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FWA 2025
4 months ago
Was nice seeing everyone at FWA, but I think I'm done with the con for the rest of the weekend.
I tried going to the vore meet and greet last night, and I was very excited to meet certain people I knew would be there but it was so packed that I felt like I was swimming in an ocean of people who "belonged more". Honestly, the entire con has felt that way.
People who already knew each other, no room to actually find people I wanted to talk to. It's sort of creating a cyclic emotional roller coaster right now. I think going to *ANY* event, as much as I want to in the moment, isn't entirely healthy for me, but that's also how I meet people, so I'm in a catch-22. It's hard for me to be in spaces with people who are already so ingrained in their own social circles. It can tip off that "you're alone and don't belong" feeling more than normal.
It finally hit me that I just don't enjoy furry events if I'm not fursuiting. The last several cons have left me depressed and miserable, and I'm certain that's why.
No more cons until I have a new fursuit.
Just wandering around watching other people have fun or sitting alone in a panel with no one to talk to is profoundly sad. I can't do it anymore.
The Fandom is nothing like it was back when I first attended FWA eighteen years ago.
I have no idea if I changed or the Fandom did, but I have no idea how to fix this other than getting a new fursuit and hoping that brings back the magic.
Maybe it won't and end up being a waste, but I might as well try.
I tried going to the vore meet and greet last night, and I was very excited to meet certain people I knew would be there but it was so packed that I felt like I was swimming in an ocean of people who "belonged more". Honestly, the entire con has felt that way.
People who already knew each other, no room to actually find people I wanted to talk to. It's sort of creating a cyclic emotional roller coaster right now. I think going to *ANY* event, as much as I want to in the moment, isn't entirely healthy for me, but that's also how I meet people, so I'm in a catch-22. It's hard for me to be in spaces with people who are already so ingrained in their own social circles. It can tip off that "you're alone and don't belong" feeling more than normal.
It finally hit me that I just don't enjoy furry events if I'm not fursuiting. The last several cons have left me depressed and miserable, and I'm certain that's why.
No more cons until I have a new fursuit.
Just wandering around watching other people have fun or sitting alone in a panel with no one to talk to is profoundly sad. I can't do it anymore.
The Fandom is nothing like it was back when I first attended FWA eighteen years ago.
I have no idea if I changed or the Fandom did, but I have no idea how to fix this other than getting a new fursuit and hoping that brings back the magic.
Maybe it won't and end up being a waste, but I might as well try.
I really feel you on the difficulty in socializing if you are not already in a group. I pretty much won't go to a con unless I've got at least one close friend to room with who'll hang close. Sometimes I can rope them into it under the guise of me needing a fursuit handler, lol. It does limit what cons I go to, and I'm far less likely going to check out a small con if I don't have friends to room with or know of any attending. (Made the mistake of going to a small con a few years ago and luckily I was rooming with someone whose company I enjoy because neither of us knew anyone else there and the con was so boring that we spent a lot of the time in the room just watching twitch streams :p
In my experience in the last few years, vore meets have always been crazy packed. Tried to go to the one at tff earlier this year and it was overflowing out into the hallway. Thankfully the macro/micro meets are usually more manageable (and I know a lot more people in the macro community than the vore community so usually have better luck finding people to chat with)