"Be Yourself"
a year ago
General
Oooh! What's new today? "Be Yourself", says the Furry Fandom. And yet, as with many things in life, it's far easier said than done.
I've found that 'being myself' can take a lot of bravery, but I want to tell you why it's so, so important.
Storytime!
At Eurofurence this year, I ran the e621 Gameshow for the third year in a row. And for the third year in a row, we were over capacity. As in, security-comes-in-to-tell-people-to-leave levels of over capacity (Which, my dear sympathies once again with those who had to go!)
We had a crowd that was there for an hour and a half of weird furry porn. Who cheered for horsecock. Who delighted in Falco Lombardi macro art. A hundred people - a quarter of the room - gleefully admitted to being into vore. The atmosphere was electric, and I hadn't even needed my e-stim kit. This was a crowd who rejoiced in the adult side of the fandom!
And then I asked them - how many people had a fetish they'd be nervous admitting to?
A third of the room raised their hands.
In a room that had been laughing moments earlier about the amount of Mufasa/Simba porn, or getting a 100% success rate on guessing popular cock shapes, 1/3 of them weren't confident in revealing those same parts of themselves.
I don't think this is rare.
I've had folks ask me if I get hate for the kind of art I draw (not really much at all, by the way). But worse, I get people telling me - they wish they could draw what they want, write the characters they love… but they fear what others might say.
I've had commissioners remain anonymous, for fear of people knowing what they're into. Known artists start up alt accounts, so that they can draw a kink without their friends knowing. Writers wringing their hands over possible reactions to their stories.
And I would love to tell you it's all just fear - but truth is, it isn't.
Because it ain't just the big patron sites that are swinging the axe on the 'too weird'. Our own sites - our communities - sharpen their restrictions. Whole kinks, loving and accepted, are now 'too far'. (I say, pointedly, on this site.)
We're fearing the gaze from the outside. We're hearing their derision. And that can scare us, cause us to hide not just ourselves, but those around us. "What if they think that I'm into that? What would they say? I need to prove I'm not!"
We all crave love and acceptance. And in a fandom formed in rejection from society, don't we just hold such ideals even more tightly? So much so that the very idea of this same community throwing us out - for being ourselves? Of course it's terrifying.
But it turns out, even us outcasts, outsiders… we can all hold prejudices. We all have the ability to draw lines, and give too little thought to what that means. We can so easily turn our own opinions, our fear of what others think of us, into rules that hurt and exclude.
And therein lies the issue. "Be yourself", says the fandom, without stopping to consider how treacherous, how thorned that path can be. To be yourself, sometimes, is to suffer the disgust of those who would tell you to do it in the first place.
But… I'm missing something.
Thing is, this fandom isn't based on any one thing. We're not just here because Zootopia was a kinda cool movie, or Twokinds is pretty sexy, or StarFox looks good when he's fifteen stories tall.
We follow no one IP, no webcomic, no TV show. We follow only one thing:
Ourselves.
We make the fandom we live in. We're dozens of sexualities, a hundred meetups and conventions, a thousand discord servers and Telegram channels, a million pictures and stories and alt-accounts and roleplays…
We decide what we are.
Aren't we the haven of the weird? The questioning of sexualities? The taboo, even incomprehensible kinks? We joke about vore, knots, gratuitous foot fetishists, but isn't that what makes this place home? Isn't every artist drawing obvious kink art following a beautiful legacy?
We are the monsterfuckers. The maw-obsessed, the paw-sluts, the musk-lovers (er, not that one). With every fetish we draw, every kink we commission, every smut-filled story and problematic character and taboo-laden roleplay…
We're the fandom, making ourselves.
Through being myself, through art and stories and chats and servers, I've found new communities. New friends. New ways to think, new art to enjoy. I've found love, deeper than I ever thought possible.
I've found myself.
And I've been told that through my artwork, stories, friend groups, I've helped people do the same. They've found the words to describe what's been inside them this whole time.
They've found they're not alone.
It's one of the sweetest and most delightful things I've heard.
Yes, it takes bravery to be yourself. You risk being misperceived, either accidentally or wilfully. You risk hurt. You risk confusion. But it's nothing you haven't done before. And in its wake, you will find yourself.
Do not let other people dictate who you are.
Do not let other people dictate who you are.
So when I say to keep furry weird, this is what I mean. Find that part of yourself that yearns to be free, and make this fandom the place for it.
Be yourself. Be so amazingly yourself that your very existence is an act of rebellion.
And Keep. Furry. Weird.
I've found that 'being myself' can take a lot of bravery, but I want to tell you why it's so, so important.
Storytime!
At Eurofurence this year, I ran the e621 Gameshow for the third year in a row. And for the third year in a row, we were over capacity. As in, security-comes-in-to-tell-people-to-leave levels of over capacity (Which, my dear sympathies once again with those who had to go!)
We had a crowd that was there for an hour and a half of weird furry porn. Who cheered for horsecock. Who delighted in Falco Lombardi macro art. A hundred people - a quarter of the room - gleefully admitted to being into vore. The atmosphere was electric, and I hadn't even needed my e-stim kit. This was a crowd who rejoiced in the adult side of the fandom!
And then I asked them - how many people had a fetish they'd be nervous admitting to?
A third of the room raised their hands.
In a room that had been laughing moments earlier about the amount of Mufasa/Simba porn, or getting a 100% success rate on guessing popular cock shapes, 1/3 of them weren't confident in revealing those same parts of themselves.
I don't think this is rare.
I've had folks ask me if I get hate for the kind of art I draw (not really much at all, by the way). But worse, I get people telling me - they wish they could draw what they want, write the characters they love… but they fear what others might say.
I've had commissioners remain anonymous, for fear of people knowing what they're into. Known artists start up alt accounts, so that they can draw a kink without their friends knowing. Writers wringing their hands over possible reactions to their stories.
And I would love to tell you it's all just fear - but truth is, it isn't.
Because it ain't just the big patron sites that are swinging the axe on the 'too weird'. Our own sites - our communities - sharpen their restrictions. Whole kinks, loving and accepted, are now 'too far'. (I say, pointedly, on this site.)
We're fearing the gaze from the outside. We're hearing their derision. And that can scare us, cause us to hide not just ourselves, but those around us. "What if they think that I'm into that? What would they say? I need to prove I'm not!"
We all crave love and acceptance. And in a fandom formed in rejection from society, don't we just hold such ideals even more tightly? So much so that the very idea of this same community throwing us out - for being ourselves? Of course it's terrifying.
But it turns out, even us outcasts, outsiders… we can all hold prejudices. We all have the ability to draw lines, and give too little thought to what that means. We can so easily turn our own opinions, our fear of what others think of us, into rules that hurt and exclude.
