Hi everyone, I want to give an update on how I am doing. Mentally it is almost like I am in the clouds and I am still trying to get it together, I think I am managing it though, ever since I decided to cancel the writing side of things I have been feeling better. One thing I am having trouble with though is for some reason I have this skittish feeling about coming back online, I think it is because I am still emberresed, I am trying to move through it, but I want everyone to know that your support is helping me fight through it and I greatly thank you for that. I don't know when I'll be back to being active on Discord, but I am working my way back up, I have learned I can't rush it, I wish it was instant, I really do wish I could just press a button and I would be back together but sadly it is going to take some time. And no I am not feeling hesitent because I have been attacked or harrassed, if that was happening I would definitly say something.

I don't really feel like drawing at the moment, but I have been trying to get back into things by tackling my backlog of models. I think the best way I can put it is, I need to build my confidence and self esteem back up again.

A big problem with the drawing side is that a good chunk of it was to back the writing up, I still am working on switching things around when I announced my plan, I know it has only been a week, but what I am trying to do is find a new rythmn when it comes to creating things. I do have a goal though, to try to post at least once a week. I am still tripping over myself but I am not flatout crashing anymore. I am working on installing I don't need to write the big storylines at all in order to really draw, mostly because I was worried about giving potential spoilers or anything along those lines.

My main focus right now is on getting my creative stride going again and getting back to creating things, I have ideas, I am just trying to find that drive again, I need to get the homefront working again first and once that is secured I can start going for everything else. Plus also doing these journals is also helping as it does help me get my thoughts out there, mentally and emotionally I am still processing things and still trying to work things out, but I am happy that because I have decided to remove the writing part of it I am not stuck at my laptop basically all the time.

March is where I plan on using it to try to get my basic footing back and then go from there to summerize a little, still a little stressed but I working on things best I can.

For old time sake I think I will share here the first major thing I created for the Magna-Verse and quite a big personal project, the Crusader Video is something that took me a whole month to create and I drew up quite a lot to do it, thankfully I have gotten better at taking pics and my drawing has gotten better since then, I have done a few other videos for the Magna-Verse but this is the one that really got it going. I still remember filling practically a whole sketchbook up with all the panels and scenes, by the end I was exhausted but it was a lot of fun and I really wish I can post it on FA, heck every time I hear the song for it my mind instantly plays the video and it always puts a smile on my face. I'll post the link to the video on my DA if anyone wants to check it out. I doubt I will ever do another video project even if I do get back up to how I was, because they just take a long time^^;

Crusader Video: https://www.deviantart.com/magnumwo.....udio-910108642

I think I will leave this journal here, not as long as what I normally do, but I wanted to keep everyone in the loop and help to show how I am doing.

I hope everyone is having a good day or night where you are.^^ *hugs*