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My Wrestling Ramble
14 years ago
Right, I've decided it's time I should write articles about wrestling and video games and any other things I enjoy. This article will be about wrestling, I'm not even sure where to start. I know that I want to write about the recent happenings in the WWE (RAW and Smackdown!) and TNA. But where do I start? I know that I'm just going to ramble, I'll go off on one and probably lose sight of what I was originally talking about.
But perhaps that's what I need to do? Just ramble. So I guess, I'll talk about the two major storylines on RAW for now.
The big story going on on RAW these days is CM Punk vs. Triple H, a story line that should be much bigger at this point of time, CM Punk should be WWE Champion, but then we'd get into Triple H challenging for the WWE Championship, which is whole different story and a whole different complaint. While I'm happy The Game isn't in the title hunt, CM Punk should be champion, but I guess the WWE pulled the right card in the end, because if Punk was still champion, who would he face? John Cena? We've done that already! Alberto Del Rio? It'd make sense since Alberto did cash in his Money in the Bank briefcase against CM Punk and would probably make for a much better match than Alberto vs. John Cena. But at the same time, Kevin Nash attacked CM Punk after his match at SummerSlam, so CM Punk wanted to deal with that.
But no! Because it's CM Punk vs. Triple H at Night of Champions (in a non title match, but that was the case for Punk last year! At least his non title match at Night of Champions this year is a little more important than his horrible squash match against Big Show last year AND this match will no doubt be the main event, but I digress.) How did we end up in this situation of it being CM Punk vs. Triple H at Night of Champions instead of CM Punk vs. Kevin Nash?
The whole thing seems like one massive work to me. I don't want to give the WWE too much credit and possibly give them credit for something that is just improvisation. To me, it doesn't seem like WWE planned all of this in advance. But they might have!
The whole story is that Nash was supposed to wrestle Punk at Night of Champions, we all know that that would not be a good match. Nash is good, I like the guy, but he's old, his knees are tired, he is just tired in general and probably can't go anymore, especially not in a main event match against CM Punk.
So was the plan the whole time to have Nash "Fired?" and for the match at Night of Champions to be Punk vs. Triple H? I think so. Because as I said, Nash can't go anymore, he can do his jackknife powerbomb, he can big boot. But no way is he able to compete at the level people would expect. Triple H is.
Where do I think this is all heading? In my personal opinion, I think shit is going to go down big time at Night of Champions, there are many possibilites. But I think the most likely one is this; Kevin Nash is not fired 'in real life', hell, it's even possible that he's not even fired as far as kayfabe is concerned. Triple H could very well swerve us all and it turns out that he and Nash were in cohoots the whole time, which would make CM Punk right the whole time. But my opinion is that Kevin Nash will return at Night of Champions, cost Triple H the match so that he has to resign as COO of the company, so that John Larunitis (The Executive Vice President of Talent Relations) can take over WWE entirely. Perhaps that was the whole plan.
I'm a firm believer and have been for several weeks now that John Larunitis is the Annonymous RAW General Manager. Why do I think this? Ever since CM Punk cut that first promo, the infamous one, you know the one. Ever since then the RAW GM has been silent! Vince had been back on screen the week after that, he was booking the matches, so no reason for the RAW GM to e-mail in, and of course, all the weeks after Vince had been relieved of his duties, the GM has still been silent. Mostly because the GM has been on screen! He's been talking to Kevin Nash, talking to Stephanie McMahon (who we haven't seen in a while) constructing this plan to take over the WWE.
But why would Larunitis talk to Stephanie McMahon? Would she screw Triple H out of power? Is Triple H in on this too? So many damn questions and so many potential answers, but I get this horrible, horrible feeling that WWE will (like they do with most big storylines) drop the ball. They'll screw up somewhere along here, I fear that they already screwed up. I mean, just take a look at this stroyline, Nash turned out to be the one who sent that text message to his own phone... Was that a ploy to try and frame Triple H? That makes sense, but why not mention that? It just seemed like they wanted to drop that part of the story line, drop Nash and get him out of there ASAP.
I'm sorry to pose the question again, but why? Why would they want Nash out ASAP? Is it because he was effecting ratings? Was it because his promo skills were not up to scratch? Was it because he's old and can't wrestle? The fact that they announced it on WWE.com with an official release statement makes me think that it's a work, they wanted to make it seem like they just wanted him gone and out of this storyline, they released the official statement on WWE.com to try and work us.
It didn't work, or at least it didn't work on me, I've heard some people saying that they truly believe Nash is gone from the company... And for a while I could see why. That was until WWE.com put up an interview with Mr. Larunitits where he talked about why he got into Kevin Nash's limo. Surely if Nash was done with this storyline they wouldn't mention that anymore.
