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Life Update [Vent] 10/16/2024
11 months ago
Hello everyone, I hope everyone is doing well n' dandy.
I'd wish to talk about what has been happening these past months, lets just say its been pretty eventful and depressing. I know I should've addressed it early, but I spent more of my time not only doing artwork but distracting myself from what's been going on around me.
Depression
Depression started around about a week before my birthday in July. I was reflecting the things I have done then and where it got me, amongst other things I have one thing that stood out for me. Now don't get me wrong, I love caring for my friends and showing that I care. However, doing it over the span of few years I realized I'm doing too much though receiving so little for the sake of friendship. At first I saw it as I was getting used and that people are only interested in me because of my artwork and not my well being. My depression lasted for half a month, only lowering my self esteem since I knew few or none will do the same efforts as I did for them.
Same thing during and after my birthday happened in July, so little in return from family and I felt even more less valued despite the good I have done for myself thinking I have done good. I have, but I guess I won't get recognized for it.
The art piece and journal that I have put out here for my birthday ( https://www.furaffinity.net/view/57424559/ , https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10907029/ ) , that was to put out there that my birthday was going to happen! No one bothered even having a look at it....
Displacement
I will not go into full detail of what happened, but I was returning home from my summer vacation and was prepared to start my college semester. It was going well smoothly at first, though until it wasn't. Shit hit the fan and went into shock which prevented me to continue my studies which was terrible. I had to relocate with my cousins whom welcomed me into their living space where I'd kick off life instead of my original home. It'll take time to manage my new environment and to fully recover from this shithole of a year I have been through.
Ever since I got displaced from my original home, my original family (last name wise) have grown distant from me. By the looks of things, I might as well be the last family member of a family that once was a "family." I made a hard decision to make during a phone call with my mother who refused to accept that I have moved away, and putting words into my mouth that I didn't even say. I decided to break up with her and not to speak to her again, it brings a tear to my eye that breaking up with my mother who I ever loved for my life forced me to make such a decision. Now, she'll have to adjust and accept that one of her sons are not going to see her again.
I don't ask for much, and I don't even bother asking for much... I'll only ask this once though...
Please give me support... I'm tired of being who I am and put through enough stress in my life... please...
I'd wish to talk about what has been happening these past months, lets just say its been pretty eventful and depressing. I know I should've addressed it early, but I spent more of my time not only doing artwork but distracting myself from what's been going on around me.
Depression
Depression started around about a week before my birthday in July. I was reflecting the things I have done then and where it got me, amongst other things I have one thing that stood out for me. Now don't get me wrong, I love caring for my friends and showing that I care. However, doing it over the span of few years I realized I'm doing too much though receiving so little for the sake of friendship. At first I saw it as I was getting used and that people are only interested in me because of my artwork and not my well being. My depression lasted for half a month, only lowering my self esteem since I knew few or none will do the same efforts as I did for them.
Same thing during and after my birthday happened in July, so little in return from family and I felt even more less valued despite the good I have done for myself thinking I have done good. I have, but I guess I won't get recognized for it.
The art piece and journal that I have put out here for my birthday ( https://www.furaffinity.net/view/57424559/ , https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10907029/ ) , that was to put out there that my birthday was going to happen! No one bothered even having a look at it....
Displacement
I will not go into full detail of what happened, but I was returning home from my summer vacation and was prepared to start my college semester. It was going well smoothly at first, though until it wasn't. Shit hit the fan and went into shock which prevented me to continue my studies which was terrible. I had to relocate with my cousins whom welcomed me into their living space where I'd kick off life instead of my original home. It'll take time to manage my new environment and to fully recover from this shithole of a year I have been through.
Ever since I got displaced from my original home, my original family (last name wise) have grown distant from me. By the looks of things, I might as well be the last family member of a family that once was a "family." I made a hard decision to make during a phone call with my mother who refused to accept that I have moved away, and putting words into my mouth that I didn't even say. I decided to break up with her and not to speak to her again, it brings a tear to my eye that breaking up with my mother who I ever loved for my life forced me to make such a decision. Now, she'll have to adjust and accept that one of her sons are not going to see her again.
I don't ask for much, and I don't even bother asking for much... I'll only ask this once though...
Please give me support... I'm tired of being who I am and put through enough stress in my life... please...
