I was coming home from my aunt and uncle's house, we were joking around, shooting the shit, just driving down the road. It'd been raining and snowing earlier that day (thank you, canada) so that might have worsened conditions. I might have been distracting my uncle. There are a whole lot of "might have" situations. Whatever it was that lead up to it, we ended up running a stop sign, and the car was hit. We were sent spinning until we crashed into a fire hydrant on someone's lawn (which, miraculously, was dead.) The only sound I remember upon impact was the dog in the back seat of our car yelping, and my aunt saying my uncle's name followed by "No, no, no, no, no, no!"

And then I remember soundless spinning. And shattered glass. I think I say stars for a moment or two when we finally came to a hault. The dog was yipping and crying and barking.

I remember trying to crawl out of the car, pushing the door open, taking off my seat belt and saying "ooookay everyone out." But then my aunt, frantically and in a frightened manner, told me no. that i needed to lay down and not move. So I flopped back in my seat, my head on my bag. In what seemed like seconds, people from the neighborhood were upon us - one of them even had first aid training. Her name was Caroline. For a brief instant, I thought of Portal 2. She was holding my uncle's head straight forward, and from my laying down position i could see my aunt holding his hand. We all spoke very calmly, answered any questions they asked. A few other people showed up with blankets and pillows after Caroline confirmed that I shouldn't be moving. One of the girls who was helping to calm down the dog was going to have her birthday this coming Saturday. I told her happy birthday, I don't know that she heard me.

When the paramedics arrived they spoke very gently to me and, after some questions, lifted my onto a stretcher and took me into the back of an ambulance. I remember looking up at the clouds while they were moving me and still having my ever constant migraine aura and thinking "well, shit. that's still there." When we got into the back of the ambulance the paramedic with me started asking me questions about myself and tried to get my pulse with a machine that clipped onto my finger. he couldn't get it to work on either finger, it registered me as being dead. I didn't know that's what the machine did, so I wasn't all too concerned by it at the time. He then told me that he couldn't fine a pulse, when I was quite clearly alive. So either the machine was faulty, or I defied all medical laws he knew. The first thing that came to mind was "tell him you're a lich." but then I figured he wouldn't get that. so instead I looked to him and said:

"Shh, I'm a necromancer. It is my dark, dark, secret. You cannot tell anyone."

To this, he laughed. He kept me talking, humored my humor. Apparently I'm funny when I'm on an adrenaline rush - maybe I should get into more car crashes and just become a stand up comedian. Shortly after I told him I was a necromancer, my mother called me. I made sure she had the dog and, after some confusion, she did have her all safe and sound. My aunt was riding up with the driver of the ambulance this entire time. Both the paramedics did a good job of making me feel safe and sound.

After the ride to the hospital I had a nine and a half hour wait to see a doctor. six hours outside of an actual room, three and a half inside. (Once again, thank you canada.) After all that time, i took the doctor ten minutes to poke at me and say that I had some abrasions but I'd be fine otherwise. Nine hours of waiting. You know why? There was one doctor staffed. And 17 nurses that could do little other than say "We'll need a urine sample, please" and hand out assless gowns. One doctor.

Now, I appreciate the canadian healthcare system in that it is free - you are processed based on the seriousness of your condition not on how much money you have. Your bank account won't be drained if you're in a situation like mine. That's beautiful, that's wonderful. But.... 17 nurses? Really? if you had, oh, I don't know, maybe 10 nurses but TWO doctors, maybe people wouldn't have to wait Nine hours to be seen. I know that it's not the fault of the people on the floor - they're doing the best with what they have. The people who are scheduling this, who hired too many nurses and not enough doctors... those are the guys who irk me.

Anyways, I'm okay. My aunt and uncle are okay. The dog is okay. The other driver is okay. His passengers are okay.

It's all okay.