This is something that has been on my mind every monday. I have night class and because its pretty boring i always take my laptop. So usually i sign on to AIM and MSN messengers. I always think its funny that i have these lists of "friends" on there, and there is quite a few and i never hear from them, they dont say anything to me and most of them know that i never start a conversation cause i dont want to pester them if they are busy or anything like that, they have to message me just to start, so i know they arent busy. Then ill talk to them as much as they want me to. Usually i just sit there for no reason. so i guess i just shouldnt sign on anymore.... its like so annoying i would like to talk to people but some have actually told me that "oh im sorry, i know you were having a hard time and everything, and when my life was in the shitter you were there, but im happy now so i didnt want to get involved with you or talk to you, and help you out."

its like really? my life is fine, now but it wasnt last year i was still in one of those shit moods all the time and these people that i helped when they couldnt handle anything, but when i needed it not that long ago noone was there unless i did something rather uncomfortable, which was go to someone instead of them coming to me.

The worst thing is that most of these friends still watch me here on FA, so maybe they will read this maybe they wont..... either way if you feel you are one of these people, chances are, you are and i dont hold grudges, and i always give people another chance and im not pissed ^^ cause honestly i dont give a crap anymore lol. so its all good you people :) i promise

*i feeel really weird putting this into a journal, but i feel better now and it also consumed so much time, class is basically over now*