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On "Holidays" ~Let the madness begin
14 years ago
Alright, so it’s Christmas . . . oh I’m sorry. It’s the Holidays. Gotta stay politically correct here. Anyway, it’s the “time to give back” and “spread peace and joy” and all that shit. Right? Yea let’s all gather around the Christmas tree and celebrate as Billy gets a brand new Xbox 360 with kenect and 5 games, because that’s what this is all about, right?
So yes, if you haven’t guessed yet, I’m bitching about this season.
So let’s take Bob from Accounting. He’s a prick. Cuts people off in traffic, spits on homeless people, and all the other prick-y things he can do. Come thanksgiving and Christmas, the “giving back season”, he decides to drop a few pennies in for the Salvation Army bell ringers. Suddenly, he’s a good guy, and everything he’s done wrong is suddenly forgiven, right? Sorry, where the FUCK did that come from? When did it become acceptable that you only have to be nice during the “holiday season”? So you can be a complete dick most of the year, but this season is special so everyone has to be nice so they can be assholes the rest of the year? How the fuck does that work?
Why do you need to set aside a special day or special month to be nice? Is it really THAT hard to not be a complete fuckhole ALL YEAR LONG? Must be, otherwise the Salvation Army and other charity drive things would be around all year. No, we have to have special times to do them, otherwise it’s ordinary and no one would give a fuck, I guess. If they were ringing the bells all year long, people might actually have to realize that problems exist for more than a short amount of time. And such a thing could never be allowed to happen.
Next point. When the FUCK did Christmas get to the point where it’s all about guilting people into buying expensive items they really don’t need? I mean, don’t get me wrong. I like getting stuff. I think everyone does. But it’s like it’s MANDATORY to do it during this season, otherwise you’re a dick. You HAVE to go get Jimmy that $400 tablet despite him being a stuck up shit all year. Why? Well, it’s the HOLIDAYS! Everyone has to get into the spirit of GIVING! Even if it is pointless and undeserved. Is it a reward for something? Hey, you lived a year, have a present you’ll prolly lose, return, or break within the next three months!
Moving on. Christmas wasn’t always about the commercialized guilt-trip. It used to be about family. Being with people. Appreciating that you have family and friends. On that point, why do we have to appreciate them once a year? Shouldn’t you always appreciate your family and friends who support you and help and stuff? Or is that not allowed because it has to be special? But even before that, and here’s what people don’t know, Christmas was a Solstice celebration for pagan religions called Yule (for the most part). And it wasn’t about giving gifts. It was about the sun being reborn and a new year beginning. A new cycle. It was the longest night of the year, and people celebrated that as a sense of balance. The longest day of the year and the longest night. A balance between night and day, a balance of nature. That the world is continuing on. But wait, what does that sound like . . .? I dunno, maybe the Christians who came in MUCH later and were like “no this dude named Jesus was born this day, not the sun, so come worship US instead!” and then proceeded to try and stamp out every other religion in existence (lot of good that did, I worship DRAGONS!) So even there, Christmas has lost its meaning.
And then, on a related note (not really but still), why is it people seem to catch stupid this time of year? They drive through parking lots at 30+ mph, ignore everyone else and fight over parking places. In the stores “Happy holidays! Merry Christmas!” but in the lot it’s “get the fuck out of my way!” Love the double standard there. And yes, I should know. I work in a fucking parking lot. People drive like idiots normally, and it just gets worse now. Oh, but they put a few pennies in for the Salvation Army, or gave a can of .70 cent green beans to a food drive, so all is forgiven for another year, I guess.
In short: people are morons (when HASN’T that been the “in short”?), holidays are being corrupted by commercialized guilt (oh yes, it’s the holidays, go buy mr so-and-so a BRAND NEW CAR for no reason), and people need to stop driving. Forever.
So yes, if you haven’t guessed yet, I’m bitching about this season.
So let’s take Bob from Accounting. He’s a prick. Cuts people off in traffic, spits on homeless people, and all the other prick-y things he can do. Come thanksgiving and Christmas, the “giving back season”, he decides to drop a few pennies in for the Salvation Army bell ringers. Suddenly, he’s a good guy, and everything he’s done wrong is suddenly forgiven, right? Sorry, where the FUCK did that come from? When did it become acceptable that you only have to be nice during the “holiday season”? So you can be a complete dick most of the year, but this season is special so everyone has to be nice so they can be assholes the rest of the year? How the fuck does that work?
Why do you need to set aside a special day or special month to be nice? Is it really THAT hard to not be a complete fuckhole ALL YEAR LONG? Must be, otherwise the Salvation Army and other charity drive things would be around all year. No, we have to have special times to do them, otherwise it’s ordinary and no one would give a fuck, I guess. If they were ringing the bells all year long, people might actually have to realize that problems exist for more than a short amount of time. And such a thing could never be allowed to happen.
Next point. When the FUCK did Christmas get to the point where it’s all about guilting people into buying expensive items they really don’t need? I mean, don’t get me wrong. I like getting stuff. I think everyone does. But it’s like it’s MANDATORY to do it during this season, otherwise you’re a dick. You HAVE to go get Jimmy that $400 tablet despite him being a stuck up shit all year. Why? Well, it’s the HOLIDAYS! Everyone has to get into the spirit of GIVING! Even if it is pointless and undeserved. Is it a reward for something? Hey, you lived a year, have a present you’ll prolly lose, return, or break within the next three months!
Moving on. Christmas wasn’t always about the commercialized guilt-trip. It used to be about family. Being with people. Appreciating that you have family and friends. On that point, why do we have to appreciate them once a year? Shouldn’t you always appreciate your family and friends who support you and help and stuff? Or is that not allowed because it has to be special? But even before that, and here’s what people don’t know, Christmas was a Solstice celebration for pagan religions called Yule (for the most part). And it wasn’t about giving gifts. It was about the sun being reborn and a new year beginning. A new cycle. It was the longest night of the year, and people celebrated that as a sense of balance. The longest day of the year and the longest night. A balance between night and day, a balance of nature. That the world is continuing on. But wait, what does that sound like . . .? I dunno, maybe the Christians who came in MUCH later and were like “no this dude named Jesus was born this day, not the sun, so come worship US instead!” and then proceeded to try and stamp out every other religion in existence (lot of good that did, I worship DRAGONS!) So even there, Christmas has lost its meaning.
And then, on a related note (not really but still), why is it people seem to catch stupid this time of year? They drive through parking lots at 30+ mph, ignore everyone else and fight over parking places. In the stores “Happy holidays! Merry Christmas!” but in the lot it’s “get the fuck out of my way!” Love the double standard there. And yes, I should know. I work in a fucking parking lot. People drive like idiots normally, and it just gets worse now. Oh, but they put a few pennies in for the Salvation Army, or gave a can of .70 cent green beans to a food drive, so all is forgiven for another year, I guess.
In short: people are morons (when HASN’T that been the “in short”?), holidays are being corrupted by commercialized guilt (oh yes, it’s the holidays, go buy mr so-and-so a BRAND NEW CAR for no reason), and people need to stop driving. Forever.
