FA+
Shop
Midwest Fur Fest Con report- Late again.
12 years ago
Yeah, I'm months late on my con report again. You'll just have to deal with it, because Drama Llamas are always so busy keeping up with our (nonexistent) social life, spending time with our (imaginary) friends and begging for handouts on Second Life (which is nearly as glum and depressing as Real Life) that it is very, very DIFFICULT to find time to PROPERLY EXPRESS OUR ANGST.
That being said, let me just sum up Midwest Fur Fest in two words or less:
worst.
con.
NEVER.
That's right. Never. *sigh* I had packed my bags in great anticipation of actually maybe having a tiny bit of fun for once as this time I had a free airline ticket on United (ominous music here) and so my cost to attend was actually within my miniscule budget. Well, I should have chosen any other airline (or simply walked, for that matter), as that was the weekend United's reservations computers all went crazy (running Windows Vista?) and left me stuck in an airport for two days. Which wouldn't have been that bad, except the airport happened to be in Libya. I wondered why the flight took so darn long!
So, there I am, stuck in a foreign airport in a country that just happened to be in the middle of a civil war and I'm thinking to myself "What a great place to experience drama!" except I couldn't leave the airport 'cuz I didn't have a visa! Kind of like that guy who lived in Charles Degaulle airport in France for almost his whole life as he didn't have any papers. Only, he became famous and got free food and a place to stay while I had to eat at the airport McDonalds three meals a day three days in a row as they were the only place that took US debit cards. I will never lose this weight I gained! *whines*.
So, I'm stuck in Libya for four days, and the officials finally let me get on a flight back to the good old, reasonably democratic Uterus of A. Oh, I was so grateful to go home I was crying so hard and I had to blow my nose on my one remaining clean pair of underwear! Good thing I packed a pair!
Only, being a Drama Llama there was of course a complication or two-. They wouldn't let me back in the country 'cuz I didnt have my vaccination record with me. And then....they accused me of being a foreign agent and saboteur from Chile! Only thing is, I'm a domestically-raised Drama Llama so I didn't have Chilean papers, which they kept insisting on seeing and since I had never traveled internationally, I didn't have a passport to prove I was an American citizen!
So, they waterboarded me for a few hours until they were convinced I wasn't much of a threat to national security, and then grudgingly let me board my flight to Chicago. Which got me in at 3:00 Sunday, and by the time I got the shuttle to the con I had just missed Closing Ceremonies! The nerve of those guys!
THEY DIDN'T EVEN POSTPONE THE CON UNTIL I GOT THERE! NOBODY WAITED FOR ME!
That's the least they could have done, was wait for *me*. No con is complete without me!!!!!
But, at least I got to complain about it to everyone as they were walking out of the ballroom doors.
The Fire Alarm going off at 3:00 AM wasn't bad either- lots of DRAMA as sleepy furries were forced out in the parking lot in various states of intoxication and undress.
All for nothing.
That being said, let me just sum up Midwest Fur Fest in two words or less:
worst.
con.
NEVER.
That's right. Never. *sigh* I had packed my bags in great anticipation of actually maybe having a tiny bit of fun for once as this time I had a free airline ticket on United (ominous music here) and so my cost to attend was actually within my miniscule budget. Well, I should have chosen any other airline (or simply walked, for that matter), as that was the weekend United's reservations computers all went crazy (running Windows Vista?) and left me stuck in an airport for two days. Which wouldn't have been that bad, except the airport happened to be in Libya. I wondered why the flight took so darn long!
So, there I am, stuck in a foreign airport in a country that just happened to be in the middle of a civil war and I'm thinking to myself "What a great place to experience drama!" except I couldn't leave the airport 'cuz I didn't have a visa! Kind of like that guy who lived in Charles Degaulle airport in France for almost his whole life as he didn't have any papers. Only, he became famous and got free food and a place to stay while I had to eat at the airport McDonalds three meals a day three days in a row as they were the only place that took US debit cards. I will never lose this weight I gained! *whines*.
So, I'm stuck in Libya for four days, and the officials finally let me get on a flight back to the good old, reasonably democratic Uterus of A. Oh, I was so grateful to go home I was crying so hard and I had to blow my nose on my one remaining clean pair of underwear! Good thing I packed a pair!
Only, being a Drama Llama there was of course a complication or two-. They wouldn't let me back in the country 'cuz I didnt have my vaccination record with me. And then....they accused me of being a foreign agent and saboteur from Chile! Only thing is, I'm a domestically-raised Drama Llama so I didn't have Chilean papers, which they kept insisting on seeing and since I had never traveled internationally, I didn't have a passport to prove I was an American citizen!
So, they waterboarded me for a few hours until they were convinced I wasn't much of a threat to national security, and then grudgingly let me board my flight to Chicago. Which got me in at 3:00 Sunday, and by the time I got the shuttle to the con I had just missed Closing Ceremonies! The nerve of those guys!
THEY DIDN'T EVEN POSTPONE THE CON UNTIL I GOT THERE! NOBODY WAITED FOR ME!
That's the least they could have done, was wait for *me*. No con is complete without me!!!!!
But, at least I got to complain about it to everyone as they were walking out of the ballroom doors.
The Fire Alarm going off at 3:00 AM wasn't bad either- lots of DRAMA as sleepy furries were forced out in the parking lot in various states of intoxication and undress.
All for nothing.
I guess you could say.. if not for us furries.. you wouldn't exist.
...I honestly don't know what to say to that... sorry.
*douses himself in Bactine*
*bathes in Listerine*
1) I don't smoke and
2) I don't have any real friends.