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My Mental Journey for 2025
9 months ago
*Wipes Sweat from Brow*
The pressure of bringing Art back into my life and getting out of Hiatus-Mode has been intense! Why? Well, let's look back. In the past, I was a Hermit. I just wanted to Draw Damsels in Distress and share them to the world and hoped the world would embrace me. Buuuut the universe had different plans. Back then my Family was not so supporting of the filth and smut they stumbled upon in my room. This traumatized me into arting in secret. It sucked. It sucked a LOT! Luckily, in the Late 2000's I was finally able to get my own place and I drew like a MAD MAN while working in telemarketing. After about 4 years a crippling unemployment streak landed me back with Family. *sighs* And in 2015 I decided to drop numerous hobbies as a side-effect of depression including Art and Fabrication. Around 2018, I made decision to erase my old Handle. My Mental Health floundered for years since I landed back home. Nothing seemed to work for finances and happiness. But I wasn't a quitter, I was a survivor.
Other those years in survivor-mode I learned the importance of Networking and Discussing Hobbies. And in Q4 2023, I decided to start good habits surrounding Hobbies and Scheduling when I did them. Thankfully a majority of them suck with me throughout the year. And in Q4 2024 I decided to say, "Fuck the Haters! I'm drawing Damsel in Distress again!" I had plenty of ideas but my ADHD was a hindrance and my skills were mega rusty. But here we are 2025! The rust is mostly gone but the Anxiety and Mental Health issues never left. I am also on this journey with NO PEERS to chat, discuss, or bounce ideas off of. And this is where the Mental Health for 2025 is gonna be key.
My anxiety sky rockets when I try to draw during the day. I just can't! I don't live by myself and the Family has NEVER supported anything but, "going to work and getting paid". They are not Creatives like me. They sit down and are quick to judge and never listen to what others have to say. So the practice of Arting Secretly is still a thing in 2025 *sighs* But now I am encountering the OTHER problems of being a Lone Artist. Being my own Worst Critic. And without peers cheering you on, providing constructive criticism, the critics in my head are hindering me from lifting my pencil. To prevent myself from quitting early I am reaching out on Twitter, Bluesky, and Discord. Joining Groups relative to my Kinks and Interest. And trying to NOT sound like a pompous new guy, flooding servers with my crusty old works from early 2010's. Remembering what I learned about spacing posts out, and patience. I'm trying to Grow my circle in Art. But I neglected to mention my Double-Life. I can't parade around as Me with all these Kinky Illustrations. I wanted to keep my normal life pure and untainted. So, I created this NSFW handle ZytherDark. (Well, I had it since 2018). And got all my socials, email, and accounts lined up. Now it's up to Time. And whether or not my Mentality can handle Drawing again in the shadows of Family. Not to mention getting out of my own head.
So if you're reading this. I would love to hear your words of encouragement and praise in the comments. Even those emoji-reactions in the Discord servers I'm in truly fuels my Extroverted Soul. Please follow my Socials in the Linktr.ee link. Share my Works. And if you're a fellow artist please tell me what you think. I love communicating about Art. Looking at How to Draw Tutorials, Surfing through Galleries, and learning all I can to improve my style. If things go smoothly. In Q2 of 2025 I would like to play with this Kamvas Pro 16 I have and learn to digitally Ink and Color my works. Both Old and New. But it all rides on the Mental Health Journey I am on. Thank you so much for listening. I'll see you guys in the comments.
~ZD~
The pressure of bringing Art back into my life and getting out of Hiatus-Mode has been intense! Why? Well, let's look back. In the past, I was a Hermit. I just wanted to Draw Damsels in Distress and share them to the world and hoped the world would embrace me. Buuuut the universe had different plans. Back then my Family was not so supporting of the filth and smut they stumbled upon in my room. This traumatized me into arting in secret. It sucked. It sucked a LOT! Luckily, in the Late 2000's I was finally able to get my own place and I drew like a MAD MAN while working in telemarketing. After about 4 years a crippling unemployment streak landed me back with Family. *sighs* And in 2015 I decided to drop numerous hobbies as a side-effect of depression including Art and Fabrication. Around 2018, I made decision to erase my old Handle. My Mental Health floundered for years since I landed back home. Nothing seemed to work for finances and happiness. But I wasn't a quitter, I was a survivor.
Other those years in survivor-mode I learned the importance of Networking and Discussing Hobbies. And in Q4 2023, I decided to start good habits surrounding Hobbies and Scheduling when I did them. Thankfully a majority of them suck with me throughout the year. And in Q4 2024 I decided to say, "Fuck the Haters! I'm drawing Damsel in Distress again!" I had plenty of ideas but my ADHD was a hindrance and my skills were mega rusty. But here we are 2025! The rust is mostly gone but the Anxiety and Mental Health issues never left. I am also on this journey with NO PEERS to chat, discuss, or bounce ideas off of. And this is where the Mental Health for 2025 is gonna be key.
My anxiety sky rockets when I try to draw during the day. I just can't! I don't live by myself and the Family has NEVER supported anything but, "going to work and getting paid". They are not Creatives like me. They sit down and are quick to judge and never listen to what others have to say. So the practice of Arting Secretly is still a thing in 2025 *sighs* But now I am encountering the OTHER problems of being a Lone Artist. Being my own Worst Critic. And without peers cheering you on, providing constructive criticism, the critics in my head are hindering me from lifting my pencil. To prevent myself from quitting early I am reaching out on Twitter, Bluesky, and Discord. Joining Groups relative to my Kinks and Interest. And trying to NOT sound like a pompous new guy, flooding servers with my crusty old works from early 2010's. Remembering what I learned about spacing posts out, and patience. I'm trying to Grow my circle in Art. But I neglected to mention my Double-Life. I can't parade around as Me with all these Kinky Illustrations. I wanted to keep my normal life pure and untainted. So, I created this NSFW handle ZytherDark. (Well, I had it since 2018). And got all my socials, email, and accounts lined up. Now it's up to Time. And whether or not my Mentality can handle Drawing again in the shadows of Family. Not to mention getting out of my own head.
So if you're reading this. I would love to hear your words of encouragement and praise in the comments. Even those emoji-reactions in the Discord servers I'm in truly fuels my Extroverted Soul. Please follow my Socials in the Linktr.ee link. Share my Works. And if you're a fellow artist please tell me what you think. I love communicating about Art. Looking at How to Draw Tutorials, Surfing through Galleries, and learning all I can to improve my style. If things go smoothly. In Q2 of 2025 I would like to play with this Kamvas Pro 16 I have and learn to digitally Ink and Color my works. Both Old and New. But it all rides on the Mental Health Journey I am on. Thank you so much for listening. I'll see you guys in the comments.
~ZD~
