FA+
Shop
Ultimate Shitcake
13 years ago
Yes it's one of THOSE. Fuckin' A - as I believe the correct response goes...
1. We all know what we call you, what about the folks at home? Whats your name?
Him. (as in "did you see HIM." and "I cleaved HIM in half with a curtain rail when he tried to eat my brains last night".)
2. How tall are you?
5' 9, and yes they do stack shit that high.
3. Natural hair color? (if you can remember it)
Ultramarine
3. What about eye color?
Octarine
4. What orientation are you?
Judging from the sun I'd say roughly north east, level with the horizon.
5. Are you single, taken, or undecided?
singularly untaken.
6. What do you do in your spare time?
Kick ass, and periodically chew bubble gum.
7. What's your job?
I give boob jobs to hobos; they can't afford them so somebody has to boost their self esteem.
8. What's one thing you like about yourself?
My ego; so beautiful it is I have just commissioned a solid gold statue of myself the urinates champagne and shits diamonds.
9. Alright, now what about something you dislike about yourself?
The stains your mom left on my chest.
10. What's some things your friends noticed about you when they first met you?
The angry mob chasing after me with pitchforks and burning torches.
11. Of what faith/religion are you(if any at all?)
The one that figured out how to think for itself.
12. Do you drink?
No. I am sitting here a pile of dust, unquenched since the day I was born.
13. Do you smoke?
I smoke bananas. And only the comedy ones that explode in your face instead of behaving like a real cigar.
14. What are your fears?
That a furry will somehow make it into a position of responsibility.
15. What are your dreams/goals?
To close the vortex, kill the Emperor, destroy the ring, rescue the Princess and look good doing it.
16 .Ever had any crushes/ex's in the past/present?
Yes I fell into an industrial garbage compactor.
17. Who's your best bud?
Definitely not Bud Light - this horseshit American beer can fuck off and die; more so than it tastes like the thing they used to brew it with did.
18. Alright, you got the cravin' for munchies, what'cha reachin' for?
A dictionary to stuff it up your ass until you absorb the correct terminology from it.
19. Favorite drink?
Blue milk.
20. Favorite color?
Apple brown
21. If you had any super power, what would it be?
The power to know when to shut the fuck up.
22. Favorite movie?
Super hot sorority III
23. Least favorite food?
Soggy biscuit
24. Quick! You have only one meal left before you die!!! What is it?
I would eat a bag of fireworks and fuck the shit up out of the coroner when they did a post-mortem
25. What do you drive/wish you drove?
I drove your mom all night, but she smelt like a taxi cab inside and I had to keep pulling her over to kick her in the tyres.
26. Most disliked bug?
Ebola
27. Most hated pet peeves?
Wanky chain letter things like this.
28. Dislike in life?
Death
29. Most annoying?
Surely myself?
30. Most disliked TV show?
Anything that begins or ends with a "Salute for Heroes"
1. We all know what we call you, what about the folks at home? Whats your name?
Him. (as in "did you see HIM." and "I cleaved HIM in half with a curtain rail when he tried to eat my brains last night".)
2. How tall are you?
5' 9, and yes they do stack shit that high.
3. Natural hair color? (if you can remember it)
Ultramarine
3. What about eye color?
Octarine
4. What orientation are you?
Judging from the sun I'd say roughly north east, level with the horizon.
5. Are you single, taken, or undecided?
singularly untaken.
6. What do you do in your spare time?
Kick ass, and periodically chew bubble gum.
7. What's your job?
I give boob jobs to hobos; they can't afford them so somebody has to boost their self esteem.
8. What's one thing you like about yourself?
My ego; so beautiful it is I have just commissioned a solid gold statue of myself the urinates champagne and shits diamonds.
9. Alright, now what about something you dislike about yourself?
The stains your mom left on my chest.
10. What's some things your friends noticed about you when they first met you?
The angry mob chasing after me with pitchforks and burning torches.
11. Of what faith/religion are you(if any at all?)
The one that figured out how to think for itself.
12. Do you drink?
No. I am sitting here a pile of dust, unquenched since the day I was born.
13. Do you smoke?
I smoke bananas. And only the comedy ones that explode in your face instead of behaving like a real cigar.
14. What are your fears?
That a furry will somehow make it into a position of responsibility.
15. What are your dreams/goals?
To close the vortex, kill the Emperor, destroy the ring, rescue the Princess and look good doing it.
16 .Ever had any crushes/ex's in the past/present?
Yes I fell into an industrial garbage compactor.
17. Who's your best bud?
Definitely not Bud Light - this horseshit American beer can fuck off and die; more so than it tastes like the thing they used to brew it with did.
18. Alright, you got the cravin' for munchies, what'cha reachin' for?
A dictionary to stuff it up your ass until you absorb the correct terminology from it.
19. Favorite drink?
Blue milk.
20. Favorite color?
Apple brown
21. If you had any super power, what would it be?
The power to know when to shut the fuck up.
22. Favorite movie?
Super hot sorority III
23. Least favorite food?
Soggy biscuit
24. Quick! You have only one meal left before you die!!! What is it?
I would eat a bag of fireworks and fuck the shit up out of the coroner when they did a post-mortem
25. What do you drive/wish you drove?
I drove your mom all night, but she smelt like a taxi cab inside and I had to keep pulling her over to kick her in the tyres.
26. Most disliked bug?
Ebola
27. Most hated pet peeves?
Wanky chain letter things like this.
28. Dislike in life?
Death
29. Most annoying?
Surely myself?
30. Most disliked TV show?
Anything that begins or ends with a "Salute for Heroes"
