Got a hilarious work story for you. So there i was, driving a forklift down a really narrow alley. pallets of whey on both sides of me (Whey is powdered milk, we stack them 50 bags per pallet and up to four pallets tall.)
im carrying another two pallets, destined for the back row. now ive ran this gauntlet for weeks. and i know theres a part in the alley that kind does little turnish kind motion. its not big....but because one pallet of Whey was so warped it wouldn't settle in the ideal shape. so we just kinda shifted things around to make this little round about for it. now....i know its coming. i look over and count the pallet numbers. 1880, 1882, 1884, 1886, 1888...Turn! except....i was suppose to turn AFTER 1888, not ON 1888. WHAM! POOF!....whey.... I ran into a tower of whey with the force of destiny. a jaw jarring 9mph. the fastest my forklift could go. i hit this shit going what we call "warp 9" and i hit it dead on. There was a atomic whey explosion. seriously...it was like god grabbed two over used chalk board erasers and slapped them together with me in the middle. this shit...is thick as flour but with the flight lingerance of irradiated dust. Im coughing, scrambling to get out of the whey fog that had engulfed me. from behind me..i hear my coworkers go "HE DID IT! HE FINALLY DID IT!" i leave the cloud with them patting me on the back going "Your finally one of us!" now...i know for a fact their insane. because they spent the entire day following me around going "One of us...one of us...one of us." the best part of this story...however...is that despite how much whey was in the air...and how hard i hit. i only Killed 4 bags. each pallet has like...50. and i only waxed 4

had i just waited half a second before turning i wouldn't have ended up looking like i swan dived into bad cocaine.