So the world has literally turned upside down on me now. my ex has suddenly changed her mind and decided to try a friendship with me.

Fuckin' wonderful... Just when I finally, truly moved on, this happens. I thought I could be done with this. I was... and now she comes running back, telling me this and that, and that she's not doing well. Me... being the person I am, I was perfectly willing to accept it. But now? are you damn kidding me? -sigh- now I'm in a lose-lose situation, because if this friendship grows, my feelings will grow back, and I'll be left here to sink in them while she goes about life with another man! GOD.... and on the other hand, if I just toss her ass out and be done with it... I can't. I could never do that. I've been torn apart enough. too much pain has resulted from what happened for me to cause myself more grief. Tossing her off and leaving it be would hurt her, and in turn hurt me.

so what the fuck am I supposed to do?! I can't just sit here and let my emotions be played like a fucking violin! ...and yet I can't protect myself, because of a guilty conscience.

Wasn't it enough punishment to lose the love of my life?! and now my mistake comes back for another round.

hmph... I have no choice but to let things play out from here, and try to get things to go well between her and I.

Other than that, I'm making my way slowly, doing better for myself in life. Not much to say on that.

Krech... Rex... I really need help now... Please?