And therein lies the issue. "Be yourself", says the fandom, without stopping to consider how treacherous, how thorned that path can be. To be yourself, sometimes, is to suffer the disgust of those who would tell you to do it in the first place.
But… I'm missing something.
Thing is, this fandom isn't based on any one thing. We're not just here because Zootopia was a kinda cool movie, or Twokinds is pretty sexy, or StarFox looks good when he's fifteen stories tall.
We follow no one IP, no webcomic, no TV show. We follow only one thing:
Ourselves.
We make the fandom we live in. We're dozens of sexualities, a hundred meetups and conventions, a thousand discord servers and Telegram channels, a million pictures and stories and alt-accounts and roleplays…
We decide what we are.
Aren't we the haven of the weird? The questioning of sexualities? The taboo, even incomprehensible kinks? We joke about vore, knots, gratuitous foot fetishists, but isn't that what makes this place home? Isn't every artist drawing obvious kink art following a beautiful legacy?
We are the monsterfuckers. The maw-obsessed, the paw-sluts, the musk-lovers (er, not that one). With every fetish we draw, every kink we commission, every smut-filled story and problematic character and taboo-laden roleplay…
We're the fandom, making ourselves.
Through being myself, through art and stories and chats and servers, I've found new communities. New friends. New ways to think, new art to enjoy. I've found love, deeper than I ever thought possible.
I've found myself.
And I've been told that through my artwork, stories, friend groups, I've helped people do the same. They've found the words to describe what's been inside them this whole time.
They've found they're not alone.
It's one of the sweetest and most delightful things I've heard.
Yes, it takes bravery to be yourself. You risk being misperceived, either accidentally or wilfully. You risk hurt. You risk confusion. But it's nothing you haven't done before. And in its wake, you will find yourself.
Do not let other people dictate who you are.
Do not let other people dictate who you are.
So when I say to keep furry weird, this is what I mean. Find that part of yourself that yearns to be free, and make this fandom the place for it.
Be yourself. Be so amazingly yourself that your very existence is an act of rebellion.
And Keep. Furry. Weird.
FA+

The internet has become filled with moral busy bodies who are willing to ruin anybody's reputation for 5 minutes of clout
This to say, I think it's absolutely possible for the fandom to improve, even if we've backslid a lil'. We'll get better, I know we will <3
Despite all of this, I think what's always won is our mutual love for this subject no matter how crude or explicit parts of the fandom happen to be.
Humans have shunned things from the very beginnings and I think it's laughable to argue that furries are excluded from this behavior.
It's always been this way. The only difference now is that everyone has a means of voicing their opinion and the witch hunts are more interesting than the love we show one another.
Being myself means that, the people I call my friend, I can continue to call my friend whilst openly being who and what I am.
I also think it's fine to not like things, or dislike things others are into, but that's so very different to disliking someone because of what they're into, a person's tastes and personality are not the same, so once again, agreed, peeps gotta be themselves and be proud of that c:
I've been in this fandom for almost 25 years. I've seen it in a time where fictional kinks were accepted by just about everyone, where the only judge were outsiders, and if you were in your own server room, no one cared, you'd get banned for giving people shit. But now that the social side of the fandom is relegated to social media or sites like this... It gets controlled and maintained en masse by people we don't even trust... If you go to twitter, draw feral, people will oust you and some even try to doxx you. FA's going through a turbulent time for the ABDL and hypnosis, even some feral artists, right now. Another purge is happening allegedly...
I decided in order to be myself... I am avoiding the community. I've been insulted and attacked over my stories and characters because they depict horrible acts or the characters are literal villains, written to be evil, or the characters have a traumatic backstory that 'no one wants to hear about'. I've heard of some rumors spreading lies about me because of what some of my stuff has. I tried to fit in with people, and I tried to be myself. It's not working anymore.
I'm asexual in real life. I wear so many kinky masks online, but I would never do anything in the real world... But no one seems to want to believe that. It's fun to be weird and kinky, even my therapist says it's a good coping mechanism for me since I have... a lot of trauma...
Being myself was never enough... But I do hope others can find themselves... With little to no external influence telling them that their literal fantasies are awful... Because they aren't. They're fantasy. There's horrid people doing stuff in the real world, but the puritans believe they can pick on people who are anxious about their fantasy kinks because they already are doubtful of themselves... It's cruel.
*sigh* Sorry for the long post. I'm happy to see people like you, DV. I hope you can help many more in the future, you silly bean.
...It sounds a lil' cynical, but I don't think it need be seen that way. I think we're all a little scared of others, of rejection by friends and peers. So we build these walls to protect ourselves, and a side effect we rarely intend is to push away those that need our community.
I keep this in mind a lot, whenever I find someone new, someone hurting, someone different. Whenever there's a big event that I feel the need to form that opinion. I find that I don't... need to, a lot of the time. I find my view can be nuanced. And I find that, ultimately, many people just wanna be themselves, and even in kinks and ideas others want us to hate, there's love and care and kindness.
I believe the needle can move in the fandom. And I'm glad you're here, bein' you. I hope you can be even more of yourself in your own little circles, hun. You deserve it <3
Something I find rather fascinating is how much the furry fandom functions is an increasingly global clique. There's a broad level of connection there between creative minds that, to my mind, counts for something quite significant. There's a genuine chance that moving the needle in the fandom can help to move the needle around the world.
I think perhaps the most optimistic and charitable way to contemplate the hateful is that, if these sorts of things we are are so interested in are in part a product of our own pains and sufferings, then on some level what these people are revolted by deep down is not merely the outputs derived from those sufferings, but perhaps the suffering in and of itself.
Again, perhaps that is optimistic. Maybe it is as simple as surface level disgust mixing with fear, but I think even the hateful must be given some benefit of the doubt for them to ever become anything more than cruel.
It's true - be proud of your kind of weird, yes... but equally importantly, be proud of anyone who has the courage to be their kind of weird as well.
And if someone calls you weird... make like a hyena and laugh~
I’m still here, but I’m on the verge of giving up, to be honest. I hope your words can re-inspire me to keep going.
I hope you do keep going. Your art has been delightful to see, and it's inspired and pushed me to do more more ferals for years now. I've heard nothing but wonderful, accepting things about you.
I hope we get to meet up at some point and share the love ^w^
"In this world you've got to be strong. You've got to fight to keep your spirit alive."
I was one of the people who raised their hands for both vore and being afraid of telling my seat neighbor about certain kinks of mine.
The whole speech resonated with me on an absolutely fundamental level and has definitely helped catalyze large scale changes in my behavior.
To say this years EF was a canon event for me is an understatement.
There are no words to express my gratitude for this rather surprising impromptu speech in the place where I least expected it.
So I will keep it simple. Thank you.
Hell yes. I'm so glad for you, hun <3
Going the EF this year has potentially been one of the best decisions of my life.
