When I was but a lad, I would cheat at video games every chance I got. I had game genies and game sharks for all my stupid little Nintendo consoles with all my stupid little Nintendo games. The first thing I'd do upon discovering some new PC game demo was look online for cheat codes. I'd played one, maybe two "ordinary" games of The Sims. All the rest were bizarre social and architectural experiments using money and item placement cheats. I have a cousin who seems have a new Steam account every other week due to being VAC banned. I look at his activities with a mixture of regret and disdain, but I probably would have done the same when I was his age. I'm just lucky online gaming wasn't as prevalent back then.

Which segues me into Starcraft. I bought Starcraft pretty much the day it came out. I awaited with eager anticipation the release of Brood War. I LOVED that game. I loved the ambiance, the story. One thing I didn't like, though, was skirmishes against the computer. See, I was terrible at Starcraft, mostly because I cheated. Voraciously. I'd cheat my way through the single player campaigns, built custom maps that pitted my powerful forces against a swarm of weak enemies. I never even tried multiplayer, and skirmishes against the computer were difficult because, if I recall correctly, cheats applied to everyone on the map.

The computer terrified me. I'd get a sizable force going in my base, only to discover that the computer had seized control of the entire map. I could never get my head around expanding. Hell, I could never get my head around building more than a small handful of workers, or more than one barracks, or hotkeying a comsat station ... I was so used to cheating my way through single player that I couldn't adapt against an actual opponent (or playing another race, ha. I stuck exclusively to Terran).

And ... that just kind of carried over. I eventually learned to actually PLAY games, and even got good at other RTSs, but Starcraft always kind of haunted me. So when I heard about the Starcraft 2 beta opt-in, I kind of panicked. Oh wow, that looks really fun, but they're sticking to the same mechanics, and I'm just not fast enough, and I suck at Starcraft anyway, etc etc.

So I picked up the original again, and played through single player. And got good at it. And then I played a skirmish, and got my ass kicked. So I watched the replay, learned from my mistakes, played it again and won. I play another skirmish, macro up my economy, nearly fall to an attacking force at my back door, but hold it off and eventually prevail. I play more single player campaigns. I systematically expand across the entire map while keeping up a strong economy, guarding my bases, harassing the enemy workers and attacking with a diverse range of units. I AM READY.

So I opt-in to the beta. FAR TOO LATE. And hope that a new wave of invites happens soon. Hoh hum.



TL;DR: WINNERS DON'T DO DRUGS CHEAT, and I rant about Starcraft for some reason.