So I've been pretty quite on here and still haven't sent out those damn emails. honestly, gonna note each person who got a slot and double check if they even want it anymore. It's been a rough couple of months. I've been going through hell trying to figure out where to go. I probably can't afford my current place long-term and have no real back ups as of yet. I had some hope of moving up north to live near some friends in Seattle but that's looking to be a way harder project then I thought. Meanwhile the past month has just been news after news of absolute shit. The anti-LGBT movement gaining for traction, getting more militant and more violent, SCOTUS showing their hands as completely wanting to overturn basically any progressive thing they can, leaving the flood gates open for many states to be become fundamentally unsafe for me and millions of others. They have already stated the next rulings they want overturned including ones that prevent states from outlawing sexual acts outside of marriage(sodomy laws), gay marriage, and others. Everyone going on about how it's guaranteed to get worse as we head to a recession and an election cycle bound to be defined by even more control going to the party that has directly declared me an enemy. On top of that, due to Covid spikes, gas prices, and executive disfunction I basically found myself spending all of it alone. Just stewing in anxiety, uncertainty, pessimism, alcohol, and dread. It's been... a bad time. I'm trying to keep it together and get back into some kinda functioning shape, but it's moving very slow. I'm gonna be spending my July cleaning out my storage by myself because I can't afford it anymore. I have to decide how much of my past I'll be saying goodbye to forever and TBH it's been a whole different flavor of overwhelming. Not because I wanna go back... but because it's all such a deep memory of how much I wished my future would be brighter then at that time... That I no longer had to be afrade of being queer or the abandonment I was but through because of it... and knowing it's still so far from where I hoped... I'll get there... somehow... even if just finding a group and I live around... instead of by myself...

TLDR, I'm gonna try and send out a bunch of notes to those who opted into commission slots and I never got back to, asking if they still want them. It may be slow because I'm still dealing with a lot emotionally.