Borderline
10 years ago
Borderline....how do I manage to live with it....I don't!!! I can not imagine anyone wanting to stay with someone with borderline....and I do not want to put anyone thru such hell. I realize I already have. They have their choice even If I do not understand. We can create such toxic relationships not even meaning too. I for one don’t want that. However is it fair then that Borderlines be single forever?....or is there someone out there for us borderlines who can accept how hard it will be but understand and know that those of us with the disorder do not mean the toxic... I do wonder if that’s possible. I have been trying my best with what I know. See even I do not understand my borderline fully. Asking someone to be with me is a lot. But I have been trying to find the best way to have someone understand just what happens. This has proven to be difficult. I wont lie, I have my moments and lots at that. So that’s the big question then isn’t it! Can anyone love a borderline and stick with them? As I've said to my mates lots. It's not easy being in love with me.
When I say I don't live with my disorder I fully mean it. I don't I've stayed in denial about it. Avoided it. lied to cover it up. There’s all these books about living with it. And being in love with someone with it. But its not easy or simple. Course nothing in life is....However Being borderline and well having almost any kinda personality disorder takes that nothing in life is simple and times it by at lest 2. I want to say 10 or 100 as that’s how it feels to me but its probably only 2. So if even I have issues living with it.....I can not expect anyone to go thru it with me.....but those who love me have a choice too. I promised them I wont leave and I stick by that. The lying stops. The hiding stops. I keep my promises and that’s that. But here's something “DO NOT JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER OR ALL ITS ACTIONS” meaning get to know why these things happen get to know the person inside...under the borderline. I can do much better as I learn.
When I say I don't live with my disorder I fully mean it. I don't I've stayed in denial about it. Avoided it. lied to cover it up. There’s all these books about living with it. And being in love with someone with it. But its not easy or simple. Course nothing in life is....However Being borderline and well having almost any kinda personality disorder takes that nothing in life is simple and times it by at lest 2. I want to say 10 or 100 as that’s how it feels to me but its probably only 2. So if even I have issues living with it.....I can not expect anyone to go thru it with me.....but those who love me have a choice too. I promised them I wont leave and I stick by that. The lying stops. The hiding stops. I keep my promises and that’s that. But here's something “DO NOT JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER OR ALL ITS ACTIONS” meaning get to know why these things happen get to know the person inside...under the borderline. I can do much better as I learn.
pyhdrowafffox
~pyhdrowafffox
I did have read all of this and all I can tell is, again, to trust your lovers. Tell them what happens in your mind and if they can'T understand and reject you from it; you will still have your friends to back you off. There will always be people for you. But, if you lie to your people and if they learn about it, they might lose trust about you. This would do nothing good at all. I say that as both friend and lover wise.
Clockworkmaster45
~clockworkmaster45
OP
I stopped lying. anyways thanks for the comment, It means a lot to me.
pyhdrowafffox
~pyhdrowafffox
:)
Purrfectlynatural
~purrfectlynatural
Oh Isaac I told you I'm here for you thru thick and thin and I meant that I love you sweetheart and I promise ill do my best to understand
Clockworkmaster45
~clockworkmaster45
OP
-huggles tight and lovingly-
Ninfin
~ninfin
hugs
Clockworkmaster45
~clockworkmaster45
OP
huggles
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