I get a little excited before cons. And by a little, I mean I run around with my arms up in the air, screaming, "YAAAAAY!" until the neighbors call those guys with the clean white coats again.

Every year, this inevitably ends with me laying in my bed carefully studying the insides of my eyelids until two or three hours before I have to wake up.

Not this year! This time, I've mapped out a cunning strategy that will allow me to get a healthy 8 hours of sleep before having to wake up at the unnatural hour of 5:00 AM. I'm going to close my eyes and pretend really hard that tomorrow is another work day instead of the beginning of something I've been looking forward to for months. Well, I guess it doesn't sound that amazing when I say it out loud, but hey, I got to try something.

I look to the side where the 9:00 of my alarm clock glows expectantly. I close my eyes, and think about all the programming issues I'll have to deal tomorrow.

Surprisingly, it works.
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My eyes snap open. I did it! I went to sleep at a reasonable hour! ALL HAIL THE CONQUERING CHEETAH!

Ready to celebrate my historic success, I roll over and look victoriously at the alarm clock with it's pleasant, eternally patient red glowing numbers.

2:00 AM.

I am now victoriously awake. Three hours early. I groan. I'm never going to get back to sleep now.

I spend the several hours studying the insides of my eyelids.
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I hunch forward, squinting through the darkness and snow. My knuckles are white from squeezing the steering wheel. The Cheetmobile wavers side to side on the icy highway.

Before we left, Elaki had informed me, "It's snowing." A more accurate warning might have been, "OMG! ONCOMING STORM OF EVIL ICY DEATH! THE END IS NIGH!" Elaki's pretty good at keeping a cool head, though, so he just said, "It's snowing." Personally, I'm still convinced the end is nigh.

The car coming off the ramp next to me suddenly starts swerving side to side. I try to slow, but it's too icy. Next thing I know, the other car is spinning right across the entire interstate. Like most things in real life, it happens without slow motion or dramatic music. The car's just suddenly out of control in front of us. Frogger must be at the wheel, though, because, somehow, the car manages to spin its way past me and all the other vehicles without collision. Unable to help myself, I look back just long enough to see that the driver is uninjured, and then it's all past us and my concentration is on just trying not to do an encore of what we saw.

The snow calms after about an hour, but the effects of the blizzard linger. Accidents have turned traffic into molasses through the city. It takes us an hour to go 5 miles. By then, we've given up any hope of actually making our flight. In the end, thanks to a super efficient employee, we barely get on a new flight to O'Hare as standbys. Only after we're both seated do I manage to relax. I feel like I've been holding my breath since we left home.

Still, we made it, and it'll all be worth it. We're on our way to MFF!
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Knight to f7. Checkmate!

I grin. A chain of four forced move into a queen sacrifice, leading to a smothered mate. Booyah!

Proud as can be, I pass my iPod to Elaki in the seat in front of me to show off the board. He's not a chess nut like me (he's the cool kind of geek, not the nerdy chess type!) so he has no idea why I'm so excited. Still, he's happy for me anyway, because he's totally awesome like that.

I take back my iPod and put it away. 30 minutes left. I sit back, twiddle my thumbs, watch the silent talking head on the TV screen for a couple of seconds. I start thinking of the con. First time at MFF. As much as I've been looking forward to it, I'm really nervous. It's more of an east coast con, so I'm not sure I'll know anyone besides a very small handful of people. I'm pretty shy and not very good at fitting in with new groups. I remember the awkwardness during my first con, even when it was local. What if I just end up being a lame wall flower the entire time?

It'll be alright, I'm sure, but I can't help fretting.

I'm pulled violently away from my thoughts when the announcement system turns on. It sounds like Darth Vader and a screeching R2-D2 trying to sing a drunken duet. Darth Vader says we're landing so I check my seat belt and watch as dots along the ground slowly grow into buildings, then cars, then people. The plane bounces a few times before rolling down the runway.

I guess I'll just have to hope for the best. We're here.
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"It's a really good place to get a drink," the shuttle van driver informs us as we head towards the convention center. I nod politely. The guy seems to really like talking, and has been telling us basically everything about stuff normal people do when they visit Chicago. Elaki and I haven't really said much. Not that we could if we tried, because, like I mentioned, the guy really likes talking.

"Oh, and by the way, there's this furry convention going on at the Hyatt," he informs us. He looks back for a moment, gauging our reaction to that news. I'm a bit caught off guard by suddenly being part of his conversation, so I just sort of look at him blankly. He interprets this as not understanding. "So," he says, "if you see any animals walking around..."

He becomes a little more serious. "Don't panic."

