I find myself recently in an interesting state. For the most part I spend my nights working on something, some project, be it art or a game or even just painting miniatures, recently I've been feeling like theres nothing significant to work on. I've got zero commissions at this moment and only one trade (thats turning into a tricky one to draw) and Im in an escalation league with a new army (warhammer Tzneetch army) but I cant seem to find the motivation to work on it.

A few days ago I got an email from work telling me that it was my third year with working with the company and I think it caused something in my brain to snap. I love my job (Im a web developer) and where I work affords me some awesome benefits and great pay but getting that email reminded me that unless I get laid off this will probably be the job I retire from, sans zombies or end of the world. Now theres nothing wrong with that but it just feel like I need to do something more with myself all of a sudden. But what?

I have dozens of ideas of things I would like to do, all of them making some final product for people (and none of them are too outlandish such as an anime or xbox game), I want to make something others will enjoy, but something physical. I enjoy digital work but making a physical product people get joy out of makes me smile. I envy the guys at bad dragon, interesting thing to envy I know, but people love their products and have a great time with them, something like that is worth the time and effort and pain to produce. The problem I run into is lack of skills to produce my ideas or lack of talent.

So for now Im just kind of lost. Im toying around with the idea or learning 3d modeling, not for animation but to make resin kits, maybe design my own miniatures or something, but in all honesty I wish I just knew a really fast and super talented modeler whom I could afford.

Just my rambling, back to drawing pegging.

Oh such a plight to envy the men who can cure hysteria with their designs