Here is what has been going on for me.

I have a new job now in the military, yes im a Airmen, im doing 6 year term atm as a fire protection unit. i join because as some of you know i like helping alot, i help many people and my step father got me to join the airforce and i must say it wasnt hard to pass. i say that cause i been through worst places than boot camp. so atm im in a new enviorment in text school in training.


Thanksgiving was my first time being alone for the holidiays and wont be my last either. i now have to make sacrifices to be able to protect those i care about. it sucks thought but it was my choice and i will accept it.


But at the moment i am sturggling with budget, i might be in the military but doesnt mean we get alot of money, in fact we still get barely the the wadges of regular jobs, while i been gone at boot camp i got a bill that wasnt solved before i left that i wasnt notified, not i owe alot of money like 350. i also found out from my back i been fruad and they are trying to make me pay for the money but atm im still fighting of paying ZERO of it.

Why does this matter? well to me it matters cause i wanted to see my family for Christmas but right were im heading at looks like i might be alone for Christmas.


as others know about me is that alot of things changed about myself cause i was refusing to show the real me but this is who i am, im a person that cares alot of those that generous to me as well and i will help them out as much as i can, and yes i am too kind in my point of view. been so kind i been donating too much that caused me to be down right broke right now. Also one more thing people know me well for, I HATE ASKING, i dont like it at all specially for money i like earning it more than just getting money.


I also have hidden depression which is just i have it but i dont show it only to people i am close to that see it and notice it. im also the person that love to give alot attention to and help others, but i dont get that back at all but that doesnt bother me that much as it used to. but still hurts kinda but i have few people that helped me out on that.



ill find ways to pay those back that already donated to me. but if you can help me see my family for christmas that would mean so much and if you cant can always spread the word, but if it cant make it ill find a way to just do someone alone for Christmas.


ill leave my paypal here : Jonathan_shapley[at]yahoo.com


I want to thank right now

my big bro

My papa

My mate


they were willing to help me out donate and when i went through rough times they were their to help me out

they are what i consider family that helps other family out, never felt that before and it feels amazing.