Meeting all these likeminded people, immersing myself fully in the community in the real world for the first time has allowed me to properly accept this facet of me.
Even if I didn't talk to many people or make new friends, just having been there, having these memories, is something I will cherish for a long time to come.
And I definitely will be back, this is hopefully the beginning of something great.
But alas, I'm starting to yap.
To make a long story short, I deeply appreciate people like you that are willing to put themselves out there and to try and inspire others to do the same. It definitely worked for me.
And that I adore the way you have with words. Both in this speech and your works of fiction.
But I've lost so much of my sanity already trying to fit in society when I was younger. And now I've become a suicidal girl who doesn't fear death or anything, I just don't care anymore, I draw and receive art of my favorite subjects to keep me happy. It's what makes me happy, I tried not using the internet again and it only lasted 1 month. I NEED my daily dose of weirdness and hornyness.
Sorry, just had to get this out of my chest.
Keep it going, hun <3
Everytime I see a new art from you, it makes my day better. Because you're my favorite artist and biggest inspiration :>
Keep furry weird <3
Yes, the internet is a double-edged sword. Parts of it are depressing, but I wouldn't have half the ideas to create things, if I didn't see something else that inspired it.
As for the suicidal thoughts, I promised my mom that I will only off myself when she dies. Because she's the only person who cares for me.
Again, it was a refreshing thing to hear
NC
drugs
Vore
Gore
Snuff
And similar
Meanwhile staff did nothing about this, felt like bring made an outcast
Tldr, fiction is just that, fiction, nothing real, no one actually getting harmed, so why would/should people care?
Let people enjoy things, long is but fiction, should it matter what one enjoys?
But in the end, love DV art, all the plaisir stuff, everything, just an awesome yeen making awesome content
Damn i suck at this, but, yea, talking/socializing is hard, but bet is a blast to hang out with
And true, that doesn't negate the harm, or the hurt. But it's still so important to remember. You'll always have a tribe <3
But yk, the 13 year olds love that stuff so of course it's more accepted than my stuff.
I tried branching out once or twice only to be burned, and never looked back. It takes a lot f guts and persistence. I just don't have it.
You're an incredibly sweet and talented person, Violet
And thank you, that's very kind of you to say <3
Buh. Sorry. Venting. I just wish I could find your kind of confidence to just say "fuck the haters" because I think some part of me is afraid of the rude awakening that that would be half the people I know, if I ever spoke of this around them.
Terms change as society moves, and I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing - we do shed the baggage and the prejudices of our parents, even as we unknowingly carry some on or pick up our own. I wish the confusion didn't always hurt like it can, and some could be more understanding of honest mistakes.
I don't know if you're actively soliciting advice or just needing the vent, but I've found that pushing ahead with your best guess, whilst expressing an earnest will to listen and - if need be - change your behaviour can be freeing. Sure, it can be awkward, and sure, it might not always work. But expressing where you're at, and a care and love for yourself and others... that can go a long way.
I hope you can be yourself, and enjoy your character <3
If we're supposed to be accepting of trans rights now, they should be accepting of you, and your right to express yourself. That's what this is all about. There's more than one way to be transgender, there's more than one way to express it. Yours is as valid as anyone's.
Some of the stories were incredible.
Sometimes our biggest worries connect to the important parts of ourselves <3
Let's stay wild and weird! >:p <3
And hell yeah. Someone's always gonna hate ya for no reason. Might as well be yourself while it happens - and hey, turns out, often you'll make others happy just by doing that <3
Keep Furry Weird!!!!
I admit my art is majority NSFW, but frankly, that's what I've always liked to draw as hobby and only recently struggling to make it part of my freelance art career.
Great post, always love to see your weirdness~<3
Also, total non sequitur, but I love your stuff.
Anyway, thanks for letting me know, I appreciate it :>
:3
I find that for every person who's gonna send you hate, there're more that are there to share that love - and a fucktonne others who honestly don't really care, because they know the real you ^w^
We've come a long way, and as a fandom grows larger more problems pop up and take more effort to defuse, but it's nice to find so many little pockets in the fandom I can vibe with instead of needing to be in super giant social groups that need constant moderation. I'd like to think you're a good reason many people are open the way they are, given how much your art has circulated in the small groups I inhabit, and that's pretty cool.
Also, big agree on the little pockets. I adore the small twenty-person servers of close-knit, familiar vibes <3
As much as we want to be accepting of all or we say everyone should be, the problem is it's so easy to judge and/or hate simply because it's so ingrained in being human, and it's easier to cast someone off as weird or wrong than to try to understand someone else's views on something.
I suppose I'm not putting forward the idea to be your true self everywhere - I can think of a half-dozen examples where that isn't a good idea straight away. More, every time you advance a little bit of yourself, you let yourself be more free, you influence minds, and you find folks you can confide in. Even if the only place you can be yourself is to a single friend, that's still a wonderful feeling and so powerful <3
I feel sick being on twitter etc. sometimes, I see these wicked agitators spewing hate against people for nonsense reasons, had to start muting and blocking liberally to feel some semblance of calmness. On FA I've had a really good experience overall tho
I've heard the phrase Keep Furry Weird a while back and I fully agree with it, there's many kinks I can't stand, many things I don't like but they must be allowed space if I myself want to have a space, simple golden rule.
I hate being uncertain though, not sure if and when the goalpost will be moved further on FA. Who will be next to get a smack of the taboo stick\\
Anyway, keep being you!
Such a raw line <3
Being genuine found me the best friends I've ever had and I love interacting with them, feel understood more than ever.
Absolutely. I'm so glad you've had that experience too. I think that's part of the main thrust of my point here - the closest connections I have with others came after we opened up about these parts of ourselves. I can't imagine life without those folks and that ability to be myself with them <3
Let's hope FA's admins learns these lessons too. I have hope ^w^
Keep being you too!
Sometimes... I don't feel that furry pride no more with how often furries bash other furries. Guess it is true that no body hates furries more than furries.
Though I still believe in the good of the Fandom. I've met some really awesome fluffs who make my days brighter and I hope to meet more some time
There are always good times and folks in this fandom <3
Anyways, your amazing and your art is pure gold. I love the stories you add which make it all the better. I wish others did the same, but most I see now is just advertising.
Don't change, Dark.
This...isn't going to change for me I'm afraid, but your words are still touching. You just let me know that it's OK for me to be me. Nobody else in the comments probably even knows who I am and you probably don't either, and this comment's going to get buried, but still, thank you. ^^'
I don't know what experiences you've had, or what cons are like around ya. I will say though that, in real life, I've never felt rejected for just liking ferals. I'm very open about it at cons, at furmeets, in my real-life furry friendships, and never had anything other than passive acceptance through to outright love and support <3
I hope you can have that too. It's absolutely okay to be you, and I'm glad you're feeling that <3
Either way, to try and restrain myself from going down that path, especially since others have already discussed it thoroughly, absolutely yes everything to what you said.