Elaki and I both look at each other, deadpan, look back at him, and solemnly nod.
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Darkpaw scampers through the hallway, chasing after an over-sized tennis ball, a wake of laughter from bystanders following closely behind him. He pounces, snatches the ball, and rolls across the floor with it, morphing from a folf into the world's fuzziest, most adorable bowling ball.

A little girl not far away smiles brightly and reaches forward. "Bat!" she cries, bouncing excitedly, pointing to my other friend, Nikolai, who's right next to me. He plays with her while I give a series of fist-bumps to a group of random people passing by.

Nikolai and I switch places, and I play a game of whack-a-high-five with the girl. She giggles, having the time of her life with all of us. Her mom's laughs at the flood of crazy antics. Only then does it strike me that her mom is clearly a furry. Our fandom has become generational now, with furs having kids and their children being raised in our subculture. It's really exciting. It's really cool. It's also kind of scary because while I think our big tribe has a lot to offer someone growing up among us, it also means, in a way, we all have to be more responsible now.

I give her one last big high five for the road, and then Darkpaw, Nikolai, and I move onwards, throwing the tennis ball around, ambushing random people with foam swords, spinning leeks, and continuing the ongoing mission to put as many smiles on as many faces as possible.
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There's a side to fursuiting that many people are unaware of. Like the media seems to insist, it does involve a lot of panting, sweaty people in one room, but since it's the headless lounge, it's actually just a bunch of people trying not to die of heat exhaustion. Sitting around in wet clothes for 15 minutes is actually pretty boring and uncomfortable, so while you're there, you meet a lot of people and have all sorts of interesting discussions. Or, if you're like me and have the conversation skills of a rock, you get to listen to all sorts of interesting discussions, like the one going on right now.

"I love that you get to basically define a fursona as exactly who you want to be, whatever that is, and you get to be that person here, even when you're not in a fursuit. You get to be yourself."

It's a familiar sentiment. Defining yourself uniquely is a big part of our culture. They say different is good, but most of the time, they don't really mean it. Being different in the big wide world is hard. Really hard. There's teasing and there's pain and there's doubt. You wonder if you'll ever really belong, and you can feel so, so alone.

But look at our fandom. First step after joining: choose a fursona. You choose something that defines who you are, or what you wish to be, or what you think is cool. You re-create yourself from scratch. And then, you show your creation off through badges, art, fursuits, clothes, quirky mannerisms, talking to people about it, or simply being who you've become as a result. As a whole, we embrace the things that make us completely different from each other. That's a rare, beautiful thing. We get together every year at cons and collectively say, in the face of a conforming, intolerant world, "It's great to be different."

How cool is that?
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Elaki and I drift through the currents around the dealer's den, looking at some of the art, watching the endless variety of people floating by. A little bit away, we spot a familiar looking gray wolf. Seeing her again causes a bit of a flashback because the last time we saw her, we were heading for FC and she was dressed up like a nurse in a train station. Actually, that sounds really weird when I say that. It made sense at the time. Anyway, it's been several years since then, but we instantly recognize her.

"Silverstreek!"

We greet each other with hugs, ask how she's been, talk a little about the con. She's been holding this small box the entire time, in a slightly nervous way. Finally, she pushes it forward and points at Elaki, then me.

"For us?" we guess.

She nods.

Curious, we open the box. There's something fuzzy sticking out the top. We pull it out to find two beautiful tails. I'm about to thank her, but Elaki's still digging through the box. Out comes commissioned badges for each of us, little paw necklaces, badges certifying us as our respective species. More and more comes out of that box leaving me more than a little stunned. We only met like once and took a train trip where we playing card games together the entire way there. But she had apparently been looking forward to seeing us so much she ended up putting together a gift box over the years, resulting in a little box that was apparently packed by Timelords. And she'd done this for a week that was her birthday.

Every year, I'm blown away by the kindness of furs during conventions. This year is no exception. Not sure what to say, I give her a giant hug.

Nicest wolf evar.
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"WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY? RING-DING-DING-DING-DINGERINGEDING!"

I close my eyes tightly and facepalm. Somehow, I'd gotten this far through the entire con without hearing that song once. Until now. And I'm hearing it OUTSIDE of the con.

A bunch of us are at Adobe Gila's (ge-la, the menu helpfully informs us). It's a nice place that smells of Mexican food. TVs playing sports events and a big bar in the middle with the top covered in one dollar bills. You know the type. The music, like all places in Rosemont that we've experienced, is completely random, swinging wildly from Christmas jingles to 80s music to recent releases, such as ones asking obvious questions about foxes.

Our group takes up four tables and is composed mostly of friends of Darkpaw and LZ. Until a few days ago, I didn't even know any of them existed. Now, I look down the table and see a bunch of familiar, fun, laughing friends. People who, despite my usual awkward wall floweriness, have gone out of their way to make me feel like part of the group. Before, it'd take me a decade to get to know this many people. I suddenly feel very privileged to be here among them.