It's a work. It's a work. It's a work. That's all I can say, which leads us to Night of Champions where Nash will make his "shocking" return... His return will not be the shock, what he does will be the shock!
Kevin Nash as far as storyline is concerned, hates both Punk and Triple H, he has reasons to screw them both. But why screw Punk? Punk has nothing to lose. Triple H has everything to lose and of course, we all know Nash's character. He's all about money, all he wants is money and John Larunitis talking over the company would certainly end up with Nash getting quite the paycheque.
And that's just me talking about one story line on RAW, let's move onto something else!
And that something else is Alberto Del Rio vs. John Cena... Now, I'll just admit right now, I'm not a Cena fan, I've never been a Cena fan. I was hating Cena before it became the cool thing to do. From the day he stepped into a WWE ring and generic pants man from OVW with his little green shorts and gimmick of "I'm a new guy, like me" thing. Him along with Randy Orton, my main gripe was how they both just appeared, how from nowhere they were just suddenly being pushed. It was so long ago I can't even remember why I selected those two to hate on, I mean, I see new people appear in WWE all the time in more recent years and I always give them a chance. Not these two.
At least Orton won me over in the end... Cena though... John Cena wasn't doing much to impress me, he had average matches and all I could think was that he was bland... Bland as hell. But then he got a new gimmick, he turned heel, he became rapper Cena. People started to really like him, despite being a heel, they liked his cocky attitude and his "raps" (more slow paced poetry). I didn't, what I saw was a chav, a nerdy (admittedly well built) white guy with his baseball cap on backwards, shorts sagging down with his ass on display, some stupid sports jersey and generally rude.
I don't like chavs and in my opinion at the time, he was a chav. But then Cena started to change, he turned face, he started to slowly lose the chav gimmick, he stopped raping and he became this guy who seemed okay. Sure he was the obvious face who stood up for all that was right and was a little too patriotic for me. But he had decent moves, decent entrance music and a good attitude.
But then he started to win. He started to win every match, every PPV was main evented by Cena, he started with the stupid coloured t-shirts, the arm bands, the merchandise. He started doing the same match over and over and over, he started to no sell, he started... Well, he started to become Hulk Hogan, "he just moved the hand away from his ear and moved it in front of his face, brother"
I started to hate Cena again at this point, not just dislike, I mean really hate him! And the fact that he is still doing this, all the way since WrestleMania 21 all the way till now isn't helping me like him more, it's not helping anyone like him more. In fact, I'd say more people boo him now than ever before.
But now you know that I hate Cena and why I hate Cena. I'm glad I at least got that off my chest, now I'm going to talk about this feud with Alberto Del Rio.
Let's look at the key points in this feud.
Point Number One: Alberto Del Rio cashed in Money In The Bank:
Alberto Del Rio cashed in his MITB contract against CM Punk as we discussed earlier. Why does Cena have a problem with this? It's none of Cena's business, if anyone should have a gripe, it should be Punk. But he doesn't! He's already said that he accepts what happened because he did it twice before! Why does Cena get so pissed off about this? So much so that he HATES Alberto Del Rio, Cena goes mental at Alberto, he acts like Alberto killed his favorite cat! Cena has no gripe here what so ever.
Point Number Two: Albert Del Rio is a coward and has not defended his title
The first RAW after SummerSlam,Alberto Del Rio had to defend his championship against long time rival Rey Mysterio... Not only was Alberto Del Rio successful in his defence but he also beat Mysterio CLEAN! Something very rare for a heel to do, especially against some one like Mysterio. So Cena comes running out to the ring after that match to chase Alberto (and a little white mouse) away, Cena grabs a mic and says "You can't keep running forever! One day a time will come when you'll have to defend that title!" Err, hello? He just defended it cleanly not 2 minutes ago Cena! What is your problem?
Point Number Three: Alberto Del Rio doesn't know much about cars yet has many.
This is the most redicules one of them all! John Cena is a fan of cars, this much I know, I've seen that episode of Cribs where they go to John Cena's house, he's got about 10 cars, all of them are flashy sports cars. Cena's problem with Alberto Del Rio is that while ADR has many cars, he doesn't know much about them, except how to drive them. John Cena also accuses ADR of renting the cars, I don't know if that is supposed to be a shoot (because WWE do rent the cars) or if Cena is just being a dick... I'd be more inclined to go with dick. I mean, does Alberto have to know everything about all the cars he has? His character is a rich bastard who has so much money he just doesn't know what to do with it so he just buys the most expensive cars he can find and drives them around as a statement, the kind of "Look at what I have! This means I'm rich" kind of statement. I guess I can at least see where Cena is coming from on this point, if I knew a rich person who was just buying loads of video games but not actually playing them, just putting them on display on a shelf, just so you know, this guy has a lot of money, look at how many games he has! I'd probably get pissed off that he doesn't know anything about the games because he doesn't play them... But still, not an excuse for a championship match.