I hope the community shatterings stop sooner rather than later. I'm old and tired. Please stop hitting us with a hammer.
Hugs <3
My time running AGNPH both taught me a lot of lessons and also massively jaded me. And behind the scenes, things really aren't black and white. And there's always a lot of discussions over what is and isn't allowed. I won't get much more than that into that line of discussion, it's an open secret this happens with most community management anywhere.
If our communities keep being targeted by those within, we'll find new places to settle. The old ones will eventually realise that they're missing fundamental cores of what made their community, and we'll see if they care about that or not. We will persist, and thrive, in spite of them.
I really do appreciate the hugs. This sort of thing rests on my mind so god damned much.
Back in 2017, I was at a local community college that had established a "furry club." The group was an okay bunch, but apparently the "leader" of the group practically hated smut of any kind, and she especially hated pregnancy. She had convinced me that sexualizing pregnancy in any form (whether that was feral, anthro, or human, sfw or nsfw) was immoral by constantly degrading me for it. Needless to say, it sunk in.
Later on I had expressed an opinion to one member who I thought was close to me that, "I kinda would like to see her character pregnant." Not having any intentions of making that move or trying to commission her character without the artist knowing somehow, just one of those weird feelings that comes on. Turns out they told her, and the group voted to kick me out because they were "uncomfortable" with my presence, saying that I liked pregnancy in order to actually get the girl members pregnant for real, and one guy straight up calling me a sexual predator with NO MERIT.
The guy I managed to land as my bf turned my opinion of pregnancy as a kink around, since he was also into it. I also learned it's a super common thing that guys (and girls sometimes) have. Because of him, he does get all the credit, I'm not very nervous to admit that I enjoy pregnancy a lot, and about 90% of the artwork I've paid him for is related to the subject. However, even though he did all that for me mentally, I still have issues asking for pregnancy in commission work, especially so if the artist is not him, usually having to rip off the bandaid to get myself to say it. I don't think that'll ever go away.
We've definitely gotten less tolerant. Or maybe it depends on who you're around. I was unlucky enough to have been around those bad apples.
Stay weird.
I'm so glad you could find a place where you could celebrate and enjoy that kink, and hope you can keep opening up about it. Pregnancy is so fuckin' fun to play around with <333
Stay weird~
I see reminders of this sort of thing every single day.
- Someone commenting on art with a preface of "I'm not into this kink, but..." in case someone were to *gasp* think they like it.
- The people who deliberately seek out content they don't like in order to shame it and the people who make and enjoy it.
- The friendgroups on Discord channels or Telegram channels that have enough loud voices in them mocking a kink so that others in the chat are afraid to say anything positive about it.
- And, of the course, the nutjobs who tie their disdain of X or Y kink to some moral crusade so they can feel justified in publicly decrying it, equating fictional characters and lines on a page to our literal reality.
I still hope one day to enjoy a fandom where everyone respects what everyone else enjoys and doesn't judge them for having different tastes than them.
But I'm not holding my breath.
We're on this road, I genuinely believe. The rejection of cringe culture and the more vocal minorities crying out their delights. There are absolutely sects that do that but then draw a harsh line, ignorant of what they're causing, but I still think that's progress in some ways. Just have to expand the space we have <3
And each person has their own ethics, their own morals. In their own minds they are as broad as possible, accepting all that is good but not tolerating anything that is bad. Everyone has their limits, vore, cub, nazi furs... There is always something to make a person go 'But that's different!' Some of those views are constrainingly narrow and puritan, others digustingly decadent... to us. And there is no higher authority who will come down from above to say 'Yes, THIS is the one true furry'. We each must decide for ourselves and try our best to convince others of our rightness.
So furry has always accepted the weird, but also cringed too.
And being yourself hurts. Not only does it lay bear your essence and weaknesses for the judgement and abuse of others, but in this world as it is now, where senators call for the end of furry, where Russia bans art as LGBTQ propoganda, where people may be harassed attacked or fired for liking Bugs Bunny in drag, let alone horsecock... being yourself is dangerous. People fight for who they are, but they die and suffer too. And it is often cold comfort to know your suffering is for a noble cause. I have had more than one fur in a comfortable country like mine opine that those in oppressive regimes should stand up, even to death, because their sacrifice will inspire people to rise against injustice. Which is easy to say when there are no consequences for you. And even in lesser things, it may be wrong for family, friends and collegues to scorn and judge and accuse... but they are still part of your life and the choice to be yourself or lose such people is seldom and easy one either way. Alas we do not live in a world where the right choice is always the most beneficial.
It's all a big, complicated mess with no solution to be found in simple black-and-white ideals, slogans or philosophies. And that is why life is hard.
But I think everyone needs one place where they can do that, one friend or group where they can take of the various masks we wear. And in the places they can't, there is power in pushing the envelope. I'm not gonna tell people at work what I draw, but I can talk about LGBT topics in an accepting way. I'm not gonna open up about every kink to everyone I know, but I can give my delighted opinion when the topics come up. All these little things can build up in delightful ways, and I do hope that everyone gets a chance to feel the benefits, even in some small way <3
Does not matter if they are anthro-minded, can talk and give consent - as long as it looks like it it will be banned. Just like the last ban, it was just the next step towards it. And it's for sure not going to get better.
I've always liked FA, despite its many flaws. And I believe in its ability to be accepting. I think we can genuinely push for that, and while change like this will always take a while, I think it's worth it to try and will ultimately succeed <3
Would have loved to see that moment on EF, was not able to go. And I agree to a lot said, in comments and in your journal.
You have no idea how much I didn't draw out of unreasonable fear to make half of the fandom dislike you even though there would be no reason to.
And I hope you can go to EF in the future too~!
Keep up the good work in doing your part!
Thank you! I have no plans on slowing down <3
In a community filled with money makers, money takers, and popufurs. If you lack the creativity, cash, and social gravitas ... often enough you are ignored and treated as non-existant. Is why on a whole I no longer deal with the fandom. Three trips to cons, and numerous years on multiple sites hasn't changed anything.
I admire those who can be a part of it all, and I wish them all as much happiness as they can achieve.
One would hope that any and all in the future can find a home amongst the many. But as long as we all focus on what divides us rather than what unites us, our community is doomed to failure.
Best wishes always.
~ aG.
I've seen so many artists purge or close down their accounts, especially feral artists, over the last few years because of witch hunting and such. It's always sad to see another favorite go ...
Been pretty fortunate not to get a lot of attacks for my feral gallery, though I've had a few over the use of a hermaphrodite character. Heard too many horror stories about people going through galleries and favorites to use as an attack against an individual.