I smile, take another bite of my food as some of them start singing along with that fox song that I actually secretly kind of like. What the heck. I jump right in.

"WA-PA-PA-PA-PA-PA-POW! WHAT THE FOX SAY?"
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It's finally come. Again. The morning of the last day. I've gone to enough cons that this is horribly familiar by now. I thought it wouldn't be as bad this year, but here it is: PCD pulling at me like a sinking concrete block.

I look down from the 9th floor into the lobby. It's distressingly empty. Everyone's dressed, well, normally. Most have luggage. There's a few of those gray-topped boxes that people always keep fursuits in, each holding ghostly memories of fun that are now locked away.

I shake my head, then continue along the balcony. Consciously, I push the depressing thoughts away one by one. My walk slowly morphs from a shuffle into the bouncy walk of the cheetah I'm dressed as. By the time I reach the elevators, I'm fully him. It's like a fuzzy suit of armor. Suddenly, PCD can't touch me. I plush the button and when the elevator opens, I see an unexpected, welcome sight. Pickles! I rush forward and give the green, black, and gray zombie cat a hug. I like Pickles. He hasn't yet made me join the legions of undead, which is saying a lot for a zombie.

Together, we ride down to the first floor, look at each other, then step out together in unspoken agreement that we're going to keep this con alive as long as we possibly can. We home in on the nearest group of depressed, tired looking furs.
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Highlights:
- Charades. So. Much. Fun. Even if the other team got words like, "fishing", or "hug" while we got words like, "zentai." Special thanks to the panelist and the judges who played along so much with us teasing you guys!

- Getting dragged along by Pickles to surprise Faust and friends in his roommates in their room while in suit. So much fun

- Fighting a pirate while dressed up as a ninja.

- That guy who was pretending to pretend to be a human. I have no idea who he was, but his performance was absolutely hilarious.

Shout-Outs:
- Alyssa and Draces: Great getting to see both of you again. Thanks for saying hello. :3

- Darkpaw, LZ, and (tons of) friends: It was SO good to see you again, Darkpaw, and it was great to finally meet you, LZ! I can't tell you how awesome it was getting to spend the weekend with you guys, fursuiting, gaming, and generally just hanging out. Thanks so much for everything (and the awesome plushie and figurines!). I miss both of you. To all the new friends I met through them, thanks so much for being so incredibly kind and fun! <3 to all of you! I hope I get to run into you guys again before too long. Unless you're the bloody traitor again, in which case I hope you fall off a ladder and break your neck. :3

- Dire and Tekfox: Glad I ran into you guys at the con! It's been a while since we last said hi! Oh, and Tek, great job DJing during the Saturday dance. Despite the Fog of Smelliness™, you totally rocked. Best music of the whole con.

- Elaki: As ever, so many bloops. Thanks for the wonderful costume props you made for all of us, and for doing so much handling, and for just being the awesome person you always are!

- Faust: I'm glad we finally got to meet again (even if it wasn't for very long). Sorry our meal plans kept going all wonky! Thanks for being so awesome when I burst into your room unexpected. Can't wait to see you again at FC! \M/

- Lacy and Nick: Thanks for the new gloves (they're all soft and pretty!). Was great getting to briefly run into you guys again for the photo shoot.

- Natura Wolf: It was such a pleasure running into you at the airport before heading home. I loved talking to you and hearing about your insights into the fandom. I know it's probably not likely with you living all the way across the ocean, but I hope we'll get to see each other again soon!

- Pickles: You're so, so, soooooo awesome! I loved getting to goof off with you. I hope to see you again at RMFC!

- Pnut: Loved getting to chat with you (and dodge your tail of mass destruction)! You were adorable the entire con. :3

- Rex: I didn't even know you were going, but I'm glad we bumped into each other. I missed you at RMFC last year and it made me so happy getting to see you again! I hope you had a great MFF. May your balloons always be plentiful. :3

- Silverstreek - Again, thanks so much for all the gifts. I hope your birthday was a good one! I had a blast doing dinner with you. May you find your Helga soon. XD

- Telephone: Thanks again for taking the time to help make that video for Lava! You were as adorable as ever, and I think there were explosions from cuteness involved when he finally saw it.

- Tilt: I'm glad we met! There's never enough cheetahs around. And uh... thanks for the silly mention during your con report. Next time we're at a con together, be sure to pull me aside so we can chat!

- Zeigler: I loved getting to run into you so much throughout the con. Thanks once more for judging during charades! Best of luck on your plans for a fursuit!

As usual, with my bad memory, I know I've forgotten to mention a bunch of you, but even so, thank you for helping to make MFF an incredible one. Also, feel free to yell at me because then I'll remember to keep in touch with you. :3