FA+
Shop
summing up 2011
13 years ago
tldr; I haven't accomplished dick.
1. What did you do in 2011 that you'd never done before?
Bought real furniture, almost OD'd on cocaine, and had an affair. Interesting year.
2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Never have made any, but I might start this year.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Fucking yes, everyone around me has the babbytumor. So ghey.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Not close-close, no.
5. What countries did you visit?
None. I've barely left this state all year.
6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Medical/dental insurance. lol
7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
April 27th. I'd rather not say why, but it was the most horrific day of my life so far. Worse than September 24th, 2010, and I didn't think anything could top that shit.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Overcoming my relationship issues, owning a house, and this promotion!
9. What was your biggest failure?
Becoming a true addict.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
The door at work almost severed my hamstring back in early September. The scar is lumpy as fuck.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
Either the sectional couch or the tentacle sticker for my car.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Honestly? Mine. I've been forced to grow the fuck up this year. It's been Billy & Sam vs. The World all year long, and we're much better people for it. I feel good about myself. :D
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Our ex-roommates'. A fat whore who did nothing but eat chocolate and ooze onto our couch all day, then by night fuck anyone who wasn't her abusive, alcoholic, chronically masturbating exhibitionist husband. I hate white people.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Up my nose.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Vagabond Swing / 20K show at AMB, I guess. Not very exciting lol
16. What song will always remind you of 2011?
Modest Mouse - "The Good Times are Killing Me"
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
b) thinner or fatter?
c) richer or poorer?
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Coke.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Coke.
20. How did you/will you spend Christmas?
At my Gammy's with my family, then tomorrow we'll be hosting it at our house for Billy's family. Ohgosh.
21. Did you fall in love in 2011?
No, but my current affections did wax and wane. We're okay now.
22. What was your favorite TV program?
Venture Bros., same as always.
23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Haha, yeah. Monte is a hipster douchebag.
24. What was the best book you read?
Slaughterhouse-Five.
25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Vagabond Swing AND 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. (I went to school with Cpt. Nemo!)
26. What did you want and get?
Bandit! :D (our stolen cat)
27. What did you want and not get?
Vengeance. Closure. A corgi.
28. What was your favorite film of this year?
Kung Fu Panda 2.
29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Got food poisoning from Chili's, I was turning (and still am) 20.
30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Nothing special. Just a certain fat, bald, diseased, pedophilic, limpdicked Nazi babyfur rapist's blood on my hands, clothes, and switchblade.
31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
I went from my classic tomboy to a more "I'm in my early 20s" look. I'm fly.
32. What kept you sane?
Drugs. And Billy, I guess.
33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None of them. Well, I guess meeting Jack Black would be cool. And fucking Lucy Liu would be awesome too.
34. What political issue stirred you the most?
Prop 27 in MS: Redefining personhood. All abortions/birth control would have become illegal. Mad props to Mississippians for Healthy Families for stomping out that short-lived fire!
35. Who did you miss?
My dad. Had many recurring dreams of his sudden demise while out on the water. The thought still makes me tear up. (he's fine though, just fat lol)
36. Who was the best new person you met?
I think Doug popped into my life in January. His personality switches from a fatboy thug dragging around 55lb barrels of kush, to a devoted husband and devout Christian. He is hilarious, and I couldn't be learning leadership from anyone better qualified to teach. The dude died for seven minutes on the table. He's been through hell and back, quite literally. My favorite coworker is a zombie/Christian/thug! lmao
37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.
Don't do cocaine and have sex with hipsters? No, that's not it... close, though.
38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"I can be that // but soon you'll see that // I will never do anything" - Barenaked Ladies
1. What did you do in 2011 that you'd never done before?
Bought real furniture, almost OD'd on cocaine, and had an affair. Interesting year.
2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Never have made any, but I might start this year.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Fucking yes, everyone around me has the babbytumor. So ghey.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Not close-close, no.
5. What countries did you visit?
None. I've barely left this state all year.
6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Medical/dental insurance. lol
7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
April 27th. I'd rather not say why, but it was the most horrific day of my life so far. Worse than September 24th, 2010, and I didn't think anything could top that shit.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Overcoming my relationship issues, owning a house, and this promotion!