Definitely miss the old fandom that always seemed far more tolerant and accepting of everyone's weirdness, even if they didn't agree with it. Society has become far to fixated on demonizing people for not following the 'accepted' thought path that a few folks has decided is the only way appropriate to think and do.
I'll be keeping my fingers crossed that we pull through the other side of it all, intact, as a fandom. It was the tolerance, openness, and acceptance that drew me into the fandom 15+ years ago and while there is more support for LGBTQ+ now than ever, the tolerance for niche kinks, ideas and such has all but died out. That's what I want to get back to.
Yet, despite all possible worst case scenarios that I keep hearing about, I decided to get back into drawing & do both anthro & feral during a volatile period. Why? Honestly, I have no clue.
I joined back in '11 back when the MLP craze was just taking off, artists like Braeburned & Dimwitdog were just starting out. Yet, I never really tried drawing, much less interact with the fandom much during then minus a few people cause:
- my art wasn't good by comparison when I first discovered the internet, despite drawing since 5
- my social skills were worse when I wasn't being incredibly shy (like being "weird" in a bad way)
- I was given terrible life advice on "growing up" since drawing full-time was for "deadbeat losers" who were never gonna be successful & that the key to happiness was success
(A.K.A. Job with tons of money, like IT Tech levels)
Yet, for some reason, I promised myself I'd start over and get back into drawing maybe 4 years ago after looking at so many works through the years and actually stick to it this time. It was a hell of a slow start cause It had been a long time since I even did so it was kind of like trying to restart a decade-old engine & keep it running and for a while I was proud of it... Then got extremely discouraged earlier this year cause not only realized through a art style timeline meme I didn't really make as much progress as I originally thought by comparison, but that life advice finally blew up in my face & was finally about to go to my first con after multiple failed attempts, just to cancel yet again at the last minute & experience the worst weekend of my life while said con was going on as a reward. So at this point, my self esteem is deeper than rock bottom: Threw away a decade I could've used to practice drawing to chase a dead end for the promise of riches & happiness, social media seemed to be reinforcing the belief my work overall sucks by comparison to others in the same time frame, who could do it better and faster, and interacting with others still ended badly even when I did work up the nerve, so I actually considered leaving it all behind due to feeling like a failure in every aspect possible...
And yet, something in my gut kept telling me to keep going, despite feeling like crap. On one hand, I still feel like the idea of being well known in the fandom after 10-20+ years, being able to finally go to cons, especially in different countries like EF, or give inspirational speeches to someone who's been in my shoes at one point at events feels more like a dream you eventually let go when you're older, like being an astronaut & I've made peace with that possibility. On the other hand... Idk, maybe a part of me wants to see what I could've made if I had started sooner, so instead I decided to redouble my efforts and relearn everything in recent months, starting with maintaining & improving discipline. Even decided to try learning animation despite telling myself my work isn't good, cause: "I'm not getting any younger, so I'm not waiting til my art gets good" so I decided to practice that. I'd say I'm taking the "be yourself" advice, but probably in a more, "Yeah, screw it. This ain't gonna get any attention anyway, so might as well show it anyway for progress sake" view. Honestly, I don't know what's gonna happen or what I'm doing in another... 12 years, but might as well keep doing something that's always kept my interest since childhood.
Still, surprised you've been in the fandom for 25+ years. I figured at least 10+ from your works but damn, that impressive. Am curious, what was it like for you when you first started? When you have absolutely no clue how far you were even going to be in the fandom & wasn't old enough start giving zero F's often?
Sorry for the ramble, It's just something that got me thinking inwards about if I started being more myself slowly & unknowingly before this speech out of gaining more self-esteem or age helping out.
Congrats on 25+ years in the fandom and everything you accomplished then. You deserve it
The point of art in the fandom, for me, has always been for yourself first and foremost. To express the fetishes and sexualities and desires and loves that are within you. As long as you're doing that, I think you're doin' it right :3
I'm a lil' surprised to hear you're not attracting much attention hun. Your art is certainly good enough <3 I suppose this is just those whims of fate things, where the right random sequence hasn't happened to connect you to the folks that would love to see it. I guess what I'm saying is, I think it's probably just a matter of a lil' more time, and continuing to draw what inspires you <3
As for me, I've only been in the fandom for about 15 years rather than 25. When I first started... I'm not sure I have a full idea! The whole thing seemed so drenched in mystique and complexity, and in many ways it still is. There was certainly some more openness about certain sexualities and fetishes, I know, but also sometimes the exact same arguments (less nuanced, too) and a whole lotta immaturity too. Oh, and a bunch of scene kids and edgy art. Man, that stuff rocked.
That's rather surprising to hear, but thanks. Honestly I figured that was the case or maybe some other factors: Like I'm too much of a "generalist" to pin down what I could be known for, compared to artists who specialize in one thing (Gay-only, feral only, Pokemon/Digimon only, TF, Milf, a particular character, etc...), I am too much of a hermit/ lurker to interact with other artists in the fandom out of fear of putting my foot in my mouth, or maybe my work is just too generic and there's nothing special about my art style to make it stand out in comparison right now.
But it is what it is. I've made peace that my work will probably won't get that much attention, and a blowup will never happen. The only thing I'm going to do now is keep my expectations low, try to participate in collaborations / Art Packs as often as possible, and just appreciate the following I have gotten while improving my works as often as I can.
Are you enjoying the process too? How much joy is being an artist bringing you right now?
I was already long aware of this problem (about months back before my first post here) and already been working to not be so hard on myself and remind myself to focus back to the process itself and creating just for the sake of it, without worrying about how it might be received. I’m not fully there yet, as... ugh, don't know how to explain this to someone who ( As far as I know ) haven't walked a mile in my shoes... It's feels like a tug of war, but you're trying to keep it in the center: One side you still want to have fun just goofing around and enjoying yourself, but at the same time, you want to keep improving your craft and not slack off cause you want to see how far you can go for your sake
Right now, I’d say the joy in the process comes in waves. Some days, I enjoy it and I’m reminded why I love being an artist. (Heck, made a silly personal rough doodle for a friend just out of mischief) Other days, I just feel the weight of not good enough and self-criticism creeps in, so at point I know I need to call it quits for the day and try again tomorrow or the day after. But I’m making progress in it, and kind of hope I can help someone get through their rough patch someday with a speech like this
I hope that you can make it to a big con sometime and meet up with folks that enjoy your art specifically. I know they're out there, and I'm sure you do too, even if it never seems enough. I know you're gonna have a blast <3
And in the meantime - I hope you keep gettin' more of those waves of joy. You deserve 'em ^w^
Unfortunately, I don't see it in the cards for me that I'm ever gonna go to a con in general or anyone recognizing my stuff. As I've said, it just feels more like a dream you let go as you get older. (At least, right now. I could eat these words in the future, but keeping my expectations low)
But thank you for the kind words, not often I get a compliment like that, but I think you’re giving me too much credit. You deserve em more for listening me ramble about... 2 months technically >///>
<3
For him, it's already too late.
