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Political beliefs vs personality
2 months ago
I was sitting here thinking for a moment and thought of some thing I figured was worth sharing. I see a lot of political divide now a days between people and it makes me question if politics is really important enough to make people avoid one another or if it MIGHT be because too many people make politics their personality similar to how many topics today become the ONLY thing some people can talk about.
So, for example, lets say you've had a friend for years and you've been good friends who hang out and do other stuff together. Now lets say while the two of you are hanging out, your friend mentions the latest supreme court ruling or some law that was passed in Florida or something Trump said/did and its something you don't agree with; but your friend says they don't see why its a issue or worse says they agree with the thing you don't like.
Does this one single event, this one facet of who they are suddenly negate all of the good times you've had with this person and NOW you don't want to be around them?
Shockingly, the answer now a days to that question is YES. There have been a lot of marriages which ended because one of the members voted a different way than the other (remember, women statistically initiate the majority of divorces), as well as non-marriage relationships broken up by hot button political issues.
Why I find this do insane is two fold: first, people tend to forgive or overlook wrong doing by people they agree with generally (despite how many accusations there were against Michael Jackson, people kept buying his music). And second, how can we understand other people's points of view if we are so locked into our own beliefs that we have to expel any who has a differing opinion so we can be isolated in a echo chamber (AKA modern colleges and network news channels). Debate is healthy for a society and even if you know what you say will not sway the opinion of the other person, its still good to sit and talk it out like our ancestors did. Yes, eventually you might reach the point our ancestors did and start fighting but too many people now a days either walk away or jump right to assaulting one another.
Think of it this way, if an artist you watch on here and enjoy their work suddenly posted a picture you didn't like, would you stop watching them and never look at their art again? Probably not. Now lets say they posted a politically motivate picture or journal on here you don't like? Sadly, knowing the people who frequent FA, I'm sure some would unwatch said artist and at least one would fill out a trouble ticket to report them or start some group on social media to slander or harass them.
If you're reading this journal, I'm assuming you are tolerant of my opinion enough to keep following me which says something positive about you given my stance on some issues as I can honestly see people watching me for the porn I post and avoiding my journals all together.
But back to the topic I started, people who make politics (or gender/sexuality/ect.) their personality instead of just one part of their topics. These people are easy to spot, you just have to talk to them once and you'll know every thing you need to know about them. Like I said before, you find out some thing new about a long term friend, that friend is still the same person but now you know some thing new about them. Its the same argument people made years ago during the gay rights movement when you found out some one you knew was gay or whatever and you got shamed if you stopped being friends with them because of it. Now a days its some one telling you they voted for Trump or don't like abortion that makes people distance them. Are you all really that petty that some one who's been a good friend for a long time suddenly became the enemy? Just think about that for a bit and question your own value system.
So, for example, lets say you've had a friend for years and you've been good friends who hang out and do other stuff together. Now lets say while the two of you are hanging out, your friend mentions the latest supreme court ruling or some law that was passed in Florida or something Trump said/did and its something you don't agree with; but your friend says they don't see why its a issue or worse says they agree with the thing you don't like.
Does this one single event, this one facet of who they are suddenly negate all of the good times you've had with this person and NOW you don't want to be around them?
Shockingly, the answer now a days to that question is YES. There have been a lot of marriages which ended because one of the members voted a different way than the other (remember, women statistically initiate the majority of divorces), as well as non-marriage relationships broken up by hot button political issues.
Why I find this do insane is two fold: first, people tend to forgive or overlook wrong doing by people they agree with generally (despite how many accusations there were against Michael Jackson, people kept buying his music). And second, how can we understand other people's points of view if we are so locked into our own beliefs that we have to expel any who has a differing opinion so we can be isolated in a echo chamber (AKA modern colleges and network news channels). Debate is healthy for a society and even if you know what you say will not sway the opinion of the other person, its still good to sit and talk it out like our ancestors did. Yes, eventually you might reach the point our ancestors did and start fighting but too many people now a days either walk away or jump right to assaulting one another.