Conclusion: To me, and I'm sure to many, it just seems like Cena is bitter that he's not WWE Champion anymore and is desperate to get that title back, he has no real griple with Alberto Del Rio, his only issues are that Alberto won the title from someone else, successfully defended it clean and has a lot of cars. That is not a feud people, that is a champion being stalked by a jealous, vindictive and bitter asshole who can't cope with the fact that he isn't that important at the moment.
This is a poorly booked feud that was just thrown together because they wanted the title off of Punk for his feud with Triple H. So they stick in on ADR and who else is there to challenge for that title? Could it possibly be an up and coming face? Perhaps John Morrison, perhaps... Well... Err... Either my mind has gone blank or WWE has no up and coming faces on RAW... I would say Kofi Kingston, but, no. I'll stick with the John Morrison choice, for you see, if JoMo had been booked a little better recently, especially in his feud with R-Truth, he could have made a fine contender for the championship
But then what is Cena to do? Feud with some one else? Who? No one immedietly comes to mind, and to leave Cena off of a PPV, as much as I dislike him, would be foolish. And since it's Night of Champions, it's bad enough they already have one non title match, you can't have two! So I guess in the end, it has to be Cena vs. ADR. I just feel that the feud could have been booked better, because of right now, Cena's reasons for disliking Alberto are just stupid.
Alberto Del Rio did do a massive beat down on Cena, but Cena (no sold it obviously) and never complained about it once, perhaps if Alberto kept on destroying Cena, hell, Alberto could go to Cena's house and destroy one of his cars! That'd give Cena a reason to be pissed off!
But perhaps that's what I need to do? Just ramble. So I guess, I'll talk about the two major storylines on RAW for now.
The big story going on on RAW these days is CM Punk vs. Triple H, a story line that should be much bigger at this point of time, CM Punk should be WWE Champion, but then we'd get into Triple H challenging for the WWE Championship, which is whole different story and a whole different complaint. While I'm happy The Game isn't in the title hunt, CM Punk should be champion, but I guess the WWE pulled the right card in the end, because if Punk was still champion, who would he face? John Cena? We've done that already! Alberto Del Rio? It'd make sense since Alberto did cash in his Money in the Bank briefcase against CM Punk and would probably make for a much better match than Alberto vs. John Cena. But at the same time, Kevin Nash attacked CM Punk after his match at SummerSlam, so CM Punk wanted to deal with that.
But no! Because it's CM Punk vs. Triple H at Night of Champions (in a non title match, but that was the case for Punk last year! At least his non title match at Night of Champions this year is a little more important than his horrible squash match against Big Show last year AND this match will no doubt be the main event, but I digress.) How did we end up in this situation of it being CM Punk vs. Triple H at Night of Champions instead of CM Punk vs. Kevin Nash?
The whole thing seems like one massive work to me. I don't want to give the WWE too much credit and possibly give them credit for something that is just improvisation. To me, it doesn't seem like WWE planned all of this in advance. But they might have!
The whole story is that Nash was supposed to wrestle Punk at Night of Champions, we all know that that would not be a good match. Nash is good, I like the guy, but he's old, his knees are tired, he is just tired in general and probably can't go anymore, especially not in a main event match against CM Punk.
So was the plan the whole time to have Nash "Fired?" and for the match at Night of Champions to be Punk vs. Triple H? I think so. Because as I said, Nash can't go anymore, he can do his jackknife powerbomb, he can big boot. But no way is he able to compete at the level people would expect. Triple H is.
Where do I think this is all heading? In my personal opinion, I think shit is going to go down big time at Night of Champions, there are many possibilites. But I think the most likely one is this; Kevin Nash is not fired 'in real life', hell, it's even possible that he's not even fired as far as kayfabe is concerned. Triple H could very well swerve us all and it turns out that he and Nash were in cohoots the whole time, which would make CM Punk right the whole time. But my opinion is that Kevin Nash will return at Night of Champions, cost Triple H the match so that he has to resign as COO of the company, so that John Larunitis (The Executive Vice President of Talent Relations) can take over WWE entirely. Perhaps that was the whole plan.