I found Furry Fandom at a time I thought I was "straight". What I found was the first (and only) place where I could freely talk about human sexuality, and kinks and fetishes, without the comparing of dick sizes and "ewww, that's gross!" that passes for talking about sex on the rest of the Internet. My reaction to the porn forced me to come to terms with the idea that while I think I'm straight, my... body has a different opinion about what's hot. One that includes males.
I've genuinely used the phrase "I'm not normally into this but..." many times, and meant it. A good artist can make me enjoy a fetish I previously considered a hard limit "no".
It has taken me this long to reach the point where I'm willing to be open and honest and just say what I want.
It's not been easy, because a lot of this consists of looking at porn of bondage, D/s, rape, from the submissive/bottom's point-of-view, wondering what that would be like, what they are feeling, and saying "I want that."
.....and I look at some very "hardcore" kinks.
How much longer would it have taken without that positive influence and acceptance, if ever?
Fantasy is supposed to be the one place we can explore all options, however silly, or ill-advised. We shouldn't need a reason, or have to justify it, or explain it. It doesn't need to make sense. We don't have to understand it ourselves. We can still be figuring ourselves out, or just trying something new, for the hell of it. Nobody is hurt by pixels on a screen.
This whole comment thread is just one big reminder we, as Furries, need to maintain our own safe haven, by ourselves, for ourselves, .....nobody else is going to do it for us.
As for the rest of it...
Fantasy is supposed to be the one place we can explore all options, however silly, or ill-advised. We shouldn't need a reason, or have to justify it, or explain it. It doesn't need to make sense. We don't have to understand it ourselves. We can still be figuring ourselves out, or just trying something new, for the hell of it.
Amen to that, oh yes. Y'know, I remember once someone sharing a picture of a shower cubicle full of Bad Dragons, and there being reactions of surprise and disgust - and I remember thinking, yikes. How boring do you have to be to consider differently shaped dildos to be too far? C'mon. Live a little <3
I'm the kind of person who hides and makes alt accounts :(
What is happening to these people seems to me as though a knee jerk disgust response cannot simply persist on its own. A fantastical tale must justify the disgust, and in this particular tale the subject of the disgust is not simply a small part of the society they reside within, but an actively malignant force bringing about its destruction. This fantastical narrative helps to justify the disgust response enough so as to eventually balloon into a deeper revulsion and possible hatred.
This to my mind explains a vast majority of external loathing directed at the fandom.
Policing internal to the community; two motives spring to mind. On one level, self loathing. Hang ups about their own sexuality that push the person to target the hate at a direction they feel comfortable targeting. Usually someone further down a certain avenue of kinks that the person already feels drawn to.
Or on another level, there is and understandable and deep abiding fear that the external disgust response might result in an eventual or even heightened return to the repressions of the past. There is an attempt to prune the fandom seemingly being played out continually. The idea that if the fandom continues to slice away segments of itself it might someday be chopped down into a shape that can comfortably reside in some theoretical future to the whims of those who fear strange things.
All of these rely deeply on anxiety about the future. Optimism, genuine cooperation, and trust in others is, to our mind, the solution to these problems.
Keep furry weird.
" The idea that if the fandom continues to slice away segments of itself it might someday be chopped down into a shape that can comfortably reside in some theoretical future"
In my experience, this never works. What happens anyway is best described by a dumb meme, but it's true - Haters gonna hate.
We will always, ultimately, be who we are. No amount of repression will change that. But self-exploration can absolutely help and improve how we see and treat others <3
Thanks for your perspectives, both of you. I appreciate 'em <3
I think this journal is a bit of that for the fandom at large. This was a great journal. I definitely agree with the value of self-exploration.
To put it simply, I agree 100%, although I ironically fall into the 'let others dictate me and hide' category. Not even from kink though, I think this advice can be put into a wide variety of situations.
Some of the best friends I ever made on this site are weirdos, though. Especially some goofyass purplehaird yeenthing.
So I understand the drive, but for some...I guess we feel like losing the * idea* of love and affection or being rejected takes over, even though we try to let our weirdness show to some people. But maybe that's the key: even if we're afraid to be 'fully open' we have a circle where we *can* be.
The weirdos on here are honestly some of the most interesting, most engaging, most thoughtful folks I know. I wouldn't change it for the world <3
Edit: I also wish I would read the comments above me before being redundant xD
I love being a weirdo, it's way too fun not to be. Loved the journal, I enjoyed the read.
Thank you very much~
I've often heard that 'art is subversive', and sometimes wondered what exactly that can mean, the full breadth and spectrum of the phrase. But that is certainly one of them :3
I think there is absolutely a valid method in having a secondary account or a gallery elsewhere, though. It's a touch more work for sure - I remember from having two accounts back in the day. On the idea of not grossing people out, I feel like giving them the option to not view takes it out of your hands - if they're curious and get burned, hey, that's on them and I think they'll understand that. I've literally had members of my own family seek out my own art in the past, after I warned them about it - feels a touch embarrassing, but at the end of the day, it doesn't really bother me. It was their choice after all :3
Plus, if you finally get to show off stuff that's important to you, might not that be reason enough? <3
This needs to be said, and repeated. It's already hard enough having to deal with harassment from outside the fandom, but the pressure from within has gotten worse, to the point where even communities that used to be pillars of freedom of expressions are now at risk...
Honestly I'm so shy (even more IRL) but sometimes I've asked myself how I'm going to find new friends or even a possible couple If they don't know this side of me. It's hard to always think on what others will say about you and then I don't want to disturb anyone, because It's not my intention to make others feel unconfortable with me.
Thankfully I haven't reached the point to censor myself in this fandom, I'm drawing/enjoying what I like and I think that's for the best. If people don't like what I do/share, they can look for someone else
I feel like we can all feel so self-conscious sometimes, judge ourselves too much. The flaws we see in ourselves are often just how we are to other people, fun little quirks and delights. We can offer so much, and experience can help reinforce that <3
I'm so glad you're still able to be yourself, hun. People will appreciate that <3
It's become really a sad day when your selection of body shape, or who you want to vote for has become a reason to throw people out of groups and ostracize them. Especially in a group that is - theoretically - so open and welcoming.
This isn't meant to minimise the very real pain and detriment to the fandom caused by such callouts, but to note that it's far, far from a guaranteed threat to any furry. I've not had anything, and I know many, many that you'd think would get called out but hadn't!