9. What was your biggest failure?
Becoming a true addict.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
The door at work almost severed my hamstring back in early September. The scar is lumpy as fuck.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
Either the sectional couch or the tentacle sticker for my car.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Honestly? Mine. I've been forced to grow the fuck up this year. It's been Billy & Sam vs. The World all year long, and we're much better people for it. I feel good about myself. :D
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Our ex-roommates'. A fat whore who did nothing but eat chocolate and ooze onto our couch all day, then by night fuck anyone who wasn't her abusive, alcoholic, chronically masturbating exhibitionist husband. I hate white people.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Up my nose.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Vagabond Swing / 20K show at AMB, I guess. Not very exciting lol
16. What song will always remind you of 2011?
Modest Mouse - "The Good Times are Killing Me"
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
b) thinner or fatter?
c) richer or poorer?
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Coke.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Coke.
20. How did you/will you spend Christmas?
At my Gammy's with my family, then tomorrow we'll be hosting it at our house for Billy's family. Ohgosh.
21. Did you fall in love in 2011?
No, but my current affections did wax and wane. We're okay now.
22. What was your favorite TV program?
Venture Bros., same as always.
23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Haha, yeah. Monte is a hipster douchebag.
24. What was the best book you read?
Slaughterhouse-Five.
25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Vagabond Swing AND 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. (I went to school with Cpt. Nemo!)
26. What did you want and get?
Bandit! :D (our stolen cat)
27. What did you want and not get?
Vengeance. Closure. A corgi.
28. What was your favorite film of this year?
Kung Fu Panda 2.
29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Got food poisoning from Chili's, I was turning (and still am) 20.
30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Nothing special. Just a certain fat, bald, diseased, pedophilic, limpdicked Nazi babyfur rapist's blood on my hands, clothes, and switchblade.
31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
I went from my classic tomboy to a more "I'm in my early 20s" look. I'm fly.
32. What kept you sane?
Drugs. And Billy, I guess.
33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None of them. Well, I guess meeting Jack Black would be cool. And fucking Lucy Liu would be awesome too.
34. What political issue stirred you the most?
Prop 27 in MS: Redefining personhood. All abortions/birth control would have become illegal. Mad props to Mississippians for Healthy Families for stomping out that short-lived fire!
35. Who did you miss?
My dad. Had many recurring dreams of his sudden demise while out on the water. The thought still makes me tear up. (he's fine though, just fat lol)
36. Who was the best new person you met?
I think Doug popped into my life in January. His personality switches from a fatboy thug dragging around 55lb barrels of kush, to a devoted husband and devout Christian. He is hilarious, and I couldn't be learning leadership from anyone better qualified to teach. The dude died for seven minutes on the table. He's been through hell and back, quite literally. My favorite coworker is a zombie/Christian/thug! lmao
37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.
Don't do cocaine and have sex with hipsters? No, that's not it... close, though.
38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"I can be that // but soon you'll see that // I will never do anything" - Barenaked Ladies
So no worries, I'm clean and healthy now! *hugs back*
Nice crack joke, though, but you should know a girl of my tastes wouldn't settle for anything but purity. I thought you knew the skinny look hasn't ever worked for you. That garbage bag of skin hanging to your knees isn't too terribly attractive.
No, I haven't seen you lately. Sorry my stalking skills aren't quite as honed as yours. What kind of creep reads his long-gone ex's murrpurr journals anyway?
At least you aren't still calling me six times a day anymore, leaving whiny voicemails about how ronery you are without the snatch you had begged me to allow you to bury your face in so many times before. Until you decided to just take it, that is.
According to my rather reliable sources, you're generous enough to share your flaccid excuse for a phallus with anyone willing to pretend the top of your head doesn't remind them of their grandfather! And here you are trying to make me think I'm special, tsk tsk.
Now, if you'd be so kind, get your nose out of my business and shove it back up your mother's fetid cunt.
Hope the door hits you on your way out, fucker.
Should've known he'd pull that.
You win this round, banalheart!
Wait, nevermind.
No you don't.