So, I've been gone for quite a while. I'm sure many of you are not happy with me, and I don't blame you, but I can't honestly say I regret taking such a long hiatus. If you're interested in hearing what went down, please, keep reading c: Though, please refrain from any criticism. I'm well aware that a paid artist shouldn't go AWOL, and I'll be hashing everything out with said paying commissioners, whether they choose to understand my situation or not.

(Please note that this isn't for sympathy or anything of the like. I'm only offering an explanation to those who're curious. I stick by my decisions and I don't need anyone to pat me on the ass for the things I do.)

So...where to start....I guess it would make more sense if I start with my biological father passing away at an early age. Has nothing to do with why I left, but it gives you a clearer picture of why my mother was such a drugged up mess of a single parent and why my grandfather had to literally rescue me from several, potentially traumatic, situation involving strange men, lots of booze and beach side motel rooms. This also has nothing to do with why I left. Bear with me. I just need you to realize how completely devastated I was when my grandfather died of lung cancer. And that IS why I left. If he had been chronically ill for years, or even months, I don't think it would have affected me so deeply. I'd have had time to prepare. But he was only "sick" for 5 weeks. (Or at least, he didn't tell anyone until 5 weeks before his death) He was in the hospital, and then he wasn't. The doctors were really hopeful. And then he was in hospice. For a day. And then he was dead. He changed everything he was when I was born because he knew I needed him, and my gratitude for all of the things he did for me, didn't do me a single favor when I took the one way flight back home, leaving everything I had to arrive in my childhood home to find most of his things stolen, including his ashes, the will missing and my family had completely fallen apart. I didn't lose everything, but damn near close. Some of the little things hurt too, once the world started spinning again, like the fact that I had to leave my dog behind, because I thought "surely I would be returning" only to have one of my closest friends pull everything out from under me, breaking the lease on our apartment and never contacting me again. I'm sure by now he's either sold Fenrir or given him away. Either would be better than him keeping the dog in a crate all day covered in his own piss matted fur.

At the end of the day, I thought it might not be too terrible. I met someone from my past and we sparked something. And then there was a liiiiiiiittle accident. And now....? Lets just say I no longer have the luxury of worrying about myself. I'm still not sure how I feel about any of this, to be completely honest.