My baby was born on july 28 2 weeks and one day late. She is healthy thank god but I feel like crap both emotionally and physically still. I also almost died in childbirth no joke.

I ended up being indiced because my body would not get ready to let the baby out fast enough. I was induced and having contractions for 52 hours. Inductions tend to be longer than normal labor. I think they are evil. They first gave me a pill to get my body to finish getting ready for baby to come out and dialate more. This pill put me into contractions 1 to 2 mins apart but I was still only 1 cm dialated so they had to keep not giving me the next dose of the pill since that was too many contractions for that stage. This went on a few days. Then since this medicine did not really dialte me beyond 1.5 cm I ended up with a foley baloon put up there. Its a baloon with salt water inflated to 4 inches which is suppose to make u diatale to that size. During this whole time I was having contractions 5 mins apart on my own. Dinally after the baloon worked they were going to try the petocin. By this time (day 3) I was in so much pain I finally oppted for the epideral.

Some hours later I was still only 5 cm dialted and the baby was undergoing fetal distress so I ended up with a unplanned C-section.

After the c-section I only got to see my baby 20 mins before I started to hemmerage because my uterus was not contracting down. I lost over half the blood in my body and ended up needing a transfusion with 3 unitd of blood and another unit of plasma. During this time the doctor said ther was nothing eles they could do to stop the bleeding, ( the medicine to stop it was not working at first) The nurses and some doctors eould not look at me or looked at m in horror and looked away. I can not tell you how scary that was when the doctors and nurses are scard you might die. Finally the doc massaged the area of the newly sewed up csecton for 40 mins and it stopped bleeding.

After I found out that I was not making enough milk due to the hemerraging to feed my baby, and since I have not been able to produce much even though Iv done lots of pumping. It makes me feel horrible that my body is so broken it could not even have the baby natuerally, and now I can not feed her that way either.

Since all this happeened Iv been in pain from he csection as the meds have not completly worked, and I have gotten a secondary infection and the antibiotics upset my stomake and inegestion. Today I broke into hives twice and am still very emotional. The hubby thinks I have post partum depression. I just get scared that I will be into too much pain or something to be alble to take vcare of the baby on my own which I have to do now he has gone back to work.

So if you are wondering why have not invited you over its because I feel super crappy emotionally and physically. I just wish I could feel better so I could better care for my baby.