word, food came shooting out of his mouth and onto the wolf’s face. He blinked nonchalantly and sighed, wiping the food off.
“Well that’s the main reason.”
“Oh. My bad.”
“You know I really don’t think you should’ve drunk all that Pepsi.”
The elf finished the rest of his cheeseburger and tossed the wrapper aside. “Why?”
“Eventually it’s gotta come out somewhere.”
“What does that mean?”
The elf felt a little more pressure in his abdomen and held his stomach as he tried to soothe the pain.
“Ack…what’s wrong with this mortal body?” he wondered.
He felt a little pressure towards his groin suddenly disappear and he felt something soar out of his body. It didn’t take long before he heard mysterious trickling below him and looked down, noticing his robe was getting wet near his crotch.
“Um…is this normal?”
“Is what normal?”
“Wait a minute, now I feel pressure in my…”
The elf suddenly squatted for an unknown reason and broke wind, which made the wolf raise an eyebrow. He turned around after smelling rotten eggs and was wondering why the elf was squatting down. Orios grunted loudly with his teeth grinding and he started pooping in his robe, letting out a large, solid lump of dung that smelled terrible, like the back end of a hippo or a rhino that hadn’t washed its ass in years.
“What are you doing?”
“I don’t know. I felt some pain in my bowels so I squatted down to see if that would help. All the—”
The elf grunted and let out another foul fart before another large, brown turd plopped down in his trousers.
“All the pain seems to be going away now. Although I am curious; why does the back of my robe feel lumpy?”
“You dumbass! You’re crapping your robe!”
“Crapping?”
“You’re soiling yourself!”
“I’m putting soil all over myself?”
“You are expelling fecal matter into your clothing from your anus!”
The elf quickly stood back up and stopped messing himself. “WHAT!!?”
“You’re soiling your robe!”
“What?! You mortals can’t control your bowel functions?!”
“No, but when we feel that ‘pain’ in our gut we go to the bathroom! We walk inside a bathroom and sit on a toilet and THEN we release the fecal matter!”
“You couldn’t say that before!? And what about the stain on my crotch!”
“That’s urine! That goes in the toilet too!!”
Orios looked down at his robe stain before feeling the lump on his rump and sighed heavily, a little embarrassed about himself.
“Damn, I do not like this mortal thing.”
“Maybe I should take you home and get you cleaned up.”
“That’d be great.”
The elf and the wolf began to walk down the street, the elf feeling major discomfiture.
“So uh, what else do you mortals have to worry about?”
The wolf took out a random wrench and chucked it at the elf in the face. He instantly grabbed his nose and fell flat on his back, groaning in a muffled tone into his cupped hands.
“OH MY GOD!!!”
“That’s called pain.”
“WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT!!?! WHY THE HELL WOULD ANYONE DO THAT TO SOMEONE!!!?”
“I got bored.”
“So you throw wrenches at people!!!?!?”
“Yeah, it’s fun.”
Category Story / Fantasy
Species Unspecified / Any
Size 120 x 101px
File Size 41.5 kB
Interesting take on Orios ^^ Though Kraeos wasn't Orios' actual father (Didn't make it clear so I won't nitpick lawl) His actual father was a god named Oranos, who was the God of Destiny and got a little power hungry, raped a Goddes, resulting on Orios who was going to be destroyed on the spot but Kraeos took him in. Orios is naive and mischievous.. the whoopee cushions SO woulda been his thing XD Oranos was later exiled, and Kraeos was forced to put him to Death when he escapd. He's later resurrected by the Fallen Celestial Kubar but that's a whole other story since Kubar along with Oranos and his pet Kitsune become a huge villain in my actual novel. Not sure if Orios faces his father or not, but I know his father tries to turn him but he stays with Kraeos and refuses to betray the one true friend he has... (I am writing a really in depth novel; Orios is a side character, but I've come to adore him, same with Kraeos XD)
one of his favorite tricks is a random banana peel. Kraeos is the only god who will talk to him. One of Kraeos' favorite quotes is "No WONDER the Mortals are so corrupt! Look at the EXAMPLES they have to follow!" Of course the gods get pissed and wanna throw him out but he only points out they'd be proving him right. So Orios was saved by Kraeos; His tricks are always playful, nothing damaging. He PROBABLY woulda gotten away with the whole.. impregnating a Mortal thing, if the other gods didn't hate him XD
Another of Kraeos' favorite quotes is "If you other gods would get off your divine allmighty asses and actually DO something maybe you'd have a follower or two!"
Or "I have something you other gods don't.. A PERSONALITY!" *smirks*
Kraeos taught Orios everything he knows; though Orios developed his trickster nature himself; always playful and often bored. Kraeos sent Orios to the Mortal World to learn a few things, though Orios wasn't Mortal the first time. Kraeos just forgot to warm Orios about the whole.. getting a Mortal pregnant thing. Big oopsie XD
Kraeos eventually gets Orios back to the Realm of the Gods, using his clever use of words. (Mostly pointing out the MANY demigods Zeus has fathered) and got poor Orios off the hook.
Kraeos: *Stands and puts up his hand* Just look at Zeus over there! That horn dog EXPIRIMENTS with Mortals. ON PURPOSE!
Zeus: *shrinks down in his seat*
Kraeos: And you're gonna yell at a young God, for one little mistake? Come on! Zeus is still here in the Council is he not. *Turns to Zeus* Seducing a woman in the form of a Swan. A Swan! Who the frick fucks some woman as a SWAN? And what kind of Mortal would fuck a SWAN???
LOL sorry about the text wall..>.>
Let's just say he never impregnated a Mortal again LOL
one of his favorite tricks is a random banana peel. Kraeos is the only god who will talk to him. One of Kraeos' favorite quotes is "No WONDER the Mortals are so corrupt! Look at the EXAMPLES they have to follow!" Of course the gods get pissed and wanna throw him out but he only points out they'd be proving him right. So Orios was saved by Kraeos; His tricks are always playful, nothing damaging. He PROBABLY woulda gotten away with the whole.. impregnating a Mortal thing, if the other gods didn't hate him XD
Another of Kraeos' favorite quotes is "If you other gods would get off your divine allmighty asses and actually DO something maybe you'd have a follower or two!"
Or "I have something you other gods don't.. A PERSONALITY!" *smirks*
Kraeos taught Orios everything he knows; though Orios developed his trickster nature himself; always playful and often bored. Kraeos sent Orios to the Mortal World to learn a few things, though Orios wasn't Mortal the first time. Kraeos just forgot to warm Orios about the whole.. getting a Mortal pregnant thing. Big oopsie XD
Kraeos eventually gets Orios back to the Realm of the Gods, using his clever use of words. (Mostly pointing out the MANY demigods Zeus has fathered) and got poor Orios off the hook.
Kraeos: *Stands and puts up his hand* Just look at Zeus over there! That horn dog EXPIRIMENTS with Mortals. ON PURPOSE!
Zeus: *shrinks down in his seat*
Kraeos: And you're gonna yell at a young God, for one little mistake? Come on! Zeus is still here in the Council is he not. *Turns to Zeus* Seducing a woman in the form of a Swan. A Swan! Who the frick fucks some woman as a SWAN? And what kind of Mortal would fuck a SWAN???
LOL sorry about the text wall..>.>
Let's just say he never impregnated a Mortal again LOL
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