Always the elephant in the room, the subject of why I haven't posted in well over a year looms heavily on anything I might say.

But hey. Fuck it.

I suppose it merits inclusion that I've had kind of a major league breakdown in the interval between then and now. And then came back from it. Another handy aspect of this medium, I suppose.

I was crippled under the weight of my anxiety, depression, and long-unaddressed mental health issues. I harbored a deep and corrosive discomfort for my own desires that steeped, and further retarded my sexuality and skewed my emotional responses.

Things are better now. Nothing happens overnight. I suspect misfits like myself (and maybe you, dear reader) tend to straighten themselves out more often than we might think. It's still a constant battle when you suffer from mental illness. We all have our demons. I have something of a firm grip on the tail of mine, with no intention of letting it go.

I sought counselling. I put myself out there. I met someone. I found decent employment.

Now I own a home, and I'm sowing plans for a real future. If I leave this experience with any prevailing message, it's that anyone can do this, no matter how far down the wrong road they may be. (Pardon for borrowing the Turkish proverb)


The question remains of what to do with this medium? It would make an ideal home for the racier pursuits of one with my particular proclivities. And it likely will, since, even my partner acknowledges, that sort of thing needs its place in the universe.

I'd like to go into more detail, albeit gradually, about my experiences. In doing so I will undoubtedly endorse the use of professional mental health services to some degree; fair warning is given.

In the meantime, I don't get much free time these days, so frequent posts may be impossible to promise. In the meantime, I hope to hear from you, dear reader. You are interesting. And sexy. Seriously, that hat really works for you.


Talk to you soon!