Think of it this way, if an artist you watch on here and enjoy their work suddenly posted a picture you didn't like, would you stop watching them and never look at their art again? Probably not. Now lets say they posted a politically motivate picture or journal on here you don't like? Sadly, knowing the people who frequent FA, I'm sure some would unwatch said artist and at least one would fill out a trouble ticket to report them or start some group on social media to slander or harass them.
If you're reading this journal, I'm assuming you are tolerant of my opinion enough to keep following me which says something positive about you given my stance on some issues as I can honestly see people watching me for the porn I post and avoiding my journals all together.
But back to the topic I started, people who make politics (or gender/sexuality/ect.) their personality instead of just one part of their topics. These people are easy to spot, you just have to talk to them once and you'll know every thing you need to know about them. Like I said before, you find out some thing new about a long term friend, that friend is still the same person but now you know some thing new about them. Its the same argument people made years ago during the gay rights movement when you found out some one you knew was gay or whatever and you got shamed if you stopped being friends with them because of it. Now a days its some one telling you they voted for Trump or don't like abortion that makes people distance them. Are you all really that petty that some one who's been a good friend for a long time suddenly became the enemy? Just think about that for a bit and question your own value system.
the reason i can stay friends with them is simple. they arent expecting me to explicitly bend to their opinions or actively restrict my rights directly. Sure some of them are very anti 2A or very anti LGBT or hate the freedom of personal transportation or just absolutely despise free enterprise. But none of them are trying to personally harm my life, livelihood, or interests with direct action outside of their votes which, lets be real, dont matter in the USA.
If politics makes your personality such that even just hearing an opposing view sends you into a spiral, it isnt the political views that are the problem it is the personality of whoever holds those views.
And on and on it goes.
The point is, I still watch their account. I still admire their new artwork. I don't like that part of their personality I was exposed to so it's always got a slightly sour note, but I'm not going to deprive myself of their artwork or not point people in their direction when wanting cool artists of a particular style just because I don't get on with them.
Additionally, I'm a cocksmith. There's another cocksmith that I kinda have beef with; he's rude, arrogant, stubborn, shits on other people when they're not around, tries to ruin other people's good times, he's an asshole. So, I don't have civil conversation with him outside of mutual groups, but if someone asks, for example, for the best place in their region to get a specific kind of toy? Yeah, I'll suggest they go to him, because he's got the goods, even if he's an asshole. I don't suggest they grab a drink with the guy and chat, because he's an asshole, and I won't shy away from that view because he's so constantly re-inforcing it. Still, if people want to be friends with him, and friends with me, they can do that just fine.
Another example from the other side; I was friends with a guy. Weird shit goin' on with him that's not worth getting into, but he joined up with some far-right political group or at least supports their ideals. Lots of people around him shit on him for that, and additionally for being... unpleasant and stupid. I don't like the guy; he's let me down enough times that I decided we're probably not good friend material, but I still support the guy to this day. Say he's unreliable? Totally agree. Say he only thinks with his dick? Absolurely. Say he's stupid? Hey now, I don't think he's stupid, that's harsh.
It serves everybody to have some fucking principles, frankly. Personal principles they build up on their own, isn't just a copypaste of some political narrative and put some EFFORT into, but a lot of people... they have busy lives, nobody's forcing them to have distinct views of their own, why would they bother with all that hard work?
While it's easy to see it as "people changing", I think people have ALWAYS felt strongly about their morals, and politics often is a negotiation of morals. Thing is, "people" in a broad sense Don't Change. There is a reason we are calling it a "rise of tribalism" and it's not because tribes are a brand new concept.
Don't forget that at one point the political divide included whether or not "the negroes" were "people". That was politics. I think it's safe to say that if someone brought this view up today, it would be problematic. I'm not sure I would maintain a friendship with this person today.
But you know what? If he sold me the bread, and I did not have other options to buy bread, I think I would still have to buy bread from him. Thus, I would have to be Polite. That is not the same thing as maintaining a friendship. Life requires nuance and nuance is lost on the Internet. Which is, again, how most people connect anymore.
I have some hot takes but I don't see any gain by imposing them anywhere