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Confessions and Plans for the Future...
a year ago
Suppose this is a necessary update regarding the journal I posted here a few months ago.
Firstly I’ve succeeded in getting out of my comfort zone and trying to socialize more. I’ve made a few new acquaintances and have been talking to them regularly. Additionally I’ve been consistently playing D&D with some other players and have enjoyed the story so far.
Secondly within the last two weeks I’ve suffered a major bout of depression and I feel it’s better to talk about it instead of holding it inside. I theorize this bout of depression stems from the fact I recently returned from a vacation visiting my parents, settling back into my normal life, and having a sad realization about how mundane my life is. I’ve lived my whole life without any major plans, ambitions, or knowing what I truly wanted; I’ve been anti-social because I believed I didn’t need many friends; and I’ve lived in my hometown my whole life and rarely left it. I’d describe it as a somber realization that I’ve been wasting the majority of my life and suddenly feeling disillusioned from it as a whole…
While my mind was in a dark place for a couple of days I was able to get through them by talking to some friends online and by being honest with my family. After doing some soul searching and asking myself deep questions I believe I’ve found some answers and want to write them down somewhere as a plan for the near future.
1. In terms of what I want may not even physically exist; it could very well be fictional or spiritual. Only time will tell if I find it.
2a. In terms of being more social I’m going to try to reconnect with some people I used to know locally. 2b. Reach out within the fandom to meet other furs within my area. Hopefully become more active within the fandom again by interacting with others.
3a. Moving away from my hometown will be a longer term goal. But I can at least say I want to move somewhere else.
3b. In terms of traveling I’ve already got a list of day or weekend trips I can take throughout this year. One option on that list might be attending a furry convention somewhere in the Midwest USA. I’ll post another journal once I have more details.
4. In terms of taking care of my mental health I’ve decided talking to a therapist might be a good option. Truth is I’m a very rational person and try to mentally process all my internal baggage on a regular basis, sometimes to the point of overthinking things and causing me to go through this whole process again. But maybe getting a second opinion from a professional will help me break this vicious cycle.
So if you’ve read this far I want to say thanks for listening. I now have a plan for the future and hope it’ll help make me happier. I’ll plan on writing another journal soon with some updates or to reach out for other things.
Thanks for reading this far,
- StormWolff
Firstly I’ve succeeded in getting out of my comfort zone and trying to socialize more. I’ve made a few new acquaintances and have been talking to them regularly. Additionally I’ve been consistently playing D&D with some other players and have enjoyed the story so far.
Secondly within the last two weeks I’ve suffered a major bout of depression and I feel it’s better to talk about it instead of holding it inside. I theorize this bout of depression stems from the fact I recently returned from a vacation visiting my parents, settling back into my normal life, and having a sad realization about how mundane my life is. I’ve lived my whole life without any major plans, ambitions, or knowing what I truly wanted; I’ve been anti-social because I believed I didn’t need many friends; and I’ve lived in my hometown my whole life and rarely left it. I’d describe it as a somber realization that I’ve been wasting the majority of my life and suddenly feeling disillusioned from it as a whole…
While my mind was in a dark place for a couple of days I was able to get through them by talking to some friends online and by being honest with my family. After doing some soul searching and asking myself deep questions I believe I’ve found some answers and want to write them down somewhere as a plan for the near future.
1. In terms of what I want may not even physically exist; it could very well be fictional or spiritual. Only time will tell if I find it.
2a. In terms of being more social I’m going to try to reconnect with some people I used to know locally. 2b. Reach out within the fandom to meet other furs within my area. Hopefully become more active within the fandom again by interacting with others.
3a. Moving away from my hometown will be a longer term goal. But I can at least say I want to move somewhere else.
3b. In terms of traveling I’ve already got a list of day or weekend trips I can take throughout this year. One option on that list might be attending a furry convention somewhere in the Midwest USA. I’ll post another journal once I have more details.
4. In terms of taking care of my mental health I’ve decided talking to a therapist might be a good option. Truth is I’m a very rational person and try to mentally process all my internal baggage on a regular basis, sometimes to the point of overthinking things and causing me to go through this whole process again. But maybe getting a second opinion from a professional will help me break this vicious cycle.
So if you’ve read this far I want to say thanks for listening. I now have a plan for the future and hope it’ll help make me happier. I’ll plan on writing another journal soon with some updates or to reach out for other things.
Thanks for reading this far,
- StormWolff
And never to late to make more friends. IRL friends are hard to find but online you can prolly manage :D
Wish you luck and happiness my friend.