I'm a firm believer and have been for several weeks now that John Larunitis is the Annonymous RAW General Manager. Why do I think this? Ever since CM Punk cut that first promo, the infamous one, you know the one. Ever since then the RAW GM has been silent! Vince had been back on screen the week after that, he was booking the matches, so no reason for the RAW GM to e-mail in, and of course, all the weeks after Vince had been relieved of his duties, the GM has still been silent. Mostly because the GM has been on screen! He's been talking to Kevin Nash, talking to Stephanie McMahon (who we haven't seen in a while) constructing this plan to take over the WWE.
But why would Larunitis talk to Stephanie McMahon? Would she screw Triple H out of power? Is Triple H in on this too? So many damn questions and so many potential answers, but I get this horrible, horrible feeling that WWE will (like they do with most big storylines) drop the ball. They'll screw up somewhere along here, I fear that they already screwed up. I mean, just take a look at this stroyline, Nash turned out to be the one who sent that text message to his own phone... Was that a ploy to try and frame Triple H? That makes sense, but why not mention that? It just seemed like they wanted to drop that part of the story line, drop Nash and get him out of there ASAP.
I'm sorry to pose the question again, but why? Why would they want Nash out ASAP? Is it because he was effecting ratings? Was it because his promo skills were not up to scratch? Was it because he's old and can't wrestle? The fact that they announced it on WWE.com with an official release statement makes me think that it's a work, they wanted to make it seem like they just wanted him gone and out of this storyline, they released the official statement on WWE.com to try and work us.
It didn't work, or at least it didn't work on me, I've heard some people saying that they truly believe Nash is gone from the company... And for a while I could see why. That was until WWE.com put up an interview with Mr. Larunitits where he talked about why he got into Kevin Nash's limo. Surely if Nash was done with this storyline they wouldn't mention that anymore.
It's a work. It's a work. It's a work. That's all I can say, which leads us to Night of Champions where Nash will make his "shocking" return... His return will not be the shock, what he does will be the shock!
Kevin Nash as far as storyline is concerned, hates both Punk and Triple H, he has reasons to screw them both. But why screw Punk? Punk has nothing to lose. Triple H has everything to lose and of course, we all know Nash's character. He's all about money, all he wants is money and John Larunitis talking over the company would certainly end up with Nash getting quite the paycheque.
And that's just me talking about one story line on RAW, let's move onto something else!
And that something else is Alberto Del Rio vs. John Cena... Now, I'll just admit right now, I'm not a Cena fan, I've never been a Cena fan. I was hating Cena before it became the cool thing to do. From the day he stepped into a WWE ring and generic pants man from OVW with his little green shorts and gimmick of "I'm a new guy, like me" thing. Him along with Randy Orton, my main gripe was how they both just appeared, how from nowhere they were just suddenly being pushed. It was so long ago I can't even remember why I selected those two to hate on, I mean, I see new people appear in WWE all the time in more recent years and I always give them a chance. Not these two.
At least Orton won me over in the end... Cena though... John Cena wasn't doing much to impress me, he had average matches and all I could think was that he was bland... Bland as hell. But then he got a new gimmick, he turned heel, he became rapper Cena. People started to really like him, despite being a heel, they liked his cocky attitude and his "raps" (more slow paced poetry). I didn't, what I saw was a chav, a nerdy (admittedly well built) white guy with his baseball cap on backwards, shorts sagging down with his ass on display, some stupid sports jersey and generally rude.
I don't like chavs and in my opinion at the time, he was a chav. But then Cena started to change, he turned face, he started to slowly lose the chav gimmick, he stopped raping and he became this guy who seemed okay. Sure he was the obvious face who stood up for all that was right and was a little too patriotic for me. But he had decent moves, decent entrance music and a good attitude.
But then he started to win. He started to win every match, every PPV was main evented by Cena, he started with the stupid coloured t-shirts, the arm bands, the merchandise. He started doing the same match over and over and over, he started to no sell, he started... Well, he started to become Hulk Hogan, "he just moved the hand away from his ear and moved it in front of his face, brother"
I started to hate Cena again at this point, not just dislike, I mean really hate him! And the fact that he is still doing this, all the way since WrestleMania 21 all the way till now isn't helping me like him more, it's not helping anyone like him more. In fact, I'd say more people boo him now than ever before.
But now you know that I hate Cena and why I hate Cena. I'm glad I at least got that off my chest, now I'm going to talk about this feud with Alberto Del Rio.
Let's look at the key points in this feud.