I think the unwelcoming minority is just loud, but that doesn't mean it's not small <3
- Artists saying that they are afraid of posting feral stuff, but have never been cofronted to any drama
- Artists reducing their "do's" list in order to "clean their portfolios"
- Even seen a couple of times "I don't draw things that could get me cancelled"
Been drawing feral/non-consensual/underage and all the kinky stuff for 10 years myself, never received any hate.
I think the fear of drama is much higher than the drama itself.
I don't mind the drama much, there have always been and will always be stupid people out there. The real tragedy is when they have impact on artists.
But DarkViolet, there’s plenty of people who are into musk art, as well. *Looking at NighDruth the Dragon and his animations* 😳👀 👉👈
Okay, I’m sure you were just joking when you said, “Not that one.” Right? 🤣
Eheheheh…. 😅
usually im never mean but today decided to be. ever since joining furry social media had to uhhh... ''tone myself down a bit'' since theres only one acceptable opinion and way of life for everything (its based on whats the most morally virtues) and you genuenly cant argue about anything or be called some word ending in -phobic, but this time nah, cuz being fake gets tiring if it builds up. Still can't talk shit about everything tho.
As for getting pushback for your opinions and hurting feelings, that resonates a lot less for me. One of the delights of internet diversity is that we get to engage with people very different from us, hear experiences we've never had, and get to understand very different lives. Sometimes that leads to misunderstandings and upset feelings as we learn what biases, assumptions, and words we've never realised could hurt others. Part of keeping furry weird, of opening up an accepting culture, is to is to learn and cultivate within ourselves a tolerance of that, and to be open to where we have the biases of our parents and how to shed them. That's the way to learn of the humanity or personhood in all of us, to cherish it, and to find beautiful, wonderful, weird new friends <3
it is really hard to be myself because the only close friends i've had over the years would resent me for who i am if they were to find out. i know people will just say to ditch em and not look back, but that's hard when you already have very few friends and are not very good at making new friends.
but, i will keep being me, because if i'm not, then all i will do is spiral (trust me, i've tried suppressing it, to no avail). having no support group or close friends to open up to is hard, but i'm doing my best!
I'm really sorry to hear about those you've lost friendships with, as well as the death threats, jesus. I so hope you have some place, somewhere, you can be your unmasked self <3
I've found people who are surprisingly accepting of sex and kinks, but it takes time, one-at-a-time. (I've learned it's ok if your friends don't know each other, that limits how far the fallout can spread. But that means meeting people one-at-a-time instead of in groups.)
Point is, I think we all have the capacity to do this, and it's easier to do than we think. I think being kind to others and gently leadin' 'em away from such ways of thinking is important <3
Seriously, 100% keep furry weird. Let it be a place for people to explore. Everyone else can just learn to deal with living in a world where there might be something they don’t agree with, don’t understand or don’t like!
I'm so glad you did admit it! It's always so heartwarming to hear it, thank you <3
this is a very good read, thankfully i haven't had any hate for liking anything in all my years, prolly cuz i keep good company and stay away from drama, and that's all i really Need <3
Too many people don't understand what it means to enjoy something in one way but not the other. Just 'cause someone's into non-con doesn't mean they would ever even begin to consider expressing it in the real world, and yet, were they to express it in the wrong place, they would be cast out as a danger to society as if they would, regardless of how responsible a person they may be, or how little their interest applies to real people (or creatures).
I too, have many things I refuse to express openly, because I don't trust that I wouldn't be attacked by those who don't understand that it's possible to enjoy something in exclusively in fantasy where it does no harm, away from the real world harm it might cause otherwise.
After all, neither I nor others can dictate what sparks joy in one's own mind, but we can have the wherewithall to never want to harm another person with it, physically or mentally. Grant us the chance to prove that we're of no danger, and the freedom to be happy in our own self expression. That's all I'd ever ask.
And besides; wouldn't you rather someone go on the internet and enjoy their depravities there, instead of being the person who DOES go out and commit atrocities because they can't sate it any other way?
Posts like this make you a hero in the community!
And aw, thank you! You're very kind <3
Speaking as someone who has become ever more nervous about admitting or discussing some of my own kinks. As I more and more often see people attacked on social media for enjoying certain fetishes in fictional works, this was a very encouraging and refreshing read.
I guess somewhere along the way, despite my awareness of the fandom's history, I lost sight of the forest. Thank you for reminding me.
Keep furry weird. Indeed!
Also, I wish you all the best in your future endeavors! Will the stories of your characters we saw within SPC continue?
And absolutely! I'm not workin' for SPC as much anymore, but oh, those characters are already living so strongly in my mind. I won't be able to stop~
Yeah, basically. I hope such people have never played a video game or watched most films. Violence is rife in media, and it's let us learn its nuances. I hope sex goes the same way at some point :3
But this is not just FA, social media, dead forums of the past or furry fandom.
This is how things changed globally. On level of society and on level of governments. Censorship growing. It were only few decades of calm free time in internet where you could say anything to anyone (i miss that. maybe i were more bold back then).
There's no more.
We're getting restricted. Your words could spell your doom, no matter what country/state we're talking about - you're getting kicked out of your job, cancelled, blocked, hated or... jailed/dead.
Many years i live with knowledge that other people I live with in one state and in the same city can find me, beat and kill me for my words. It happened before, and this keeps happen and not only in my state.
More: you might get a fine or criminal charge for joke, for retweet/sharing a post or for what you're drawing (recently one girl almost got jailed for drawing futas). You won't even say anything, your drawings solely will lead you to problems and giant black stain on your history (good luck to get job) just because your co-worker didn't liked you and decided to snitch.
I never keep any pictures I'd like to keep in my devices, and never keep my social media logged in. It could be checked just on streets randomly.
We're just returning to the past in this matter, but now everyone who wants to harm us has a very convenient tool called internet to track every our fart.
You think you divide your real life and internet. But this is not how it works.
But let's imagine that the internet is something like different planet. Okay.
In the internet? The fact that sharing my nationality leading to being spat on and even blocked on some sites make me question internet even more than reality. I never feel safe to share anything in it, because i know that even my PM's could get watched, and i even saw how people didn't hide they do so, and pointed at some of messages made by me or our chat.
There's no anonymous existence in the internet these days. Every your word is tracked, and this is not some meme about paranoics, this is OUR REALITY.
And once your country will (IT WILL) be so strict about content in internet as mine, you'll see that.
Maybe this sound desperate (I'm kinda happy so don't worry), but safety is an illusion we indulgenced ourselves.
And now or you're bold and lucky, or you're hiding.
I'm happy that I can embrace and express my whole weird, true self among my chosen family and closest friends without shame. Those people are my treasures. The opinions of people I don't know really doesn't feel relevant in my personal enjoyment of kinks and fantasies with my loved ones. Nonetheless, I've grown more guarded about the degree of trust to allow anyone that close, not out of shame but self-protection. It feels like a necessity because I don't have the spoons to deal with the possibility of negative attention from something as harmless and personal as the fantasies I enjoy.
