For me, I started out as a submissive thanks to seeing it as an escape due to some pretty deep depression after a breakup, a way of throwing myself at the feet of my fantasies, so to speak. I just went on some hypnosis networking sites, and it was first come, first serve, literally. I started to realize that such things were not very pleasant for me, and how, at least for me, there was a disparity between fantasy and reality that made it a lot more frustrating to deal with. I believe I was never truly one who felt a connection with submissiveness, simply one that had urges, and as a self-exploratory kind of person, went for it. Admittedly, I made bad decisions and picked dominants who had too many hangups to be pleasant, and there was a lot of head-butting when I felt patronized (and trust me, I know the difference between painting a scene and the mood, and when someone is saying something in a truly holier-than-though manner). Anyway, after years of chasing that side of me, I just realized it wasn't for me.

I've been much more happy as a dominant, and for me, it isn't so much the control that is the motivating factor, while that is certainly a rush, and my sadistic side LOVES seeing people squirm in either discomfort (not DETRIMENTALLY SO) or pleasure, or both. People doing as I say is an incredible turn on for me, but more than anything, I really enjoy seeing others happy, making them happy and helping them connect in ways they might've never thought they could. I'm someone who can facilitate almost any fetish out there as I have very few limits, though I have a very high sense of ethical standards and straight-edged morals. I know the difference between a scene and abuse, and how to be very firm or gentle in tone. It's a fun kind of balance for me. Still, more than anything, it's not some kind of god complex, it's just a mutual sort of pleasure. I've helped submissives on many occasions who've had negative experiences with previous doms, helped repair trust and give them a safe haven, free from judgment or dismissal. I think that's what I like most than anything. I tend to think lowly of a lot of dominants because of my standards and because what I've seen as a submissive and what I have been through. Not all are bad, not at all, but a lot can be irresponsible, especially when it comes to hypnotic play. It sounds like you've got a nice thing going with your dominants, so congrats dear! I think another intoxicating aspect of dominance for me is seeing someone's pleasure fall into synergy with mine, as we're connected for that moment in time. That look in a person's eyes when they fall into subspace, when they lose themselves and become whisked away by my words or actions... Mmmnnhh~ Yes.

Just thought I'd chime in; you favorited a hypnosis file of mine, so I decided to check out your page and felt this post was interesting. ^^