Point Number One: Alberto Del Rio cashed in Money In The Bank:
Alberto Del Rio cashed in his MITB contract against CM Punk as we discussed earlier. Why does Cena have a problem with this? It's none of Cena's business, if anyone should have a gripe, it should be Punk. But he doesn't! He's already said that he accepts what happened because he did it twice before! Why does Cena get so pissed off about this? So much so that he HATES Alberto Del Rio, Cena goes mental at Alberto, he acts like Alberto killed his favorite cat! Cena has no gripe here what so ever.
Point Number Two: Albert Del Rio is a coward and has not defended his title
The first RAW after SummerSlam,Alberto Del Rio had to defend his championship against long time rival Rey Mysterio... Not only was Alberto Del Rio successful in his defence but he also beat Mysterio CLEAN! Something very rare for a heel to do, especially against some one like Mysterio. So Cena comes running out to the ring after that match to chase Alberto (and a little white mouse) away, Cena grabs a mic and says "You can't keep running forever! One day a time will come when you'll have to defend that title!" Err, hello? He just defended it cleanly not 2 minutes ago Cena! What is your problem?
Point Number Three: Alberto Del Rio doesn't know much about cars yet has many.
This is the most redicules one of them all! John Cena is a fan of cars, this much I know, I've seen that episode of Cribs where they go to John Cena's house, he's got about 10 cars, all of them are flashy sports cars. Cena's problem with Alberto Del Rio is that while ADR has many cars, he doesn't know much about them, except how to drive them. John Cena also accuses ADR of renting the cars, I don't know if that is supposed to be a shoot (because WWE do rent the cars) or if Cena is just being a dick... I'd be more inclined to go with dick. I mean, does Alberto have to know everything about all the cars he has? His character is a rich bastard who has so much money he just doesn't know what to do with it so he just buys the most expensive cars he can find and drives them around as a statement, the kind of "Look at what I have! This means I'm rich" kind of statement. I guess I can at least see where Cena is coming from on this point, if I knew a rich person who was just buying loads of video games but not actually playing them, just putting them on display on a shelf, just so you know, this guy has a lot of money, look at how many games he has! I'd probably get pissed off that he doesn't know anything about the games because he doesn't play them... But still, not an excuse for a championship match.
Conclusion: To me, and I'm sure to many, it just seems like Cena is bitter that he's not WWE Champion anymore and is desperate to get that title back, he has no real griple with Alberto Del Rio, his only issues are that Alberto won the title from someone else, successfully defended it clean and has a lot of cars. That is not a feud people, that is a champion being stalked by a jealous, vindictive and bitter asshole who can't cope with the fact that he isn't that important at the moment.
This is a poorly booked feud that was just thrown together because they wanted the title off of Punk for his feud with Triple H. So they stick in on ADR and who else is there to challenge for that title? Could it possibly be an up and coming face? Perhaps John Morrison, perhaps... Well... Err... Either my mind has gone blank or WWE has no up and coming faces on RAW... I would say Kofi Kingston, but, no. I'll stick with the John Morrison choice, for you see, if JoMo had been booked a little better recently, especially in his feud with R-Truth, he could have made a fine contender for the championship
But then what is Cena to do? Feud with some one else? Who? No one immedietly comes to mind, and to leave Cena off of a PPV, as much as I dislike him, would be foolish. And since it's Night of Champions, it's bad enough they already have one non title match, you can't have two! So I guess in the end, it has to be Cena vs. ADR. I just feel that the feud could have been booked better, because of right now, Cena's reasons for disliking Alberto are just stupid.
Alberto Del Rio did do a massive beat down on Cena, but Cena (no sold it obviously) and never complained about it once, perhaps if Alberto kept on destroying Cena, hell, Alberto could go to Cena's house and destroy one of his cars! That'd give Cena a reason to be pissed off!
I'm pretty sure the car thing is a joke about the cars being rented when ADR is rich, and ADR not knowing anything about them is an add-on to the joke rather than the joke itself.
All-in-all you know how I feel about Cena and Cena haters, you really need to calm yo'self down. His technical ability is incredibly limited, but he's great on the mic, kids and mums love him, and he's probably a pretty nice guy. Don't hate the player, hate the game ;P
And as for my hate for Cena, I'm not hating the man, the person, John Cena. I'm hating the booking of the character John Cena. Although, I got no excuse for his WM27 match against Miz, just dunno what was up with him that night, to me, it looked like he was butt hurt he wasn't winning the match so went out of his way to put on the crappiest match possible... I dunno x.x
And I'm pretty sure you do hate the man John Cena and not just the booking of the character John Cena, with some of the things you've said to me before :P I reckon Cena's butt-hurt from Mania though, if any, was probably The Rock being the centre of the main event and not the fact that he had a match with Miz. Still, no excuse for that sub-par match, I agree.