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On Asexuality (and Aegosexuality)
a year ago
I'm writing this because I'm overjoyed by how many of you messaged me saying that you really resonated with the asexual microlabel aegosexual.
There are a LOT of misconceptions about asexuality, especially when it comes to asexual attitudes toward sexual content. To oversimplify it a bit, yes, asexuals can enjoy sexual content.
Using the definitions given by AVEN (The Asexual Visibility & Education Network), an asexual person is "someone who does not experience sexual attraction or an intrinsic desire to have sexual relationships". Sexual attraction is further defined as "desire to have sexual contact with someone else or to share our sexuality with them".
If you masturbate to sexual content but do not feel sexually attracted to people or desire sex with another person in real life, you may still be asexual.
Aegosexuality, which was previously known as autochorissexuality, is a label used to describe those who feel "disconnection between oneself and a sexual target/object of arousal". Basically, you have sexual fantasies, but lack a desire to actually be a participant in the sexual activities.
If you're reading this, you likely enjoy my "kinky toony furry flattening" art. Its so far removed from reality that its no surprise a lot of you really resonate with the term aegosexual, especially if you're one of the people who feel "sexually attracted" to anthros, but not to real people.
Personally, (and this will get personal) I felt confused and alone for a really long time.
Before I discovered and joined the furry fandom (at about 15 years old), I never really thought about by own sexuality. Hell, I hardly knew anything about sex either, because I went to a very conservative single-sex school that didn't even have the most basic sex ed. I assumed I was straight, but I could never really relate to any of the conversations people were having about "hot female celebrities". When I finally joined the furry fandom I learned more about LGBT topics and eventually came across asexuality, which resonated a bit with me, but even then, I felt confused; I found masculine anthros "sexually attractive", but I couldn't translate that sexual attraction to real life men. Still, I thought that once I "lose my virginity", I'd feel different.
When I was 18, I finally did it, and I didn't feel different.
I really was asexual, or at least, gray asexual, but I couldn't find the right word to describe my exact feelings until... just a few weeks ago.
I guess my whole point with this is that you are never alone in your feelings, no matter how weird they are, and that micro-labels are actually really helpful in finding the words to those feelings, even if the vast majority of people may never learn or memorize that specific term. I don't think I'll ever tell anyone outside of kink-friendly spaces that I am aego (not everyone needs to know about my porn preferences), but its the term that works for me.
I hope you all have a great pride month!
There are a LOT of misconceptions about asexuality, especially when it comes to asexual attitudes toward sexual content. To oversimplify it a bit, yes, asexuals can enjoy sexual content.
Using the definitions given by AVEN (The Asexual Visibility & Education Network), an asexual person is "someone who does not experience sexual attraction or an intrinsic desire to have sexual relationships". Sexual attraction is further defined as "desire to have sexual contact with someone else or to share our sexuality with them".
If you masturbate to sexual content but do not feel sexually attracted to people or desire sex with another person in real life, you may still be asexual.
Aegosexuality, which was previously known as autochorissexuality, is a label used to describe those who feel "disconnection between oneself and a sexual target/object of arousal". Basically, you have sexual fantasies, but lack a desire to actually be a participant in the sexual activities.
If you're reading this, you likely enjoy my "kinky toony furry flattening" art. Its so far removed from reality that its no surprise a lot of you really resonate with the term aegosexual, especially if you're one of the people who feel "sexually attracted" to anthros, but not to real people.
Personally, (and this will get personal) I felt confused and alone for a really long time.
Before I discovered and joined the furry fandom (at about 15 years old), I never really thought about by own sexuality. Hell, I hardly knew anything about sex either, because I went to a very conservative single-sex school that didn't even have the most basic sex ed. I assumed I was straight, but I could never really relate to any of the conversations people were having about "hot female celebrities". When I finally joined the furry fandom I learned more about LGBT topics and eventually came across asexuality, which resonated a bit with me, but even then, I felt confused; I found masculine anthros "sexually attractive", but I couldn't translate that sexual attraction to real life men. Still, I thought that once I "lose my virginity", I'd feel different.
When I was 18, I finally did it, and I didn't feel different.
I really was asexual, or at least, gray asexual, but I couldn't find the right word to describe my exact feelings until... just a few weeks ago.
I guess my whole point with this is that you are never alone in your feelings, no matter how weird they are, and that micro-labels are actually really helpful in finding the words to those feelings, even if the vast majority of people may never learn or memorize that specific term. I don't think I'll ever tell anyone outside of kink-friendly spaces that I am aego (not everyone needs to know about my porn preferences), but its the term that works for me.
I hope you all have a great pride month!
🩶🩶🤍🤍🤍🩶🩶
🤍🤍🩶🩶🩶🤍🤍
💜💜💜🖤💜💜💜
I always figured asexual was a lack of sexual attraction to either sex. Men or women rather than 'sex' per se. Plenty in the furry community like things aside from the two human genders so it just made sense to me.
Aegosexuality reminds me a little of those people who don't have an inner monologue, who can't hear voices in their head. It's not a lakc of imagination (which is something else) but there's a disconnect there.
I have had the fortune of my sexuality not clashing strongly with anyone. I got to drift hither and thither and enjoy what I wished without people sticking their nose in my business It is unfortunate that not everyone gets things so easy. But that's what journals like this one can help with.
aego gang
It's such amazing feeling to finally be able to go, "That's it! That's what I am!"
Thank for sharing your experience (and your delightfully kinky art~) with us!
at this point Ive pretty much given up on trying to form relationships or have sexual relations anymore since I now understand that it just isnt for me. and I much happier for it. real life people just dont do it for me like furries (or certain other fictional characters) do, and Im way more into things like flattening, inflation, and humiliation than sex lol.
Despite my personal, sexual experiences across my life, it took quite some time myself to come to grips with the nature of my own asexuality. It's been a terribly difficult disposition to catch up with, let alone explore.
I'm happy for you. Happy pride month.
The reason I mention this isn't to be egotistical and talk about myself(at least, not entirely), but to say it's really nice to hear you have found a way to describe your sexuality in a way that fits you. I'm not sure if or when I will find out *exactly* what i am (though in truth labels don't matter too much), but it does mean a lot to hear your experiences. Thank you for sharing, and happy pride!