I know it's an old journal but I felt inclined to chime in with my anecdote.
I'm glad you've found your tribe, to use that phrase. When you hear some hatred over who you are or what you do, I think it's easy to fall into the belief that such an opinion is intrinsically important. A lot of the time, it can be someone who doesn't understand, who is injecting themselves into your world - as you say, lost the patience and empathy that others have.
It's far more important to me to cultivate the closer connections, as you indeed do. Those people are the most significant in our lives. If someone online slings hatred because they don't understand me, they never wanted to in the first place. I'm not going to waste time trying to convince them. In those we love, and understand - that's where we'll find the real happiness and delight <3
I myself have things I've hidden from other's, friends and family. As I get older I tend to care less about those with two faces that tell you to "Be yourself" and then reach a topic that they are zealots about and use it against you. That being said I make sure every mate that I have knows upfront as much as possible about what I'm into so we don't waste each other's times and I've been lucky with my last two, one being into the same things and current being tolerant of it. Didn't mean to make this too long winded.
The fact is I agree and appreciate you DV. From this journal entry, to your delightful mind, to your stories, and of course your art and the delightful "taboo" things within it all. I feel comfort visiting your page and acceptance without you ever saying a word. It would be nice to find more people to converse with and explore things that most wouldn't. So thank you for all that you said and I hope to always see your art and you around. <3
I'm so glad that you can feel accepted and comforted from my page. I really do hope it's a place where you can feel that love and kindness as strongly as I can give it <3 And I'm so immensely pleased that you have people in your life that you can share those wonderful parts of yourself ^w^
Someone else mentioned they ended up with a stalker. I had one, had to get an RO. He scoured the internet for anything I posted, anywhere. Ended up convincing a rather large local group of non-furries that I was practicing some pretty harmful stuff, and they would not believe anything to the contrary because I was the new person and he'd been there for a while. (Even though he had already had his fair share of controversy himself) They preemptively banned me from all their meetups because kids attended as well. You can guess what he convinced them I was doing. Because I had favored some DDLG stuff on an adult website. Because I'd mentioned on FB loving a lolita style and wished I could pull it off. Because I'd defended someone getting therapy for their thoughts (who had never acted, knew it was harmful, but I supported them getting help because it was ruining their life). --sigh
Yah, we need to be more accepting. I know there's a huge part of this community that clearly is into vore, inflation, hyper, and obviously accurate cock and puss. But for some strange reason telling someone else feels so...much like a trap. Like if you admit you like looking at consenting feral on anything else you're automatically labeled as being the worst that humanity has to offer. Like..what? Why?! You're on this website too, I've seen your favorites. Me liking feral is somehow worse than your scat images? Huh??? -shutter~ You do you man, I don't ah...put down...your kinks, I don't blast you on everything to make people hate you. Why do you feel the need to do it to me, or others like me?
I've started to give less of a shit what others think of me. My social group offline knows me well enough now to not believe any of the stuff others say about me, thank fuck. They know what is and isn't a lie or a truth. And that's comforting. They accepted me knowing full well I'm a furry. We send funny ass NSFW shit to each other a lot. And thats healthy! I really think it is. Constantly being on edge, worried about what some 20 year old is gonna say about the 40 year old just puts more stress on me. Stress I don't need.
Sorry I know this was long, I just needed to vent I think. Lovely to know how many people showed up for your talk, and clearly support too. I know I scan your comments sections to catch any haters, and I'm always happy to see a lack.
I do think a lot of it comes out of a genuine concern for others, just latching on to an unconscious wish to feel superior and a delight in being allowed to harm another. 'Cause of that, I feel pity for such folks. They're so god damn close to being good people, and accepting those around them...
I really hope they can make that leap. It's so much more wonderful, so much easier and calm for the soul to have that acceptance in your heart.
I'm really glad that you've managed to get to a great place with your groups, and stay disconnected from all that. I definitely work under the idea that you can't change everything, you can't alter the whole world - but man, can you really affect your world, and that of others <3
As for the haters? I can literally count on one paw how many times I've had hate on FA, out of literally tens of thousands of comments. Such hate is a lot less widespread than some people want us to think <3
Also-- random, but that you for responding! Not everyone does and it makes for a weird experience on this side of the keyboard. lol. I'll admit for a while in the past I was very...assertive...when it came to certain beliefs. I calmed down, and it's definitely a lot less stressful!
I should be myself here more, that's precisely why I made this account.
You absolutely should! I hope you have so much fun with being who you are <3
I always hear in the fandom *be yourself*, and *don't judge people based on xyz*, but as soon as something tilts outside someone's personal comfort zone, often the very same people resort to prejudice and hateful comments. I experienced this myself, so this read teared me up a little. :,)
Thank you for this, Dark Violet
Thank you too, Mak!
And honestly, i can't even blame them. I've recently had a long talk to someone who was throwing some strong sentences around. in the end i think he understood just how wrong he was. sadly, not many people would even consider challenging their opinions. hating a thing is just so much easier than understanding it.
violence/non-con, vore, cub, feral and so many more kinks and attractions are just unthinkable in the real world. our little fantasy world is not just the right place to live them out - it's the only place.
that said: nothing is real, everything is permitted. furry needs to stay weird!
It's nice to hear about that chat with the person, though. I genuinely think that a lot of folks out there that would say such hurtful and harmful things don't have that much malice in them - they just haven't though about it long enough, and haven't met the right people. I hope they can, and I hope they grow <3
I'll stay weird for sure. You too, hun <3
I don't want people above me in socioeconomic ladder to know about wyrd stuff I'm into, as my well-being completely depends on them. And we all are familiar with a five handshakes theory.
The possibility is low, but never zero.
Of course, to an extent, I'm sorry we all are - I can preach this message all I want, but even I'm not gonna show some people all of my art, for all kindsa reasons. And I don't wanna muddy the waters of "Be Yourself" with the addendum of "[Except when you shouldn't]", 'cause that's not what I want this to be about...
I guess, for times when you can't or feel unable to - I hope that you, yourself, feel comfortable in who you are. That not mentioning the whole you is a conscious and contented choice, rather than one made in fear. When all else is stripped away, that's the most important part.
But that's good you have some community behind you, wish you luck and endless storm of imagination. If they cut your wings, may they regrow twice as stronger.
Be happy you all at least.
I will grow strong through my will, and the support of so many. I hope you do to <3
The pain of loneliness and being excluded I do know and I don't wish it to anyone, even so the feeling of being unable to feel oneself part of a community.
Proceed then with good luck, I retreat into my den and dissappear