Emotional omorashi
14 years ago
I'm not really sure if this is an appropriate place to put this, but fuck it.
Lately I've been suffering from a variety of emotional burdens, and I've been trying to stifle them... but I've also been thinking about things philosophically, and trying to come up with parallel situations to compare this to in order to find a solution. For whatever reason, I feel the incessant need to engage in a romantic relationship, and I've been having emotional breakdowns left and right, they're very intense, and seemingly uncontrollable, and the more I fight my need for romance, the more intense and frequent these slips happen.
But it just got me thinking... I've always been a very logical person. I've always denied my emotions of the wonders of romance, love, sex, and many forms of friendship. It makes me think that maybe my emotional outbursts are, basically, a failure to contain my emotional bladder; The small jets of urine that force their way out when your bladder literally just can not take it anymore.
If this metaphor is consistent, then it would seem that my solution is not to try to stifle my desperate urge to engage in romance, for this is an inevitable battle, but to do my best to do it on my own terms: The emotional bladder WILL dispense itself one way or another, I just have to make sure it does this in the most appropriate context possible.
Emotions are often a negative thing, yes, for they consume a lot of time, energy, and resources... But does not every other mandatory bodily function? I mean, it'd be nice if we could stop eating, or stop sleeping, or stop pissing... and we can stop them for a time, but ultimately, we WILL fail, so it behooves us to eat before we're starving, sleep before we're exhausted, and piss before we lose control involuntarily... In the same respect, perhaps it's best that I simply acknowledge that I am not "beyond" emotions, that I need (not want, NEED) it just as much anyone else does.
*sigh* now to find a bathroom...
Lately I've been suffering from a variety of emotional burdens, and I've been trying to stifle them... but I've also been thinking about things philosophically, and trying to come up with parallel situations to compare this to in order to find a solution. For whatever reason, I feel the incessant need to engage in a romantic relationship, and I've been having emotional breakdowns left and right, they're very intense, and seemingly uncontrollable, and the more I fight my need for romance, the more intense and frequent these slips happen.
But it just got me thinking... I've always been a very logical person. I've always denied my emotions of the wonders of romance, love, sex, and many forms of friendship. It makes me think that maybe my emotional outbursts are, basically, a failure to contain my emotional bladder; The small jets of urine that force their way out when your bladder literally just can not take it anymore.
If this metaphor is consistent, then it would seem that my solution is not to try to stifle my desperate urge to engage in romance, for this is an inevitable battle, but to do my best to do it on my own terms: The emotional bladder WILL dispense itself one way or another, I just have to make sure it does this in the most appropriate context possible.
Emotions are often a negative thing, yes, for they consume a lot of time, energy, and resources... But does not every other mandatory bodily function? I mean, it'd be nice if we could stop eating, or stop sleeping, or stop pissing... and we can stop them for a time, but ultimately, we WILL fail, so it behooves us to eat before we're starving, sleep before we're exhausted, and piss before we lose control involuntarily... In the same respect, perhaps it's best that I simply acknowledge that I am not "beyond" emotions, that I need (not want, NEED) it just as much anyone else does.
*sigh* now to find a bathroom...