so...I've been seeing examples of how the swiftpaws USED to be to me. its in the things they say to the new memebers, the way they act, how they say it, the way they do things, and I remember that its how it had been for me, in my first days, before I broke away to be the pet of a certain sergal whom shall not be named, if your reading this, you know who you are. and I spent so much time getting abused by hir. not physically, but mentaly and emotionally. guys, when I was with her, I was forbidden from playing with any one else in any sence naughty and innocent, I've grown shy again guys, all the "yuko you need to reach out to the other cubs" "yuko you need to play with others more" "yuko talk to so and so more" "yuko leave azzy be" yuko yuko yuko!!! GUYS PLEASE IM ONLY A LIL VIXEN, IVE BEEN BROKEN AND SHAKLED TO THE GRAVE YARD LEFT HERE TO DECAY. PLEASE, GIVE ME TIME TO GET BACK INTO THE SWING OF THINGS! ITS NEW MEMEBERS IN THE PACK IM NATURALLY SHY, BUT WITH BEING AWAY SO LONG I DON KNOW AS MUCH AS I USED TOO! OKAY IVE FALLEN BEHIND THE PACK, AZZY HER SELF SAID SO!!! okay. gusy please....if you see me clinging to azzy, just assume I have a emotnally legitimate reason to be doing so. okay? please you guys.

now also, I have a slave who is also my mate. im trying to be good to him, and it can b hard to do. okay guys please im juggiling the pack with my mate and his slave life. not to mention getting used to a new mistress who dosnt get online till late. okay you guys? im slow, and im delicate now, I can only handle soooooo much
some things will cut me deeper than others, like if I try to say ill do something for some one, don't butt in and say "yuko you cant do that, your too young." or "yuko you said your self your too shy or delecate you cant do this and I wont allow it" okay you guys who say these things I will not point you out because you know who you are, guys I have moods of my own, if I feel helpful then let me be helpful, if I feel generus, let me be generus, if I say "goes to my room to cry" don't say "shes getting a way quick pounch her and cuddle her!" because that is a good way to make me either do it any way, or go quiet or log off for a wile. I will turn to you when I feel its time to do so, DONT RUSH ME PLEASE

okay now that's out the way *phew* on to the next blood

okay, soo I have times that I will say "im 23 I don't need diapers" guys, to me that's my way of saying "i want ou to baby me please do so" okay???? if I still fight its my way of saying "i want a small spanking or other punishment too if that's okay?" alright? guys look I don't know how else I can say this. but I love you all, I do but really you guys need to understand, everything is still new to me again, im getting used to it, if I want to cling to azzy, don't take it personaly, its only because shes the one I KNOW I can count on because ive known her the longest, and shes promised to help me achive a goal that is very important to me. okay guys, don't rush me in things, stop trying to pounch me and scream at me saying "we all love you" I know you love me, and I love you too. but guys, please im begging you, I don't know how else to say it. but guys really please, im trying my hardest, I need time to settle back in and all the "yuko do this" "yuko do that" "yuko stop hogging azzy" IS NOT HELPING AT ALL please you guys I need you all to understand, I have needs that ONLY THAT SKUSKY CAN FULFIL! im not jokeing! I have needs that only azzy can help me with. not because its her I want but because she the only one who knows how. I know it sounds like im not giving you guys a try, I know that, and I know that's how it seems but guys, please, im breaking inside because azzy is the only one who knows/knew the really real me. shes the only one who can help me be that again, please guys please. please understand.

i love you all but please give me my space and my time. don't question my methods and guys if i try to do something, don't stop me because that's a sure fire way to ruin my mood and end my rp with every one right quick. don't tell me what i can and cant do. i need the time with azzy to heal. and its hard to get her attention as it is with out you guys jumping on me for hogging her. i love you all i do but. please i need this