I'm not as depressed or stressed anymore. But I might not be talkative still for a bit. Might try to come back to Skype or IM's or something in the future.

Apologies if I worried anyone. I really can't explain rationally what caused me to be so depressed this week (other than news of an old prick boss possibly returning, hours still crap, money problems now and for the future, indecisiveness on what the fuck I want to do for my life other than Office Supplies and Copy making, hearing my sister and her boyfriend and daughter got "evicted" from their house *by evicted I mean the real owner of the house sold the house to someone else under my sister's nose and are forcing them out in a few weeks without discussing this*, stomach problems that were a bitch to go away, and generally just hating myself for being distant from friends and family and being such a fucking lazy ass and not gathering any inspiration/energy/motivation/etc to work on drawings or stories or editing my gamestreams for public viewing later).

...ok, so maybe I could kind of rationalize my depressive reasons >___>

Sometimes I just feel like there is no real reason to do anything or care when I haven't amounted to anything or something. I feel so distant from my family and some of my friends, and a lot of that is my fault. I'm an indoor cat/a shut-in or loner. I put too much value on my personal time all these years and I'm beginning to see the consequence of it getting older. How am I going to prepare myself for when the friends I have go away and have their own lives to live? Or when my niece gets older and wants to hang with her quiet and timid loner uncle who does love her but has no clue how to handle helping raise and take care of a kid? What will I do when my parent's become too old that they'll need care? When they one day pass away?

I'm gonna have to deal with these one day and I need to learn to grow out of my loner funk and...

*sigh* I really don't know how to end this.

I need to make changes, and I need to really consider what changes need to be made.

But for now...I think the best course of action I can make is to wake myself out of my depressive state and get back to life as it is. Finish my stories and drawings and finally move on to new ones. Get my resume in check and start look into new work opportunities. Stop buying crap and saving. Clean out my junk and sell or recycle. Spend more time with my folks and my friends. Just....stop waiting to die and start living.