One of my uncles died on the 20th. My mom left today (day after her birthday) to spend time with her family before they bury him. This isn't the first time this has happened as I have grown up, family deaths in the midst of joyous occasions.

I've been raised very distant from my extended family and have never felt all that close to them. Its typically several months before I find myself sad about it. Today I find myself distraught not at his death, but at not being able to share in my mother's grief.

This is also a strange time for me as mine and my mother's birthdays are so close together. I am now turning 30 in only eight more days, and while I have long been against elaborate birthday celebrations the idea that she might not be back in time for my birthday is... annoying(?).

I don't know.