Hey man i feel that on the same level. Most of the time its all in your head since with myself i hyper focus on the negatives and that overruns my positive thoughts on anything

I kinda figured but it's just frustrating. One minute I'll be just fine and then it just hits me like a wave or a wall of sadness.

i got it this morning, more so is what i do worth the effort or worry. and then i worry about if i am doing enough for people or if i need to do more in a way. I just think that in life, you are your own main character but you are your own villain as well. Only you can help yourself and only you can stop yourself doing it. im probably repeating stuff you have heard before.
The way i see it just take life as slow as you want until you feel ready to up the pace, no one is born in this world and is an expert on living, we all figure that shit out along the way and we all have different ways to go around it.

I feel for you. I've been a mental mess but I get through each day as best as I can, yet I can't help think any and every possible negative thing a person can think off. I AM much better than I was before COVID and still am good in some regards, but I still have so much I don't like and such -_-'

Appreciate the kind words dorgan really I do and yeah I'm definitely trying