EMERGENCY UPDATES!
3 years ago
Hey guys. Its been quite awhile, hasnt it? I do owe you all an update, as it has been months after me claiming to have come back.... let me explain a little bit.
When i came back, i was overwhelemed with messages, comments, requests, all sorts of things i guess i was just not prepared for at the time. I thought i was mentally ready to handle it all, and ended up having another horrible mental break. I was embarassed to say the least. Embarassed, caught up, and utterly defeated.. once again. And still have tons of stuff that i need to do. It was shitty, and it was unfair of me to claim i was coming back and end up being not atrong enough mentally to handle it. So these past couple of months, ive been taking things slowly, trying to work on commissions as much as possible, i even have atuff completed ive just been.. too scared to upload.
But, i want to. I want to come back, maybe in a smaller way than before, steadily and easily, so that i can prevail.
Some life updates, i had moved out of the horrendous situation i was in, but due to financial difficulty and me basically refusing to ask anyone for help or reach out.. landed me right back at my brothers. And, he pulled the rug right out from under me as soon as that happened. Apparently, he had planned with my mom to move out, making sure i was on the lease so he could dip out with no consequences... keep in mind, he has a job! A full time one, one that he could pay for this place 3 times over with.. and i am an artist that works based on commission. That has made basically nothing for months at this point, and am currently developing some super scary mental problems that i cannot and should not deal with alone. I am.. i feel deeply betrayed once more. And i feel like its my fault, like i came into this again knowing what he was and what he was capable of.. and still trusted him. I fucked up. Badly.
But, regardless, i am once more in a pretty shitty spot.. he told me, after getting all of his stuff out and everything, that he is not planning on paying last months rent. Which leaves, me who already doesnt have half of their rent, to get double that, and also, we have to switch over internet and electricty in two days, otherwise it gets straight up cut off. And i wont be able to make any money, get ahold of anyone, or do anything. My way of making money basically orbits being able to get ahold of and talk to people, and also upload things to the internet for people.
Im in a sorry sorry situation. And as much as i hate to ask, i really, really need help.
Im working on the commissions i have now, and now that i am going to be on proper medication soon [silver lining!] Theres a huge chance my work production will increase heavily. The reason its been so bad is that i am lacking a medication that gives me energy, helps me focus, among other things. But that will be fixed very soon!
But right now, what would help, is commissions. Even donantions. Spreading the word, and helping tell people about this and my situation may help a lot honestly. Posting on other sites, subscribing to my Onlyfans [if only for the profit aspect of it] and things of that nature would make the chances of me being able to get through this soar, immensely.
I have until tomorrow to get what i need, and then the 15th for the internet and electicity. Probably adding up to around 700$.
We will see if we can do this! I waited so long to make this post because i was embarassed.. but i know now that i need the help. And people cant help if you dont reach out to them. So im reaching out, desperately, hoping someone will or can take my hand.
Thank you guys so much.
My paypal is jazmin.h.crawford.98[at]gmail.com !
You can send me shinies via fA, donations to my ko - fi, or even just send stuff anonymously. Or, if you cannot help, you can tell someone, or people, who can! And post journals about it. Twitter posts, discord groups, post on facebook.... anything would help right now. And I appreciate each and every one of you immensely.
When i came back, i was overwhelemed with messages, comments, requests, all sorts of things i guess i was just not prepared for at the time. I thought i was mentally ready to handle it all, and ended up having another horrible mental break. I was embarassed to say the least. Embarassed, caught up, and utterly defeated.. once again. And still have tons of stuff that i need to do. It was shitty, and it was unfair of me to claim i was coming back and end up being not atrong enough mentally to handle it. So these past couple of months, ive been taking things slowly, trying to work on commissions as much as possible, i even have atuff completed ive just been.. too scared to upload.
But, i want to. I want to come back, maybe in a smaller way than before, steadily and easily, so that i can prevail.
Some life updates, i had moved out of the horrendous situation i was in, but due to financial difficulty and me basically refusing to ask anyone for help or reach out.. landed me right back at my brothers. And, he pulled the rug right out from under me as soon as that happened. Apparently, he had planned with my mom to move out, making sure i was on the lease so he could dip out with no consequences... keep in mind, he has a job! A full time one, one that he could pay for this place 3 times over with.. and i am an artist that works based on commission. That has made basically nothing for months at this point, and am currently developing some super scary mental problems that i cannot and should not deal with alone. I am.. i feel deeply betrayed once more. And i feel like its my fault, like i came into this again knowing what he was and what he was capable of.. and still trusted him. I fucked up. Badly.
But, regardless, i am once more in a pretty shitty spot.. he told me, after getting all of his stuff out and everything, that he is not planning on paying last months rent. Which leaves, me who already doesnt have half of their rent, to get double that, and also, we have to switch over internet and electricty in two days, otherwise it gets straight up cut off. And i wont be able to make any money, get ahold of anyone, or do anything. My way of making money basically orbits being able to get ahold of and talk to people, and also upload things to the internet for people.
Im in a sorry sorry situation. And as much as i hate to ask, i really, really need help.
Im working on the commissions i have now, and now that i am going to be on proper medication soon [silver lining!] Theres a huge chance my work production will increase heavily. The reason its been so bad is that i am lacking a medication that gives me energy, helps me focus, among other things. But that will be fixed very soon!
But right now, what would help, is commissions. Even donantions. Spreading the word, and helping tell people about this and my situation may help a lot honestly. Posting on other sites, subscribing to my Onlyfans [if only for the profit aspect of it] and things of that nature would make the chances of me being able to get through this soar, immensely.
I have until tomorrow to get what i need, and then the 15th for the internet and electicity. Probably adding up to around 700$.
We will see if we can do this! I waited so long to make this post because i was embarassed.. but i know now that i need the help. And people cant help if you dont reach out to them. So im reaching out, desperately, hoping someone will or can take my hand.
Thank you guys so much.
My paypal is jazmin.h.crawford.98[at]gmail.com !
You can send me shinies via fA, donations to my ko - fi, or even just send stuff anonymously. Or, if you cannot help, you can tell someone, or people, who can! And post journals about it. Twitter posts, discord groups, post on facebook.... anything would help right now. And I appreciate each and every one of you immensely.
Hope you get the money you need... send the link to a few friends who might be able to help I hope.