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When it rains, it pours
a year ago
A followup to my last journal here if you missed it; https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10802448
Things have sadly not improved very much.
My father-in-law after going through complications with his health, passed away last month. The very last thing he told me before I had to fly back home was "I'm glad to call you my son". This is going to stick with me for the rest of my life.
Not long after, mom's health continued to deteriorate as she was bedridden for 3 days before taking her to the ER, having learned she's got anemia. She's had to be transferred over to a hospital in Miami as I've had to be home alone since. She may be coming home later today, but how will I know for how long until the next emergency hospital visit?
Granted, the time alone to concentrate on things would normally be beneficial for productivity, but... After losing my dad in October and my father-in-law last month, while mom is in potential danger to be next... Has me in a state of immense stress and panic having this all happen in the course of half a year.
I have to once again apologize profusely to everyone waiting on me to be back in action. It's been extremely difficult as I have no local friends to rely on and chatting with people online can only do so much as my sense of isolation and being trapped with my thoughts especially in a state of immense worry and fear has me essentially paralyzed not knowing what to do at this point.
I don't want to rely on donations as I owe so much as it is already, I just want to experience a sense of normalcy so I can resume with my life. I want to get married, I want to be a father, I want to tell my stories, I want to be financially secure... I don't want to be stuck here.
Things have sadly not improved very much.
My father-in-law after going through complications with his health, passed away last month. The very last thing he told me before I had to fly back home was "I'm glad to call you my son". This is going to stick with me for the rest of my life.
Not long after, mom's health continued to deteriorate as she was bedridden for 3 days before taking her to the ER, having learned she's got anemia. She's had to be transferred over to a hospital in Miami as I've had to be home alone since. She may be coming home later today, but how will I know for how long until the next emergency hospital visit?
Granted, the time alone to concentrate on things would normally be beneficial for productivity, but... After losing my dad in October and my father-in-law last month, while mom is in potential danger to be next... Has me in a state of immense stress and panic having this all happen in the course of half a year.
I have to once again apologize profusely to everyone waiting on me to be back in action. It's been extremely difficult as I have no local friends to rely on and chatting with people online can only do so much as my sense of isolation and being trapped with my thoughts especially in a state of immense worry and fear has me essentially paralyzed not knowing what to do at this point.
I don't want to rely on donations as I owe so much as it is already, I just want to experience a sense of normalcy so I can resume with my life. I want to get married, I want to be a father, I want to tell my stories, I want to be financially secure... I don't want to be stuck here.
If you ever want to reach out, you can feel free to send me a note if you like.
Off topic and probably a tacky thing to say, but, I didn't know you were married! Anyone here, or on bsky? :)
Also, I hope things get better for you, Fox. *hugs*
Take all the time you need for things to eventually get better even if it takes years.
-hugs tightly If you accept It.-
Stay strong. I hope the best for your well-being and your family.